graphs of my Universe
Nuts ‘bout you she is,
Doesn’t mind if you know not.
Beautifully wrapped
By the hard shell from nature;
Sweetly tasted in silence—
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Life is uniquely designed to be experienced differently to taste the same reality. This sweet is that sweet and it is called sweet….
….with spectrum of sweetness spread from zero to infinity
Is that?
Dear tree, wait for her.
She’s caught up but will come back
To give you big hug.
Not that you miss her hugging.
It’s she missing your stillness.
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Some friends are so loyal that they still touch your heart even without talking to you.
Thanks to a friend from a distance for her humble wisdom every now and then, for inspiring me silently….
Where are you, oh dear?
Mountains and oceans are passed
By with beauty glued
As memory. Beloved,
Where’s the next stop? Peek a boo!
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When I was young; I joined spiritual workshop, class, training; read spiritual books, journal, articles; listened to spiritual preaching, cassettes, radio programs; name more —mostly informal, some non-formal, one formal not finished oh I’m blessed that It wasn’t. Whenever I was asked why I did, I would say “I wanna know God.”
Hopeless popus!*
Has anyone experienced this looking-sophisticated-but-actually-comical thing? Thanks God (s/he’d like to be censored actually) I’m not alone in this zero to zigzagging journey— from being very excitedly curious to being a drunken master. 🤪
What a blessed journey it was!
If I’m supposed to tell that young me when starting through the reading of those looking-sophisticated-yet-actually-comical random materials, I would say “Hey, Lady Haha! You should have a map but a destination is paramount!”
And I still feel so blessed!
May all haha moments be deciphered. 😊
* refer to the video of “How To Dad” in “How To Teach A Kid Curse Words”.
Where to go? Let’s go!
River never knows but flows.
This is estuary,
Beloved, sea welcomes you.
Black to blue is true. Slow down....
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One of my best friends is flying to Bali this morning. She’ll live in her most favourite island for how long only Heaven knows.
We knew she has dreamt of living in Ubud without knowing how to materialise it as she’s a full time employee in Jakarta and her job requires her to sit in front of her computer for 8 hours a day 5 days a week. Bali was just a holiday or weekend escapade that helps refresh before going back to the busy metropolis.
We had a 3-hour call last night, celebrating her flight to her paradise! She’s happy. I’m happy for her.
How can I not believe that this pandemic is a blessing? It has moved someone’s cubicle to her living room then to her mother’s home, and soon to a beautiful place where dreams have lingered for Heaven knows how long. I can imagine how serene and fun her productivity will be!
May all beings be happy.
Flow, Beloved. Flow. Be a river whose stream knows Its gravity. Yours Is me? Making it flow back To where a home is. Within—
—
A river is a river only when the stream is moving to a point of a pulling force. Don’t get stuck or blocked because that is when you lose your being as a river.
Find the tiniest gap and flow….
You look perfect, Love Mechanically living. I can’t reach you, Love. You’re deadly cold snow— heartless Pushing me farther away.
—
Some work of art is precisely designed, formulated and worked by robot. Accuracy, precision, flawless
Some is beautifully designed, measured and worked by living artist whose movement is built through heart and soul. Relatively beautiful with direct human touch
Each prefers one with some price
Some human beings are so mechanical, they don’t know how to respond others humanely. They simply see things through a flow chart. Hope that this group extinct soon.
May all beings be happy.
When you reach the shore, Let the sand pull you into Everlasting pores, Put life to start once again. Life stories of wave and wind
—
How will you be back to shore after being brought back to sea….
….every second, minute, hour, day, week, month, birthday, death, life….
….Repeatedly?
How do I love you? You’re my movie. You’re my song. I memorise you. You know me not. Read me not. Flashback through this diary.
An old man’s waiting For the sun to rise. He moans At the moon. “Dark night, Pull away. You block me from Beauty.” — Life’s a mentalist.
—
Who is the true beauty? The moon or the sun? Debatable! It’s a matter of played tricks of layered lights— light upon light with darkness in between. How would it be not cozy hiding under a cool calm night while patiently welcoming morning? How would it be not fun playing in a warm radiant day while cheerfully welcoming dusk?
Ah…. Why should one be getting old while constantly denying what is….
Salaam….
I want to love you Like loving a song. It's free, Everyone’s happy Without jealousy, they sing In joy.... While you’re still mine, Love—
What a luxury to love someone who’s been the favorite of many…. Sharing joy in silence….
Like this humble song from me to you…. A Javanese love song whose meaning is deep and joyful; filled with prayer and admiration to the beloved – whoever the beloved is meant by the singer.
Music is a beautiful wire connecting the hearts….
Enjoy.
Anger, Beloved Consumes hope, kills compassion, Drains the lake of love. Know nothing is permanent. She forgives all. Karma paid!
Everyone wants to be pleased, which is not wrong. One said that that is like throwing things to a bottomless hole, never ending craving for pleasure taken from others. It is ok to want to be pleased, but don’t suffer for not getting the pleasure that’s wanted.
Change the bottomless hole from a waste field to a mine; that way it would be found the precious experiences, appreciating what’s in and not focusing on what’s out.
Befriending with one’s self is the most challenging and at the same time most fun time. It is 24/7 for the rest of one’s life. Enjoy the ride.
Be kind to others but first of all be kind to yourself, Self.
Summary of a good chat with one best friend.
Name is a short spell. Not yours, Beloved. It’s mine Hanging in Heaven, Echoing after yours called. You can have it all.
How many names have you spelled in prayers? Are they the bold or the beautiful ones?
I call your name, Beloved ‘coz I know it infuses power into prayers like smoke of burnt incense billowing into the sky escorting dreams to meet the doors….
May all beings be happy….
Money, Beloved? Might not be. Prosperity: A bunch of blessings Earned with heart and soul, given Wholeheartedly. You should know.
Money is important, but it is not everything. Is it? Is it not?
A brand new day’s come With the breeze through the windows; With the morning sun; With your shadow, Beloved Who dances through my heart beats.
To those who have lost the trust of love…. There is always a brand new day, a brand new way.
May all beings be happy….
Perennial shrubs: Diehard under tough weather It’s her, Beloved. Don’t see her a rose. She be Hibiscus— cheap and no thorn....
🌺
Hidden trough of Soul, A home where letter and voice Are silent. Where’s that? Walk your orbit, Beloved. They know the way to that realm.
You are not lost, Self. You are tracing back a journey home of trillions years of light and so you might have forgotten what, who and when but you won’t forget how to walk on it. What you need to do is just don’t quit. Don’t ask why, the answer is too clear. How ugly it is now, know that wings are grown.
Singapore – Jan. 13, 2021 / 19:00
There’s not much to tell, Beloved. Let’s play it jazz ‘Coz we know the tunes. You’d sing the rhymes, Beloved? Or would you please read the rhythms?
No day will be 100% as expected. No one will be 100% as expected, either. And with those expected, we know that only with jazzy mood days and people can be handled without too much stress.
Nothing beats inner peace. And whether you know it or not, I wish you, Beloved a great time, too.
May all beings be happy.
Scents of the unknown Lingers in the air. Muguet: Earthy, green, floral— You’ve turned spark to fire burning Dreams to fuel a sweet journey.
All people love fragrance; not necessarily perfume but yes I’m talking about it.
Let’s agree that fragrance is one of the best gifts in life – I mean…. I am not naturally smelling like flowers, but I love nice air coming into my nostrils and celebrating the beauty of nature through one of the human’s senses. Don’t you?
At times when we are wearing perfumes, we’ll subconsciously reminisce moments featuring individuals that we might or might not clearly remember.
Lemongrass mostly reminds me to Ayutthaya. Jasmine connects to a place in Erawan, Bangkok. Frangipani brings Ubud back to memory. Rose to one factory in Vietnam. Lemon brings me to my humble abode in Greater Jakarta. Sandalwood to my mother who loves sandalwood. Lavender to my father whose pomade was lavender-based. And so on, and so forth.
Recently there came unknown scents that reminded me to some people. I was browsing perfumes, and trying certain fragrances, particular moments and faces struck me stealthily. Goodness! Now I captured them through various fragrances! Moments, faces and nuances intertwined in the liquid. The memories might have been traced and downloaded by our brain! Unknown scents have empirically proved to represent impression caught about someone.
I’m now liking lily of the valley or muguet scent because it reminds this person to a most beloved. I don’t think that person splashed muguet when meeting with me but he suits that attar. What an overestimation it is! It’s ok, he doesn’t know 😂
Recommended: Go for a new experience in perfumery and investigate what scents connect you to what moments or which individuals. You might find a way to get rid of bitter past and/or revive good spirits to be happy.
Guess I know why I can’t relate well to some people that’s why they are connected to certain aroma that I’m not fond of. Probably…. Or just my superstition….
One person’s favourite scents might not be others’ ones.
That’s life.
Singapore – Jan. 7, 2021 / 23:06
May all beings be happy.
Four-letter word, Love. I take love to deal with you. With full risk I know.
God talks about love. Religion talks about love. Many people refer to divinity and humanity.
Rumi talked about love. Ibn Arabi talked about love. People interpret their topic of love in wide spectrum: lustily physical, romantic, humanity, divinity — from the simple to the absurd. And it is always beautiful whatever the perspective is, as long as love becomes the foundation.
You can approach love from your own experience, the message is simply between Lover and Beloved. People may judge your message of love, but you are the truest judge to yourself….
From a seed of awe Grew secret admiration. Joy in painful hide Summed up by a flash farewell— I love you from where I am.
Love is actually personal experience that internally grows or flickers out based on the quality and responses. I find in my experience loving someone for many years without him knowing it until we took a farewell—he might only know he is special to me and not more; love grows but wisely stops expecting anything. Why expecting if you don’t even get the expected responses from the person and there is no entrance to learn more about the one that you love? Poor me? No, I’m lucky that love has tested me and I pass.
Yes, the most important thing is to test love, how true it is. What if your love isn’t intense anymore? How if the one you love doesn’t love you? How if you find your love evolves? All those rubbish absolutely happen. 😂
It is always good to talk about love. Love deserves a talk, in either low or high pitch, anger or soberness, silence or crowd, far or near, laze or excitement….
A bunch of roses Present flowers, leaves, stems, thorns— Where is the root, Love? It’s left in the heart, where growth Is truer and forever.
Yet for those who never contemplate or who don’t care, love is difficult to embrace and feel. The vibe can be so fake or vague without physical presence. They need definition of love, which can only degrade the quality of it. Just do….
What have I ranted about?
Too much for the last day of new year’s holiday but too good to be unsaid to start very good years ahead!
I send my best regards to you across the ocean. Happy and Healthy New Year! I love you from where I am.
May all beings be happy.
Singapore – January 4, 2021 – last day of holiday / 14:10
Rains talk about it: What is and is not; unique, Comprehensive Self. Woven with thousands of threads, Dyed in thousands of colours—
It’s about you, Beloved…. You that is understood and at the same time misunderstood….
May all beings be happy.
