Life pace, Beloved Chosen wisdom, loved glory Of everyday life—
I wish to retire at 52 and will be a person with not too many layers of identity, being a human being living a slower-paced life, contributing to smaller society and community with my own hands with all my heart and soul, respected as I am I am not as I am who is associated to prominent organizations.
One of good friends reminded me to get prepared for that will definitely be a much different life. There won’t be luxurious facilities enjoyed, privilege given, smiles and hand shake or bow. She says it’s gonna be a true life though loved and respected by those with genuine love and respect. No transactional courtesy, all is about friendship and humanity.
When? Still long time to go but short enough because now I live in a fast-paced life.
Time to prepare.
Once retired, I won’t want to be in contact with those who have respected me because of business or money. They should be eliminated from friendship. They will deserve others who have the capacity.
So you need to move
To be happy? Yes. Move to
Your kind heart. Stay. Smile.
I had a group call with some good friends and we asked one favourite friend how she could be always light and calm even when she didn’t have enough materially.
Just as a description about her (with her consent): This kind, humble, strong, cheerful, a bit crazy lady is a widow with two children (both finished their education and are now working to support themselves). Her husband left her without anything for another woman. She works a lot of temporary jobs to survive. She lives in a very small rented house until now. She earns less than USD500 per month. She supports her brother who is physically impaired. Yet she is the one that we run to for advices, wisdom, consolation and she never complains to us, her friends.
She said “Maybe I was born to be happy, happier than all of you hahaha…. Let me put it this way. I’m light because my life is simple. I know I don’t have that much others have and that’s why my happiness measure isn’t the same with theirs. I don’t even think of what you think of to spend a holiday. I know you get upset when your food isn’t good; I think good food is about something edible, clean and filling, not about palate.
And I’m calm because I believe people appreciate me the way I am. Some people think too much about how they look and start behaving pretentiously. I’m not. This is me, carefree, open, comfortable with myself. And I don’t want to hurt others. People might not like it; I just need to be nice and stay away.”
“Are we your friends, Mbak?” We teased her.
“Stupid question! Yes! Because you appreciate me not with money but simply with friendship although you girls can look very ugly when very busy; annoying when very stressed! You just need to go back to this!” She put her right palm on her left upper chest where heart is.
This type of friend makes us real. One who appreciates others not through what is materially defined and knows that one one’s self is appreciated genuinely.
I don’t have to move to Finland or Denmark to be happy. Of course not with nothing. A good laugh and some chocolate (good chocolate I mean) should be the least. Honestly I still want to at least travel there! 🤪
Defined with honour,
Integrated in mindset:
Having beautiful dreams everyday for one week is blessings in a row. The best of mine recently was finding so many ruby stones while walking home. When waking up, sense of calmness and relief were present yet at the same time a question of whether happiness was here. In the dream I still had to polish the ruby to shine, but at least those stones were given to me.
A couple of years ago I joined a noble silence in Bali, a one-week-no-gadgets-no-books-no-media-no-talk-just-be-with-yourself-although-living-in-a-dorm-with-other-people-and-be-vegetarian-plus-meditation-almost-the-whole-day. A top luxury for someone like me
Not about the noble silence, but a lot of things came back to me especially on how happiness is perceived by different people with different social, cultural, economical backgrounds.
In that noble silence there attended many different people from all walks of life: someone working in a prominent firm in NYC, fashion designer from Paris with one’s daughter, a family from Australia, a rich flight attendant of one of the best airline on earth, a rich person naming himself a party animal, a young start up owner who once talked in front of a president of the super power, an entrepreneur from Spain with one’s daughter, all others I can’t remember who because we practically didn’t introduce each other further. We stared and smiled with each other maybe once for that one week because each was simply busy with one’s self.
I was surprised that those who appeared so proud and happy and unshakeable finally shared in the closing ceremony how they struggled in life and how the noble silence brought realisation to them — simply by befriending with themselves. We were broken with different reasons: family matters, public cases, friendship, romance, work, trauma, fear of things and so on and so forth.
One more thing, struggling is not about how big the problem is but it is about how something disturbs the state of one’s clear mind. Nothing is defined too small when it shakes the boat.
I miss another noble silence, one of the biggest luxuries of life.
Language is alive
Even in silence. I guess
It’s ears who discount.
I don’t escape, Beloved.
Just my confidence collapsed....
Space is not distance,
It’s a knot between two hearts.
Imagine two words
Without space: cramped and crowded.
Just never disconnect, Love.
Year end is ready
To summarise lessons learnt
To hand happiness
Over to new one. Welcome,
Self, to realm of connection....
As if I’m not there.
Floating— I’m a drone over
You, who never cares.
Singapore – July 14, 2020 / 20:24
Expectation is like gravity to a plane that is taking off leaving the runway. Fly away to the destination! Expectation will only overkill your dream especially if the one that you want is not the one that can appreciate sincerity.