A Star Not

You are not a star.
Never.
A star brightly rises.
A star magnificently sets.
You might be upset
As a star is what is adored
By many.
Donโ€™t be a star,
It is born,
It dies.
A seen star is thousands years of its historyโ€”
Illusion.

You are the earth.
Always.
Who lets the sun rise
And lets the sun set
Sincerely.
The earth is loved
By many.
When I see the earth
I see a present moment
Of everything about it.
I am grounded to earth.
It is where I live, love and laugh

Sincerely.

You are
A star not.

โ€”โ€”

a star is a dream; the earth is where I live, love and laugh sincerely

Note: picture is from Pinterest; I wanted a Java island on the earth with stars above yet could not find any ๐Ÿ™‚

May All Beings Be Happy

Once
I knew not
Or cared not
That all struggled
Until
I sat still
To feel the whole cosmos
Within me.
Now
I know
And know
That all inevitably suffer
By choice though.
And so
I chant
Wishingโ€ฆ
May all beings be happy, free from suffering.

And to you
Across the ocean.
With red roses,
May you be happy, free from suffering.

โ€”โ€”

May all beings be happy ๐Ÿ’•

free from suffering

โ€ฆ. and also to you across the ocean โ™ฅ๏ธ

Fully Paid

Journey becomes light
When promise is fully paid.
The breeze flows sweetly.

โ€”โ€”

beautifully ready for melukat this morning to clean and clarify my life intension and for my dearest nephew โ™ฅ๏ธ now his wish for melukat is fully paid โ€” live happily in the other side, my dear ๐Ÿ’• and I have a good feeling that my life is on the right path with my heart losing no love

melukat in Tirtha Empul when it was still quiet this morning โ€” no, I donโ€™t like crowd ๐Ÿ™๐Ÿผ donโ€™t bring me to noisy parties!

The Love & The Logic

This love is as strong as the glue
A snail can spit on an aloe vera
To cling even in a hottest day.
Your logic is as cold as the air
A morning can loosen natureโ€™s desire
In a split second love will go away.

This love is unrequited,
That logic always wins.
Our bond is thinly formatted
As hair splitting to twins.

It is just a dream,
Though dream of a meadow.
It is truly a wish,
Yet wish of a shadow.

Love will open a bundle of joy.
Logic will open a bundle of satisfaction.

They are happy differently.

Understoodโ€”

โ€”โ€”

reminding me of how strong love can bond a heart to a dream that wonโ€™t come true โ™ฅ๏ธ

dear heart, releaseโ€ฆ. the logic will never let you win ๐Ÿ™๐Ÿผ

Friends

My friends are plants grown in a garden called
My heart.

Grow as you wish.
As you are.
There are only two rules here:
Be you responsibly
And root strongly.
Otherwise, youโ€™ll
Get weak
Then withered.
And
Dry
Then....

โ€”โ€”

I wrote a poem in Bahasa Indonesia in my iPhone about FRIENDS while enjoying todayโ€™s lunch: And just now when opening Twitter, I found a thread about 12 levels of friends described in Arabic.

My day is summed up!

All is connected.

๐Ÿ’•

Half and Half


Do you know,
Belovedโ€ฆ?
In the middle of a water
Tossing wildly a Land
Stretching like a tail,
Tinted with merry tiny blossoms
Willing to smile
In May summed up are they.
Bearing light fragrance
Infusing air elegantly
For you, only for youโ€”


Do you also know,
Belovedโ€ฆ?
I lullaby some seeds
That wake up lazily,
Stretch to the sky
Then sprinkle perfumes
With thousands of flowers
In the 9th month
Being warm and fuzzy
In the other half
For you, only for youโ€”

For you
Whether to take
Or to give up.
There is no heaviness in a no.
There is no lightness in a yes.
There is pain in silence.
Yet life is so rich,
There is always cure
For any wound.
Let poems sing heart songs
For you, only for you.

โ€”โ€”

Angel without Wings

How do you call you
Loving expecting no pay?
Only the motherโ€”

โ€”โ€”

today i called her after she said that she could not sleep remembering Vito, the grandson who just passed away

this lady is impressively patient and loving her grandchildren; losing him has never been easy

she tried to hide her cry from me but her voice could not lie

if i can tell anyone about someone to never forget, it must be about mother

love her, donโ€™t disappoint her ever again as there might have been a lot of troubles from us when we were younger

i love you, Ibu

Shape of Heart

Sprinkles of petalS
Sway from the sky gracefully
Calling name of yours.

โ€”โ€”

genji pie that shapes like heart or rose petal or whatever beautifully seen by eyes

genji pie, aside from the shape the taste is also good to me

genji pie has inspired me to love

About genji pie

Pilgrimage

This lifeโ€™s pilgrimage
Spiralling in to the core
Of old house within.

โ€”โ€”

a mosque in Tokyo โ€” Tokyo Jamii (Camii)

entrance โ€” assalamualaikum, Tokyo Camii

mosque area – 2nd floor

i still know how to do sholat tahiyatul masjid (praying to respect mosque), recite QS Arrahman that is full of gratitudes and praises so i did it

the feel was exactly like when i pray in the temples and shrines

a feeling of home ๐Ÿ’•

then a beautiful sister helped me with photo taking โ€” she made me much taller, slimmer yet less me ๐Ÿ˜ thank you ๐Ÿ’•

time to fly home โ€” thank you, Tokyo ๐Ÿ’•

you make me love myself more and more, with all the wounds and scars

My Heart Is

They have said 
I am lost.

What I seeโ€ฆ
I am in a forest away
From comfort of thought.
I am not in a castle
In which mind is blunted.
My heart finds home
In which 25 prophets
And 1000 saints
Have found the paths.

It is a way
That all Prophets and Saints bless.

I am home
With the flow
That brings petals
To where fragrance blends
With clarity of fluids,
Various fluids
Gliding to a vast ocean
Of love.

โ€”โ€”

i donโ€™t care anymore what i am called by them โ€” Muslim? Alhamdulillah, Sufi? Subhanallah, Buddhist? Masya Allah

what i am sure of is that my sutra is sutra of love with which all prophets and saints have travelled, whatever religions they have been associated with

thank you

๐Ÿ’•

To Those I Love

When somebody loved me
Everything was beautiful
Every hour spent together
Lives within my heart

And when she was sad
I was there to dry her tears
And when was happy so was I
When she loved me

Through the summer and the fall
We had each other that was all
Just she and I together
Like it was meant to be

And when she was lonely
I was there to comfort her
And I knew that she loved me

So the years went by
I stayed the same
But she began to drift away
I was left alone
Still I waited for the day
When she'd say I will always love you

Lonely and forgotten
Never thought she'd look my way
And she smiled at me and held me
Just like she use to do
Like she loved me
When she loved me

When somebody loved me
Everything was beautiful
Every hour spent together
Lives within my heart
When she loved me

I thank you, God for giving me courage to express my love and affection to those I love. I will not regret.

๐Ÿ’•

Fragrant Respect and Sweet Love for You

I love you
And I respect you
Fragrantly.

Iโ€™ve missed you
More and more
Since I didnโ€™t open windows
Anymore.

This heart though is open
Like pores of petals
Evaporating fragrance
In a warm September.

Be happy, Beloved
As you deserve to.
Whereas this scent
Will keep leaping stone to stone.

Your face pops out
In this head every second
Like brilliant dew drops
In a shy May.

I respect you
And I love you
Sweetly.

โ€”โ€”

enough sweet and fragrant for snacking for 5 days in Tokyo

Hatred Was Love

Hatred, Beloved
Never a choice; it is loveโ€”
Once got hurt then lost.

(haiku at lunch break)

โ€”โ€”

osho, the king in shogi (Japanese chess)

About shogi the Japanese chess

Land

A pair of strong wings
Bring me to a land of thoughts
Where hope shines the light.

โ€”โ€”

landed home after burying hope to grow with flowers and spreading love with billowing incense smoke

Lovely Friendship

The spell of friendship
Is not F R I E N D S H I P.
To spell friendship
Is to put some magical words
To a bond
So it lasts forever
In love.

My friends put a spell on me.
I put a spell on them.
We put a spell on each other
To stay together
Gleaming like stars
In a cluster
Or in different ones blinking to each other.

How beautiful friendship is
When bonded with genuine drops
Of souls
And
Adorned with true colours
Of hearts.

How real friendship is
When soul and heart
Are sprinkled on to
A life that hopes
And loves.

โ€”โ€”

this book of friendship โ€” no where to find in souvenir shop but found in the heart of friends

fun and true and real and genuine ๐Ÿ’• friendship with my beloved nephews

On A Rope

A rope might help
To travel to the other side,
Yet it might be not.
Being in the other side
Is not always wise
As a wise is
That that means
Decision for the right.
Right time
Right place
Right person
That might be
Not right:
Not always right amount
Not always right distance
Not always right calculation.
This rope is right
Only when it is about
Knowing that pulling or releasing
Are both hurting
Right where and when it is decided to.

this?

this one is wiser for now ๐Ÿ’•

might not be the right one, yet being relaxed and easy is sometimes the right one for now โ€” i just donโ€™t want to think too much; wisdom is not always hard ๐Ÿ’•

Memory of Fun

Vito and Ocka in fun flash rehearsal in the costume storage room ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜˜

๐Ÿ’•

his life was about fun and memory about him should be about fun, too

Never-ending Prayer

In a prayer
Millions of pearls
Are dangling
In a line of blessings
Letting go off
What is called
Attachment,
Co-dependency,
And ignorance.

When darkness traps
What is called hope,
It is love
That keeps it sparked
And sparkling
Before it is free,
Traveling light
On a beautiful orbit.

โ€”โ€”

my boy, I commit to celebrate your life and dreams instead โ€” be always in our heart; you are so much loved, you are always remembered ๐Ÿ’•

alfatihaah ๐Ÿ’•

Selfish To Selfless

Time flies
Space shrinks
Moment signifies
Does it even matter?

You farewelled
Sweetly to all,
Yet no one knew
Until you departed.

This selfish self
Has learnt selflessness
That it is about forgiving regrets
And escorting you to the grand gate.

We weeped heavy tears,
Youโ€™ve left long love trails.
We thought we loved you,
Youโ€™ve ignored our selfish wails.

You smiled at the long line
That witnessed your selfless joy.
We smiled to you, thanking life
For giving privilege of having that boy.

Thank you
For magically turning us
From egoistical arrogance
To considerate beings.

Thank you,
My dear boy.

โ€”โ€”

Gathering after his funeral, most of us shared about our experiences with him in his life time. Most of stories were his witty strength, social awareness and artistic talents. Many were also about how much he ate โ€” he was not a picky eater.

Yet some kept saying โ€œI canโ€™t stop cryingโ€, โ€œI was one of those giving him last sacred bathโ€, โ€œI trembled one night before he passed awayโ€, โ€œWhy did you leave me?โ€, โ€œI am so lonely without him aroundโ€, blahblahblah of all expressions showing how people experience you. Great self you are!

Yet does it matter? We mostly are all regretting what we didnโ€™t do what we should have done with and to you. We mostly have difficult time to forgive ourselves for not doing so with and to you.

It is about you โ€” all the administration and ceremonies. Yet at the end it is about forgiving ourselves from what we have regretted and about accepting that you are not physically around anymore.

You? Vito, you pass this cycle and enjoy the happiness beyond our joy!

My tears will dry; yet my love will keep flowing to you.

๐Ÿ’•

Salaam.

weโ€™ll continue striving for what youโ€™ve always dreamt of โ€” loving family and wise fun personality!

people said it is the longest line of funeral procession for a young man of an ordinary family โ€” everyone said it is because of your true and selfless self

Pink Rose

As pink
As rose
My heart
Chants you
Forever
As love
That throbs
Through blood
And tears
And breath
And words
In heart
And body
And mind
And spirit
And soul

you might not like pink rose but this is the most beautiful petals with which i can sprinkle with the least tears for your no-turn-back journey ๐Ÿ’•

our last Bali tour with Ocka was our most testing trip โ€” the rain and storm and damn how would you stop driving every three hours and said โ€œMbak, i am hungry i can die drivingโ€ ๐Ÿ˜

our love is about laughter and wit โ™ฅ๏ธ

my broken heart in romance has turned to a minuscule particle compared to my broken heart of losing my beloved nephew

Run Free, My Boy!

My tears will dry
But my love will keep flowing

Please forgive me. Please forgive me. Please forgive me.

๐Ÿ’•

you were young yet always the one giving me wise words to keep being my own self โ€” you were right โ€œyou are alone but never lonely, look at your poems, all struck me with fire to stay strong!โ€

you were poorer than me yet always the one telling me to keep positive yet humble

you were as fun as my soul wonโ€™t be yet you are a soul as wise as my wisdom canโ€™t be

what about our next trips that must be cancelled? you just walk and leave me a beautiful gaping hole in my heart

we love you with or without words, we lose you with or without tears

I LOVE YOU AND WEโ€™LL MEET AGAIN IN A BETTER PLACE AND TIME

Be Happy, Beloved

I wonโ€™t, Beloved
Take you from what completes you.
Your here now is that, not this.
This garden with lemongrass
Is my here and now I love.

โ€”โ€”

Ibu sent me this picture that she took by herself after forever saying โ€œI canโ€™t take good pictures like you, donโ€™t ask me anyโ€ โ€” 3 slices of some cake I bought online (sold through Twitter) and delivered directly to her โ™ฅ๏ธ

she said โ€œthank you for the โ€˜spikoekโ€™, it is amazingly yummyโ€

my motherโ€™s love is so huge that i donโ€™t realise like seeing a sheet of paper from 1 millimeter away ๐Ÿ’•

i am enough with a few humble friends that truly understand me so i wonโ€™t anymore beg friendship from that not even wanting to know who i am ๐Ÿ˜

Bloom

This heart blooms and blooms
Leaving quiet budding season,
Emerging from mud.

โ€”โ€”

One of my friends complained why all my poems are about love, like I am either falling in love or broken hearted day by day.

After some time of chat and juice against wine glasses that friend answered oneโ€™s own question.

โ€œYa! Life is about loving: smoothly or broken-heartedly. Now I know what you mean. I thought all were about romance! Ahhh!โ€

I tried a sip of wine from that friendโ€™s glass.

โ€œYouโ€™ll get drunk more at home and write more love poems!โ€ Said that friend laughing.

โ€œYes, I wonโ€™t give up this love whatever interpretation is thrown about me to me. I am thankful enough to have very few true friends who understand.โ€

Salaam.

true love is too tasteless for those weighing it with money; yet too complex for those weighing it with faith โ€” for those not knowing the true secrets behind words, love is just a marriage between distrust and fear hidden in sparkling plastic ๐Ÿ™ƒ i know love is still beautiful whether it is well understood or misunderstood ๐Ÿ’•

High

Iโ€™m high
Of thinking of
You that hums and chants
Nature of love
Spraying peace
Around my orbit.

Iโ€™m high
Of rotating on my own self,
And revolving around
You.

โ€”โ€”

not so high a stack but it took three hours to do so โ€” yes, iโ€™m slow Iron Woman ๐Ÿ˜

You to Me

In a bottle of perfume
You are the heart note.
In a cup of coffee
You are the acidity.
In a full course meal
You are the entree.
In a life of a human
You are the love.

โ€”โ€”

stronger with YOU

Love Is Not Leaving

Love is not leaving.
Kernel then seedling then tree;
Stays yet multipliesโ€”

โ€”โ€”

After some journey and some work finally dinner was here now and it was an unforgettable one.

This long dragged day is nothing compared to todayโ€™s dinner. A dinner accompanied by a poem.

Yes my life is full of flower.

Thanks for the blessings!

Salaam.

โ™ฅ๏ธ

sure it is about flowers โ€” thanks much! i feel a tiny love bouncing and getting bigger and bigger in my heart when eating

they put it under my green tea; what a sweet creativity this restaurant demonstrates โ€” will never forget this!

A Head In A Table

This head, Beloved
Is full of colours
That suck all memories
To an abandoned landfill
Where poems dance in joy
Recycling precious moments
Into glowing beads
Jingling around a neck,
Chuckling on millions of love wishes
That scatter on a table.

โ€”โ€”

yeah! this is one busiest corner of my head everyday! messy yet full of love ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ˜€

Happy Together

Walking the aisle
Two smiling earthlings canโ€™t stop waving hands
To us
Who wonder
โ€œThey were toddlers we hugged,
Now they read solemn vow?โ€
It is a happy day
When we pray, laugh and eat together
Witnessing happiness that proceeds.

โ€”โ€”

Matt, my best friendโ€™s youngest son is getting married today! Matt and Cheer, Tante Rike happy for you ๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜ send me all our pictures โ™ฅ๏ธ

cheering with groomโ€™s mama after eating ๐Ÿ˜‚ day is good with those looking forward to bright days โ™ฅ๏ธ

Love โ€˜Coz Itโ€™s Time

Thereโ€™s a crook
I canโ€™t understand.
It is when I saw
You in silence
And said in heart
โ€œI find no reason in
You for me to love but
What is this emotion?โ€
Thereโ€™s another
I can understand.
It is when I felt
A warm summer
And said in heart
โ€œThereโ€™s enough reason to love
You in silence
That forever blooms.โ€

No reason is needed to love
For love is blind.
Yet thereโ€™s reason to keep the love
For love is the only kind.

Itโ€™s time
When itโ€™s time.

โ€”โ€”

my orchids after one week left home alone

welcome! my orchids have taught me that flowers bloom when itโ€™s time; not to be seen, not to be picked, not to be admired; theyโ€™re blooming simply to bloom โ€” thereโ€™s only one reason to understand: itโ€™s time

what is her ID? unknown and still beautifully blooming

with a line of my white shirts hanging as the background, this oncidium is gonna be yellow

another stem of oncidium waiting for its timing to greet me with yellow

dendrobium peeps again โ€” thank you

dendrobium from the same cluster in the same pot that keeps greeting me with health and happiness