Flower is blooming In a dry valley. No grudge— Just beauty and life
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Flower is everywhere as beauty is. Find it in you.

graphs of my Universe
Flower is blooming In a dry valley. No grudge— Just beauty and life
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Flower is everywhere as beauty is. Find it in you.

Beyond layered skies Is beauty unknown, my Love I’ll never give up.
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This I wishes happiness to that you across the ocean although the you never knows….
You’re a paradox. Close but distant; tangibly Impalpable sphere—
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I know you’re around. I just know. I trust you, Beloved. You smell like mid spring, sound like jazz, taste like sugar cane, feel like breeze, but not sure look like what….
May all beings be happy.
Is it love or pride To push through? Fortunately Engineerable—
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Some choose love over pride, some pride over love. No one can truly win over either because love and pride can be carved on to two faces of a coin. Ones need to toss the coin and get any appearance of one face not by luck. It is well designed, constructed and furnished.
How?
Culturally obviously….
True, Love. As long as you are being human, you can never absolutely win over one over another (the other?). It’s about how you grow through all dimensions in which you are: physically, mentally, spiritually, socially, economically, politically.
Accept it.
May all beings be happy.

Mount Bromo, where sun cheerfully rises
What is after this? What shall we be transformed, Love? Trust me, Beloved.
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Trust is my key. It is with what I address what I can’t see behind the curtains. Be it good or bad, the journey is ahead. God bless each breath I take and the air I release….
May all beings be happy.

Cold weary corner Keeps things alive. It’s a choice To put some colours.
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Often time one puts everything in one place and let the other space vacant because it is easier to get whatever within reach. It is good, yet sometimes one should follow the heart to reach out those beyond spatiality.
Re-arrange and better manage one’s self.

Where are you now, Love? Home is around the corner. Turn right and be there.
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One of good friends sent her work of art, compiling her memories of Sulawesi trips into a sweet calling-home clip.
Thank you, Mbak Adek for reminding me that I’ve got home, a beautiful one. A beautiful home is a heaven on earth and in heart.
Home is where heaven is. Good friends make you realise that it’s real!
Salaam.
This video was produced by Adek Azhar. She is a cat lover, a happy mother and grandmother, a good friend, a crazy traveler, a senior journalist as best description of her. Can’t wait to travel with her after pandemic in our small group of awkward travelers! 💞
Colours adorn day— Connect it to a mood which Is the token. Not?
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Flowers can give positive vibes in the room and even in the house. Working from home takes more effort to stay vibrant as for at least 8 hours some employees won’t be in “real contact” with other human beings; online platform can’t fully accommodate the actual need of interaction among human beings.
One of my colleagues in China who has the same interest in flower with me sometimes sends pictures of her today’s flower display. Last week she sent white peony. She knows I really really really want to have peony, which isn’t available in Singapore.
To some ladies flower is a medicine, curing some disturbed moods.
May all beings be happy.



What’s being neighbours? Readily help and share with; Willing to be, too—
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My homebase starts materializing. Yay! It is in Yogyakarta, a small city that is socio-culturally integrated (different ethnic, religion and political groups are well blended), not so crowded and modern (sayonara, Jakarta!), with existing international airport, etc, etc, etc. And one most important thing is good friends are living there.
I always love to be and to have good and reliable neighbour(s). Those good friends will be my neighbours from whom I will get help and support when needed and who are willing to get helps and supports from me. They are not in the same housing complex but still in the same city.
For the past four days my menu has been all about banana. Banana for breakfast. Banana for lunch. Banana for dinner. Banana either cooked or just eaten not cooked. How much ever I felt bored with banana, I had to finish the banana because neighbours confirmed of not liking and wanting banana. Their expressions of “oh that banana?”, “banana hahaha”, “ummm banana but…” left a tiny puncture on my poverty pride. Maybe next time I’ll share gold or cash and see if the puncture moves to another point hahaha…
My “active neighbours” said to me it is not so common to share food with “any neighbours” nowadays. Or, they want to give but they don’t want to accept. Yes, yes, they are so right. I learnt another lesson about this people.
My so called “active neighbours” nowadays are the cleaning services and security guards with whom I can share food and wishes freely. Hey, hey I never share left over, all food is either cooked by me or packed from stores/restaurants purposefully for them. Respect to all my active neighbours. 🙏🏼
When I shared the pictures of those cooked banana in the Instagram and how much I’d love to share the banana (cooked or not cooked) with neighbours, my neighbours-will-be in Yogyakarta gave welcoming comments including they would love to share their cookings too, and that alone has made me confident of moving to that city and hopefully living comfortably there in the (not so near) future.
Sometimes I feel that I don’t belong to this place. Yet I know I have to be here for some time before leaving these things behind and enjoy being a human living side by side with others without other temporary identity; just being me, being human.
I know it will happen, not very soon; but it will happen. Now I am happy with this temporary identity and want to be a good neighbour for anyone who is willing to be my neighbour.
One more thing: I’ll grow banana in the future homebase and cook the best banana recipe and share it with neighbours there! 😂
May all beings be happy.



Defined with honour, Integrated in mindset: Sublime happiness—
Having beautiful dreams everyday for one week is blessings in a row. The best of mine recently was finding so many ruby stones while walking home. When waking up, sense of calmness and relief were present yet at the same time a question of whether happiness was here. In the dream I still had to polish the ruby to shine, but at least those stones were given to me.
A couple of years ago I joined a noble silence in Bali, a one-week-no-gadgets-no-books-no-media-no-talk-just-be-with-yourself-although-living-in-a-dorm-with-other-people-and-be-vegetarian-plus-meditation-almost-the-whole-day. A top luxury for someone like me
Not about the noble silence, but a lot of things came back to me especially on how happiness is perceived by different people with different social, cultural, economical backgrounds.
In that noble silence there attended many different people from all walks of life: someone working in a prominent firm in NYC, fashion designer from Paris with one’s daughter, a family from Australia, a rich flight attendant of one of the best airline on earth, a rich person naming himself a party animal, a young start up owner who once talked in front of a president of the super power, an entrepreneur from Spain with one’s daughter, all others I can’t remember who because we practically didn’t introduce each other further. We stared and smiled with each other maybe once for that one week because each was simply busy with one’s self.
I was surprised that those who appeared so proud and happy and unshakeable finally shared in the closing ceremony how they struggled in life and how the noble silence brought realisation to them — simply by befriending with themselves. We were broken with different reasons: family matters, public cases, friendship, romance, work, trauma, fear of things and so on and so forth.
One more thing, struggling is not about how big the problem is but it is about how something disturbs the state of one’s clear mind. Nothing is defined too small when it shakes the boat.
I miss another noble silence, one of the biggest luxuries of life.
May all beings be happy.

Carefree day, true day; Away from pressure, good day— Sing the song, flutter!
Some days are just so enjoyable even when you’ve got bad things to get rid of from the very head. Why is that?
Perhaps, yes perhaps it is just because some people joyfully make the right click with their own selves.
Salam….
Rolled dice, Beloved Can cheat or give you luck. Choose When to stop or lose.
Pandhawa Lima (5 brothers of Pandhawa) and the Kurawa (100 = 99 male and 1 female, all born from one time pregnancy), both were since childhood to maturity in a forever competition, rivalry and finally Kurusetra war!
I first read Mahabharata, Baratayudha when I was 10 years old. Comic series by R.A. Kosasih. I bet you’ll like them – unfortunately only in Bahasa Indonesia.
I always interpreted the rivalry between those two clans as a battle between good and evil. That everything happening between them was because Pandhawa wanted to eradicate evil, celebrated the good, wanted to make sure the kingdom was well governed, people were well protected with good welfare. Hmm…. I mean yes it was…. But is that the only angle to picture the stories? What was the cause of the war?
Until one day…. My brain was twisted and started to re-read between the lines. Since then I have agreed with those thinking that what Pandhawa had done was to fight for the right of one beloved woman, Drupadi. In Javanese culture Drupadi was the dear wife of Yudhistira (the oldest of the five) and the sister in law of the four (Bima, Arjuna, Nakula and Sadewa).
Drupadi was harassed by Dursasana in a betting party where Yudhistira let her the ultimate bet after he had spent everything the kingdom had in the game. Yudhistira was a highly respected king yet his weakness was one of them his liking to betting and gambling.
So, the epic war between the good Pandhawa and the evil Kurawa is to show how men respect and defend the women around them.
How would those who have read this epic story can’t see this significant line?!
I’m blessed to be a woman. And I hope someday I’ll be with a man who has the dignity to take a side of me when I have no one to defend, has the courage to respect a “weaker creature” when he has other options not to.
Happy International Women’s Day
It is not a one-day holiday or celebration, it is an everyday celebration to stay dignified and loving at the same time as a woman.
May all beings be happy.

Not my job to preach; Simply sharing what is sensed. Don’t get it wrong.
No, no…. If people think what writers write is only about themselves, that’s not the case. The writers are just like us, human beings who get inspired by everything they sense.
😌

This love’s, Love never Dubious. It’s the window Clouded with questions.
Had a weekend call with one of my best friends and always ended up with haha hihi and hehe…. Joyful and fun! Yet love is always a-must topic. And today’s love’s topic was that it is never wrong —both the feeling and whom we love. It is questionable when we expect the same from those that we love.
Painful! Indeed. Like getting beaten by snow flakes in the coldest winter on the way to the warm summer. Whether you survive through the journey or you return to the previous path.
Let’s walk on!
May all beings be happy.

Sun yawns. Morning comes No earlier, no later Without a mantra.
I had a chat with one best friend about mantra. Long story short, we agreed that everyone can have one’s own mantra that works wonder as long as the mantra is recited with all one’s heart. Then we decided to compose our own mantra to help boost materialising the dreams. One of them? To charm our own heart that is very difficult to tame— two stubborn ladies.
Then we exchanged mantra. Hers was straight forward containing what she wanted to happen and recited like rap song. Mine was a melodious song. Tried my best luck to sing it and sent the recording to her. Such a good day to laugh joyfully. And?
And we agreed that we both are funny and don’t have to worry about mantra; just need to believe that dreams will come true like the sun that welcomes the day from the east on time. Mantra is the right motivation and with it, what we both need to do is just to work on what we want to achieve.
Hey, hey! Our mantra were actually not too bad. We might release a mantra album someday. 😝

Life’s flame, Beloved Gaseous, burning, glowing. Choose your own spectrum.
What is urip iku urup? It is literally “life is flame”.
Most Javanese describe “urip iku urup” as “your life should be beneficial and/or helpful for others” like flame coming out from fire giving surrounding the light, saving others from the dark. Always do good things. Help others. Don’t make a noise. Don’t disturb others. Those are very normal advices coming from the Javanese elders. Not bad, but to me it is a jumbo burden to always being good and being nice and saying yes and not complaining when life is sometimes tough and forcefully dredging out negativity from the very gut.
I though highly respect this urip iku urup through my own interpretation: “life should be full of passion”. Only those with passion, zeal, enthusiasm, energy, commitment, excitement, fondness, zest, keeness, avidity, gusto, glee, joy can bring the most benefits of what they do towards others. Not so much different from what normal Javanese interpret, just that I prefer seeing things from how life radiates from within self rather than how it is measured through others’ benefitting my life. Simply put: I’ll do super best; if you get the benefit, that’s good for you. If not, tell me and I’ll make it better.
If you choose to be a teacher, be the best version of teacher you are. If you want to be a researcher, be the best version of researcher you are. If you decide to be no one, be the best no one in the world! There is a spirit of learning from the scratch and striving for perfection. And there is a sense of originality.
Flame has different colours, depending on the heat and intensity of the fire. Many think red flame is the scariest perhaps because it is the one bellowing in rage, eating up property in fire. However, it is the most external part yet actually of the the lowest temperature. It is the tongue, not the voice. The blue represents the hottest flame — it is the gas burning, the higher temperature, the innner most, the closest to the core. It’ll cook things faster but quiter! It is the vocal cord, not the voice.
In life people should choose what flame they want to represent in life. It is whether they want to stand out and be the red, symbolising the intensity of the whole fire! Or, they want to be outstanding as the blue and not arguably be the hottest support to the reds around. Both are ok. Just remember not to extinguish each other, Red and Blue. People need to choose their own roles in community. Some people are good at performing at the stage. Some are good at executing. Some are good at initiating changes and pushing from the back of the course. Some might be good at all but I doubt one person can be good at three perfectly at teh same course. If one thinks so, one will either overkill the people around one or kill one’s self.
Within self, red and blue is about act of maturity or choice of expression in many different occasions to face different situations with different people. How people process their experience and mold the wisdom within is a hidden flame. Let them do. Their timing is theirs, not yours. Sometimes they want to show their red, the other time they show their blue.
Flame is alive inside and outside! Be a flame while we live! You’re the voice!
If you listen to this song, you’ll see that urip iku urup -the so called Javanese local wisdom- can be found everywhere. Local wisdom is never local, it is universal value expressed differently by many in different places.
Salaam….
Note about the writing and the song: don’t bother, it is my interpretation 😊
The hidden ID Brings confidence and courage: Covert exercise—
Wearing mask has good impact mentally: especially bringing more confidence to do what’s wanted to do (responsibly). Wearing it though might also give some rather unpleasant experience such as not breathing comfortably, needing to nod or squint eyes to show we are smiling, foggy glasses, etc.
While now we are mandated to wear masks once going out of home, hope someday soon mask is mandated only in some area.
Now let’s take this as a short training to be confident and to give up identity for a while for the sake of protecting each other. Training in and out!
Let’s mask ourselves in style. 😷
Tips of wearing mask: not too tight, find masks that give space in front of nose and mouth; disposable is the best but reusable is good enough (wear each based on where you go and whom you meet); change everyday for reusable or twice a day of you need more comfort; wash the reusable after use the soonest possible, sprinkle mask with some herbal oil to bring good air (peppermint and lemon are good choice for breathing); cute reusable brightens days.
May all beings be happy.

always practice squinting eyes in the lift before meeting people out there 😷
When shoe bites, Stop walking, sit, check the soles. Right foot is bigger!
I bought a pair of shoes through an online platform. No, no, not Cinderella’s shoes. They are a pair of brown flat ballerina. First ballerina shoes after seven years without them. For the past seven years I’ve been wearing flat shoes: sneakers, boots and feminine non ballerina because they are comfortable to walk. Why ballerina? I want to look cute. Let’s laugh together!
So, I tried them to walk around the home and tada! I decided to wear them outside and…. The test came. The right shoe started biting me and unluckily no back heel cushions were inserted. I thought no cushions were needed. As a result the right back of heel got a small cut and disturbed the walk.

It’s fine. At least I had some time of the day with ballerina shoes on, feeling beautiful (in mask, dear…. No one looked at you). Just sharing: now I understand why some beautiful women are willing to hurt their feet wearing those high heels and walking elegantly. They must feel much more beautiful with those much higher-heeled shoes…. 😌
I gave up and stopped at one footwear store to buy a pair of flat, light, white sandals. Life went back to normally beautiful to me…. Yay!

May all beings be happy.
Good time to clean up: Throw away what’s not needed. Unstuff. Travel light.
Reviewing my Pinterest account once again, I found that I’ve been hoarding. At the beginning I thought it was cool to collect all the pictures for reference on some topics. Is that? Yes, to some level. No, to some extent.
But still I like it 😁
Checking my home, that’s more interesting. Too many books and they should be soon given away. Getting older, I feel that reading the phenomena surrounding me is much more interesting and enriching than reading books, except reading some comics as part of my language study. That’s better, too so I can save more for future dream— hope the future still wants me. 🥰
Cleaning starts! Some memories are worth erasing.
May all beings be happy.

Not about the food, More about gluttony. Good! At least I still chew.
I joined “Eat Well Challenge” in which what’s consumed is calculated and what’s burnt is regulated. I thought it would be as simple as submitting what is eaten. Now I see how healthy both my body and brain will be as the calorie calculation include my weighing the ingredients and decision making on what’s best to combine.
The plan to cook duck has twisted a brain. Duck contains a lot of fat, which is the best part of it. Yummy!!! So…. Duck it is! When calculated, the calorie is high and when it is reported to the challenge platform, it is not counted as the expected healthy food…. Ggrrrrh!




Don’t overestimate what’s called healthy eating because the calorie calculation will overwrite all the estimation exactly like when you think expressing love honestly will result in respectful rejection, instead you’ll get ignorance and humiliation.
Thanks God for always leading me to self respect and kindness.
May all beings be happy.
Wind is sent to Cloud Who pours Rain down to Soil. Grow! Seeds inside emerge.
Imagine despair is like the earth longing for rain until suddenly the wind comes pushing lines of clouds that can’t suspend the heavy droplets anymore so turn into rain…. The earth welcomes each of the raindrops happily, hugs each of all seeds which have been buried beneath the dry layers of soil, almost broken, damps and pushes them up above the ground to grow….
Wind…. It takes just one blow of wind to see beautiful colours.
May all beings be happy.

Respect should be earned Not through masks on the back but.... Genuine face on.
If you think I’ve ignored you, Beloved; perhaps you might want to turn around. You’ve had your back to me all this time…. Face the mirror and see who you really are. 💞
Gotcha!!! 😁😘

Loyalty: old-aged, Mined, Rubbed, faceted carbon— 4C through life time.
Many women love diamond with different reasons. Some do because of its beauty. Some do because of its prestige. Some do because of following the trend. Some do just because of spending money on anything seen and wanted. Some do because of what it symbolises…. In fact its value has a wide spectrum like why we love someone.
Diamond is just a type of carbon. Carbon is what’s burnt to cook steak. Carbon is what’s chosen for media to grow orchids. Carbon is activated to be a medication for food poisoning. Or simply think of other things containing carbon!
Diamond though is a certain level of carbon which has been buried between layers of earth for millions of years, tested by the pressure, temperature. It’s hardened, purified, strengthened, crystalised.
4C is a familiar acronym for diamond lovers. These 4 C’s show diamond’s quality.
Imagine a human being is a carbon processing one’s self to be a diamond. Stay regardless the pressure and temperature exposed to you, Self. Once you find you, you’re diamond in the making.
May all beings be happy.
useful link: https://www.bluenile.com
Lammie, Khanyisa, It is the least I can do. Friends are forever When no discrimination. Can I do? Need a try, sure!
Animals have taught me a lot about many things. One of those is unconditional friendship. Lammie and Khanyisa are a sheep and an albino elephant calf who have been friends without asking why their tails are differently shaped and attached, why their hairs are of different colours, why their teeth are of different length…. Language, religion, nationalities, and so on are never problems. They just grass, rest, play together. What a beautiful world!
If you wanna support Lammie and Khanyisa’s unconditional friendship, you can buy a mug with picture of them printed on it. Mine arrived today through DHL, welcoming me at the front door. Happy yay!
Thanks, Lammie and Khanyisa and HERD! You’ve been much smarter than many of my human kind. I’m sending love to you and your family….. 😘😘😘

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