Category: This Person

Love languages
Dig up the buried to see
What have tuberized.

I love learning languages although the mode is getting slower and slower. Excitement is still there; I won’t want to lose the spark to harvest what’s grown by a hope to preserve the way my brain works. All brains work more and more slowly by ageing but I won’t let mine lose its engines even before the end.

I’ve learnt Arabic & Japanese again. Arabic is a tool for me to comprehend the Quran as I see at times that the translation into English or Indonesian sound like interpretation rather than translation. I don’t want interpretation, I do translation.

Japanese is for me to practice something different because learning it I’ve been “forced” to use non Latin based words— hiragana, katakana and kanji make me actively memorize the lines, the curves, the dots, the strokes and the meaning with senses: listening, speaking, reading, writing.

I’d like to learn my own language: Javanese with which I hope to carve my image more clearly as a Javanese woman in this life canvas.; with which I find what’s buried in the hidden pockets of ancient knowledge

Time, do stay.

Sunset

Learning, life, This Person

Sunset, Beloved
Slides with this plane to the edge
Or to the center
Of a line with marching dots
With unknown end. She’s blessed.

I normally close the window lid yet today I’d love to enjoy this beautiful sunset. 💕

Loved

love, This Person

Loved, I feel it, Love
Deeply by a sweet lover.
A mirror stands still.

A Lab That Recognises Other Labs (ranting)

life, This Person

A lab, Beloved
Is it closed on a Sunday?
I'd like to meet you.

This life to me is a laboratory in which I do my jobs to become. Every day is a new expression, experiment, finding, disclosure, on and on. My senses are the doors with which all the consumables, samples and specimens that sometimes line up nicely on the racks of my labs, or sometimes just fall down on the floors as a bulk, or sometimes disappear before even being touched or registered.

How do I feel in a lab?

That’s not the right question. It should be how do I feel as a lab?

It’s so fun to catch everything flying like dusts through my senses: messy messages, unfiltered algorithms, layered truths, disguised symbols, weak signals, etc…. They started approaching me as disturbances in my early tenure in the lab, until finally I realized that I’ve been a lab prepared & grown with high technology named “human being”—that was when they started becoming the witnessed, the witness, the evidences and the proofs that days in life are chains of processes whose miracles are blinking as information, data, insight and wisdom on and on and on. I thought information to data to insight to wisdom was a rigid line; then again this lab strangled me with reality that with my simple observation and questioning, even a wisdom could have beeen an info or data.

The way I’ve made hypothesis has educated me with “smart guess” when direct answers are on the way. The predictions loyally accompany me on the way of experimentation in which by times I have to let go a lot of variables after trial and error with which I keep everything else exactly the same; letting go off variable is truly big leaps in my lab—teaching me that nothing can live forever even when I stay loyal to it.

If I have a database built in, probably the data in my lab can connect to the akashic records in which everyone else’s akashic ribbons intertwined or at least touch lightly with each other. That explains why sometimes our analysis is similar or even exactly the same even when we don’t know each other—my lab database recognizes other human being’s lab database obviously.

Life is never about conclusion although in the lab I have made a lot of conclusions and put them in the database; yet I am sincerely waiting anytime to re-open the conclusion when the coming specimen tells me to do so. My conclusion will be forced to peel another layer of the onion.

My friendship is precious because my friends & the way we relate with one another have been the power of check and balance to my arrogant if not intelligent conclusions. Peer review among human beings (through direct or indirect interactions) is inevitable.

Alamak! I believe I’m a living witness that the lab is not only me; everyone is. Hello, fellow scientists!

How amazing life is!

Dear, Beloved. It is blessed to be alive. Someday when this blessing is taken back, please make it a gift to those finding it.

Thank you.

Dear, Love….

(continually updated for clarity and accuracy, fyi I rarely review my draft before uploading) 🍀

Listed

Listed, Beloved
You’re number 1 after me.
Am I your zero?

my running playlist today

Hello, You

Hello, you! Dear love
Who knocks on many wrong doors.
You is a true door.

sometimes I’m amazed to see my playlists – so old…. yet they’re the doors to this old soul

🤩

Magnified

Learning, life, This Person

Magnified, my love
The fine lines around your eyes--
How time flies so fast!

I’m still reading Japanese books with furigana and so I need magnifying glass to do it. Yet holding magnifying glass when reading books is not fancy 😁

So I decided to change my reading spectacles +2 to +3….

and look at the medicated oil (the minyak cap Kapak) that I’ll breath in to ensure the air is fresher and the eyes are wider 🤩

Old, almost….. And I love experiencing it as breathing makes me human being.

Fun

Learning, life, This Person

Fun under the sun,
Running, walking in circle.
Happy finisher—

my 1st 5K

fun!

Dancing

Dancing, Beloved
With you on an autumn day.
No word, just whispers

I’ve not listened to this song for so long until yesterday someone in my team teased me with this song. She said “I want to sing my song to you, it suits your vibe!”

I couldn’t say anything. What can I expect from a 66yo strong lady but accuracy of how she sees her junior?

I want to go to Japan again, walking around Tokyo with so a few words but many meaning in silence. 2027, please come soon. I miss my walking buddy a lot. 😁🥰

Conversing

Conversing with you
Under the sun smiling shy--
We whisper out loud.

taming that’s within

Green

Learning, life, Poetic, This Person

I'm green, Beloved
Standing as young as a tree
After a shower.

being green is freshly thinking based on what’s my breathing brought me: peace & acceptance

Red Round

Red round, Beloved
A dot where signal will blink
At a looking eye--

I bought a keychain of Daruma without one eye, wishing to draw the missing one soon when my wish comes true….

❤️

You Ask Me

You ask me, my Love
What a heart I want to hug.
That that that sense
Senses as deep, vast, warm and clear
With a throne for it to roar--

roar? or meow…. 😻

Bowing

Bowing, Beloved
I to all telling me off
That I am lower.

I’m bowing to all, I’m in a lowest position to respect the whole universe–

Thank you.

Brightened

Dear Life....
Even if you're as gloomy as dull days,
I'll brighten you up.
There is so much colour saved for
You.

let’s start with yellow

then more…..

yet I truly know my colours don’t always make others’ day so I decided to be as bright as I can be & won’t let others’ colour bother me

Rainy Nights

Rainy nights, my love
Send music that knocks the walls
With a sweet greeting.

A Ghost Within

She's a ghost within
Drawn with steps, breaths and thoughts.
Colouring a life--

a ghost within reminding me everyday that no one is perfect

a self portrait of 50% or maybe 0% or maybe 100% each day I touch it

looking like a ghost of my own dead

😁

Those In

How can they be
Part of me?
Emerging
Merging
Like a history.
Who am I? Or who am I supposed to be?
Are those in possibly?
Or none?
Let it be.

Semar

his wisdom & simplicity — my #1 wayang kulit

Anggraeni

my #1 female wayang, a nobody in the wayang box, a loyal wife to a loyal husband — a humble abode for a humble soul

Anoman

he is a symbol of sheer devotion & vitality — what’s more do you want in life?

Larasati

an intelligent woman married to a superior man — still she is willing to be a humble background although she is allegedly much more skilful than her well-known husband, Arjuna

Sri Kresna

I used to misunderstand about his super wised-up character until finding him a mastermind of the biggest battle of a family — The Bharatayudha

no more Sri Kresna as my super wayang

Arjuna

I used to think a perfect man is like him until finding myself as someone who asks too many questions; no perfect man –if like him– can handle me

I let go off him long time ago

😎

Limbuk

I thought I was one princess in the wayang box but I am ok to be her — someone who is willing to be as humble as herself, fun as herself, relaxed as herself, witty as herself, confident as herself, flirtatious as herself, devoted as herself, mature yet childlike as herself, happy-go-lucky as herself

just like herself in herself wherever she is put to be

Bima

my father’s favourite

Blossom

It's cherry blossom
Gracefully sway down to earth.
Mother's pink blanket--

under late cherry blossom, Himeji

Playing

Shadow, Beloved
With whom this body's playing.
Well dissipated--

some people prefer working on their shadows, I’m in

Written

Oh, Beloved, my!
It's written. Who will read it?
If no heart recites.

maktoub

It's three, Beloved
Walking the path to the light.
Bless us. Please bless us.

Folded Paper

Folded paper, Love
Hides faces, shows a
figure.
Bowing to the soul--

bowing to the soul by not bowing

Curtains

Curtains, Beloved:
Drawn to find your pretty face;
Closed to hide my heart--

“hello, black cat”, said a lady

“hello, white shadow”, said a cat

Seigaiha

Missing the calmness that sings.
Missing the peace that dances.
Missing the cheer than paints.
Missing the stillness that recites.
Missing all that lives caressing this hair
With the breeze of love
Of love
Of love.

Life is just like that.
Just like
You--

Seigaiha

I’ve Started Thinking