Tag: Vito

Without Teacher

Learning, life, love, Poetic, This Person, Those People

What am I
Without teacher?
A lost wanderer
Losing destination.

What am I
Without teacher?
A confused traveler
Losing guidance

What am I
Without teacher?
A dreamer
Losing inspiration.

What am I
Without teacher?
A human
Losing meaning.

What am I
Without teacher?
A Soul
Repeating the same mistakes.

Dear
Teacher,
You are born
For me
To be reborn
As me.

I'm grateful to
You.

Today’s lunch break was about a phenomenal chat with some teachers of life.

Thousands if not millions of teachers have taught me in life. There are some that I cherish the most today, those that have triggered me to make biggest decisions in life.

Thank you, dear teachers❣️

Bapak Merta Ada, he was the one teaching me to go within without doubt, without limit – “spread love and compassion”, his advice 🥹

Sister Zak, my Arabic teacher — she emphasised that what we read needs to be well understood first then pondered then can be interpreted (differently) — “be a responsible interpreter of the Quran for yourself, no one to blame when you make wrong interpretation or decision“, her advice

Aaron Cass, my mentor in Beshara School who helped me open most doors of freedom of responsibly being human through his amazing knowledge and wisdom about sufism and esp about Ibn Arabi & Rumi — “from now on whatever you do differently, never make it a new religion”, his advice

Ina, a best friend from high school whose action moved my soul: she left her brilliant career (at the same time I started mine in Singapore) without new career to take care of her parents for her sense of responsibility; she took care of her mother until she passed away, now she is taking care of her father; Ina, you are beautifully blessed — “let’s exchange stupid memes and videos”, her message

dear Ibu, i won’t let anyone hurt you — “work responsibly and take care”, her every morning’s advice

Vito, my dear nephew, “i will always love you and protect you forever”, his last message before he passed

the fire warden in the mirror, “have you smiled today?” my greeting to myself

Memory of Fun

Learning, Those People

Vito and Ocka in fun flash rehearsal in the costume storage room 😁😘

💕

his life was about fun and memory about him should be about fun, too

Never-ending Prayer

Learning
In a prayer
Millions of pearls
Are dangling
In a line of blessings
Letting go off
What is called
Attachment,
Co-dependency,
And ignorance.

When darkness traps
What is called hope,
It is love
That keeps it sparked
And sparkling
Before it is free,
Traveling light
On a beautiful orbit.

——

my boy, I commit to celebrate your life and dreams instead — be always in our heart; you are so much loved, you are always remembered 💕

alfatihaah 💕

Selfish To Selfless

Learning
Time flies
Space shrinks
Moment signifies
Does it even matter?

You farewelled
Sweetly to all,
Yet no one knew
Until you departed.

This selfish self
Has learnt selflessness
That it is about forgiving regrets
And escorting you to the grand gate.

We weeped heavy tears,
You’ve left long love trails.
We thought we loved you,
You’ve ignored our selfish wails.

You smiled at the long line
That witnessed your selfless joy.
We smiled to you, thanking life
For giving privilege of having that boy.

Thank you
For magically turning us
From egoistical arrogance
To considerate beings.

Thank you,
My dear boy.

——

Gathering after his funeral, most of us shared about our experiences with him in his life time. Most of stories were his witty strength, social awareness and artistic talents. Many were also about how much he ate — he was not a picky eater.

Yet some kept saying “I can’t stop crying”, “I was one of those giving him last sacred bath”, “I trembled one night before he passed away”, “Why did you leave me?”, “I am so lonely without him around”, blahblahblah of all expressions showing how people experience you. Great self you are!

Yet does it matter? We mostly are all regretting what we didn’t do what we should have done with and to you. We mostly have difficult time to forgive ourselves for not doing so with and to you.

It is about you — all the administration and ceremonies. Yet at the end it is about forgiving ourselves from what we have regretted and about accepting that you are not physically around anymore.

You? Vito, you pass this cycle and enjoy the happiness beyond our joy!

My tears will dry; yet my love will keep flowing to you.

💕

Salaam.

we’ll continue striving for what you’ve always dreamt of — loving family and wise fun personality!

people said it is the longest line of funeral procession for a young man of an ordinary family — everyone said it is because of your true and selfless self

Pink Rose

Learning, Poetic
As pink
As rose
My heart
Chants you
Forever
As love
That throbs
Through blood
And tears
And breath
And words
In heart
And body
And mind
And spirit
And soul

you might not like pink rose but this is the most beautiful petals with which i can sprinkle with the least tears for your no-turn-back journey 💕

our last Bali tour with Ocka was our most testing trip — the rain and storm and damn how would you stop driving every three hours and said “Mbak, i am hungry i can die driving” 😁

our love is about laughter and wit ♥️

my broken heart in romance has turned to a minuscule particle compared to my broken heart of losing my beloved nephew

Run Free, My Boy!

Learning

My tears will dry
But my love will keep flowing

Please forgive me. Please forgive me. Please forgive me.

💕

you were young yet always the one giving me wise words to keep being my own self — you were right “you are alone but never lonely, look at your poems, all struck me with fire to stay strong!”

you were poorer than me yet always the one telling me to keep positive yet humble

you were as fun as my soul won’t be yet you are a soul as wise as my wisdom can’t be

what about our next trips that must be cancelled? you just walk and leave me a beautiful gaping hole in my heart

we love you with or without words, we lose you with or without tears

I LOVE YOU AND WE’LL MEET AGAIN IN A BETTER PLACE AND TIME

Can You Pack It Well? – haiku

Learning, Poetic

Can you pack it well?
It takes forever to do
If you’re amateur.

Singapore – Feb. 3, 2020 / 20:31

—

My nephew is flying back to Indonesia tomorrow morning – he spent 5 days taking over my bed snoring and shopping around useless things just to celebrate his belated 18th birthday that was supposed to be December 2019.

Now he was busy stacking all his clothes and shopped items into his medium luggage. He wanted to show me that he was capable without my help so I didn’t offer my help until finally he gave up….

“Can you help me hold the other end of the luggage?”

“No, not only holding the other end but you need total help. Let’s repack, boy.”

He didn’t agree but finally followed my instruction on unpacking all, stacking things first then inserting the next things later.

Packing is like putting on clothes for me. Perhaps packing and unpacking luggage shall be part of my official job description. So don’t try to beat me for packing things into luggage or trunk. I can pack things very nicely in quite short time. But don’t ask me to pack things into backpack — I give up. I still think traveling in backpack is super fun except that the clothes will be crumpled making me look even messier and my back will ache…. I wish I’m naturally cute and strong. 😊

“Let me do this luggage ‘coz I’m one of those professional luggage packers, boy. Pack your own backpack, I am not accountable for that….”

“So, you don’t help me with this? What kind of aunt are you?”

“Honest one. God bless me, Vito!”

😂

Of course God bless you, too dear nephew. Safe flight.