I never expect a teacher to be perfect yet I never want a teacher (who claim her/himself) teacher to tak about what’s (s/he considers) not better than her/him.
Yes, I’ve “ordained” that my primary teacher is one, that that I’ve listened to & read since I was a high schooler with big respect and trust because his life is well verified and he is consistent about what he’s fought for– those underprivileged in my beloved country. He’s been physically ill and unable to directly greet us. And that was probably one reason that I tried to find another teacher as there are bits and pieces that I might gain from a class with teacher rather than reading alone. Other than that I had one discussion group.
Yet I could not ordain this new teacher to be a primary. Not because he’s not intelligent or scientifically resourceful. He is very much; however, this honored person could not stop talking about other people that one thinks not better, not right, not exclusive, not right, not this, not that. I’ve been in every week and in every meeting there is always word to highlight how others outside are misled.
No, I can’t make this one a primary teacher. This one is as ordinary as others, as me– yet as he is very intelligent I still make this one source of bits and pieces.
No, I don’t hate this one. I just can’t accept fully because of the 60% quality that I can’t see in one. I don’t tell my friend by whom I was connected to this one. I appreciate her kindness and generosity for this connection; yet I’ve found her to be like this teacher: others outside are not right….
Life is so perfectly imperfect; and I’m a consistently imperfect student of life.
Thank you, dear Beloved for giving me extraordinary and ordinary teacher so I can see both perfection and imperfection in myself.
September was good. She showed me teacher who likes to underestimate others outside the class through humble words. She also sent me a friend who is so angelic that I felt uncomfortable to be near her.
Both look perfect in their own place. The teacher is regarded as very scientifically resourceful one– no deficiency of knowledge. The friend is regarded as an angelic one– no stain in her soul.
I’m a human being so I need a perfect teacher whose ethics is at least 50% of one’s quality; the other 50 is shared between knowledge and clear thinking. Because wisdom is not only what’s memorised by teacher but what’s becoming daily conduct as a role model.
I’m a human being so I need an imperfect friend whose flexibility is enough for us to laugh together. Because the rest is not about whether the gathering ia full of wise words or sacred knowledge, but how a friend is welcomed howsoever dirty and low the conduct is; otherwise we are not friends.
rike jokanan 
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