It’s All About Becoming

Magic, Beloved,
Not just spells. It’s click and twist
Within time and space.

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I thought magic was a split second materialisation of what were wished. Years ago I believed that The Most Powerful would make things in just a blink of an eye. With millions of disclosure and exposure, magical things have become something natural. Everything can be interpreted as miracle as much as it can be considered ordinary.

Magic is a mechanisation in the universe in which processes and timelines cannot be denied. Sooner or later….

May all beings be happy.

Setting

Free Day

Rest day, Beloved,
Free— Stay away from workplace.
Let it be messy.

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Just wanna be free, don’t care about dirty house and all the mess. Just wanna take time to do nothing—

Welcome Saturday night! Let’s browse recipe for Sunday! 😎

leaving weekend as weekend, without touching anything at that corner

Attributing You

How perfect you are,
99.
I’m the 1 completing the reality.
And so we are completed,
100!

Life is blessed when the heart is loaded and bedazzled with three gemstones of the beautiful names and attributes of God: the amethyst of Ar-Rahman (the beneficent), the emerald of Ar-Rahiem (the merciful) and the rose quartz of Al-Latif (the subtle one, the most gentle).

It’s a personal interpretation; don’t quote me.

People say that the quality of God can’t be bounded with the beauty of any but at the same time it can in order to attribute God with something sensuously beautiful at the same time symbolising some characters. I chose gemstone. Why not flowers, why gemstones? Let it be

The three qualities are those projected to be. Someday —not sure when— I’ll acceptably be. Not sure when….

Enchanting those three attributes without thinking what religions I’m holding has been helpful to cope with many challenges especially facing those contesting and/or underestimating. Forgive them, love them and keep gentle in the heart— how much ever tough the argument is, be gentle in the heart; how much ever confrontation to be tackled, be gentle in the heart; how much ever firm intonation to be uttered, be gentle in the heart. At the end it is not winning an argument that’s important; it is accepting the learning process the bounties. Gorgeous and precious as gemstones—

So thankful to be a human being, being able to wildly interpret what might be rigidly believed by others, being able to move meaning from where beauty is rigidly defined to wherever a defined beauty can be criticised. That’s a privilege only for those who have enough space for being humane — take learning step, one by one….

In this crowded world, the safest sanctuary is being one’s self where those that I know don’t really care and those that I care don’t really know.

May I have another gemstone? 🤨

May all beings be happy….

counting the blessings – thanks for everything.

Nuts!

Nuts ‘bout you she is,
Doesn’t mind if you know not.
Beautifully wrapped
By the hard shell from nature;
Sweetly tasted in silence—

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Life is uniquely designed to be experienced differently to taste the same reality. This sweet is that sweet and it is called sweet….

….with spectrum of sweetness spread from zero to infinity

Is that?

a ramekin of nuts – crunchy, sweet, hard-shelled, softly-textured

A Tree, A Friend

Dear tree, wait for her.
She’s caught up but will come back
To give you big hug.
Not that you miss her hugging.
It’s she missing your stillness.

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Some friends are so loyal that they still touch your heart even without talking to you.

Thanks to a friend from a distance for her humble wisdom every now and then, for inspiring me silently….

a friend happily inspires one’s friends silently 🙏🏼

Scenery, A Beauty That Prisons

Where are you, oh dear?
Mountains and oceans are passed
By with beauty glued
As memory. Beloved,
Where’s the next stop? Peek a boo!

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When I was young; I joined spiritual workshop, class, training; read spiritual books, journal, articles; listened to spiritual preaching, cassettes, radio programs; name more —mostly informal, some non-formal, one formal not finished oh I’m blessed that It wasn’t. Whenever I was asked why I did, I would say “I wanna know God.”

Hopeless popus!*

Has anyone experienced this looking-sophisticated-but-actually-comical thing? Thanks God (s/he’d like to be censored actually) I’m not alone in this zero to zigzagging journey— from being very excitedly curious to being a drunken master. 🤪

What a blessed journey it was!
If I’m supposed to tell that young me when starting through the reading of those looking-sophisticated-yet-actually-comical random materials, I would say “Hey, Lady Haha! You should have a map but a destination is paramount!”

And I still feel so blessed!

May all haha moments be deciphered. 😊

* refer to the video of “How To Dad” in “How To Teach A Kid Curse Words”.

a pinch of salt to my life, no pepper though

Beautiful Scars

Bruised and scarred she is;
A stained-glass window to see
Both sides of her world.

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22:22 / Sunday – June 6, 2021

I thought all of those were wounds and warts until observing carefully. I’ve been living with a beautiful stained-glass window which puts colours and gives unique perspectives when seeing inside and outside. As long as it doesn’t derail from being a human being, I think I’m blessed.

Why shouldn’t I be thankful and happy? 💞

And….

May all beings be happy.

Salam.

Millions of Dreams

Where to go? Let’s go!
River never knows but flows.
This is estuary,
Beloved, sea welcomes you.
Black to blue is true. Slow down....

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One of my best friends is flying to Bali this morning. She’ll live in her most favourite island for how long only Heaven knows.

We knew she has dreamt of living in Ubud without knowing how to materialise it as she’s a full time employee in Jakarta and her job requires her to sit in front of her computer for 8 hours a day 5 days a week. Bali was just a holiday or weekend escapade that helps refresh before going back to the busy metropolis.

We had a 3-hour call last night, celebrating her flight to her paradise! She’s happy. I’m happy for her.

How can I not believe that this pandemic is a blessing? It has moved someone’s cubicle to her living room then to her mother’s home, and soon to a beautiful place where dreams have lingered for Heaven knows how long. I can imagine how serene and fun her productivity will be!

May all beings be happy.

He Is Zero Today

When moments collide,
Time slows down, space enlarges.
A coincidence?

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Based on solar calendar, it is my father’s birthday today. Based on lunar calendar it is his death commemoration.

Mathematically the two calculations are crossing, astronomically celestial bodies are in moving in harmony, momentarily it’s just a coincidence. To his family it’s a special moment— celebrating a point when an important human being’s life in the world is started and ended.

God bless you, Bapak. Happy 0th birthday! Are you watching me? Thank you. But no need, just take a rest, I’m safe now. 😘

my favorite taste, not his coz I eat it not he😁

Add Acceptance To Each Plan

This night gets longer.
More dreams linger in silence.
Lid the bucket list.

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I pray to have enough time to be able to visit all places in my bucket list as 2020 and 2021’s trips are unchecked. If only dreaming is stoppable,

Thanks God I enjoy getting lost walking or biking that’s the best option in this cute island.

May all beings be happy.

🍀

Plan as if you live forever. Accept today as the best gift.

Language of Dreams

Almost given up:
Milestones to reach the final.
Language of dreams

Japanese is almost as difficult as Arabic but I didn’t find hard time learning Arabic as the brain was much fresher with more time to focus on lessons by then. I almost gave up this Japanese lesson as I felt too slow. Until today mixing up between シ and ツ still happens again and again. Different forms of adjective and noun when tenses change still confuse me. The crazy kanji has also tortured me. Why did I even learn this language? 🤪 Drama! 🥰

But hey! I won’t stop until I can read and compose beautiful poems in Japanese. Too much a dream? Ok, I won’t stop until I can present the company’s Code of Conduct in Japanese! Making more sense! 😁

If the teacher isn’t this good, I might have given up earlier. The Sensei is such an expert of Japanese language and culture that she can make me understand why those Japanese I’ve met have behaved so strangely not as I expected Japanese I thought would be. 😝

Some people are just so “like that” regardless they are Japanese, Chinese, Korean, Singaporean or any other….. Life is so interesting, take it easy!

God bless all….

One of the easy thing I was frustrated of….! What a stupid me! Look at the ugly frustrated hand writing! 🥶

You’re A River

Flow, Beloved. Flow.
Be a river whose stream knows
Its gravity. Yours
Is me? Making it flow back
To where a home is. Within—

A river is a river only when the stream is moving to a point of a pulling force. Don’t  get stuck or blocked because that is when you lose your being as a river.

Find the tiniest gap and flow….

Never getting bored of it 💞

Shifting Culture

You look perfect, Love
Mechanically living.
I can’t reach you, Love.
You’re deadly cold snow— heartless
Pushing me farther away.

Some work of art is precisely designed, formulated and worked by robot. Accuracy, precision, flawless

Some is beautifully designed, measured and worked by living artist whose movement is built through heart and soul. Relatively beautiful with direct human touch

Each prefers one with some price

A robot carving accurately on the door panel
An artist carving Jepara style design on the door panel

Some human beings are so mechanical, they don’t know how to respond others humanely. They simply see things through a flow chart. Hope that this group extinct soon.

May all beings be happy.

Sweetness In Heart

Beyond layered skies
Is beauty unknown, my Love
I’ll never give up.

This I wishes happiness to that you across the ocean although the you never knows….

God bless Louis Armstrong who’s bringing sweetness to the heart even when he is not here anymore. 💞

Is Life A…?

An old man’s waiting
For the sun to rise. He moans
At the moon. “Dark night,
Pull away. You block me from
Beauty.” — Life’s a mentalist.

Who is the true beauty? The moon or the sun? Debatable! It’s a matter of played tricks of layered lights— light upon light with darkness in between. How would it be not cozy hiding under a cool calm night while patiently welcoming morning? How would it be not fun playing in a warm radiant day while cheerfully welcoming dusk?

Ah…. Why should one be getting old while constantly denying what is….

Salaam….

Mask, Oh Mask

The hidden ID
Brings confidence and courage:
Covert exercise—

Wearing mask has good impact mentally: especially bringing more confidence to do what’s wanted to do (responsibly). Wearing it though might also give some rather unpleasant experience such as not breathing comfortably, needing to nod or squint eyes to show we are smiling, foggy glasses, etc.

While now we are mandated to wear masks once going out of home, hope someday soon mask is mandated only in some area.

Now let’s take this as a short training to be confident and to give up identity for a while for the sake of protecting each other. Training in and out!

Let’s mask ourselves in style. 😷

Tips of wearing mask: not too tight, find masks that give space in front of nose and mouth; disposable is the best but reusable is good enough (wear each based on where you go and whom you meet); change everyday for reusable or twice a day of you need more comfort; wash the reusable after use the soonest possible, sprinkle mask with some herbal oil to bring good air (peppermint and lemon are good choice for breathing); cute reusable brightens days.

May all beings be happy.

always practice squinting eyes in the lift before meeting people out there 😷

Cleaning Time

Good time  to clean up:
Throw away what’s not needed.
Unstuff. Travel light. 

Reviewing my Pinterest account once again, I found that I’ve been hoarding. At the beginning I thought it was cool to collect all the pictures for reference on some topics. Is that? Yes, to some level. No, to some extent.

But still I like it 😁

Checking my home, that’s more interesting. Too many books and they should be soon given away. Getting older, I feel that reading the phenomena surrounding me is much more interesting and enriching than reading books, except reading some comics as part of my language study. That’s better, too so I can save more for future dream— hope the future still wants me. 🥰

Cleaning starts! Some memories are worth erasing.

May all beings be happy.

Pinterest is still incredibly amazing; I’ll keep it 🙂

The Unhealthy Healthy Food

Not about the food,
More about gluttony. Good!
At least I still chew.

I joined “Eat Well Challenge” in which what’s consumed is calculated and what’s burnt is regulated. I thought it would be as simple as submitting what is eaten. Now I see how healthy both my body and brain will be as the calorie calculation include my weighing the ingredients and decision making on what’s best to combine.

The plan to cook duck has twisted a brain. Duck contains a lot of fat, which is the best part of it. Yummy!!! So…. Duck it is! When calculated, the calorie is high and when it is reported to the challenge platform, it is not counted as the expected healthy food…. Ggrrrrh!

herbs and spices lovey lovey!
cute duck!
hot duck!
only the veggies are accepted as healthy food and the calories are not even half of the duck itself 😂

Don’t overestimate what’s called healthy eating because the calorie calculation will overwrite all the estimation exactly like when you think expressing love honestly will result in respectful rejection, instead you’ll get ignorance and humiliation.

Thanks God for always leading me to self respect and kindness.

May all beings be happy.