graphs of my Universe
Today I saw magic
Warmly greeted my throbbing head.
“How deep is your love?” Said she.
“To whom?” Asked I.
“Does it matter?” Said she.
And so I was magically charmed
By these heart beats
Chanting a repeated naive rhyme
About how nice I’ve been breathing.
——
only those who know the death is just an inch away can do this wholeheartedly 💝
I’ll live not only 1000 lives,
I’ve lived forever.
I love not only my whole life,
I love everlastingly.
How can I not love the life
Giving me chance to meet you
Again
And
Again
And
Again?
I won’t though beg for another again
If again will end the love
To the now and here.
See you again
In now and here,
Better one
I know not where.
——
the way you treat me will not change my feeling to you; yet will not shorten my distance from you either — love is only for love, never for hatred 💝
Once upon a time
A seed turned to a fruit
In between two times.
It celebrated its confusion
Of losing itself in every phase.
Why am I soft, while
I was hard?
Why am I hanging, while
I was buried?
Why can’t I remember where
I came from?
How can I know which
Is the truest of me?
The fruit ripened in blue
Fell out weathered.
Rotten
Dried
Cracked
Seeds scattered
Sprouted
Grew taller.
Would the seed forget who she was again?
Once upon a time
A tree remembered who
Greeted the boughs
Harvested the best
Celebrated the flesh
Threw away the seeds who then
Grew.
It was not an expression of “once again”
Not the same seed
Yet the seed
Of the same tree.
Still the same—
No mourning
Nothing is lost, yet
Nothing is forever.
Knowing is time travel or
A review of history or
A humble diary.
Just wait for one moment to see.
Life is just like that.
——-
from Pinterest
How strong?
As strong as money
Which can buy travel vouchers for holiday
And it helps draw long list of visited sites;
A list that shows to the world
That experience comes with style.
Unfortunately some might be just albums of photos with forgotten moment and lost meaning.
Still travelers travel farther than homebody
Who stays in front of TV learning about all countries,
Yet more thoroughly and vibrantly
Even able to write vibrantly. Look at Karl May!
You mean to understand different places
Doesn’t need real traveling?
Might be?
So what’s the strength of money?
Aah! Not that strong in fact.
Wait!
It is still strong.
Not the strongest though!
So,
Is money a lethal weapon?
I know not, said I,
I know not.
Anymore.
How weak?
As weak as fibrous roots
Which can’t give trees strong anchorage
And they give little supplies of food to the deep interior.
Yet fibrous roots don’t destroy building foundation.
Fibrous roots are good for sloping area,
They help prevent soil erosion.
They are not weak.
At least not that weak!
So,
Are fibrous roots the weakest anchor?
I know not, said I,
I know not.
Anymore.
Aah! Cry, cry
For losing the stance.
Let the tears dry.
Let each layer dry,
When it dries, it is becoming skin
Until all are.
It is just like that
Like peeling onion.
——
from Pinteres
Without him I die
and with him’s no better
With or without him
longing’s the same
I found him, finding
what I hadn’t foreseen,
the cure and disease
as equal fevers
His silhouette flares
as we draw near
each other and
burns more proud
The deeper the harmony
the sharper the pain
Measure for measure
as decreed
——
The above is poem excerpted from below book — one that well explains how love consumes good soul. By simply loving life has shown what joy and pain can be perceived as either happiness or unhappiness depending on how deep or how true love is given meaning or taken for granted.
It has taken me quite long journey to finally connect the dots among the manifestation of love, pain, joy, harmony. It takes whole life to refine love and it takes big love to refine life — a vicious circle that keeps the fire burns, light flares and smoke billows bringing hope up to the sky.
“Life is light. Life is true.”
May all beings be happy.
♥️
Tarjuman Al-ashwaq (The Translator of Desires)
After a long pause,
Waves of time now delivers
Pretty joy in store.
How should she welcome
A guest that greets with surprise?
A sweet smile in store—
——
buds of secundum are welcoming with joy
How much am I true
To this self?
As true as
The pretty
And the ugly
In me
In front of mirrors
Reflecting
What they love to see.
Life is light.
Light is true.
To this self do I say:
Walk truly as true as white clouds hanging over green trees.
Walk lightly as light as foot steps on green grass.
——
i stole my photo from an Instagram story of someone who secretly took my photo before the Tapa Brata started — i am not a truly physically good photo model but i am a human being making effort to be true ♥️ i hope to see this photo owner again some day only heaven knows when and say thank you for showing my strong arms to the world 😂
How are you, dear white?
Everything looks bright on white.
It’s clear on itself.
——
a white mug with ginger & honey tea 💝 get drunk with it and make all work excellent! ☺️
sterilised or warmed? whatever! loving warm white mug in my hand 💕
this champion is quiet when working and resting unlike me talking at work snoring at sleep 🥶
parrrtyyy! no, no, not my party; it belongs to one favourite cleaning lady
No one can hurt me.
I am a feather,
I am water,
Either.
No one will hurt me.
I am a feather,
I am water,
Either.
We are feather on water.
No one can hurt them,
No one will,
Either.
——
no one can, no one will — if one does, one does to one’s self
I’m water
Humble enough to mold myself
To this pitcher.
This life’s a pitcher
Kind enough to tilt herself
To the river.
I’m water
Flowing by myself
In myself to the sea.
This’s the strongest soft
With what this rocky heart
Gets shaped through time.
——-
water: naturally willing to be shaped, spiced up, scented, coloured, treated by temperatures — matured through stories 😃
Is she giving up?
She’s waiting for the right time.
Just another leap—
——
💝
played Coldplay all day today as if their concert is happening in my living room 😁
gave up the queue because my medical treatment on May 19 was much more important; if i am healthy, i still can work to earn money for the next concerts somewhere else 🙏🏼 happy watching, all ticket war winners! you deserve your strategy whatever it was
You
Are the beats in my heart.
Whereabout your heart
Am I in?
You
Are the water of a vase.
Whereabout your vase
Am I of?
You
Are the -ness at my nothing.
Whereabout your thing
Am I at?
There is silence,
And it answers me through.
I am nowhere about
You.
—
when the water is gone, all is dead — only dried leaves and air 🙏🏼
Essentially pure?
None. No distiller’s perfect
But time. Refining—
—
Smell might be my strongest sense. It gives me both pleasant and not so pleasant experiences in life. To share the experiences is of course an ultimate goal, yet it takes time to materialise it.
To start
Have you smelled the earth wetted by rain water?
Have you smelled the grass cut in the morning, noon and afternoon?
Have you smelled your parents’ clean clothes?
Try those and you’ll be amazed with the sensation brought to you.
Salaam.
goal: to distill essential oils for myself and those around me — this is gonna be a read-it-when-i-want-it book ✨
May I
Sing a sweet song
With
You
Under glowing stars shooting
To leave their age?
May I
Sit silently
With
You
Under a quiet dusk rolling
To welcome dawn?
May I
Count the sheep
With
You
Under a dreamy night shining
To light a hope?
May I?
—-
may I eat gyoza? left over from last batch — so pleasing to eat my own food, almost like heaven 😁
Journey to a home
Through climb, prance, flow, dive and fly
Deserves a quenching.
—
a glass of lemongrass tea with chia seeds is a gift for a traveler 💝
She has heard bird news,
Sending messages
Through Morse Code.
Dots, dashes, spaces—
She has heard numbers, words, punctuations,
Telling stories
About no hope.
Acceptance, letting go, moving on—
She has heard songs, poems, winds,
Springing in heart
Warmly and gently.
Future is brighter only with clarity.
She has heard a woodpecker
Reminding her of signals and signs
In every dance of nature
To be enjoyed and understood.
She has heard of you
Giving blocks and traps
To redirect her to her own path
To happiness.
She has heard of heaven
Approving whatever she’d do
As long as she’s happy and safe
Without disturbing life.
She has heard
Dews imbuing morning to refresh,
Twilight whispering night to rest.
Life is truly a woodpecker’s Morse Code.
She has heard
And she closes her eyes,
But not ears
As long as she’s happy and safe.
Thank you, Michael Lai for again allowing me to use your poetic pictures to illustrate a poem of mine that has been poking me since forever. 🙏🏼
Bay Woodpecker Pecking a Hole in the Tree (4 Photos)
There are billions of stars
Swimming in the dark.
They are born and will die
After completing their spark.
With centers the stars travel
Flying as strong as sky larks.
They reach some terminal
Even without visible landmarks.
There’s a captain in the cockpit,
Pulled by a federation out there.
Stars won’t easily quit
Unless there’s a common end to share.
Journey of a star
—-
Captain Picard — favourite capt 👍🏽
Mr. Spock 👍🏽 — favourite crew
Surprise!
Said she
Showing the hopeless
That
Survival is about adaptability
Welcomed by nature,
Approved by resolution,
Driven by muscles,
Enjoyed by senses.
I’m gonna be yellow!
—-
can you see the spike of oncidium (must be yellow) at the left? i saw it when sitting on the toilet enjoying my good time 😀— suddenly the beauty struck me! 😍 thank you! 🙏🏼 i’ll be patient waiting for you to bloom 💛
she used to be one of balcony gang members and was about to pass as the original media (wood bark and charcoal) started decaying; her new home is now shower room in a glass flower vase; media is sponge, charcoal and water 😍
Life is light
When she dances
And sings.
As long as you are happy,
She says.
—
smile, dance and sing! 😀 unbeatable when she takes good care of the child within 💝
I’ll love
No matter what
I’ll be over anyways.
I’ll work
No matter what
I’ll be over anyways.
There is me
Or not,
It might be the same.
Yet as long as there is me,
I’ll do what I can
To add more
Meanings
And
Utility
To my life.
I’ll love
No matter what
In life.
Life is good,
I won’t skip
A thank
And
Or
Cheers.
—
listen to love; it is everywhere 💕
Bring me takeaway,
A souvenir that reminds
Meaning of a road.
—
The biggest takeaway of my recent Tapa Brata:
a silver bangle of ANICCA
About ANICCA
Smiling at a weekend
Makes air fresher and lighter.
A place that’s choking—
—
My best friend in Ubud is an active committee member of Bali Spirit Festival; she invites me to enjoy one day free pass after my Tapa Brata for today.
She knows very well I don’t enjoy crowd well yet she insisted that I try to experience an ambiance that might enrich my life. Thank you, I am now in.
I collected my wristband at the entrance, met my friend at the media center she managed then browsed around. A lot I didn’t imagine before. Not only the offered activities and products but also the visitors and participants.
While the activities and products are still easy for me to digest, the way the visitors dress is more shocking to me; half-naked might not be for myself but I can still understand that many bule (the white people in Indonesian language) are half-dressed due to hotter temperature in South East Asia, but almost naked…
Anyway my best friend has changed my curiosity into smiles— very wide smile….
I am enjoying my weekend!
the pink wristband for one day pass – got it free; thank you, De Nov!
the inner entrance inside Puri Padi Hotel where the festival is taking place
map
loving it!
another one
art is dominating the venue — loving it!
hungry? never worried 💝 — more choices other than this one
my favourite!
still heliconia 💝
one of those blinding me (the mildest for my eyes, that almost naked lady with backpack) — this is not a beach please…. 😎 i don’t have the heart to take more pictures 😏 i know what my friend will say to me “that’s why you can’t live in Bali, stay in Singapore, safer for your brain and mind”
stage for the (spiritual) music performance later afternoon — not being arrogant but after so much to learn and unlearn and relearn, to me all is spiritual without label so let me skip this spiritually-labeled music
this is the safest place for me to just drink tea and browse around aromatherapy oil in the market — will spend my time here until I meet my friend again ❣️
on a beanie bag under a young durian tree 💝
will i be back next time? 😁 Yoda said “your path you must decide, Jedi” 😂
Knowing who’s within
Behind an unlocked door. Who?
Look at the mirror
—
Loving kindness doesn’t belong to one particular religion. It is not a domain, it is universal. Thanks for the consistent reminder about it.
May all beings be happy.
Salaam.
Pak Merta Ada with 7 of 32 students in his 881st Tapa Brata — thank you, Bapak 🙏🏼
Life is just like this:
A line with two ends. Circle—
Choose the best angle.
—-
They released us from the silence on May 5 at 11am before lunch time and gave us our gadgets back at 4pm. We were so excited to talk than to play the gadgets; we gathered in the dining hall and shared what we experienced during the noble silence.
We didn’t die without gadgets, no we didn’t. Yet we don’t die because of gadgets, either. Gadgets are just a tool to use wisely.
Each of us couldn’t thank more for everything.
May all beings be happy.
Salaam.
Pak Merta, our meditation teacher
Pak Kourma — our daily instructor
Pak Souca — our daily caretaker 🙏🏼
our last session of meditation was loving kindness meditation for daily life; the video camera was prepared for sharing session at the end
May 5 is today.
This is my second Tapa Brata and both of them are special. My first in 2018 was special because Pak Merta Ada’s teacher (Merta Ada is my health meditation teacher) a Buddhist high priest visited his retreat center and gave us blessings. This second one is because we found that May 5 is his birthday! He was born on May 5, 1957 — a long journey of a meditation teacher and healer.
Someone is also celebrating his birthday across the ocean. May 5 becomes more special today this time. A journey of a silent traveler.
Happy birthday Pak Merta and dear KU. Both of you have a special place in my heart.
For Pak Merta, we immediately prepared a green sarung rangrang. For KU I thoughtfully prepared a poem.
—-
Alone the bird flies
From a nest on a tall tree
It knows where home is.
🙏🏼
May 5 2023 is when the biggest moon rises this year; Waisak (Vesak) is already celebrated in some countries (on May 6 in other countries) — my meditation teacher is celebrating his birthday, another life teacher of mine is celebrating his
an “emergency” birthday present for Pak Merta Ada from our class, wrapped in a beautiful fancy paper from the nearest small shop nearby to wrap a sarung rangrang I originally bought for my additional spread and table cloth — what a beautiful togetherness in this meditation class 💝
Alone the bird flies
To a nest on a tall tree.
She knows where home is.
—-
there is love in wing — trust the wind and the direction 💝
There’s a song to sing
With no other notes but Do,
In two tones: high, low.
—-
keep doing it in high and low
A red hibiscus
Stares at the sun, nods at night.
Counting her blessings—
—-
red hibiscus
If time tells the truth,
What time is it? Light is dim,
Only silhouette
—-
it takes time to colour
Is there her story
In history? Or others’?
A time to ponder—
—-
relief in Rumah Makan Ayam Kadewatan
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