Church – Coldplay

[Verse 1]
What can I tell you?
When I’m with you, I’m walking on air
Watching you sleeping there, yeah
But what can’t I get through?
And for everyone, everywhere
You’re answering every prayer

[Chorus]
And when you’re riding a wave
Oh, won’t you ride that wave to me?
When you’re setting your sail
Oh, can I be your seventh sea?
When you’re riding a wave
Oh, when you’re riding a wave

[Bridge]
‘Cause when I’m hurt
Then I’ll go to your church
‘Cause when I’m hurt
Then I’ll go to your church

[Instrumental]

[Chorus]
When you’re riding a wave
Oh, won’t you ride that wave to me?
When you’re riding a wave

[Vocalizing in Arabic by Norah Shaqur]
أبي يا الله يا قادر، لماذا تركتني؟
أبي يا الله يا قادر
حرية يا الله
محبة يا الله

[Outro]
(Ooh, ooh, ooh)
(Ooh, ooh, ooh)
I worship in your church, baby, always
I worship in your church, all the seven days (Ooh, ooh, ooh)
I praise and praise
(Ooh, ooh, ooh)
(Ooh, ooh, ooh)

 

 

Caged Bird – free verse

My father had a black starling.
It loved eating kepok* banana – no, had no choice.
It sang – no, cried
It danced – no, nervous
It entertained our guests – no, tried to escape
It slept peacefully – no, dreamed nightmares days and nights
It did happily – no, a prisoner.

The cage was wires and wood.
We hoped it could talk.

Our family moved
To a much smaller home.
Our starling got neglected
How much I can feel the guilty is like a teary moment to a bloody heart!

The black starling got a home
Bigger:
My mother’s relative.

It loved eating kepok* banana – no, had no choice.
It sang – no, cried
It danced – no, nervous
It entertained our guests – no, tried to escape
It slept peacefully – no, dreamed nightmares days and nights
It did happily – no, a prisoner.

The cage was wires and wood, half we gave to it.
We hoped it could talk.

If you are dead, dear Black Starling,
Be in a peaceful moment.
Fly with your beautiful wings, black and shiny!
Feed your life with all the fresh memories.
Forget all the cages and bars.
Be the air
Be the vapour
Be the atmosphere
Be our silent guidance to the freedom out of this cage.

Thank you for your will to be our prisoner
Thank you for your sincerity to be our exhibition
Thank you for your sacrifice to feed our ego
Thank you for your life to complete our purity.

See you across the bridge.
You’ve met him, right?
Tell him you forgive us.

Yours truly,

Me

Shanghai – Dec. 15, 2018 – 12:05 noon is here

img_1737

Hari Kartini

Siang tadi seorang teman mengirimkan pesan whatsapp, bunyinya: “Bagaimana kamu memaknai Hari Kartini?” Pertanyaan kok berat-berat gitu to ya? Akhirnya kujawab “Bentar, asah batu akik dulu baru bisa jawab.”

Beberapa tahun lalu mudah rasanya memaknai sesuatu, gampang sekali mengucapkan kata-kata baik lisan maupun tulisan. Ada di tulisan saya ini: .

Nah, tahun ini pertanyaan tentang makna Hari Kartini justru merangsang rangkaian pertanyaan di benak: sudah benarkah pengetahuan sejarah tentang Kartini? Sejauh mana surat-surat yang dikompilasi itu menceritakan kisah yang sesungguhnya? Apakah memang emansipasi wanita itu yang seperti dikonsepkan berbagai corong toa bernama media?

Nggak bisa dibahas di sini — sebab nggak semangat nulisnya. Tapi masih ada jalan untuk memaknai Hari Kartini demi mencari jawaban yang lebih jujur: dengan mencari tahu kehidupan Eyang Kartini secara proporsional (bukan lagi menurut Pram atau Imron atau penulis lainnya), memahami arti emansipasi.

Ok, mari kita mulai….

Emansipasi berasal dari kata emancipate yang artinya “memerdekakan, membebaskan”. Sebebas apa yang kita bisa? Sebebas apa yang kita mau? Sebebas apa yang kita perlu?

Eyang Kartini bebas naik dokar pergi ke luar pagar walau harus didampingi. Dia masih surat-menyurat dengan sahabat penanya – jaman itu belum ada email, jadi dia suruh-suruh orang juga buat kirim surat ke kantor pos kali ya. Dia juga memodali pengusaha perabot jati berukir walau tak mencapai kesuksesan layaknya konglomerat – kalau nggak dari suami atau orangtuanya kayaknya Kartini nggak ada duit (nggak kerja boooow…). Tapi ingat, dia masih mau menjadi priyayi, mengikut tradisi Jawa dipersunting lelaki priyayi dan rela dimadu. Di sisi lain (mungkin) dibanding Eyang Sartika yang dari Jawa Barat Eyang Kartini kalah egaliternya. Eyang Kartini masih kurang terbebaskan, kalah termerdekakan daripada Eyang Sartika. So, sebebas apa yang Kartini bisa atau mau atau perlu? Itu tergantung bagaimana kita ingin menakarnya, berdasarkan pengetahuan yang kita gali dan nilai yang kita anut.

Sampai sekarang aku masih percaya ada kisah kecil tentang Eyang Kartini yang tak tersampaikan bahwa dia tetap bahagia jadi orang Jawa, tidak menyesal menjadi orang yang terpenjara di balik tembok kadipaten…. Walau di beberapa suratnya pada mevrow Belanda dia mengeluhkan tentang betapa sedihnya melihat nasib kaumnya (baca: perempuan Jawa). Dan lalu, berdasarkan sejarah yang dipaparkan oleh media itu sebagian wanita Indonesia getol memperjuangkan kemerdekaannya sampai ada juga yang kebablasan. Kebablasan? Oops!

Maafkan aku, mungkin tak ada juga kata atau esensi kebablasan karena kebablasan itu tentang takaran dan takaran itu bisa berbeda atas matra waktu, ruang dan lain-lain.

Ngelantur…. Jadi maknanya apa dong?

Baiklah. Lebih baik aku mencari batas kemerdekaan karena sesungguhnya sebaik-baik pemahaman tentang kemerdekaan adalah ketika kita telah melengkapinya dengan pemahaman tentang batas-batas.

Repot ngurus kemerdekaan Eyang Kartini sebagai wanita Jawa kuno….
…. Karena sejatinya jiwanya telah merdeka.

Singapura – 21 April 2015 – 9:10pm

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