Author: rike jokanan

For hundreds of times
I say
It doesn’t matter for 
The unanswered prayers,
The unrequited love,
The abandoned dreams,
The disrespect,
The mistreatment—
They are stations
Where I transit for a while
Just a while
Among all kind, beautiful stations of
Answered prayers,
Unconditional love,
Friendly respect,
Sweet treatment
With which I believe
This journey deserves meaning
Of which I choose my battles.

I’ve chosen
You
And no other.

——

I love my life as it is with its messiness and imperfection. Thank you!

the dirty soil left behind has presented a vase of tulips colouring these days

so delicate and alive like life ♥️

Be One

Renew everyday,
Said she.

——

🐣

i’ve seen so many broken people getting up and becoming the best version of their selves; i’m blessed to have met them ♥️

A Head In A Table

This head, Beloved
Is full of colours
That suck all memories
To an abandoned landfill
Where poems dance in joy
Recycling precious moments
Into glowing beads
Jingling around a neck,
Chuckling on millions of love wishes
That scatter on a table.

——

yeah! this is one busiest corner of my head everyday! messy yet full of love 💕😀

Broken Hearted

How would I not
Be broken hearted?
You ignored me.

You celebrated the love.
You showed off engagement.
You broke my heart in any possible ways.

Universe does conspire.

I am now dancing,
Your existence to me is untrue.
I never lose you.



note: this poem was composed by me as a response to an AI’s poem claimed beautiful by one colleague 😄

——

My conversation with two colleagues at lunch break yesterday

C1: I used AI to write a poem for my mother on her birthday recently.

Me: A poem by AI?

C1: Yes and it is beautiful and everyone in my family likes it a lot.

Me: You requested a poem from AI?

C1: Yes!

Me: Oh sad. I was not noticed. Why didn’t you ask me to do it for you?

C2: Ya, she is a poet outside her job. You never know?

C1: No….

Me and C2: (could not stop laughing at me beaten by AI)

not sure if it is AI’s work but it is pretty, just downloaded it from the Internet — i was so broken hearted by the AI poet yesterday, not anymore 😛

Dress Up

Dress up,
Beloved
Even when you work remotely.
Dress up,
Beloved
Even when you’re alone in the cubicle.
Dress up,
Beloved
Even among the crowd; wave your hands with genuine smiles.
Dress up,
Beloved
Even if your style’s outlandish; be busy with how your story can go.

There’s sun spotting your colours.
There’s wind kissing your scent.
There’s moon drawing your silhouette.
There’re stars showering you with breathing confetti.

——

all my path is catwalk on which i walk presenting a designer’s masterpiece — no excuse of low performance, any chance to walk is to display the best of my designer’s pride

my style is work of art that might be differently interpreted and appreciated — it doesn’t matter, people see what they want to see and hear what they want to hear although they can’t lie to themselves

i love my style more and more everyday

♥️

Happiness?

Are you happy?

i might not agree with some part of the convo yet i like listening to this talk 👏🏼

AI

I had a conversation about AI and its possible role in the doomsday of the human being life on this Mother Earth.

F1: I am not afraid as I like it or not the earth is going to be destroyed by whomever as per many scenarios written in traditional beliefs, religious scripts and even scientific estimate. If not destroyed by external power, it must have expiry date — it will be “self” destroyed.

F2: I am worried. This inorganic thing is a threat to us. We need to limit ourselves from the AI use.

F3: I don’t care but I think I also care.

F4: I am angry with those ambitious intelligent human beings who keep expanding the ability of AI. Don’t they think about the negative impacts both to the confusion of other human beings and the future of earth life.

F1: If they keep adding to the intelligence to the AI then the AI will develop. I don’t know how to stop this. I am just a small dot in a vast black block. So if it develops, may be it. I will just enjoy my life.

F2: What we can analyse should be the basis of our decision. Yes, we are not VIP on earth but all human beings are VIP in their own life who should not just let others destroy their life without fighting back. Fight back!

F3: How?

F4: At least you should know who is AI who is not.

F1: You mean AI can converse?

F2: Yes of course! They are another level of robot! They are a developing inorganic that is growing with the growth of the creators. It is like human being is becoming a god creating the next level of human being based on human being’s image.

F3: Are you exaggerating?

F4: I AM NOT!

F1: Oh my Lord! This is exactly what God did — creating us with His image.

F2: Yes, and God must be crazy because H is now showing His massively expansive power that has made human beings a god creating another god that creating AI that might become the next god.

F3: What?

F4: Yes! AI will go to where human beings have not experienced. AI is a collective data and information from dead and living human beings. Look how massive the combination of decision and action AI can make to expand the life.

F1: Good God! Worse is AI doesn’t have ethic.

F2: That’s what is needed. Is it possible to have AI that bears ethic as an ingrained value; or at least implanted.

F3: It depends on the creators.

F4: You know what Harari said? AI can create a new religion!

F1: Scarry, friends. let’s now talk about this.

F2: We have to talk about this. And we have to talk about this to the next generation.

F3: Stop it. You don’t have child.

F4: I have nephews and nieces! I can talk to them.

F4: But they will not listen to you. If they don’t even listen to their parents, how will they listen to others?

F1: Maybe the parents are not as good. The teachers are not either. The aunts might be better like us.

F2: My students listen more to what people in TikTok than to me. Sad!

F3: My kid consults to ChatGPT instead of reading books. She said the summary is unbelievably accurate and helps her write papers in school.

F4: ChatGPT is a baby AI. What AI can possibly exist for other fields? Finance. Military. Medicine. Agriculture. Education. And so on. And so forth. Imagine in military field — AI makes war. AI activates all the nukes on earth. Human beings are grouped based on AI categorisation. Those who don’t follow AI will be stranded in desolated area. AI rules, human beings are enslaved. Imagine science that is believed to make life more advanced and easy with no ethic — bad AI.

F1: Our children need to know about what is ethical and what is not then. AI depends on the good will of the creators.

F2: Hey! Ethic might be misunderstood as religion and young kids are not interested to what smells like religion.

F3: What smells religion is religion.

F4: Not necessarily. What smells rose is not always rose.

F1: Hey! What if AI really is in the process of making a new religion that will make our children think differently from us?

F2: Why are you so afraid of others thinking differently from you?

F3: It is ok if you have different way of thinking than me; but not my children!

F4: Ah! We are so caught up by AI. It is because of you!

F1: Let’s just stop. Just don’t forget that AI doesn’t need rest; it might be a baby now, it will grow with your kids even exponentially faster and more sophisticated. If creators are greedy, the AI will really be unleashed monsters and eat the creators….

F2: Stop! Let the smart ones take care of this.

F3: The Government should protect us from AI spreading with very robust law.

F4: No one will protect us. We have to protect ourselves.

F1: If we don’t even know which is AI and which is not, that is very dangerous.

F2: Start from the definition of intelligent.

F3: Come on…. Let’s just talk about something else.

F4: Harari said AI is alive.

F1, F2, F3: Stop!!!

Mountains

Mountains to climb
As seas to sail
Diving deep in to the oceans
Knowing to go and to fail

——

7 Mountains (60%)

Happy Together

Walking the aisle
Two smiling earthlings can’t stop waving hands
To us
Who wonder
“They were toddlers we hugged,
Now they read solemn vow?”
It is a happy day
When we pray, laugh and eat together
Witnessing happiness that proceeds.

——

Matt, my best friend’s youngest son is getting married today! Matt and Cheer, Tante Rike happy for you 😘😘😘 send me all our pictures ♥️

cheering with groom’s mama after eating 😂 day is good with those looking forward to bright days ♥️

The Poem

My poem for you
Is not in the words.
My poem for you
Sits on the bed of this heart.
The words that you recite
Is what language can say
About what is still,
Admiring you from a secret place
That keeps everything
And keeps flowing.

——

some poem is better utterred on canvas

a small play for a toilet at home; an intermezzo to take a break from the gift painting in progress

Under A Bridge of Self Doubt

There is a bridge
I cross
Where I look down
Then look up
Sometimes look back
Before looking ahead.
So much to entertain outside
That makes me so heavy inside.
So much to celebrate inside
That doubts me even harder than hard.

The bridge is swayed through colours
That I misunderstand as red but actually black,
That I thought black but actually green,
That looks green yet actually beige.
I feel like finding grass
Then a pool of water lilies
Blooming under the bridge.
No, under the blue sky—
And what I thought a bridge is just a rainbow
Where beautiful goddesses slide down to bath
On earth
In this flowing river
Called heart.


note: poem that emerged when i finally thought the painting was 50% done

——

50% maybe…. if i once again not repaint it

this is the painting that has taken the longest time to do even with sketches that i’ve made confidently; i believe that the owner-to-be gives so much mental contribution to the process of making — the owner is one intelligent friend who has quite high self doubt even in her high quality of self/life

she has everything: high IQ and EQ, beautiful physical, warm personality, very successful rich husband, sweet smart children, respecting family and friends — yet with it the biggest question is “what if?”

i seldom feel doubtful about my painting although not many think my work is beautiful because i paint to just express my circulating emotions, not my artistic talent

she might be rejecting this painting as a gift and i am ok, yet the poem above will not be rejected and will give her sweet smiles 💝

Love ‘Coz It’s Time

There’s a crook
I can’t understand.
It is when I saw
You in silence
And said in heart
“I find no reason in 
You for me to love but
What is this emotion?”
There’s another
I can understand.
It is when I felt
A warm summer
And said in heart
“There’s enough reason to love
You in silence
That forever blooms.”

No reason is needed to love
For love is blind.
Yet there’s reason to keep the love
For love is the only kind.

It’s time
When it’s time.

——

my orchids after one week left home alone

welcome! my orchids have taught me that flowers bloom when it’s time; not to be seen, not to be picked, not to be admired; they’re blooming simply to bloom — there’s only one reason to understand: it’s time

what is her ID? unknown and still beautifully blooming

with a line of my white shirts hanging as the background, this oncidium is gonna be yellow

another stem of oncidium waiting for its timing to greet me with yellow

dendrobium peeps again — thank you

dendrobium from the same cluster in the same pot that keeps greeting me with health and happiness

Dear Omiyage

You’re my best omiyage
From wherever Nihon
I visit.
You’re my desperate love songs
I sing
From wherever corner of the world
I sit.
You’re my sweet mystery
That I can never solve.
Why
Oh why,
Dear
Omiyage?

I present
You to only
Those that I love.

Wrapped in white
Ribboned in red
Wished in indigo

Dear
Omiyage

——

Japanese omiyage is the same tradition of Javanese oleh-oleh in which local souvenirs are brought for others after traveling to a specific place or simply when visiting. So it is not just random souvenirs, omiyage or oleh-oleh is a token of experience sharing and caring friendship from someone to someone else.

A sweet gesture that will be perfect when done with sincerity and mindfulness—

Salaam.

Niigata rice, the best omiyage for good friends this time — humble ladies, see you tomorrow 🙏🏼

About omiyage

Blue on Green

Look! It’s blue on green
Burning spirit to trueness
Of living simple.

——

I love the rice field sprawling along the train track in Japan. It brings feel of peace at the same time reminding me that there are still those who are willing to live as farmers even (according to my Japanese friends) with not so high income.

God bless farmers without whom we won’t live.

Salaam.

irrigation that travels like blood in body

the clouds that travel by the wind like dream in mind

Transit

Life’s a swift transit
Where tripper’s redirected
To where home resides.

——

before going home i made myself a rush to visit this three-tier turret of Takada Castle

behind the pink

behind the white

behind the purple

and right in front of it

Life

The price of good life:
A cluster that can grow wild
On the grey tree bark?

——

which is more precious? bark of the tree or the fungi growing happy? are they mutually enriching each other?

I See You

I see you, beauty
When I walk or sit or rest.
You’re sheer, true yet mute.

——

beauty is everywhere, dancing in silence 💕

Summer

It’s ever summer
When smile is sweet, words are true.
Then sun is joining.

——

thanks, Jasmine-san for bringing me to this place!

summer

pottery is never too cute

it is free opener; two for one diner

my 1st nato in life which was ummm…. and sticky yam or something which was amazing

one of my colleagues who is loving Japanese food will be so happy to finally see me eat sashimi without throwing up 😂

i love tempura and this is one of the best one i’ve ever had!!! and much cheaper than the ones in Singapore ☺️

yesss!!! Joetsu rice is the best and so is the sushi! 💕

sushi, sushi, sushi!

this fish cake that i’ll never be able to recook! perfect!

Blessed Belly

Learning, Map It!, Poetic

This blessed belly sings
And dances then soon to sleep
With a dream waiting.

——

i politely rejected an invite of dinner so i could eat alone in an izakaya – 😍 having dinner at the window while seeing people passing by bringing joy or anger after work or school brought me to a corner called “thanks god i’m alive”

💕 izakaya with a glass of green tea, carrot juice, and….

potato salad!

edamame obviously

chicken 🫣 oil oil oil!

most of Javanese love this fish! incl me! 💕😍♥️

pickled cucumber

chicken skin and gizzards! i can be joyful just with this cheap food! 😍 but i want the best sushi in town tomorrow! 😁

On A Green Mountain

Learning, Map It!, Poetic

On a green mountain
She stands, claps and bows to pray
For what’s been wished for.

——

Day was clear, no June rain welcomed me. Black birds were cawing but not noisy when I arrived, the caws sounded more like “this woman is not important and harmless, let her do what she wants to do. Leave her alone.”

The scent of just mown grass infused stronger freshness to the hanging air and sprinkled refreshing vibe to the scenery.

A lady in the shrine shop greeted me excitedly in Japanese which made me feel like attending an oral communication test with a desperate teacher thinking “fail, fail, fail”. Yet her beautiful smile cajoled me to take one ema (wooden plaque in shrine to write wishes and prayer) to write what I wish to wish forever for me and everyone.

About ema

The most impressive that day were the taxi drivers who drove me to the shrine and back to the hotel— both were willing to find the most basic vocabulary and grammar to make me feel good to practice my pre-basic Japanese; two grandfathers who accompanied a confused granddaughter blabbering Japanese gibberish.

Yet the shrine itself was the cherry on top of the cake that day. Shrine and castle never fail me!

Thank you, Kasugayama Mountain for welcoming me and letting me enjoy the shrine and its surrounding.

Thank you for letting this heart throb seeing what can grow in silence and for letting this soul sit still observing what can leave with no trail.

I am lucky. Always.

💕

going in to the Kasugayama Shrine compound

my friend asked me in Instagram “how many steps?” i said to her “i didn’t count, i will next time” but in my heart “one third of my breath” 😀

torii at the front gate of Kasugayama Shrine

ablution station before stepping to the shrine inner area to pray

i wish prosperity and blessings for my company ♥️♥️♥️

ema: after almost 50 years living, i can only wish the loudest possible in my heart “May All Beings Be HAPPY. All my dreams come true. ♥️”

prayers are hanging everywhere, tied anywhere — people want their wishes come true; as simple as that

if people don’t believe in the power beyond powers, why do they want to pray? to boost confidence? formality? culture? i’m sure they do it because they’re sure it is there whatever people call it beyond what’s taught in religions — i pray as others do

do you know the guy standing on the hill? Uesugi Kenshin — respected daimyo in his era

About Uesugi Kenshin

there is Kasugayama Castle ruin on top of the Kasugayama mountain — i didn’t go though, maybe next time

Ride The Life, Don’t Fly

I used to fly the life
Faster and quieter,
Passing by blue sky,
White clouds over the lands and oceans.
Yet now I ride mine
Slower and merrier,
Passing greenery and buildings.
I heard others chat and laugh;
I am not curious about the convo
But I enjoy the laughter.
I will arrive slightly later 
But happier,
Friendlier,
And luckier.

——

riding Shinkansen is more exciting than flying, I used to fly from one city to another in Japan but not anymore although recommended for some areas — always get new things in each ride! 💝

i feel lucky always and today i see same combinations of numbers appeared repeatedly that has made me feel even luckier — although i don’t know, i prefer to believe that it is a good sign before i forget it 😄

Hakutaka 555 departed at 844

sometimes i am superstitious 😁

yet i thank him for making some of my superstition sound scientific 😁

Just Believe

Do you believe sun will rise in the east?
I don’t need to believe because I know it does.

Do you believe your mother will love you unconditionally?
I believe it? I know she does.

Do you believe love will guarantee your happiness?
I do believe it will.
Why?
I do believe because I don’t know.

——

i know Doraemon has a magical pouch from which he pulls all what he needs to either solve problems or to entertain Nobita — i believe he will give Nobita lessons learnt to wise up including giving him rather dangerous disaster, yet i know it is just a story

i believe i need to replace my Doraemon bag with one cuter one as i know someone would love to use this Doraemon bag for her weekend hangout 😀

In Some Frames

Learning, Map It!, Poetic

In some frames she sees
Joy and fun. Simple actions:
Plain humanity

——

one of our young friends in Indonesia is having birthday soon and she wants wishes from overseas as present so i was requested to take picture here and later when i arrive in my destination saying “Happy Birthday …. from ….” 🥰

why bookmarks are cute? 🫣 a young friend used to bring me bookmarks whenever meeting me until she realised that i use random paper to mark my reading 😅 and i mostly forget where i insert my bookmarks so i just lose most of them 🙏🏼 sorry

many said waiting is the most boring activity — not if we know that it is for something worthy 💝 or at least seeing many airport officers do their jobs make me realise everyone matters in life

please put the trolley back after use to the trolley station, this simple act (of either you call it kindness or self discipline) helps them a lot 💝 don’t forget to give them smile 😊

Surrender

Bob, Learning, life, love, Map It!, Poetic, This Person

With no white towel
I surrender
To the realm that hugs this heart.
I am water flowing
With no effort
To the ocean that waits for this mind.
How would this name
Say no to a call that sings love songs?
I submit everything
With a smile
And grace.
Body, mind, spirit and soul—

-

Jun 10, 2023
when the air taps my whole reality
with everything subtle and overwhelming

——

please excuse my strong arms 😀

after the Tapa Brata my classmates and I are still escorted to meditate everyday of 60 minutes for 90 days

it should be 36th day today but i only have 33 days in which i am able to do full meditation — in fact my doctor was quite surprised that unbelievable progress is indicated in better numbers from the laboratory test result after i meditate regularly — happy tears 🥹

my health is much better with calmness that is on track and harmonious thought that builds gradually

i’ve registered to next level Tapa Brata next Sep so i can get more benefits to help certain issues in this beloved aging body and to strengthen my mind

can’t wait to meet with the wise teachers who guide us and humble caretakers who help us with daily needs in Forest Island 🥰

i don’t know for sure what i can share from my achievement through meditation yet maybe someday i can help others reduce health complaints at low cost — i’ve always wanted to cure diseases with fragrance and herbs; my high intelligent friends said “pseudoscience, a crap wrapped in fancy paper”, i said “it doesn’t matter at least i can help them feel calmer and think positive”

all what happen in my life are like magic both the unexpected and expected — i hope my meditation brings more good magical celebrations to me and my beloved family and friends

and all…

May All Beings Be Happy

💕

Lightning

Lightning is so quick
Striking sight with its brightness
Before earth goes silent.

——

Love is sometimes a sight that attracts the eyes, strikes in less than one minute, blinds the eyes for some longer time before gradually clears the mind again. Gradually yet surely 💝 with intensifying silence and lack of reciprocity. Life will be back to its true beauty.

May all beings be happy.

in this case a writer is either a loyalist or a stupid! both not equivalent with the brilliance in his/her writings 😂

We Are Just Like That

Malaysia, Singapore and Indonesia — we are just like that! 😂 We enjoy our great bond of being a family. 😂

💝

😝👍🏽

Romantic