Beautiful, my love
The arranged colours and scents--
The heart shines brightly.

pretty like me 😁
graphs of my Universe
Beautiful, my love
The arranged colours and scents--
The heart shines brightly.

pretty like me 😁
I've asked myself all my life:
Have you ever thought what this life is for?
You're born. You die.
You struggle. You cry.
You suffer. You rant.
You're full. You sleep.
You're fulfilled. You forget.
You're numb. You're silent.
If it's really
You that this life is about,
Am I really needed?
Am I really wanted?
Yet the echoes of the quest go on.
Your answers feel like algae converting light to feed my days with
Hope that you embrace me, with
Fear that it will end when I still owe you promises.
I can't answer it clearly until today.
It becomes like a love story
In which falling in love is either inserted with broken-hearted acceptance or ended with broken hearted let-go.
That I live for
You, because of
You, in
You, through
You is a journey between a lover longing for the beloved who might care but care; who might love but hate, who might exist but not exist.
Have you ever thought what this life is for? I said yes and yes and yes to
You, and for
You.

Guidance

Amouge, Guidance – it’s about you guiding me to you

bought it when in Sydney

slided the box out of the outer cover

one of my best gift to myself – a scent that guides
A gift, Beloved
Breeze bringing a good fragrance
Keeping me with you.

I bought a box of gift for myself – perfume 💗
patchouli is one of my favourite fragrances, it is mostly harvested in Indonesia — there’s a documentary about how patchouli farmers are ‘exploited” for perfume industry
I’m cruelly aware that my liking to scent is making me part of the exploitation. What should I do?
….thinking in awareness & with compassion
The scent that is spread
Is that that I've missed so long.
It's in my own hair.

I was in Sydney and finally found this that I’d wanted so long. Once I thought I would love the Jasmine but this attracted me more strongly.
If I were a scent,
I would be herbal.
If I were a scent,
I would be flowers.
If I were a scent,
I would be sandalwood.
If I were a scent,
I would be musk.
If I were a scent,
I would be sea breeze.
If I were a scent,
I would be mountain dew.
What other scents could
I become?
Floral?
Oriental?
Woody?
Fresh?
If I were a scent,
I would be anything that's
Loved to breath in by
You.

How fragrant are you
Through the petals sweetly picked
By fragile fingers?
I love perfume especially when at home.
Some facts of how certain oils as part of perfume ingredients are harvested shake my liking to perfumery. If I buy those perfumes, am I abusing certain group of people? If I don’t buy, am I letting them unemployed?
Life is sometimes as simple as abc– Yet life is sometimes as complex as ancient codes to decipher.
Time to concoct my own perfume from responsibly-sourced oils?
Here is the long wait!
Here is the curiosity potion!
Here is the Burnt Hair!
😁

a message sent to me on Apr 24 when I was in my mother’s house, from a shipping company – could not recall what I purchased as not much shopping these days

today I picked it up when arriving home – what is it, what is it, said I curiously

ahhh!!! I purchased Elon Musk’s perfume, the Burnt Hair on Oct 14, 2022
the longest wait of a PO to be shipped in my life 😂

it is almost like burnt hair smell – maybe this is the smell of Elon Musk’s burnt hair 😂
does it worth the wait? hmmm…. for my curiosity yes, not for my olfactory system 😹
at least I have his product, not Tesla though 😎
Do you know,
Beloved…?
In the middle of a water
Tossing wildly a Land
Stretching like a tail,
Tinted with merry tiny blossoms
Willing to smile
In May summed up are they.
Bearing light fragrance
Infusing air elegantly
For you, only for you—
Do you also know,
Beloved…?
I lullaby some seeds
That wake up lazily,
Stretch to the sky
Then sprinkle perfumes
With thousands of flowers
In the 9th month
Being warm and fuzzy
In the other half
For you, only for you—
For you
Whether to take
Or to give up.
There is no heaviness in a no.
There is no lightness in a yes.
There is pain in silence.
Yet life is so rich,
There is always cure
For any wound.
Let poems sing heart songs
For you, only for you.
——

No scent is missed,
No inhaled air is empty.
The scent is a box of coloured mist
To bring in imagery.
These nostrils celebrate days
Through haling the loaded air
And propelling power through stories,
Millions of stories shared.
——

can’t leave without scent, good or bad

and its evolving fragrance, softened before dried

sadly this leaf was not so nicely scented 🙏🏼 thrown away

batik has a good scent as it is washed with lerak (soap berry)

frangipani, a flower that is popular as graveyard flower in Java island ♥️ sweet fragrance of the death

i miss the scent of the thin air by the rice field under the blue sky 💝
Like pigeon
But not flying,
It spreads fragrance
Along the road I am on everyday.
This sense is trained
To breathe scent.
I am walking
Like pigeon.
——

all these years i thought only this tree is where my favourite pigeon orchid “lives”

i thought only this cluster!

even this morning i thought only this one! i kissed these

walking to the bus stop, i saw a lot more! on that tree across the street

in the tree ahead of me!

in another tree!

and another tree!

then i started seeing the pigeon orchids in almost all of trees along my favourite road! i am so blessed!
They gild the lily,
Making them salt to the sea.
Ocean in a drop—
———————————————————-
When I was very young, I could desperately envy those who were physically beautiful, intelligently wise and, spiritually mature at the same time. How could people be blessed with such full readiness to face the complex life and completeness to address its various issues? I’m sure I wasn’t alone; many human beings were on the same boat with me.
Yet getting older has helped me not want anything but more consistently feeling comfortable to be my own self and realising that those perfect people only looked perfect because they were perceived through imperfect eyes (my young ones 😉).
Proofs and revelation then taught me acceptance to live with limitation, imperfection and physical flaws. In many ways I’ve seen blessings in me more than the perfect.
Being ordinary has saved me from getting high demands to be a gorgeous woman who should move gracefully in front of the crowd, a pious person who should perform religion disciplinedly or a wise friend who should give good advices when needed anytime. I’m blessed!
Being ordinary has driven me to live with only two goals: to enjoy being my own self and to do what’s best in life to be as much beneficial in my short life. With not much to choose, life is forced to be the integration between persistence and dedication, a commitment of body, mind and soul.
Fortunately being flawed is like an ocean. Ocean is full of beauty especially the deeper the diver is willing to explore; like Captain Nemo who found beauty in the depth of the sea that wasn’t witnessed by those who never traveled in Nautilus. However, thousands of cubics of any possible wastes are also dumped to the vast water: plastics, oil, waste water, many kinds of garbage and probably millions of memories drawn by broken hearts. A perfect beauty full with paradox!
Rumi reminds through one of his verses “You are not a drop in the ocean; you are the entire ocean in a drop”. A perfection in imperfection—
Truly an existence is perfect when with natural flaws and complete acceptance.
Nothing is more blessed than accepting one’s own self and taking care of one along the journey.
Summary of today’s conversation with my best friend 🐣
May all beings be happy 💝

Where are you, perfume?
Cask’s empty, you linger here
Yet nowhere to meet.
How long will you last? These breaths
Trace you through the moving air.
————————————————————
What you can’t see doesn’t always not exist. What you can sense can’t always be understood.
Life is as simple as breathing in and out.
Salaam… 💞

Scents of the unknown Lingers in the air. Muguet: Earthy, green, floral— You’ve turned spark to fire burning Dreams to fuel a sweet journey.
All people love fragrance; not necessarily perfume but yes I’m talking about it.
Let’s agree that fragrance is one of the best gifts in life – I mean…. I am not naturally smelling like flowers, but I love nice air coming into my nostrils and celebrating the beauty of nature through one of the human’s senses. Don’t you?
At times when we are wearing perfumes, we’ll subconsciously reminisce moments featuring individuals that we might or might not clearly remember.
Lemongrass mostly reminds me to Ayutthaya. Jasmine connects to a place in Erawan, Bangkok. Frangipani brings Ubud back to memory. Rose to one factory in Vietnam. Lemon brings me to my humble abode in Greater Jakarta. Sandalwood to my mother who loves sandalwood. Lavender to my father whose pomade was lavender-based. And so on, and so forth.
Recently there came unknown scents that reminded me to some people. I was browsing perfumes, and trying certain fragrances, particular moments and faces struck me stealthily. Goodness! Now I captured them through various fragrances! Moments, faces and nuances intertwined in the liquid. The memories might have been traced and downloaded by our brain! Unknown scents have empirically proved to represent impression caught about someone.
I’m now liking lily of the valley or muguet scent because it reminds this person to a most beloved. I don’t think that person splashed muguet when meeting with me but he suits that attar. What an overestimation it is! It’s ok, he doesn’t know 😂
Recommended: Go for a new experience in perfumery and investigate what scents connect you to what moments or which individuals. You might find a way to get rid of bitter past and/or revive good spirits to be happy.
Guess I know why I can’t relate well to some people that’s why they are connected to certain aroma that I’m not fond of. Probably…. Or just my superstition….
One person’s favourite scents might not be others’ ones.
That’s life.
Singapore – Jan. 7, 2021 / 23:06
May all beings be happy.

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