You? Where, Beloved?
The omnipresent through air,
Undefined calmnessβ
Breeze that caresses the leaves.
Breath that blows prayer for you.
β-
π£
Tag: heart
Spread of The Day
A wise teacher said:
If you have a space for shelter,
A plate of rice for meal,
A job for a living;
Thatβs when youβre blessed.
I couldnβt say a word
To deny.
Itβs true
And
Only true.
β-
Enjoy!
Different Days for One Date
I learn
Life is about counting gates of moments.
Itβs not what I celebrate,
Itβs how I celebrate.
They call it this,
I call it that,
Itβs a day dyed with red, blue, yellow
Yet
Really the day wonβt describe its own color when asked.
One more day to celebrate!
β-
Itβs not unusual Ramadhan is closed on different days by different groups of Muslim esp. in big country like Indonesia. One group may close Ramadhan on 29th day, the other on 30th. Itβs not a big deal (although some noisy people like to debate about it) but itβs not simple things to explain. Overall the difference is due to 2 different methods of seeing the crescent moon visibility in the horizon – one group is using mathematical astronomy (computation), the other physical observation (telescope).
This year most of my family in Indonesia celebrated the Eid yesterday, I in Singapore today.
Without further adoβ¦.
Celebrate moments that are given in life including this festivity. Every moment is a gate to another moment before entering the next gate of moment. After entering Ramadhan gate, now Syawal gate, whatβs next? Any should be simply a gate to start or to restart or to continue.
Gate after gate before finally the grandest gate β©
once moreβ¦
Selamat Hari Raya Idul Fitri 1443H
History of A Tree
You have to believe
Nature lives with you, ruling
Games in which you are.
See colours. Watch shapes. Seasons,
Patterns count the scores to make.
Fruits rot. Flowers sere.
Leaves fall. Trunks topple. Roots die.
This plant is a name
In encyclopaedia,
Memory of its climbers.
ββ-
This body has expiry date. Iβm seeing it deteriorates in time. What will be something of me left behind?
Temasek, Ramadhan 11 / 5:55am
Ribbons With Messages
There is a crystal clear ribbon
Flying through a cavity
Bringing a message
About love
To whom
I say
βThis painting is made for you from the first stroke to the last dot in the artistβs signature.β
Iβm mixing colours to find the best hue to paint you.
Iβm balancing the real and unreal to find the vibe of you.
Iβm panning my own work to find if this is truly a gift or stolen relic from you.
I keep these hands engraving
But eyes focusing on you.
All to find you.
And every second I can see myself reading another message on another ribbon:
βIs this a hide-and-seek?
Or simply a peek-a-boo?β
Ahh! You maybe only smile, enjoying the scene of how funny this could be.
ββββββ
Journey Of The Nights
Up and down the hills
The feet walk, the heart stands still.
Journey of the nightsβ
βββββββββββββββββββ
Nights and days are the consequences of sun and moon fixed courses. Or is it the other way around: sun and moon fixed courses are existing due to the need of nights and days in this particular planet.
Many say day is for activities, night is for resting. I donβt deny but I have my own interpretation of activities and resting. Activity is when all my concentration is for transactional economy, resting is when my concentration is for relaxation and personal. Rest day? Of course all my rest days will become nights. π
Thanks for giving me days and nights.
May all beings be happyβ£οΈ
Mask Is, Smile Is
Smile is a good mask
Than a mask can be. A mask
Masks a masking smile.
What masks a mask? Or who does?
Unmask! A soul has missed you.
ββββββββββββββββββββ-
Sometimes she doesnβt know why she feels a blissful joy. She tries her best to find a reason but seems to fail. When people ask why she looks radiant on certain day, she will just say I love the food, I love the weather, I love this, I love that β simply for courtesy with a bit of honesty compromised due to inability to give exact reason.
Perhaps the reason is because the footprints of falling in love is greater than the scars of broken heart. Alas! It might not be. Or, it might be. Come on, it might not be. Ah! Thatβs not important.
Oh? She doesnβt know. And it is ok to feel that way – blissfully joyful with unknown reason like when she is falling in love, unreasonable β her love did go to that that she never ever thought of getting on the way then suddenly gone away.
Tragic comedy! π
β£οΈ
Dreamy Days
Red leaves, Beloved
Gracefully fall on the lap
Of Mother Nature,
Garnishing coloured autumn
Welcoming benign winter.
Dream, dream, Beloved.
As vibrant as you wish to,
As sweet as you want.
Youβre red leaves lightheartedly
Flying decorating life.
βββββββββββββββββββββ
I wish all my good dreams come true. And all of yours, too ππΌ
Salam.
The Choice To Bloom
Even though theyβre weed,
Theyβre flower, ready to bloom.
Truly as they are.
βββββββββββββββββββ
Respect each other as all of us have become us with no choice but traveling the paths weβve agreed to sign up. Early termination doesnβt apply; life is about starting and completing whatβs written.
Respect each other. At leastβ¦.
π
Words
I know, Beloved,
Those words are leaves falling down,
Decayed before you.
βββββββββββββββββββββ
Jika kita lahir dan tumbuh sebagai kata-kata,
saya akan selalu menggarisbawahi kamu
seperti kata yang saya anggap penting,
meski kamu nanti mencetak miring saya
seperti kata yang tak dikenal dan asing. (part of a poem by Adimas Immanuel)
Banana Tree
Live once, no regret,
Said banana trees. They die
After giving fruits.
ββββββββββββββββββ
Alone
Go solo travel
Through blocked road, dead end
With fright, thirst and hope!
Trees will tell you where to go.
Sun will tell you when to halt.
βββββββββββββββββββββ
I (almost) always travel alone and I love it. It is not only business trip but also travel for leisure.
My first impressive adventurous solo travel was at 12 with my red mini bike. I would bike from home to my uncleβs home in a hilly district. It was about one hour ride of 7 kilometers away excluding all the U turns of getting lost in quite rough terrain in the route. I was excited doing it though because of nieces and nephews waiting to play with and the agriculture experience to enjoy. The up-hill biking to uncleβs home was my private getaway until my little brother insisted joining.
Another impressive solo travel of mine was in Bandar Lampung where I visited elephant and rhino conservation centres. Unfortunately the sweet young me was still innocent that people thought I was welcoming them; and I got sexual-physically harassed. Lucky me to be saved by a bus driver β wherever you are (maybe you away already because you looked like 60 years old when I was 26), you are blessed, Pak Supir!
And the excitement of the first impressive solo travel and the most dangerous one have combined to be a sufficient foundation for me to be a 99% solo traveler until now.
Traveling solo, I learn and improve how to cope with life challenges: languages, culture, human behaviour, security, etc. Yet I can enjoy the trips as I wish without having to wait for others moving slower or having to be dragged by others moving faster. It is almost always about excitement, freedom and privacy!
The bravest trip of mine was to Bangladesh in 2011. Plane touched down at 12am. Taxi waited in a corner that will be considered dangerous spot by any normal women on earth. Hotel was totally different from what was described online. Food was a bit below my hygiene par but I had to show my respect by eating with (fake) happy look! Yet I was truly happy to meet 3 new friends who hosted me with genuine hospitality (no fakey smiley like in some countries on earth I wonβt mention); they brought me to city parks, mosques, slum areas, high end areas, etc in Dhaka. That was one paradoxically the happiest-saddest trip where I met the most skinny dogs and poor people right in front of luxurious houses. The most teary nights ever!
My smoothest, most expensive was 20-day solo travel in Europe: expensive flights, flights between countries, 1st class trains between cities and countries, taxi rides, good hotels, accessible public facilities, drinkable water free of charge!, good choices of foodβ¦. very little warm smile though. My favourite cities are still Amsterdam with so many Indonesians that warmed my soul and Madrid with so many handsome men that freshened my eyes! π
Do I still want to travel alone? YES! but not 99% anymore, maybe will be 75%. I have a small group of semi-backpacker ladies who will be best neighbours when I retire. So they might be my travel buddies when I want to share some itinerary with.
I miss traveling!!!
Next destination? I donβt knowβ¦. The virus has evolved from physical barrier to physio-socio-psycho-political block for me to move around! God bless you, dear Corona.
Happy Sunday home! Salaam. π
Aging
Aging, Beloved,
Counting blessings everydayβ
Feeling challenging?
ββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ
Sometimes a challenge or deadline is needed like fertiliser sprinkled on to the soil to trigger more chemical, biological, physical reactions from the root dancing in the ground to go deeper and healthier so that the tree grows even stronger and taller.
ι εΌ΅γγΎγγγοΌ
Taste
The taste, Beloved,
Touches life in every point.
No excuse for herβ
ββββββββββββββββββββ
Sometimes life is about experiencing spiciness level, low to high level. Sweet is hiding for a while, it will come another day.
Thatβs some of my conversation with my Sensei in todayβs Japanese class.
Hell yeah! β‘οΈ
I Trust You
Know not, Beloved
This path about to end when
And where. I trust you.
ββββββββββββββββββ-
Trust is what sheβs been holding tight because without it sheβs lost the grip against so much magnetic force around that will pull her into a gaping hole, where greediness can consume anyone till no end.
Thanks, Beloved, for giving me a life thatβs imperfect but perfectly humbling me in many ways.
I trust You; voluntarily or forcefully.
π
The Director
Her life, Beloved,
Perfectly-directed film
Ready for Oscarsβ
ββββββββββββββββ
She sometimes forgets that life is a performed script in which she is casted to act out a given role the best she can. She should follow the directorβs direction and directive.
What about spectators? She should ignore spectators. Spectators are stars whose job is to see and comment on the film. And they pay for what they see and comment. The payment goes to the stars!
So, dear Star. Fix your moves. Better your expression. Tag your ears with the melody. Live in harmony, with your own self like Javanese Bedhaya performers who are meditatively drowned in the sacred composition.
Oscars are waiting.β¦
β¦. Only if you play all out!
Heart and soul dancing through body π
Alhamdulillah π»
Perfect Combination
Loveβs yellow on green,
Sprinkling ripeness on freshness.
Pack your smile for me.
βββββββββββββββββββββ
πππ
Disclosure
Seed deeply buried,
Grown finding the sun slowlyβ
It is about time.
ββββββββββββββββββ
Good life was once tiny little secret longing for forgiveness and blessings.
I accept my history, present and future.
May all beings be happy. π
Cycled
After the moon? No.
The sun is where this heart walks
With rain that visits.
βββββββββββββββββββββ
Chasing whatβs not clear and uncertain was an exciting thing for the hot-blooded. Dark, shadowy picture of what she once imagined has started fading away. The moonβs shift is over.
Walking in this forest, the leaves has rekindled her faith that rain is paying a short visit. When the rain stops, she will again realise that her heart is always enveloped in the warmth of clarity.
Sunbeam always opens a new chapter in which sunshine will take over whatβs mysterious and frightening. Light will help her eyes see things the way they are, no assumption, no prejudice. It is what it is.
When she reaches the edge of the forest, she will step on a meadow where the moon is again sending shadow but this time there is no mystery anymore.
All is clear. All is well. What it takes is just counting the milestones and blessing all that are sensed.
May all beings be happy.
Madly In Love
Was madly in love,
Still amβ¦. Realm is the limit.
β¦. With you, Belovedβ
βββββββββββββββββββββ
Where is the end of love journey? Either hopelessness or time π
Alfatihah π
rike jokanan 
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