graphs of my Universe
Rain, don't go away.
There's a clay land to spray, then
I'll welcome what may.
i love rainy season as much as i love autumn as they feel like falling in love everyday; i love other seasons as they feel like dreaming of an upcoming love everyday
💕
Be playful, dear self
At the same time
Be kind.
Be free
To be who
You truly are
Although to do it
You've got to sneak out
For a while.
I won't lose you,
Hey little sweet girl in me.
Trimmed up, Beloved,
A heavy bough of ripe fruits
With nice and light smiles.
heavy week completed with nice and light smiles — alhamdulillah….
happy weekend
💕
Your breath, Beloved,
Reaches me between my breath
And whispers your love.
You touch this heart through ripples
That moves dust from its surface.
clear and true 💕
A tiny feather
Leaves a trace on still water.
Message to the calm--
be true
When love is set free,
It rushes out to fly true
To its home called heart.
be true
September is a best month. 💐
Have a great weekend❣️
make today’s vibe
She can hear silence
Whispering rhythms through the wind.
She then writes the rhymes.
Get rest, Beloved.
You've raced with a packed schedule
That's tamed by weekends.
the drink is “Teh Botol Sosro” the most legendary bottled tea in Indonesia 😘
mini tumpeng for today’s birthday dinner (most components by me) – need to rest my hands after cooking; this weekend is gonna be biking to east coast
Beloved,
It is about whether or not
The path is walked.
Not about prediction,
Not about opinion,
Not about hurting or getting hurt,
Not about giving up,
Not about result.
This journey is
Mine.
The destination is
You.
The end is
Heaven knows.
Today’s dinner
please don’t judge hungry stomach — today was another reading, cooking and eating plus a bit of napping, laundry was missed and will be done tomorrow night after office 😎
this plate is a work of 3-hour labor of an amateur: potato perkedel (potato hash mixed with minced beef), fried rice with corn in Balinese sambal matah & teri kacang (my 1st attempt soooo challenging, too sweet, almost giving up, next time better with different recipe) – yay❣️
i made chicken soup for my own soul and my friend sent me sourdough from her bakery — alhamdulillah….
RAMBUTAN!!! 😍 exotic tropical fruit
It's confusing.
Tell me how
I should love
You.
Is it to shine
As a sun does?
Is it to glow
As a star does?
Is it to reflect
As a moon does?
Is it to pass by
As a comet does?
I'm none of those.
I am now loving
You as the space does,
It is to contain
Your existence,
Embracing what's all
In and about
You.
Tell me how
I should love
You.
RC Gorman’s work of art
Sweat is
Either from hard work
Or from
Nerve.
Feel its particular heat and movement on the skin
To find which.
old that i love the most — i can’t count how many times i tripped and fell with her, just catching or sometimes racing with the wind; i wanted to give it away to my nephew but never happens as i so much love this powerful Blue
my frequent commute buddy when i am not on taxi or bus
colleagues who commute by bikes will shower (again) in the office before starting working because of sweating but i won’t
i let my sweat dry by the AC 😁
biking is in my blood, from elementary until senior high schools and sometimes in uni i did move around by bike — i only totally stopped riding bike when i was working in Jakarta where cars are more preferred even if the traffic is heavy
my friend was in biz trip in London and brought one home for me with much cheaper price compared to Singapore’s — new, lighter and brighter and fancier than Blue but sometimes too shiny for me to move around so she doesn’t get frequent outting; i’ll bring you out more, Red and maybe someday i will give you away to my nephew so you will be ridden more for functional fun
thank you, life for opening my eyes every now and then with or without sweating
A book, Beloved
Soaks a soul in clean water.
Washed off and refreshed--
I read a book by Haemin Sunim, Love for Imperfect Things. It is second book from him I’ve read, the first was When Things Don’t Go Your Way. While the latter felt like diving into my own understanding of life– a set of confirmation of what I’ve done and/or understood in life; the currently read is like a playful garden to me, giving me more space to reinterpret my life based on Haemin Sunim’s point of view.
I’ve stopped reading “heavy books”, those that make me more intelligent with bunches of upgraded sciences and knowledge, more critical towards others’ (different from me), more analytical around my folks (outside work), more rigid in forgiving those “making mistakes”. I am now trying to dull the knife in my mind, I’d love to have curvy corners that will just give slight sensation without wound when bumping or bumped by my fellow human beings.
💕
Yes, I am now a weak book reader, but I am an avid reader of my own heart and life.
This book reminds me that I should be bonding myself to an anchor called compassion in life so whatever happens to or around me, it is always love and kindness that become my basis of judgement and decision.
thank you, Haemin Sunim — how grateful i am to have read this book
Most books I am now attracted to are fiction, short books, those illustrated, colourful, with picture collection. I read some biography but only of my favourite people (now reading Alan Rickman’s).
Not a fan of “self help” books either as I don’t need to be helped, just need to sit together with a company to listen and to be listened to.
every chapter is as powerful as decades of dripping water that forms a smooth hole on a rock 💕
thanks to my favourite person for recommending this book; i wish to see you soon 💕
Continuing reading Haemin Sunim’s next book–
After 40′ swim, I continued Saturday with reading (I’m left behind target of my Goodreads’ 2024 Reading Challenge), cooking then eating. Some instagram checking inserted to check if my bestfriend sent me silly meme and videos to refresh our day–
Weekend, please don’t go too fast. I still have 2 books, cleaning and some laundry to do.
Maybe just one extra hour for tomorrow to be 25…. 😛
tada! today is about reading, cooking and eating — ice cream soon 😍
😍
peanut, garlic, chili, fragrance ginger (kencur)
palm sugar, kefir lime leaves
Good view, Beloved
Gives her bright vibe and clear hope.
Saturday fever--
the view in female outdoor pool shower — Saturday can’t be more fun and brighter with heliconia
If I'm to follow,
It's only to follow you.
Do you mind me to?
the sun, sunflower and a weekend
My life is poetry
I recite in solitude.
As short as Basho's haiku,
As long as Bhagavad Gita--
No ears are to hear,
No critic is to review,
As private as a fetus in the womb, dearly loved--
As hidden as an unexplored cave, well protected--
There will be time when it travels out
To a place called a meadow of flowers
Where words become meaningless,
Senses truthfully shout.
That day I'll recite my life
To that whom I truly endear.
That day I'll sing my song
About the love I truly adhere.
a humble life is a tiny drop of water pushing out ripples on a placid pond– hidden and loved
I wish I know
You better
So there won't be useless tears falling to long for
You.
I wish to meet
You now
So there won't be useless words
Uttered in secret for
You.
I wish to be with
You, too
So there won't be useless thought dancing restlessly for
You.
But I won't force to be with
You soon
As the timing is predestined by and arranged for
You.
counting my falling hair before finally meeting you
💕
two friends see one same thing from different states of existence (a human being and a dog) and explain it in different words — both are right
i feel like i am Snoopy, lucky to have Charlie Brown as a friend
💕
It’s always kindness that makes me believe life is worth fighting for.
Have a good weekend❣️
Everything, dear self
Has its own time, no delay.
There is never doubt.
when my doubt is unbearable, i will open the Quran and ask to be given one answer to my doubt — after some short meditative moment; i will randomly open a page and the first part that i see or point with my forefinger, i will simply take it as the answer
and this is the most recent one when i asked about doubt “…. and He has appointed a term in which there is no doubt.”
it might be a coincidence that the “no doubt” appeared to me when i asked about doubt
it is not a scientific process to make a decision, but i choose to believe it because i don’t want to lose the ability to rely on intuition in time when logic cannot help
it takes practices and acceptance to embrace this simple (speculative) way of making decision, and it takes humility (for a logical person like me) to humbly believe
thank you, Gusti 💕
Comfort zone's, dear self
A clear bubble waits to burst.
Life is just like that.
need warm soup for weekend comfort: veggies n sukiyaki beef in dashi stock, tempe + torch ginger — imperfect combination but i love both 😍
need a second helping of soup and fruit before back curling up in bed reading then hopefully falling to sleep
Pondering where this tiny love story means,
Counting breathing through hope in highs and lows.
In I breath fragrance of rose, out jasmine.
How beautiful! No one but a key knows.
The breeze sometimes softly shakes the heartbeat.
The river flows tampering a quiet mind.
The fire ignites a heart that longs to meet.
Under the drizzle the sun warmly shines.
Beloved, is it you she's waiting for?
Is it her you're letting in your grand throne?
The cloud hanging disguises sweet flavor,
Or the flavor is love and love alone?
Love is beautiful with cloudy sweet dream.
If time allows, rain stops, be shown sunbeam.
there’s a girl within falling in love, a woman without daydreaming of love
be real, woman! the girl is as true as your love itself
never doubt your heart; trust your life
Wrap me, Beloved
With a blanket that calms down
And colours my heart.
today was a painful day, my emotion was so drained and i need a long battery charge before starting a new week — a thick blanket would be good
some days pull me too deep then suddenly kick me high abruptly or the other way round; i am now back to my grip ‘coz life is just like that
alhamdulillah
💕
Seems that the “Kiai Semar” piggy bank in my instastory has drawn hidden attention. My friend sent me a picture of ancient piggy bank saying “Are you still saving in celengan, don’t you have a bank account? Why so traditional?”
Arrgh! Should I tell people I save in the bank? It is something common to save in the bank because I need debit card to do all my financial thingy every now and then. How can I shop without debit card? And they think my debit card will just get impregnated with money without me feeding it? I am saving in the bank, my dear.
When said by a close friend in a normal situation, it feels ok. When said by a distant friend who has a rather unpleasant history, it feels rather ouch!
Anyway celengan (Javanese) is apiggy bank, a traditional container to save money.
What does celengan literally mean? Celengan is a Javanese word formed by celeng and -an. Celeng means boar or wild boar, –an is a suffix to form a word to be a Noun. Celeng itself is a Noun, celengan is a Noun to change the word celeng into another Noun with slightly different meaning. While celeng is wild boar, celengan means toy wild boar or a container in a wild boar form.
Why wild boar or celeng? As we know boar or wild boar is a family of pig. Maybe because pig is a symbol of luck, prosperity, wealth so people hope that by saving in a container formed like a wild boar they can be lucky and wealthy. I don’t think it is an original Javanese culture as Javanese didn’t originally raise it in the neighborhood. They got wild boar by hunting — remember the word “wild”. This might come from a culture where pig was domesticated and so became close to human beings’ daily activities.
By the time piggy bank is not in a form of pig or wild boar anymore. It can be in a form of chicken, frog, jar, etc including the Kiai Semar (a wayang character) that I bought in Kasongan, Yogyakarta. And the material can be from plastic, wood; while the original is terracotta.
Why am I ranting so long?
Sometimes liking it or not, I feel one word from one person can ruin my day in silence. It doesn’t matter, life is just like that. Why making that person so important that I get hurt by just random words from one? Forget it.
Thanks, celengan for making me even more relaxed after digging in the Japanese cuisine.
Weekend is here.
Please bless me with good time. Amen.
Have a good weekend!
ancient terracotta piggy bank for me
i wish to have a big one filled with gold — and some people will say “are you a gold digger?”
damn! if i am a gold digger, i won’t be here, i will have been in Japan married to the only son of a president of a company 😎
Relax, Beloved,
There's a place for victory
Other than fighting.
finding that Sunday evening i will be away, i changed my Japanese food craving to today, tomorrow will be my packing day for next two trips, reading and chasing wind
Friday’s message: just relaxxx and eat crabbb!
Eden, Beloved
Exists next to the kitchen
Where she has some fun.
A tropical garden is a kind of lush garden I want to see when washing the dishes. I am looking forward to it with the help from our tropical gardener– we can find them easily in Indonesia.
But it will be done after the Japanese garden. Right now the spot is still packed with construction material and debris. There shall be deep cleaning to ensure no left over of material in the soil and fertile soil to be added.
While the Japanese garden is restricted to inner circle, this tropical garden is where all guests can take some fresh air as long as they don’t make any harm to anyone around.
Please be patient, dear self. One at a time–
💕
had to cut out the coloured part as there is some spoiled part around it
yosh! now time to complete my laundry 😍
the sketch that kept delayed
Private's, Beloved
This ordinary one's life.
Not much to expose--
I lock my Instagram account always and it forever will be locked, only those having directly met with me can become my contacts. Does it sound arrogant? No, it is a protection — to protect myself from unfair judgement from those contacts knowing me from my words or my pictures in my curated frames; and to protect my contacts from misjudging me simply based on my curated frames– they will be able to judge me more fairly by talking to me or meeting with me first before becoming my contacts in Instagram.
My contacts are those family members and friends; not even colleagues as we believe our professional judgement might be clouded with some personal bias that is not even related to work.
I am so so sorry for being so picky (a bit irritating I know I am) but I am still willing to reply anyone’s messages.
💕
What about WordPress?
It is where I am ranting and there are only 20-40 people visiting me daily and my postings are all extracted ideas in poetry that by nature can be interpreted by anyone. So anyone is welcome to visit my WordPress even without leaving a trace.
💕
Release, Beloved
What's wished. Let it fly to find
Its way to go home.
this fragile dandelion is my favourite plant, it reminds me to release wishes to their way home, where they materialise their best potentials
💕
(picture from Pinterest)
Today I am browsing around with my Blue and feeling good!
Back on track. Let’s do it all day!
Thank you for all the active senses❣️
….many more to share in silence
rike jokanan 
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