There was so much time
When we were together.
There was so much time
When we were separated.
There's time.
Yes, there's still time,
Ibu.
ingat ibu….
Ibu
Tag: letting go
Probability of My Life Math
I stumbled upon this video in YouTube, my favourite online platform: How to Find a Spouse & Keep…. No, it’s not about that I’m religious. If the question is if I’m religious, the answer is never yes. My thinking is any idea, the responsible & fair one, coming from any faith on earth.
So the female Muslim scholar gave some advices & enlightment about marriage for women in 40’s (& above). Dr Haifa Younis calmly touched this heart & strengthened what I’ve thought about for so long. Marriage–
No, I’m not talking about the content only (marriage at 49’s or above). Connecting it to Probablity Theory in ‘ath seems more interesting to me.
If probability theory is about which ball of specific colour I will get if I blindly take one ball from a bag of hundreds or thousands or even millions of balls of different colours; life is about the bag with so many balls of colours (probabilities) decided for me based on my preparation & luck! While I can have my best preps, I still pray for the luck to take sides of me– and what colour granted to me is a combination of my preps & nature’s luck.
And yet that’s also not the point I see in the Mathematics probability. The most important thing of probability in life (to me) is about taking the bag as a whole without throwing away any balls within– any colours stay, fully accepted as the bag is handed to me. Any balls are welcomed guests to me; none is rejected when the ball is assigned for me. And that’s what I think about all probabilities in life incl but not limited to marriage.
There was time when I said no to marriage simply because of experiencing bitter & irresponsible rejection from a man back then. Yet after moving to Singapore and meeting sooo many mature & open-minded heads, I changed my mind. I became open to marriage, well preparing everyday through learning how to be a female human being and hoping for the best without pushing hard.
Preps & Luck!
If the ball is dropped for me, it is deliberately & lovingly welcome. Yet I don’t want to hurt my life to get the ball rolling.
Let life take care of it.
Probability theory in Math helps me much to accept life as it is.
Life is lighter with acceptance and a shade of letting go.
Thank you…. As always….
thank you, Ma’am for the kind reminder
Generosity
Love teaches me to be generous
Of admiration and hopes and dreams.
However, fear drives me to be stingy
Of admiration and hopes and dreams.
You're a pendulum I'm hugging, Beloved
Swinging me from
Love to
Fear.
I know my wish won't change anything.
You constantly move to balance
Your own generosity,
And my imbalance is just a side effect,
Not your fault--
I'm almost drowning,
Your stream is so strong.
I'm more and more deeply pulled
To where I belong:
A smile of generosity,
Where love is abundant,
Fear dormant.
letting go is making sure love is abundant and fear dormant
Rest In Peace, Sweet Soul
Tears are footsteps
To friendship
Or
Away from it.
Tears of joy,
Tears of sadness,
Tears of letting go
Repeatedly
Until letting go
Becomes breathing.
female, young, kind, intelligent, high integrity, humorous , pretty! A loving wife, mother, friend 💕
Rest in peace, dear Laksmi 🌸
#utangrasa
On A Rope
A rope might help
To travel to the other side,
Yet it might be not.
Being in the other side
Is not always wise
As a wise is
That that means
Decision for the right.
Right time
Right place
Right person
That might be
Not right:
Not always right amount
Not always right distance
Not always right calculation.
This rope is right
Only when it is about
Knowing that pulling or releasing
Are both hurting
Right where and when it is decided to.
this?
this one is wiser for now 💕
might not be the right one, yet being relaxed and easy is sometimes the right one for now — i just don’t want to think too much; wisdom is not always hard 💕
Remote & Intimate
💕
work from remote in people’s thought
it is more than enough to have this in my work from remote to accompany my mother and….
…. to take off celebrating what good about life – one of them is he whose love to life is like cool water 😁 💕
Pink Rose
As pink
As rose
My heart
Chants you
Forever
As love
That throbs
Through blood
And tears
And breath
And words
In heart
And body
And mind
And spirit
And soul
you might not like pink rose but this is the most beautiful petals with which i can sprinkle with the least tears for your no-turn-back journey 💕
our last Bali tour with Ocka was our most testing trip — the rain and storm and damn how would you stop driving every three hours and said “Mbak, i am hungry i can die driving” 😁
our love is about laughter and wit ♥️
my broken heart in romance has turned to a minuscule particle compared to my broken heart of losing my beloved nephew
rike jokanan 
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