Being Human

I thought I am kind
But no,
Dogs are kinder.
I thought I am strong
But no,
Dogs rock my heart.
I thought I am me
But not
Yet.
Dogs know who they are,
They live as dogs
As they are.
I live as what I want to be,
Even
When being inhumane human
Is what gives me benefits.

—-

watched this movie in today’s flight and cried — how dogs’ life is more genuine than mine🙏🏼

Haw! 💝

Clay But Not A Kendi

Clay art, Beloved,
Hugged by earth, hardened by sun
Livened by heaven—

In Java island clay was commonly used not only to make art work but also as material to make kitchenware, eating utensils, plant pots, etc. Kasongan, Yogyakarta is one of famous villages of clay work industry in which different types of clay art and utensils are mass produced or customised as per buyers’ request.

One clay utensil that I often used in my childhood was kendi, a clay jug used to contain drinking water – it makes drinking water smell subtly earthy and feels cooly fresh. Children would dispense water from the jug to glass to drink; adult would usually just lift the kendi slightly above mouth level and dispense the water directly to their open mouth without touching the tip of the kendi mouth to their mouth — whoa so difficult to explain!

Kendi is not however commonly used as the function is now replaced by plastic containers and refrigerator. It is now mostly used in Javanese traditional ceremony or in some households that still want to keep some traditional way of life. I prepare 5 kendi to compliment the fridge in my Javanese home — 5 kendi are ready before the dining table is ready 😁

kendi – used to contain drinking water at home, outside the gate of Javanese houses (for passers by to drink when thirsty), in the field, almost everywhere

Kendi is actually an acronym (kerata basa in Javanese grammar) of “kendalining diri” (kendalining: control, diri: self) or self control. In Javanese culture kerata basa is used to tie a good teaching to what people is doing. So, practically kendi is not a personal utensil like spoon and fork, anyone can share it. Through the name Javanese know that using kendi, there shall be some self control applied. When someone drinks directly from the clay jug, one should do it carefully to minimise the risk of dropping the kendi and break it; and not greedily gulp all water as other family members or friends also need fresh water in that hot day.

Culturally (at least according to Greek mythology and Quran) human being’s physical is created from clay —like kendi— that is given soul by the Source and so we are breathing. So it is natural that human beings are fundamentally attached to earth. Yet how much ever human beings want to stay as firm, strong, young, beautiful like the clay coming from earth, it is not possible. There is breathing that fans the “fire of life” in the clay body and when it stops “fanning”, the clay body stops functioning.

Can’t live forever, some like to play “forever pretending”. Pretending to be young or beautiful or firm with plastic surgery. Pretending to be happy with some drugs. Pretending to be more precious than others with fake luxury and conspiracy. Pretending this and that.

Ah! That game! That’s fun indeed! Yet it is not doable for me. Being human is not an easy job, pretending makes it even difficult and complicated and unnecessary. So please count me out. 💃🏽

Hey! If some people want to live forever or stay young, firm, strong, beautiful and fully functional; they’d better be a kendi. 😂

Salaam….

we are too clay art work who will someday be bodily back to earth, while some part will “evanesced”, be absorbed back to the source – before the time, I’ll keep this self enhanced to being human in joy and glee humbly and originally 💝

The Present

Of being human:
Letting others be human
Although for a while.

If only human being is being human, giving up other predicates just for a while. If they give up the wrong concept of being religious, maybe no one will need to say “I’ll do whatever I want” because everyone respects everybody.

Humanity, Human, humanity.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Present_(2020_film)

Being Neighbours & Banana

What’s being neighbours?
Readily help and share with;
Willing to be, too—

My homebase starts materializing. Yay! It is in Yogyakarta, a small city that is socio-culturally integrated (different ethnic, religion and political groups are well blended), not so crowded and modern (sayonara, Jakarta!), with existing international airport, etc, etc, etc. And one most important thing is good friends are living there.

I always love to be and to have good and reliable neighbour(s). Those good friends will be my neighbours from whom I will get help and support when needed and who are willing to get helps and supports from me. They are not in the same housing complex but still in the same city.

For the past four days my menu has been all about banana. Banana for breakfast. Banana for lunch. Banana for dinner. Banana either cooked or just eaten not cooked. How much ever I felt bored with banana, I had to finish the banana because neighbours confirmed of not liking and wanting banana. Their expressions of “oh that banana?”, “banana hahaha”, “ummm banana but…” left a tiny puncture on my poverty pride. Maybe next time I’ll share gold or cash and see if the puncture moves to another point hahaha…

My “active neighbours” said to me it is not so common to share food with “any neighbours” nowadays. Or, they want to give but they don’t want to accept. Yes, yes, they are so right. I learnt another lesson about this people.

My so called “active neighbours” nowadays are the cleaning services and security guards with whom I can share food and wishes freely. Hey, hey I never share left over, all food is either cooked by me or packed from stores/restaurants purposefully for them. Respect to all my active neighbours. 🙏🏼

When I shared the pictures of those cooked banana in the Instagram and how much I’d love to share the banana (cooked or not cooked) with neighbours, my neighbours-will-be in Yogyakarta gave welcoming comments including they would love to share their cookings too, and that alone has made me confident of moving to that city and hopefully living comfortably there in the (not so near) future.

Sometimes I feel that I don’t belong to this place. Yet I know I have to be here for some time before leaving these things behind and enjoy being a human living side by side with others without other temporary identity; just being me, being human.

I know it will happen, not very soon; but it will happen. Now I am happy with this temporary identity and want to be a good neighbour for anyone who is willing to be my neighbour.

One more thing: I’ll grow banana in the future homebase and cook the best banana recipe and share it with neighbours there! 😂

May all beings be happy.

second day of cooked banana – the first day was banana cake but not so nice to take picture of, I also took my vitamin with un-cooked banana on those two days 😩
third day of banana; aside from this I took my vitamin with un-cooked banana and ate one after the main course at lunch
last batch of banana on fourth day; I also took my vitamin with an un-cooked banana and ate the last one un-cooked and celebrated my freedom from banana! 🤩

The Guesthouse – (poem by Rumi)

The Guesthouse

This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness, some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows, who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture, still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice, meet them at the door laughing
and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.


This poem was one of those discussed in the Self Discovery course I enrolled in Scotland.

So hard and torturing for my empty head that always craves for intelligence.
So intense for my empty heart that always craves for drama.
So beautiful when we read and contemplated it collectively in the classroom.
So enriching~
Awakening the sleeping giant in the corner of my Soul.

And I was so amazed that part of the poem is recited in one of songs of my favourite band Coldplay entitled “Kaleidoscope”. Enjoy!

Thank you, Rumi for waking me up with your words loaded with divine love.