Weekend Cooking & Sketching – my mood

Weekend is always fun with cooking my own food. Never say my food is bad. However it is, I’ll eat it and say YUMMY!!!

And of course sketching, writing and walking!!! 🥰

May all beings be happy!


There’s Nothing Too Much – haiku

There’s nothing too much.
It is just you who don’t have
The capacity.

Here now 🥰

Some people underestimate others by saying “that’s too much”. It is not always the case….

Some people say “that’s too much” just because they can’t digest that “too much” with their capacity.

So, if your brilliance gets “that’s too much” comment, step back and look. You’ll find those people’s capacity is way too low and can’t reach your level.

May all beings be happy.

Screenshot 2019-12-07 at 3.28.37 PM

What Should I Do Now? – haiku

What should I do now?
When the brain’s frozen, rotten–
Reset to zero.

Singapore – Feb. 24, 2020 / 7:45pm

What will people do when finding that there is one big mistake laying as the base of the whole life? Like when someone finds that the way s/he perceives god has changed…. I can imagine how chaotic his/her life is.

The only thing to do is to reset to zero.
Don’t think,
Don’t judge,
Don’t evaluate,
Don’t ask question.
Just observe any thought or question,
Look into self,
Accept what it is,
Be with yourself,
Embrace who you are.

Karma is a bitch
Yet the worst is when the bitch reminds you for payback.
Don’t let your next life is the repeated, unfinished lessons
That will punish you again and again,
That will make you stupid person again and again.

Better meet the bitch now and pass the test.

May all beings be happy.


Thanks for the picture to: https://www.motaword.com/blog/famous-translators/the-little-prince

Three Cats In One Day – haiku

Three cats in one day
Challenged what sharing’s about:
Sacrifice or deed?

Bali – February 21, 2020 / 22:13

Cat seems to be a natural attraction for me, either I’m attracted to them or they are to me. Good thing is cat is sweet and adorable so I (almost) never reject cat.

Today I found at least three cats; six actually but only three were framed through the camera, the rest were too fast to catch or too serene to disturb.

Cat has taught me a lot of thingS especially about how to be relaxed yet of fully alarmed at the same time. My first pet cat, Bob was the best teacher on those two things – hope he is now happy across the bridge seeing me more and more relaxed with my own self. What he did was true sincerity, not a mathematical take and give. Thank you, Bob Kucing!

May all beings be happy.
May all feline be adorable and loved.


Ma’am, You Are Off Spec – haiku

Ma’am, you are off spec.
What do you mean, I asked them.
“I’m sorry, just saying.”

Kuala Lumpur – Feb. 18, 2020 / 18:07


When changing outlook, people will experience many different responses, or nothing at all if they are not either likeable or hatable. Both poles might respond to your change in contrary opinion: if you change in their favour, they will tell you you look better; if you shift away from their taste, they might tell you you could be better. Don’t worry if you are so so, they will ignore you and things go well.

I went to a supplier today and it was another first visit to the site since July when I was still “doing fine” according to their mindset. My colleague already hinted me of what comments I would get from the people from this particular company. She said I would be “audited”.

And, she was right.
Read through my conversation at lunch time – some details are omitted due to its level of sarcasm.

S (Supplier): Hey, Ma’am! Long time no see.
M (M): Hey!
S: What happened to you?
M: Nothing.
S: Your appearance?
M: Why?
S: You are off spec!
M: Am I a kind of laptop now? (laughing bitterly)
S: I mean you look better in previous style. I’m sorry just saying, not criticising.
M: Oh if that’s what you mean….
S: Bro! (calling his colleague who also knows me) What do you think of her? Better in previous or current look? Better previous, right? Right? (the other one smiled in embarrassment and said “before”). See, he said you are better in previous look! Aiyooo! What happened to you? Two people already said this! Why? Why? Why?
M: Thank you for your compliment. But more people said I’m better in current look.

I thanked God I finished my lunch when he interrogated me. If not, I would secretly sprinkle wasabi on his meal. I know he doesn’t eat Japanese food and it would make his day worse with wasabi in curry.

I walked back to the meeting room and still chuckled with the “You are off spec” 😂

Oh Love, I’m suitable working in an electronic company. God bless me…. 🥰😄

I Am A Lady – haiku

I am a lady,
Was born and grown in Java,
Will travel the globe.

Singapore – Feb. 11, 2020 / 19:45

I feel more and more feminine and I like it. I’m comfortable to be a woman although being a woman is not always easy in my original culture, Javanese. I am not a typical Javanese who are shy, withdrawal and submissive to the male and yes-yes-yes whether liking it or not. I will be in those mode in some situations but I don’t feel them as my nature. All those traits shall be presented as a response to a situation, not as a nature.

Once one very mean aunt said to me in a very sharp tone “You are not a Javanese lady yet, my child! Learn. No man will want to marry you if you are brave, confident and vocal.”

I didn’t say anything because I was just 12 at that time. I didn’t even know what was Javanese lady and marriage. What I knew was I played with girls and boys together.

She sounded cruel but she was right that no man has married me until now. She would say (if she happened to be alive today) to me it is because of my failure to be a Javanese lady; but if she were still alive, I would tell her politely that it may be because the men approaching me just failed to be a true gentlemen. I will not change myself into the Javanese lady characteristic that has been in a biased assumption in my community and family.

I never doubt myself to be what I am now – I might change but to better state. Moreover, I found a good reading that describes a Javanese woman in the eyes of a modern Javanese woman. It might not resonate 100% of what I consider a woman be but at least the way the writer positions herself helps me understand why I never fitted the boxes brought to me before.

What an enlightenment!

Thank you Google for bringing me to Staying True As A Javanese Woman

….. and maybe this too if you wonder how an ideal Javanese woman should be in different perspective: Ideal Javanese Woman???.

Life is full of magic and I’ve always found the magic to be a female from my beautiful archipelago.

May all beings be happy.


Screenshot 2020-02-11 at 8.00.36 PM

People Won’t Get It – haiku

People won’t get it.
They don’t have to. Let it flow.
Life’s to experience.

Singapore – Feb. 9, 2020 / 21:11

When I felt hurt, I would say to someone why he was so mean to me even when I didn’t do harmful things to him. I realised that I was not supposed to say that because he was doing it to protect himself, to serve his need, to love himself. I probably would do what he did in the same situation…. Hmm no, I wouldn’t though ☺️

Though feeling guilty, I won’t apologise because he probably doesn’t need my apology, he probably also understands why some statements bursted in such situation. Or the worst scenario, perhaps he doesn’t even want to have contact with me forever. It doesn’t matter, some people’s cave is just much deeper to reach in. All maybe….

Human beings’ Life is full of ups and downs that are only understood by the individual. Even the closest friends who know him/her won’t totally get it. So why do I have to persuade someone to explain oneself to me? I might not get it either just like my friends don’t get what’s truly my experience.

Dear Self, take a break. I’m tired of fighting. I want to float like all those stuff flowing with the river to the ocean….

May all beings be happy….



Cute Acts of Selfie – ranting

I didn’t enjoy selfie before but I probably now love selfie especially to show what I am wearing to my friends living across the ocean. But another reason of loving selfie probably because I feel more confident and happier with my current look. I’ve lost almost 15 kilograms since September last year. And I’m excited to lose 10 more kilograms up to March this year. Whoohoo! All is for health and beauty! 😍

Just last night I was kind of awaken that now I have time for only myself in heart and head; and with the perfect focus to myself, I can have much better look than this. Yes!
Gosh! I’d been in long years of suffering from “silently loving the unreachable and the emotionally unavailable persona” and it is kind of over now. In the past six months I found that this persona is a sun who is too ………… (you can fill it with any adjective you like); I couldn’t cope with the charm. ❤️

Oh, going back to selfie!
I do selfie almost everyday. In office, in hotel room, at home, at the airport, in the car, etc…. I do selfie to show my clothes, my earrings, my footwear, my hairband, my craziness about dressing up now!

Am I happy with my selfie? Not always, but almost always…. Except for my hair! My hair is still messy! The camellia flower oil from Japan doesn’t work wonder, maybe fake! I can only hope it gets longer soon so that I can have it professionally cut.

Check some of my low-profile selfies. Low profile? Yes, there are many more that are much better with my upgraded selfie skill but I keep the high profile ones for offline consumption. 😊

Check them out….! ☺️


When I was still chubby :-)) – my beloved office, Singapore


Trying on hairband with Mbak Nungki, when still chubby :-)) – Bandung, Indonesia


Showing my new shoe to Sabrina – before flight in NAIA, Manila


Morning before leaving to Binan – oh my hair… – in EDSA Shangri-La


Showing my new dress and sneakers to the Avengers – my hair!!! – at home


Showing my peacock dangling – my hair – Sofitel Phnom Penh

Can You Pack It Well? – haiku

Can you pack it well?
It takes forever to do
If you’re amateur.

Singapore – Feb. 3, 2020 / 20:31

My nephew is flying back to Indonesia tomorrow morning – he spent 5 days taking over my bed snoring and shopping around useless things just to celebrate his belated 18th birthday that was supposed to be December 2019.

Now he was busy stacking all his clothes and shopped items into his medium luggage. He wanted to show me that he was capable without my help so I didn’t offer my help until finally he gave up….

“Can you help me hold the other end of the luggage?”

“No, not only holding the other end but you need total help. Let’s repack, boy.”

He didn’t agree but finally followed my instruction on unpacking all, stacking things first then inserting the next things later.

Packing is like putting on clothes for me. Perhaps packing and unpacking luggage shall be part of my official job description. So don’t try to beat me for packing things into luggage or trunk. I can pack things very nicely in quite short time. But don’t ask me to pack things into backpack — I give up. I still think traveling in backpack is super fun except that the clothes will be crumpled making me look even messier and my back will ache…. I wish I’m naturally cute and strong. 😊

“Let me do this luggage ‘coz I’m one of those professional luggage packers, boy. Pack your own backpack, I am not accountable for that….”

“So, you don’t help me with this? What kind of aunt are you?”

“Honest one. God bless me, Vito!”


Of course God bless you, too dear nephew. Safe flight.


Don’t Be Sad Too Long – haiku

Don’t be sad too long.
Those who died don’t always die.
They live in our heart.

Singapore – Jan. 31, 2020 / 23:18


Rest In Peace, Kobe Bryant.
You are loved, you are remembered.


For the one who is deeply saddened by Kobe’s passing away, please release your emotion. Please be sure Kobe is in a better place, playing heavenly basketball with Gigi and the angels.

Rekindle Kobe in your heart and embrace Kobe’s good quality as part of yours.

May all beings be happy….

I Peep All The Apps – haiku

I peep all the apps,
Close them then get back to mails—
New window shopping.

Manila – Jan. 28, 2020 / 22:00


How many applications do you keep in your smart phone? I saw a friend’s iPhone with one hundred fifty (150) apps including the original apps and the games, social media, productivity, etc.

I have some apps – no game anymore as they gave me more stress than fun. I killed my Facebook, gave up Twitter, keep Instagram and WordPress, make a new Pinterest. I browse around those apps when bored or before sleeping. At the end of the day I’ve gotta back to check my email….

Opening and closing the apps is like a new form of window shopping. Good! At least I save energy and money. 😝


Let’s Go Get The Moon – haiku

Let’s go get the moon.
Why not sun? ‘Coz it’s too hot—
Too bright and too far.

Manila – Jan. 27, 2020 / 17:57


I never want something perfect, I just want something accessible that’s why I don’t want to expect anything from whom or what I love.

Life, please bless me with blessed and beautiful happiness – just perfect enough with all my imperfection.

God bless the moon, the sun and the earth.



I Swear – sweet song

So sweet…. 😊

Enjoy….! 😍

I swear by the moon and the stars in the sky
And I swear like the shadow that’s by your side

I see the questions in your eyes
I know what’s weighing on your mind
You can be sure I know my heart

‘Cause I’ll stand beside you through the years
You’ll only cry those happy tears
And though I make mistakes
I’ll never break your heart

And I swear by the moon and the stars in the sky
I’ll be there
I swear like a shadow that’s by your side
I’ll be there

For better or worse, till death do us part
I’ll love you with every beat of my heart
And I swear

I’ll give you every thing I can
I’ll build your dreams with these two hands
We’ll hang some memories on the walls

And when just the two of us are there
You won’t have to ask if I still care
‘Cause as the time turns the page, my love won’t age at all

And I swear by the moon and the stars in the sky (I’ll be there)
I swear (and I swear) like the shadow that’s by your side
I’ll be there (I’ll be there)

For better or worse, till death do us part
I’ll love you with every beat of my heart
And I swear

I swear (I swear) by the moon and stars in the sky
I’ll be there
I swear like the shadow that’s by your side
I’ll be there

For better or worse, till death do us part
I’ll love you with every (single) beat of my heart
I swear, I swear, oh, I, swear

I’m Not Supergirl – haiku

I’m not Supergirl.
I am a super woman.
Now you get that, right?

NAIA Manila – Jan. 26, 2020 / 14:30


After standing for more than 30 minutes queueing in immigration counter and hustling to conveyor for my luggage, I was now waiting for the shuttle car to EDSA.

I don’t know why some gentlemen don’t act like gentlemen. They cut the line, THEY CUT A LADY’S LINE.

I said to that particular gent. “I queue before you. Are you in a hurry?”

“Oh oh I’m sorry. I didn’t see you queue.”


He took my car without saying thank you. I promised to give him a gift of sarcasm if I meet him in the hotel.

Life is not always sweet but a bitter man is unacceptable!

May all beings be happy.



Sun Rises, Sun Sets – haiku

Sun rises, sun sets.
Earth is shadowed. Time is formed.
Twelve hours is gone.

Up in the sky – Jan. 25, 2020 / 10:18am

Why do you worry about time? It doesn’t exist. It is an agreed cycle that has haunted human beings for centuries and now is traded with their freedom.

You are limited with all that is scheduled that is timed – breakfast at 7, pick up at 7:30, meeting at 9, lunch at 12, dinner at 8, sleep for at least 7 hours blah blah blah….

And when the 12 hours of the dark is spent without sleeping, they call you not healthy — I don’t wanna sleep, I wanna daydream about my love. And when the 12 hours of the bright is spent without working, they call you idle – I am not working for your approval, I work because I know what I do is useful at any time for certain group of people. And when the 12 hours is gone, they tell you that you are getting old – my body deteriorates but my heart and soul are as fresh as morning dew!

Why are some people judgmental?

Don’t they know that I don’t have breakfast because if I do then I’ll be sleepy as heaven the whole morning. I hate 7:30 pick up because it is when I’m supposed to attend the nature call. The 9 meeting is so awkward; people stare at you like zombies who are ready to eat your brain as theirs are almost dried because of your predictable speech. Lunch at 12 – can it be pushed to 2? I want to sleep at 12! ☺️

Many need to compromise and ‘coz I wanna be called normal, I agree with 12+12=24hours productivity. Among many I’m like walking backward though 😝
Actually I’m not, I’m flying forward and have to wait until they reach my point.

Happy short weekend!

May all beings be happy.


Joy of Gardening – haiku

Joy of gardening
Is seeing buds appear
After a long wait.

Phnom Penh – January 22, 2020 / 18:35


This morning when watering the plants I was given a good surprise by one of the orchids in the balcony. A stem of buds has come!

I got her last year from a plant nursery near my favourite durian stall in Ang Mo Kio market. I can’t remember the color, it is either white or purplish white – my grey matter doesn’t even cooperate to recall a color of my orchid.

An amateur plant lover, I’ve been desperate that some of my orchids didn’t seem to bloom again. Only one has produced flowers again and again, the rest are just rooting and greening. Now that another orchid gets joyously blooming, I have a hope of levelling up to less amateur orchid lover. 🌞

This orchid has a twin next to her. Her twin is still struggling with the root and leaves. She might bloom, too once the roots and leaves are getting stronger. I really hope not only these twins would bloom, I have four more that haven’t happily shown their flowers. Please, dear orchids….

I’ll buy you the best durian if you all bloom! 🥰

May all beings be happy.


Alarm Wakes Me Up – haiku

Alarm wakes me up.
None beats these back-to-back trips
Except the laundry!

Jakarta – January 20, 2020 / 21:00


The busy days have come before a short break of Chinese New Year. With all the lined-up flight schedule in my iCal, I feel energised to meet some amazing people who dedicate their life for perfection of what simple things they’ve chosen to do.

When I review my schedule, it is like a fantastic juggle among packing, fly out to B, working, fly in to A, unpacking, laundry, packing, fly out to B again…. fly out to B again…. 🤪

I bet some people get bored to fly to the same places. I don’t. I like meeting people – the same group of people. Some annoying, some sweet, some emotionless, some smart, some shy but all I’ve met are light bearers creating workplaces healthy and safe from physical, psychological, occupational and environmental unfair treatment. But….

…. I don’t like one thing: with so many short trips with unpacked laundry, I don’t have enough clothes to pack. Damn! Sometimes I regret of having too few a clothing yet too many books and rings. Gotta buy some simple clothes soon 🤪


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