Tag: beauty

Cracked (ranting)

Learning, life, love, Poetic, This Person

Don’t crack under pressure. Maybe only “that watch” can do that; while most including human beings definitely crack under certain pressure like ceramics that can even break simply because of some delicate qualities that should crack to let some component of life lessons enter the inner realm of the pressurised persona.

I don’t mind cracking under certain pressure as long as life lessons can smoothly diffuse themselves into the liquid vortex within. Then as gold in kintsugi, they mend what’s cracked leaving golden map showing myself where to find a way of acceptance & letting go.

If I don’t crack, I will always look perfect with no guilt splashed, no criticism slashing, no confrontation exercising, no discussion & argument heated then calming, no accountability assessed. Looking perfect as a being accumulate some layers of avoidance to make mistakes, emotional exhaustion, failure of focused self reflection, forced compatibility even within self, self centernedness. Oh no! I prefer being an imperfect persona in front of many rather than being a looking perfect with so much burden within.

Being imperfect doesn’t mean I’m bad. It just shows me that I’m a human being and it’s fine to look ugly sometimes. As a human being I want to be vulnerable so I can be as playful as possible genuinely; so I can speak my truth with ease in a sweet way; so I can love other human being with no shame; so I can be as imperfect as nature wishes me to be outside my work (hallooow at work I need to be perfectly doing what I’m assigned for sure)!

If only I can directly tell some of human beings I know how perfect you’ve been looking and you need to stop being perfect, I’ll tell you wholeheartedly while assuring that you are free to be you the condition that you agree to heal together with no pretense and that you agree to be true to life.

Dear humans, you’re a ceramics not that watch that won’t crack under pressure. You deserve to be kintsugi decorated with golden map showing love where to flow.

Yes, I love to get answered as an answer is like lacquer reassembling cracked ceramics and yes I give myself answer because I deserve vulnerability, my own vulnerability; truth, my own truth; honesty, my own honesty– with love and respect.

Yes and I’ll let my heart crack again with better understanding and acceptance why it should crack then let life apply kintsugi on me.

Life is just like that…. 💙☺️🌻

this is me, imperfect & vulnerable as I’m kintsugi

☺️

kintsugi in a nutshell

Beauty Today

Learning, life, love, Poetic, This Person
What's beauty today?
Ants partying in some blooms
For sweetness of life--

no, I don’t want to focus on what I experience as bitterness too long

why should I age with heavy burdens if I can live in my second half of my life with light heart (that’s if I live 100 years)

I will see bitter day just as a bitter gourd for me to carve to be beautiful garnish or to cook in nice recipe; or better seeing it as bitter dark chocolate 😘

I just won’t let others play around as they love to tease others fr sport; no! My life is too precious to waste just for those who think life is fun when wasted with no clear design 🥰

Beauty Today

Learning, love, Poetic, This Person
Beauty today, Love
Is about about colours and shapes
Softly touch the heart.

as close as I could, I felt a tap on my broken heart telling me “life is just like that, beauty lies on the tiniest part of your own heart, not others'”

at closer glance the colours gave me some soft touch on my heart who is longing for honest heart to talk about love, life with sufficient laughter

today I worked under a tamarind tree across a construction site and found a tiny beauty, a grass flower inviting me with its enticing colours

Duality, Unity, O

Learning, life, love, Map It!, Poetic, This Person
One, two, Beloved,
Numbers to start a journey
To the zero point.

With ageing I am able to feel the surge of high energy I experienced before. With broken heart I’m so thankful that I’ve got love in this heart. With thirst I appreciate how freshness of water cures me. With the stuck in the head I become more and more familiar that flowing is the only way to love. With scarcity I can grow sense of gratitude with even just a little hope in life.

It’s you. Yes, it’s you. None other but you that makes me. None other but you that puts meaning on the word me. None other but you that moves all this life within me.

How can I be feeling so detached….

If you are the one attaching in all my senses?

If you are the one behaving with this corpse?

If you are the one drawing a circle for me to circumambulate until the two dots meet?

If you are the one?

I surrender. I retreat.

To

You.

Humble Beauty

Learning, love, Poetic

Humble beauty, love
Is found anywhere with eyes
Naked, no glasses.

i saw this

and this

and this

and this

i feel love is just everywhere incl in the wild grass and ordinary tree around me

thank you

Beauty and Majesty

Learning, Poetic, This Person, Those People

Beauty, Majesty
Both in me--
I'm predictable,
I'm throwing surprises,
Both simply reflecting
One whole me.
If you don't want one side,
You won't either get the other.

yin-yang, duality in unity, union in separation, jamal and jalal of asmaul husna, beauty and majesty, masculine and feminine, etc; you name it — it is a perfection in an imperfect human being

what do you expect from a human being but two sides of a coin, beloved?

💗

Dear Sky

Learning, love, Poetic, This Person

Looking for one face behind the cloud,
I meet a smiling sky whispering
"Land and meet one while your feet are on the ground."

Dear sky,
How paradoxical this dream is!
I've dreamt of a perfect angel
Only to find that the perfect is a real sample of imperfection.
How paradoxical this fear is!
I've been afraid of imperfect ghost
Only to see that the imperfect is a real specimen of perfection.
How paradoxical that both perfection and imperfection reside in the same home!

Step by step
I crawl down from the bed
And go to the garden
Where I guess singing birds are hopping from one swaying twig to another,
Butterflies are flying around bright coloured flowers.
What I find is silent dews gliding on sleepy leaves,
Dragonflies perching on tips of coarse leaves.
They're though real and I befriend with a verse of beauty.

Dear sky,
Always bring me naked truth with which I can be real.

Thank you.

it’s not where i want to find you; if you’re there, i will immediately leave you because it mustn’t be the real you

💕

Surrounded by You

Learning, love, Poetic

Want I

To be surrounded by
You
Where laughter is generous,
Thought is serious,
Confidence is contagious,
Maturity is glorious.

How merry
To have conversation hilarious!
Once in a while though days look rigorous,
That's when it is to my senses obvious, 
To my thought serious
That you're famous
Surrounded by
Thousands of those
Marvelous.

Sigh I.

surrounded by beauty

Sense! Sense Beyond. (ranting)

Learning

(regularly updated for accuracy)

The way we see beauty shows how we perceive life in general. There’s no rigid standard of beauty. Each person votes beauty based on the culture nurturing him/her. The culture formulate beauty through space and time and unsensed dimensions with which it evolves and grows through the history of humankind.

To a female best friend a beautiful man can only be postulated through a man named Nicholas Saputra. To another a beautiful man is Keanu Reeves–this one I agree 😎. To another Jeremy Renner. To me a beautiful man can be as acceptable as a humble man is kind-hearted, responsible and healthy.

To a male best friend a handsome woman can only be described through a slim lady with flawless porceline skin and red lips like those modified ones from Korea. To another one a handsome woman is a Sandra Bullock. To another one is Rihanna. To else she can be anyone who is willing to accept their men the way they are.

In China, Africa, Europe, Java, Pacific definitions of beauty can be poles apart. Big eyes, round eyes, almond shaped, slanted…. Full lips, thin, thick, wide, heart-shaped…. XS clothing size, S, M, L, XL, XXL, plus size…. Straight hair, wavy, curly…. Etc, etc, etc…. Those physical descriptions identifying human body are blessings to some, curse for others; depending on how the bearers perceive beauty.

Ladies, you are all beautiful the way you are when your heart blooms genuinely. That’s what I always tell my nieces. And to my nephews I always say you are handsome and becomes super handsome with kind heart. Physical beauty will only be an empty box wrapped in fancy paper, no gift inside, no meaning but a space of living. Well-taken-care-of plain beauty with kind heart is a box of surprising precious gift well wrapped in clean paper.

Which one should we want? Any! No right or wrong. Yet to me –an-almost-half-century-lady– kind heart in a plain beauty is so much appreciated!!! Nothing compares to good heart in humble beauty.

😊

To dear nieces and nephews:

I love you. Be the light to your own darkness with healthy body and good heart.

Your senses are not only to catch what’s physical. Sense beyond! Beauty truly lies in a hidden heart.

❣️

this might be the only Coldplay’s song that I can listen to the whole day non-stop except low-batt ♥️ a biutyful alien I am!

💕

Scattered

Learning, Poetic
I'm foraging beauty
On my way to work,
To shop,
To travel,
To eat out;
And
On my way to kitchen,
To balcony,
To a room,
To the loo.
Beauty is just scattered by
You.

—

white, yellow, fragrant, pretty, soon to dry then to produce seed for another orchid to bloom 💕

blooming time for the pigeon orchids along the Yio Chu Kang Road next to my office – this appearance can be seen in almost all of the big trees around this road

Perfect?

Learning, Poetic, This Person
Perfect, Beloved?
Universe dancing pattern
With risks and blessings--

—

there is no need to be perfect to be beautiful — it is just about expressing one’s self genuinely

picture from Pinterest

Serenity, Joy and Beauty

Learning, Poetic
This serene moment
Has brought me joy
That sparks beauty
Anywhere I am.

Let them interpret
A picture
As they wish.
That is their life.

Mine is here and now.
No one is accurate
In defining me
As serenity, joy and beauty
Is a luxury
Differently designed
For each of reality.

——

a line of serenity

me and myself in joy

even when tilting, my eyes see beauty 💕 not your definition of beauty, it is mine and mine only

Hidden

Learning
What’s hidden’s beauty
Admiring silently.
Reciprocity—

——

getting off from bus #857, i saw something silently looking at me as saying “hey, sweet heart how was your day?”

it’s this beauty!

Beauty

Learning, Poetic, This Person
When I was a girl
I admired my mother’s beauty;
Being a juvenile,
I admired my sisters’ and girlfriends’;
When adult,
I admired my idols’;
Getting more mature,
I admired flowers’;
All of which forgetting
The beauty in front of the mirror:

Now I admire no one’s,
But I appreciate everyone’s;
All through realising
The beauty reflected in the mirror.

——

beauty after beauty

beauty refreshed

tell your beautiful self “Thank you!”

Pink Beauty

Learning, Map It!, Poetic
Their eyes see pig pink.
She sees cherry blossom pink.
Pink can be anything, anywhere.
Not anyone though sees beauty in pink.
My heart is red
Yet it feels ever pink.

—-

cherry blossoms along JR Kobe Line 😍 — almost ten times visiting Japan and this is my very first experience of cherry blossoms

Shadow

Learning, Map It!, Poetic
Is it the shadow
Or the real you show to me?
Distinguished beauty—

—-

i can’t remember which one is the shadow and which one is the real — i don’t want to observe further to find which is which

what i know the castle is beautiful day and night 💝

Smile

Learning, life, love, Poetic, This Person
Smile, Beloved, smile.
It’s a luxurious gift
For you and for me.

—

I was checking my educational docs and was in awe to see my photos in each of different docs. How I am touched by physical transformation and what experiences attached to it, that makes me stay loyal with my own self whatsoever.

Tell yourself that your life is a journey that if you need buddy, you should pick those willing to share wonder. Otherwise, travel alone. 💝

Thank you!

💝

sleepy, angry, yet stop telling me to take a nap! 😂😂😂
classroom, my party time; playground, my party time, my childhood was everyday party! 👯‍♀️
no smile, no mercy 😃
length of hair defines how I treat the world; i love my pretty silly me! 😃

Colours

Learning, Poetic
The biggest secrets
Are sitting on the eyelids
Without disguising.

—

there’s a rainbow that beautifully hides in front of white cloud, subtly showing that life is alive as it is – good morning!
clearer before fading away

Flowers Bouquet

Learning, life, love, Poetic
Bouquet, Beloved,
A bunch of symbols arranged
Through fragrance and hues.

—

Amaryllis: strength and determination

Daffodil: honesty, truth and forgiveness

Eucalyptus: division of the underworld, earth and heaven (Aboriginal wisdom); inner and outer strength, leadership

Gladiolus: faithfulness and integrity

Lily of the valley: sincerity and joy

Sunflower: loyalty and unconditional love

Tendril: growth, softness, flexibility (Javanese wisdom)

Flowers Bouquet in water colour; 60%, waiting for the liquid frisket to block some colours before completion

Watching Beauty Decomposed

Learning, life, Poetic, This Person, Those People
Beauty, Beloved
Bodily fades. Beauty stays
Only as value:
Commitment, integrity.
Forever? Yes, forever.

—-

I won’t exchange anything in me with anything from any other beautiful, rich, sexy women who look happier and more successful because I love the way Mother Nature presents life through this very journey.

Watching physical deterioration is provoking yet amazing. Seeing my own picture from small girl to adult mature, it takes courage to tell myself that who was radiantly strong has grown to this dully weak. At the same time it takes courage to tell myself that who was carelessly egotistical has grown to this wisely humble.

Thanks so much for all the lessons and gifts. I won’t regret. 🐣

May all beings be happy.

Dedicated to: scammers who never stop trying stealing from others in one way or another – if you don’t have money, just stop shopping, don’t use others’ to satisfy your impulsive buying, lazybones!

this old guy is clear and accurate, the other two favourite: the apartment doorman and the psychologist – different spectrum of covert beauty

Life of A Flower

Learning, life, Poetic, This Person

It’s about flower in its life cycle.

A flower blooms, dries to fall off or falls to dry at time in place for a given moment. It lives then dies. It blossoms or prematurely drops.

Some flowers are admired, some are not even noticed. Some are vibrantly coloured, some are dead dull. Some are meticulous, some are straightly simple. Some produce edible fruits, some the poisonous.

It’s about flower, the beauty in itself, although most view points perceive the look differently. Absolute beauty sits where it is, lingering forever as values and concepts. Relative beauty fades away through aging, some even without being remembered as memory or history.

It’s about flower, the one in a palace and that in a lawn.

Salam. Alfatihah.

prominent, admired, blessed
unnoticed, hidden beauty, blessed
fall to dry, blessed
dried and ready to decompose, blessed

Beauty

Learning, Poetic
A wreath, Beloved,
A circle packed with beauty,
Arranged true colours—

——————————————————-

Dear Self,

When you’re bored, splash some paints! When you’re angry, splash some paints! When you feel happy, splash some paints! When you feel funny, splash some paints! When you get offended, splash some paints!

As honest as you to you when you’re alone, your colours speak the truth.

Yours truly,

Your own self 💞

a wreath waiting for the final touch 🎨

Beauty

Learning, Poetic
Wasted it’s never
If blooming or not. Pretty
In its full cycle.

——————————————————

Blessed again with 5 beautiful flower stems, accompanied by other beautiful growing not blooming orchids.

Beauty is not only in the flower. It is in the root, leaves, keiki, pot and their presence everyday.

Salaam.

🐣

balcony #1
balcony #2
balcony #3
bathroom window sill #1
bathroom window sill #2

Beauty

Learning, life, love, Poetic, This Person
Beauty, Beloved,
Prescribed by culture; differed
Through one’s perspective—

————————————————————

When I was young, I faced difficulty in describing beauty. It was always society’s perspective taken. A question of “why beauty is so rigid” remained preserved.

Getting more mature, I got more freedom to describe what beauty was and found there was wider spectrum of what beauty was.

Now beauty is in everything everywhere as the eyes are not only seeing things through what’s culturally ascribed or prescribed. They have achieved a point that what are unlimitedly created can be freely appreciated. And, so is beauty—

We are created by The Beautiful who loves beauty. Why would not see all through the eyes of the creator?

May all beings be happy.

not perfectly beautiful coz it would dig my wallet too deeply if I wanted more; this is perfectly matched my beautiful day though and that’s perfect! 💝