Flower arrangement
Scrutinized by pairs of eyes--
Layers of beauty.
any flower will do for me but no plastic flowers, please
Flower Arrangement
Tag: journey
Egg
Fresh eggs nicely boiled
Roll on a table for two.
One faster grabber--
boiled, hard, favourite 💕
never keep eggs in the fridge anymore; fresh from the basket tastes better 🍀🐣
Green Clovers
A bush of clovers
Wave by the wind of autumn
Along stoney roads.
Kameyama’s clovers
Nara’s clover
Walking A Route
A short route to walk
When the sun's down, the moon's up.
The dark that protects--
my normal weekly brisk walk route keeps rewilding 👍🏽
crescent moon that doesn’t look crescent 😆
white spider lily along the way
it’s erected completely, across the reservoir
First Breeze
First breeze each morning
Caresses her face. So cool.
Ensuring good days--
it’s a result of life-long learning to easily thank you
when someone’s young (or childish), life might feel full of many testing & struggling; yet with honest & robust life management, life becomes a box with lessons learnt about how to deal with discolouration of true personality, how to put good effort to deliver messages, how to accept unexpected results with “oh not that”, how to be clearer & clearer about what life is & about what life should be wisely treated
thank you, Beloved for the life — cool & bright like morning breeze coming in when I open the window
🌻🍀💕
You Go, You May
If they walk away,
Just walk away.
It means no means today.
As love is here
No matter what,
Footsteps won't give no way.
I'm content.
I'm happy.
After the last drip of what's in store is gray,
Whether it's coffee
Or Japan's May.
why doubtful?
leaving what’s not wanted in a mug after the coffee drip is done is what it should be ☺️
why looking back, dear coffee drinker
the air is welcoming you
go like a galloping horse
go like a slithering snake
go like the last drop of coffee in a mug
you’ve met the way
with or without your coffee machine, my heart is blooming everyday 🥰
🌻
Weekend Bright
Weekend bright yellow
Slows down horses in the barn.
Wheat stalks are flying.
happy fun weekend, WordPress!
my ironing board surfing & long-sit reading 😍
In The Deep
In the deep
I meet with a dragon.
She tells me her stories
And I'm offended.
"That's my story, not yours.
Are you teasing me?"
The dragon smiles, jerks her tail and softly slaps my cheek with it.
"It's a mirror in the deep
Telling you it's yours. And it is. Yet it's also mine."
I push my body up, breathe my lungs out in the air.
The dragon is still in the deep
Smiling with her golden heart.
today a friend of mine asked me at dinner “why do you post stories that poke me?”
“what do you mean by ‘poke me’? I’m mostly just saying.”
“saying after knowing something? or saying just saying?” she complained again, disbelieving in my statement
“I’m just saying what is pushed by something within I can’t stop. I just have to say it at lunch break or after work!” there’s no intention to tease you or anyone in the Instagram who have access to my locked account”
she didn’t say anything, she must have trusted me
sometimes the vibe is too strong splashing on me and I simply have to say something to the air because that’s the only way to tell the truth even to those not reading my postings (unfortunately some vibe truly comes to me just like that)
some soul hears each other clearly, or vaguely but accidentally correctly 😁
sorry but not sorry, dear friend….
I don’t know you are touched, I hope you learn some lessons.
💕
Wind That Blows
Beloved, listen
To the wind that blows. It strokes
Hair spreading fragrance.
life gives me so much, one of them is my hair that bears some fragrance then spreads it while waving by the wind
💕
Coloured
Here is a canvas
To draw fruit, bread and chicken
In vibrant colours.
As I’m fond of cooking my own food when not in business trip, I invest in some good cookware and some of them are Le Creuset, a reknown name of colorful, porcelain-enamelled cast iron cookware, particularly its iconic Dutch ovens. It’s known for superior heat retention, durability, and handcrafted quality, though they also make stoneware, stainless steel, and other kitchen items.
My collection consists of many random colours: red, pink, white, blue, purple, orange, etc. this time I want sets of same colours: green and yellow!
Cooking becomes full of colours not only from the ingredients but also from the cookware, making cooking fun and vibrant like painting in a kitchen kabinets. 😁
I’m just thinking of how to bring them to Korine Jati in Indonesia to ensure all items are intact upon arrival. Can’t wait, can’t wait!
this is the immediate colour to get for Korine Jati
yellow, too!
Artisan Bakes
The dough is rested,
Then one last rest before baked.
Beauteous fragrance served--
done in less than 10 minutes, chocolate is always a favourite
the other is croissant
never miss this tiny bakery when browsing around Sultan Mosque
Wardah Books is right in front of konditori
a cozy corner on the 2nd floor of Wardah Books occupying a small shop lot of more than 100 years of age
Ratianah Kebaya, a spot to chat about shared culture
Sultan Mosque, it’s either the 1st or last drop when browsing around that area
This is where I sit quietly doing nothing, just thinking about thinking & what I’ve been doing right or wrong based on the limit I understand
See you again next week.
Moss
Moss, dear Beloved
Spreads on the soil to the wall
Where air is dampened.
my colleagues and I talked about our favourite plant: moss
I’ve seen moss as fascinated tiny growth since I was very young. I loved scraping moss on the stone, walls, trees and other possible surfaces to later observe the minuscule size of the leaves
other than the structure itself, its colour is fascinating; the dark green when it’s fresh, the light green when it looses moisture, the brown when it’s dried out
one of the gardens in my Korine Jati will be covered with moss, it’s gonna be the small garden in front of my bedroom — a humble small patch that freshens my days, a place for me where a spot is prepared to meditate and pray, a place where thought is thinking about itself, a corner where secret is whispered before silenced
dear, moss
be my best friend who is keeping my deepest hope, love, luck & faith to the
Beloved
Long or Short
Long or short, my love
A weekend fulfilled with joy
Is a green meadow.
it is maybe one of clearest days in my life in which I can see what it means to be accepting
I’m never angry because of any type of rejection; I’m always upset when it’s about unclear behaviour in human being’s life
yet today with a long ride on the road to Masjid Sultan I found that there’s part of life in which a group of people use unclarity to protect themselves but claiming they are the most honest guys on earth
there is time, a cycle of it where everything starts then ends
let’s watch people cook, let’s watch people pretend….
and when my observation is correct, I’ll tell my best friends “I told you!”
happy weekend, WordPress
Mega Mendung (batik)
Mega Mendung,
Life is loaded with quizzes
Yet it's also beautifully adorned with gifts and bliss
Only if
You are willing to walk around
The circle
And see.
Meet me at the curve where
Life twists
Your plot.
Only if
You believe.
these batik sheets were sent to me when I was on holiday in Yogyakarta – batik Mega Mendung
Mega Mendung is a batik pattern originated from a town named Cirebon.
…. speechless to tell more as it reminds me of how life twists the plot and make words vanish one by one to the air. Only beauty in silence….
I’ll talk about batik mega mendung more thoroughly next round when my mega mendung dress is done.
this is pretty, for next round 😘
Love (ranting)
If I am to mention what’s my super power, it’s to love & to accept my life as it is.
What is love?
I used to think love was only that among family members. Then I grew it as a flower in a garden of family and friends. Then it grew to romance. Now it’s as wide as humanity & life. What a growth I’ve deliberately realised when I’m grown up.
Today love itself has taught me how it is a fuel to accept what life is and at the same time to keep the journey on. Love is never that that discourages human being to hope for the best. Love is never that that deflates the hope to keep believing that humanity prevails.
Sometimes love feels so tiny that it can only give me a small hole to see a faraway land with a beautiful meadow. It feels so depressed sometimes that it can only make me breathe the thin air to feel the freshness of breeze in the mountain.
Yet most of the time love is huge embracing this heart to smile and to dance and to prance above the path of life. It highlights what’s bright in a dull moment. It balances what’s tailing, spinning, diving and loopy like a kite flying unsteadily. It makes these eyes see what it is, no drama, no excessive handling– just being a stable self, loving, living.
Love is an action to load daily activities with meaning and purpose, how trivial the action is. Love is a willingness to share with others in silence or in crowd with little to no attention seeking. All not easy, but doable–
I can only write about love because that’s the only thing I can talk about.
Work is something I can only share with my colleagues. Charity is something I can only share with those rightful to receive. Love is for all around me.
Celebrate love! It’s as spacious as a weekend.
☘️❣️
a petal of rose like cherry’s, sways in autumn to mark surrender
☺️
If…, It’s You
If
You disappear from the world,
There will be only me.
What would I do?
I'll create
You.
I did create
You with so much love
For myself as if it's from
You.
If I have to lose anything, I'll let it be
You. Not because I don't have enough love for you.
It's simply because I can always create
You.
this epilogue is powerful
Garden in This Heart
I'm water whose splash
Cleans wounds in my own heart.
I'm fire whose spark
Burns wounds to immediately heal.
I'm wind whose blow
Dries wounds to end the pain.
Dear, Beloved.
Let me meet a true heart who as well has become water, fire, and wind to one's own self.
Dear, Beloved.
Let us walk and sprint together in all trails and at the finish line meeting
You.
Dear, Beloved.
This heart is a garden where nature starts a cycle to end, ready to welcome the next cycle.
This year.
leafy ring 💎
Tongue Tied
Tongue tied, Beloved
Seeing how carefree you are
Dancing with the tide--
life is about riding the tides. when it’s high, soar. when it’s low, dive. this soul is free, loving from distance or nearby– no difference but loving from distance makes the vibe thicker with longing, from nearby lighter with laughter
love is as beautiful as everyday’s sunray
never hurry! love is the way itself, not a destination
2026, you’re chosen. congratulations 💎
This Heart
This heart is the earth
Who will bury stories, gossips, complaints, grievances to the depth
The very deep.
Layers of soil will dry,
Solidify,
Carbonize,
Fossilize
In peace.
Then miners come
To liquify what's solidified.
Diamond, sapphire, ruby, quartz....
Name more.
They're dug up
To the surface
Beautiful and shiny
Like love, hope and protection.
Yet some are glaring
Like pride, arrogance and domination.
Dear,
Heart.
Slip in my deepest self
And never open the doors.
It hurts to be mined.
Love is always precious like diamonds that adorn little life. Yet I’m resting after the diamonds are scattering on the floor, clinking around, rolling, some unfound….
The are some pieces left. The last to be guarded please the last….
And It’s Holiday
Holy, Beloved
The days through which I walk through
Life and her stories.
This Heart
This heart, Beloved
Is the star constellations
Glow when she's so dark.
This heart, Beloved
Glows constantly in the dark
With hope, love and fear.
The Star
The star, Beloved
Falls-- falls after collision
To ocean of tears.
I love you, Ibu. No one loves me like you do. I know you’re happy in the other side.
Send my warm regards to Bapak whose love and protection is beyond any man I’ve ever met so far.
Terima kasih, Bapak & Ibu.
You’re always in my heart esp now.
😘☺️❣️
Hidden Gem
Hidden gem, my love
Glows in this heart telling tales
About hidden love
That might never find her nest.
The voiceless gets more silent.
Today my friend brought me around Jogja. The most interesting part was of course Pasar Beringharjo (Beringharjo Market) in which whatever souvenirs from Jogja are completely displayed. The most I love about this market is “ibu-ibu gendhong”, the women who sell their service to carry the people’s (both traders and shoppers) stuff from one point to another. My friend works in the NGO that advocate them to get better access to better rights as informal workers. The women (we call them buruh gendhong: female porters) know my friend very well so I always get the chance to say hi to them every time I visit some markets in Jogja & be given directions which best traders I can go to get the best products.
Today they showed me a hidden gem, a small corner where old-aged batik sheets and tradion Javanese kebaya are traded. What a blessed day today was!
How should I have felt except thankful? It was a good bargain– just with less than SGD50 I got a package of pretty apparels that I will wear to attend Christmas party in my cousin’s home.
kebaya, old batik sheet & an obi belt of Sido Asih batik
Thank you!
My cold heart got warm with the shopping spree and meeting the female porters who are the true representative of humble life itself.
God bless you, Ibu-Ibu & Mbah-Mbah Buruh Gendong. 💕
Arranged
Beautiful, my love
The arranged colours and scents--
The heart shines brightly.
pretty like me 😁
Eyes to Eyes
Eyes to eyes, my Love
Where realm of now and here be
Punishing the past.
When I talk with someone, I’ll look into one’s eyes. It’s a sign that I respect my interlocutor, embracing one’s presence mindfully here and now. In return I really hope that the person does the same to me.
Yet who am I to want someone to do it wholeheartedly.
Let days be days. Lessons flow like rivers within me, the heaven that I’ve built to reach the real heaven ahead.
Wish you all a blessed weekend.
💙
Life Is Poetry
Life is poetry
Singing songs to a quiet heart
To be pretty noise.
me trying on the “Booty on mega mendung” batik
Faithful
Show me, Beloved
That it's real and right and true.
Says a shy lover.
The Quran is always a good advisor to me. It never lets me down.
When I’m so doubtful of self worth, it always sends me encouragement to be always faithful to what’s shown to me, without others’ validation or justification. Trust me an ordinary human being in whatever age period will still question herself when a strong blow of question “who do you think you are? know your worth” comes to her especially from those who are supposed to at least “shut the mouth”. 😁❣️
What a day!
This verse that randomly opened just now is QS Assajdah #24. For those reading this as outside world this verse is about leaders in a group; yet to me as the Quran can always be about what’s within, this is about leader within me which is the Heart.
The heart will only lives and be alive only when the whole body agrees to be patient and trust what’s shown through the existing senses. Be patient, dear self. Trust the process and the symbols and signs shown to you.
I will just walk to where love and compassion is leading me. Be it real. Be it true. Be it right.
Amen.
💙
Enlightened (ranting)
Pages of a book
Dog-eared, yellowed
And wrinkle
Of fingers stroking--
I’m not a religious person yet I love checking holy books, books about local faith around the world and writings about philosophy. To me wisdom scatters everywhere; it might not be the best sources of wisdom but reading them has opened my horizon of thinking and I’ve become an open-minded and free thinker to some extent.
There is one more thing about checking those books is getting personal advice that I can’t get from even the closest people around me– not because I don’t trust their love to me but I don’t trust their level of bias in analysing my situation. They are not open enough to accept me who is very open in thinking yet very morally guarding to my own self (two paradoxes my closest people still can’t understand up to now). That’s why I “consult” the Quran, the holy book aside from Bible that I’ve been familiar with since I was young (my father was a Christian).
Today I felt the need of consulting the Quran; I prayed, recited Alfatihah the opening suuraah of the Quran, greeted those I respect in life, took a short silence and randomly opened the book.
Here is the answer from the Quran.
QS Annuur #38
That Allah may reward them [according to] the best of what they did and increase them from His bounty. And Allah gives provision to whom He wills without account.
My heart stopped doubting. Is it because of the Quran? Is it because of to whom I prayed? Is it because of my trust? Maybe one of them. Maybe all of them. And I don’t want other possibilities because I won’t let myself doubt what’s been confirmed.
Thank you, dear Quran for being my closest friend, a book that opens all the doors of light. I might not be religious but you’re always the #1 consultant I’ve turned to for the past 33 years and probably will be for the rest of my life.
Light, light, my heart becomes so light.
Thank you❣️
Mandarin Duck
Mandarin ducks perch
On a rocky river bank
Enjoying the sun.
a painting of a raft of Mandarin ducks would be a beautiful spot in a house
their colours are fascinating
Cracked (ranting)
Don’t crack under pressure. Maybe only “that watch” can do that; while most including human beings definitely crack under certain pressure like ceramics that can even break simply because of some delicate qualities that should crack to let some component of life lessons enter the inner realm of the pressurised persona.
I don’t mind cracking under certain pressure as long as life lessons can smoothly diffuse themselves into the liquid vortex within. Then as gold in kintsugi, they mend what’s cracked leaving golden map showing myself where to find a way of acceptance & letting go.
If I don’t crack, I will always look perfect with no guilt splashed, no criticism slashing, no confrontation exercising, no discussion & argument heated then calming, no accountability assessed. Looking perfect as a being accumulate some layers of avoidance to make mistakes, emotional exhaustion, failure of focused self reflection, forced compatibility even within self, self centernedness. Oh no! I prefer being an imperfect persona in front of many rather than being a looking perfect with so much burden within.
Being imperfect doesn’t mean I’m bad. It just shows me that I’m a human being and it’s fine to look ugly sometimes. As a human being I want to be vulnerable so I can be as playful as possible genuinely; so I can speak my truth with ease in a sweet way; so I can love other human being with no shame; so I can be as imperfect as nature wishes me to be outside my work (hallooow at work I need to be perfectly doing what I’m assigned for sure)!
If only I can directly tell some of human beings I know how perfect you’ve been looking and you need to stop being perfect, I’ll tell you wholeheartedly while assuring that you are free to be you the condition that you agree to heal together with no pretense and that you agree to be true to life.
Dear humans, you’re a ceramics not that watch that won’t crack under pressure. You deserve to be kintsugi decorated with golden map showing love where to flow.
Yes, I love to get answered as an answer is like lacquer reassembling cracked ceramics and yes I give myself answer because I deserve vulnerability, my own vulnerability; truth, my own truth; honesty, my own honesty– with love and respect.
Yes and I’ll let my heart crack again with better understanding and acceptance why it should crack then let life apply kintsugi on me.
Life is just like that…. 💙☺️🌻
this is me, imperfect & vulnerable as I’m kintsugi
☺️
kintsugi in a nutshell
rike jokanan 
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