Rebirth, Beloved, Rose budding after winter, Welcoming her spring
A long lost friend texted me yesterday and asked if I could accompany her to buy sari and some Indian accessories for Deepavali Day celebration in the school where she is now working. Of course I made myself available. And we agreed to meet in Little India at 6pm which I missed. We both met at 6:30pm.
This friend was gone as if evaporating in 2017. Contacted, no reply, not even delivered. My last message to her in 2019 was “Are you still alive?”
Out of the blue she texted me using a new number in 2020 “How are you, friend? I miss you. Let’s meet up.” We were supposed to meet in October 2020 but never happened.
It was a cool rendezvous! We browsed the market to find the most beautiful yet the cheapest sets of costumes for the will-be-merry celebration.
At 9pm we decided to enjoy our dinner in one Indian restaurant before going home. And there she told me why she didn’t meet anyone of us. Now I become more and more convinced that the brightest person can have the darkest time in life. Luckily there’s a light at the end of the darkest tunnel if one is willing to move forward, not quitting.
We’ve been born as a human baby; and we can be reborn as anything good if we want to. One of the best is to be reborn as a new hope with good friends around!
Birthday, Beloved, One step closer to the gate To a rendezvous
It’s my mother’s 77th birthday and she looked so happy when I called through my little brother’s phone. A happy day for all of us finding that she’s still happy and healthy in this age.
She’s a lady of the house. She’s respected by family and neighbours because of her kindness. She’s cheated though by the greed. She’s loved by her children at the same time official enemy of all of them at certain time. I personally have a shade of rivalry against her, she did envy me how I would be closed with and always got constant support from my father. 😂
My friends want to be like her but I don’t. I don’t want to be like her because her life was too tough. She was born in a period of war, raised mostly without a father and be given a lot of ups and downs in her personal journey. Lucky that she was married to a humble, kind, hard working man and they became one of the best couples in our humble world.
Happy birthday, Ibu. I wish you happiness. 💝 Long happy life! See you at our dining table on your 78th birthday. 😘😘😘😘😘😘
Green hedge keeps growing. It’s beauty and protection, Keeping bugs away.
Some boundary should be set. Yes, it should. In certain situation it becomes a must.
When I was young, I used to think friendship ought to be taken for granted. This person’s young eyes were not sharp enough to recognise which was pure gold and which was gold-plated. Manipulation was never known by this mental dictionary. All smiles and good words were the same to me, they meant kindness.
After knowing what gold is, now it is clearer who should play in my garden of life a little bit deeper as real friends, those who can safe-keep more information about this precious journey. My smiles and good heart are free of charge for everyone, but beautiful green hedge with a humble strong gate will select who can enter the gate then the front door then living room then library then dining room then kitchen or finally to my bedroom. Not all are allowed to stay in for too long with privileges. Some couriers of messages or packages can only stay for one minute or two for the delivery then off they should go!
Boundary is not necessarily a fort. Beautiful plants around this home should be clearly understood that permission is required for guests to enter the premises.
I know when people don’t want me in their circle and that’s fine. So, I hope people know that my green hedge is the limit. Stepping on the line means violation and security alarm will go off.
Stop there, dear friends. Fix yourself before fixing others. Your experiences are not needed here. 😸
Where is the kitchen, Dear? Done; now dining area— Let’s dine together.
Some discussion is naturally heating and escalating. And a recent one with some friends was one of them.
Started with questions of why do those people do this and that in the name of religions? What do you think about what happen in those countries?
“Perhaps none of the things in a religion is wrong. It is the interpretation of the script, interpretation is product of thinking that can be wrong or inappropriate. Many religious people rigidly think that only their interpretation is the truth. Only they can go to heaven. They behave as if they are the committee of heaven who decide who can enter the gate. They claim this and that. They don’t give space to others to present different opinions. For example the dark face of Islam nowadays is because of the image given based on how the Holy Quran is interpreted and presented by popular groups (minor percentage unfortunately) and it might not be the real teaching.
That religious interpretation has not built in vacuum chamber. It’s been loaded with political interests and competitions among scholars who have had different thinkings and interests based on whatever their strongest points at a certain time. Things have not been purely and objectively dedicated to the welfare and safety of ummah (people). It’s been always power and money.”
To me religion is a kitchen where a host optimises cooking skills and high standards of all ingredients and processes; attitude is a dining area where the host serves the best food to the guests with kindness and respect. I harvested this wisdom from a Javanese elder years ago and since then stopped religion discussion with those who only want to create tension or force belief to me.
Acceptance that truth is layered (personal, shared/agree, absolute) and should be respected is now my standpoint. Institutional religion is not my interest anymore. All religions are unbroken chains of stages of human beings’ ethical values development on earth.
Personal truth is what one believes with all the concoction of what one holds based on one’s understanding and experiences. In this layer religions can be very private and unique, based on how one has been raised since one was fetus up to now. My truth might not be yours and the vice versa.
Shared/agreed truth is agreements about things. This agreement becomes what are believed and strived by a group of individuals be it friendship, society, organization, sect, country, etc. In this layer religions might be used (even abused) to be commodity to drive policy and power; or institution to build boundary and authority.
Absolute truth is the core truth, no bias no spectrum, the vacuum chamber. In this layer religion might be nothing but a concept misunderstood, misinterpreted, mistreated, misused by many human beings. This absoluteness never belongs to any creatures on earth even Prophets, Messengers or Saints. It is the privilege of The One who might have been misunderstood by every single believer or thinker or whoever on earth. The One will only give signs and symbols in order for human beings to clarify and verify the truth. The One gives all tangible and intangible senses as tools to decipher the signs and symbols; however, The One lets the creatures decide how the senses are used— whether the tools are well kept and calibrated to work well, it is up to them.
I don’t worry about how I practice religion. What those people think about a religion might be not right at all; of course I might be wrong either.
The Prophet said “I was sent to uphold and complement ethical values.”
How could a group of people claim they do the right interpretation of the religion by doing unethical things? Discrimination, harassment, abuse, killing, stealing (corruption included), cheating (manipulation included), etc…. Is this the right thing as what the Prophet did teach about ethical values?
I guessed not. Now I don’t believe so and I don’t think so. Sadly many read text without context— jokingly intelligent.
Some days are tough when questions about religion bother.
I’m sorry, dear friends. I can’t always agree with you.
Canna, you’re a maze. An intricate bright beauty— May I have jasmine?
Some people behave like a maze alive. While impressing others with beautiful look, fascinating sweetness, deathly charms; they often hide the truest true.
Perhaps they are not ready with vulnerability as a result of experiences of untrue relationships. Or, the worst scenario is they have hidden agenda.
While it works wonder in literary or art (some authors or artists want anonymity or pseudonymity, and their works are better sold), it won’t work in friendship. It will be a total failure to some extent.
What are people trying to hide from those called closest friends…. if at the end the untruthfulness stops the friendship from functioning well? Why should ones be pretending?
To someone who is being forced by life for a seclusion: Please be strong and learn to be vulnerably honest about yourself to your own self. Wish you the best of the best. You’re a butterfly in the making. 💝
Do you want to know, Beloved? He’s an Angel, Outcasted. Fallen Of jealousy, arrogance. So is your pride, Beloved?
I was sitting on my bike checking the left side of AirPods that was not well connected and so lost the audio when someone stopped by and asked,”Are you lost? What way are you trying to find?”
“Oh no, no, no. I’m checking my audio.”
“Oh, I thought you’re lost ha… See map or what haha”
“No, no. Thank you, thank you, Uncle!”
His question “are you lost” reminded me to one who used to live in an exquisitely designed place called heaven and because of losing one’s clear thinking, one was outcasted. One became incompatible with one’s original position.
Who is that one? Those who read religious history of human creation might know, yet I’m not interested to think of the individual. One’s characters, actions and the implication become more relevant to ponder in my situation at that time.
And it calmed me down.
Sometimes losing pride is so significant to a human being. Sometimes failure to show one’s dignity or ability becomes the core of the day. Others’ perception has overridden the real importance of a success itself, or an action. In that situation someone can turn into a jealous, arrogant, irrational who thinks of two: fight or flight, while one should simply stay calm and collected.
Underestimation or humiliation if accepted positively might be simply inability to perceive what is or misunderstanding of self love. In short only those without knowledge and love will underestimate or humiliate others.
Why should I be upset? What a waste!
I don’t want to outcast my own self from the beauty of being a human being just because of forgetting who this person really is. Forget about jobs or credentials; both are not significant when alone meeting with one’s self.
I don’t want to ignore what’s happening inside just because of my own or others’ perceptions. Let them say I’m low; I’m not low although I’m never high. Let them say I’m nothing; I’m not nothing although I’m nobody. Let them say I’m meaningless; I’m not meaningless although I don’t mean to be the most meaningful of all.
Oh Lord, thanks for sending me an old wise man to show the other side of a coin.
Thanks for making me a human being so I won’t live forever outcasted in arrogance and jealousy.
Dear, Arrogance. Dear, Jealousy. Although not forever, you are still living here now comfortably. Be tamed for me.
Blessings, Beloved, Accepting with no review— See it differently.
Today’s short message from a wise friend takes one of the longest thought. Lucky me for being alone so the time and space is serving just me.
Sometimes our emotion isn’t our emotion. It might be someone else’s that sits in us because some people entrust the emotions to us when sharing their burden to us. Believe it or not there is exchange of energy when beings are interacting with each other. We get sad when our family is sad. We are upset when our best friends are betrayed. We can be devastated when our pets pass away. The scale of the impact depends on how deeply they get hurt and/or how vulnerable we are to them. As simple as that.
When I asked this good friend why people or incidents are not avoidable although I’ve made best effort to stay away. Her message is “karma”. She is a Buddhist so that reply is her logical response. Besides I see the logic of karma thing.
Although I can’t tangibly prove that I live repeated lives, I live in karma system. If I do good, I get good. I do no good, I get no good. Simple and straightforward forward— whether the cause is the good one in the past affecting the current situation; or the present good deed affecting the future (not necessarily related to repeated life), that’s a certainty
But why the karma isn’t working as one to one? No, karma works like someone who plants mango seed – one mango seed will only give its fruits when it’s ready and the one seed will give the farmer hundreds of mango fruits. That karma. Alamak….!
So what should I do, Bude? I asked my friend.
Her message (translated into English word by word): that is your task of compassion.
Accept it. Grow more good seeds that bad one. Pour clean water to your jug that is filled with dirty water until the jug is overflown with clean water and the dirty is flushed out.
So I can’t avoid them and don’t need to avoid them. The only thing I should do is to accept them without review. The only mandatory review is to my own emotions; understanding whether the emotion is my emotion or unnecessary impact that happens because of weak protection membrane around my own self.
This is not new thing for all of us. Yet 2020 and 2021 have been field of emotional battle in which I’ve learnt how to identify my own and others’. What a period! I wish all is getting better with the upcoming birthday. Amen.
So lucky to have good friends who are willing to accompany me in this journey.
Dear God, love me and love all my good friends. Thank you for giving the blessings of friendship, true one with true one. Please let me stay in the true one.
Time flies, Beloved Wraps a flying plane. Bless me At my travel end.
Finally met my Sensei again after some time! In June I took a break because of some sickness and work. In July and early August she did because she had to take care of her family who were infected with the virus.
We didn’t open the book at all last night. Only a happy reunion checking what had happened for the past 2.5 months without meeting just some hello via messaging. Conversation flew about language, culture and personal experience dealing with both.
At one point she interestingly described about pleasure and purpose that compose happiness.
She decided to retire from her position as a VIP in one of the biggest business empire in the world before she was 40. She knew that she could not work forever and she wanted her own self not her age to decide when she had to quit. She thought she was ready and here she is now, an independent woman with a lot of personal projects and teaching Japanese with a style!
When she worked, she did with all her heart. She didn’t involve herself in office politics that made her not a social darling but definitely made her a genuine and independent loyal. She made decision with wisdom and integrity that made her a leader-maker but at the same time a strong gate of ethics. And she shined in her own way!
A sun is a sun when it knows when it rises and sets. And my Sensei is one.
She said it was a pleasure to work in her position with much luxury but she left because she didn’t see the real purpose she was serving. She was rich but true happiness was missed. She moved out from her luxurious apartment in the heart of Jakarta and rent it out, and moved to her mother’s home – a home full with flowers and good neighbours in East Jakarta. She restarted balancing pleasure and purpose.
Pleasure makes someone’s life sustain but without purpose there is no true sustainability. When one outgrows the other, happiness tank isn’t optimised. Pleasure and purpose is also a blend of colours that creates a perfect hue.
When I said whether she was afraid of losing the grip for having no routine, she said yes for the first two months of her early retirement; she felt somewhat regret of giving up the corporate vibe. She felt like cutting herself off from the world. In those two months she just went out eating, driving, cleaning the house. And after that her life started to bloom in different ways.
She found many more opportunities that she didn’t even know existing. And she is still rich with more leisure time and true friends. She said life is miracle.
Before pandemic she often traveled to smaller islands in the archipelago as a volunteer and annually visited Japan as her old habit. She said she wants to continue that after the pandemic is over, when Heaven knows.
When I said I wish I could do it, she said no. She said what I’m doing is what she dreamt of in corporate life before: having the pleasure of working with purpose. Conversation went more even livelier, we skipped the Japanese lesson and shared about our dreams. A more interesting class!
Last night was one of the great time in life when the feeling of balance surrounds me.
It was 1:07am when we finally said good bye. See you next week, Sensei! Thanks for the lessons.
Life is full of Teachers. Learn from them. But don’t forget the Master in you, live with one with love.
Good vibes, Beloved, Contagious and precious Keep it the longest.
Years ago….. One teacher said “You do whatever you want to, but make sure what you do doesn’t harm….” Impatiently student asked,”Harmful to whom?” Teacher didn’t say anything, just pointed to one’s chest then head, and said “Go play and don’t harm yourself or your friends. Have fun, you’re good. You’re good, my child,”
Another teacher would just sang some traditional songs then explained the meaning that were full of wisdom when asked questions. Those silly children would ask so many questions about why religions were many and different, how many gods were there, why the teacher didn’t have religion, why, why, why…..
Another teacher just asked us to eat what one was cooking when we asked questions. We just did and enjoyed the food. It happened when our questions were about what Mr A or Mrs B did this and that for.
More teachers, more experiences…. And we all grew up becoming human beings who approach different things differently or sometimes uniquely although sometimes confusedly. How challenging life is sometimes!
All those learnings happened in the Wonderland! I hope the young get honourable and good teachers as we did before and even better so they build our land into real wonder! Not the most developed in infrastructure, yet with the most developed clear thinking. Not the most modern, yet the most dignified. Not the richest, yet the most caring and loving to the people. What a dream!
Secret, Beloved Ice cube waiting for warm touch— Melts and flows: a stream Of messages from the heart. Read or heard of. Clean and clear—
No secret, it’s exposure or disclosure in the right place at the right time. I believe life is somewhat designed WYSIWYG for those willing to see life as it is. What you see (should be) is what you get.
Private is about level of security one is living. One day things will be exposed and forgiven or glorified.
Confidential is about secret recipe. One day things will get disclosed and comprehended and copied.
As simple as that. I’ve got no secret hidden. It is just about time for you to know. Either you’ll hate me or hate yourself; OR love me or love yourself for knowing “the secrets”.
Long life, Beloved, A postponed beauty each time Sad news knocks the door—
Just two years ago a best friend of mine told me to stay safe living away from nuclear family. Just two days ago his name started to be a memory. Rest In Peace. You’ve been a best friend and family member. See you again. 💞💐
Long life is a beautiful dream of many. Yet what is a beautiful dream when faced with a reality that the dream might drop out anytime with no notice or sign?
If life should be shorter than expected, I hope the end meets with the point of no regret. That would suffice.
August, Beloved Earth is thirsty and open. Second crop should come.
Pranata mangsa literally means season (mangsa) rules (pranata). It is a structured rules for farmers and fishermen in Javanese culture with which they make their plans in growing plants and harvesting the sea. This comprehension was also implemented in Sundanese (major ethnic group in West Java) and Balinese (major ethnic group in Bali). Some European ethnic groups did have this, too like Bauern calendar in Germany.
There are 12 mangsa (seasonal cycles) in Javanese pranata mangsa.
Kasa (Kartika) – Jun. 22 to Aug. 1
Karo (Poso) – Aug. 2-24
Katelu – Aug. 25 to Sep. 17
Kapat (Sitra) – Sep. 18 to Oct. 12
Kalima (Manggala) – Oct. 13 to Nov. 8
Kanem (Naya) – Nov. 9 to Dec. 21
Kapitu (Palguna) – Dec. 22 to Feb. 2
Kawolu (Wasika) – Feb. 3-28
Kasanga (Jita) – Mar. 1-25
Kasadasa (Srawana) – Mar. 26 to Apr. 18
Dhesta (Pradawana) – Apr. 19 to May 11
Sadha (Asuji) – May 12 to Jun. 21
The dates are adjusted every four years due to the 365 and 366 days in a year (leap year).
Javanese would grow certain seeds in each mangsa because in those particular mangsa the earth metabolism have specifically different characteristics suit certain plants to grow; and so, growing them will both maximise the crops and mitigate hazards to the soil.
And the Javanese fishermen would go to sea on certain mangsa and wouldn’t in the others or if they went, they knew which directions they would go as in certain parts of sea is in rage or the sea habitat isn’t ready to present crops to the men. Combined with the ethnoastronomy, the pranata mangsa was a powerful tool for Javanese fishermen in their golden era. No more though 🥴
Pranata mangsa was developed to ensure the health, safety and welfare of both the human beings and the environment. That’s confirmed and proven for ages!
However, this powerful pranata mangsa has been left if not forgotten by the owner. Instead the owner has started using the modern no-season farming and fishery where earth is raped and tortured to cater for the human being greed. The Javanese have betrayed both their own identity and the environment by leaving the pranata mangsa.
Do we really need so much? Or do we want so much?
Maybe it has come to a time to apologise to the earth goddess (called Batari Sri in Javanese, the one given authority by God to take care of soil) and the ocean god (called Batara Baruna in Javanese, the one given authority to take care of water)— they might have screamed for so long because of us, we who don’t care of the risks of harmful fertilisers and irresponsible sea harvesting both to us and to the earth.
Maybe it has come to a time to start healing them that are almost broken and exploding, and healing ourselves for having been greedy and selfish.
Burns. Hot. Fast. Deadly. Don't play
Until you are friends.
Even fire can be our friend and play with us. Make sure it doesn’t burn us. How? Either be water or earth when getting along with fire, never be wood or metal.
I’ve seen how anger consumes human beings’ life. It is not easy dealing with it, especially when it is inside. Yet is anger really an anger? Or just sadness, fear or unhappiness that are expressed inappropriately due to restriction in certain society?
Or, some people don’t even know that they are in rage. They don’t know what they are feeling. What they know is they feel annoyed, humiliated, or frustrated. Been there…. 🤓
When it is unbearable, go to the park and lie down on the grass or take ablution or take a bath.
Gosh! It is no easy to deal with an angry cashier or taxi driver. Hope they solve their real problems soon and be happy so people around them are not victimised, including the customers.
May all beings be happy esp those cashier and taxi driver. 💐
We are all born naked Dressed differently in death. What— Would we do in life?
Would keep laughing at myself in life because there are many comic moments in life (tragedy + time = comedy) — like being born every time, nakedly honest in front of own self
And would love to live around those who can see wisdom from what we’ve laughed at or jokes in wisdom— pure laughter, no humiliation, no underestimation, but yeah sweet insult 🤪
Can’t imagine how boring to live with those who can’t even laugh seeing their face on the mirror…. 🥳
Can’t wait to meet my best people and laugh at this life, accompanied with home made snacks and favourite drinks! Wisdom, jokes, social politic gossip and some stupid “garing” guessing games as always 🤓
Time is relative so next year can feel like one hour from now!
Friendship, Beloved A vast ocean and its waves Sweeping all debris—
A friend visited me at my lunch break. A short talk made the day.
About her retirement plan to hop from one city to another from one country to another with her husband, future visit to my home base, future visit to Ubud, her sons and the menace, my future plans, health and healthcare, vaccination, and everything….
Our longest talk after 2 years of not going someplace together! She brought our favourite kue from Bengawan Solo! 💝
Couldn’t believe it could happen only in one hour. We must have talked as fast as flash!
Time runs, Beloved Not flies. Its feet touch the ground, Planting you deeply To the journey. Feel the pace, Beloved. The end is good.
Today’s video call with 6 best friends was at least 2 hours of stupidity in the brink of wisdom.
The talk of health of some of us and overall healthcare in our country has become both joke and contemplation.
One of us said that as a father of two he doesn’t want to be selfish thinking about his health too much. He wants to give the best to his children and if he has to leave them forever, his family won’t suffer of having too little. This oldest of all of us is always the funniest yet the wisest.
One of us said that whatever medical complaints she has, she wants to handle them now. She said she’d better know the diseases how much ever bad they are and do possible treatments soon rather than later when she is older. What a good anticipation!
Another said that he still enjoys everything freely. He called while chewing donuts with heavy chocolate and sugar toppings! What a joy!
Most of us don’t have serious medical issues except that the pandemic in the country is more happening that fear of it is more deadly than the virus itself.
Blahblahblah and hahaha continued when we talked about religions. Those who are religious made fun of us who are “not clear”. And we teased them who are “too clear-cut”.
Fun 2+ hours! Mood booster to welcome another week!
Hope we are all completing everything well.
Take care, crazy good friends! You’re blessed.
Sure we’ll still meet again in a better time! So sure!