Tag: free verse

If there is a mystery, it is
You.
You appear in the door of my heart
As a surprise.
Is that really you?
Or a ghost assigned to test?
If it is truly you, be you.
If it is a ghost, be gone.

You

Although everyday
I want to say to
You anything I want to say
But say not as I bet
You know how I feel,
You know what I wish,
You know whom I miss,
You know and
You know.

One day heaven knows which day
I will say to
You anything I want to say
Everyday although
You know how I feel,
You know what I wish,
You know whom I miss,
You know and
You know.

You

That I miss
You is out of question.
Yet does it matter if
You have one closest place within me
Where I can whisper to
You about stories of my daily hope,
About  plans beyond my here now?
Only to
You--

I don't have to shout to the world about how much I wish to be with
You because
They don't need to know.

I don't have to show to the audience about how much I wish to hear from
You because
This softest prayer is one of the most clangorous wishes.

You

They say loving intensely is a waste.
No.
Loving you intensely is simply
Throwing you a sweet smile,
Holding your hand,
Walking with you,
Sitting in silence next to you,
Staring the same scenery,
Breathing the same air,
Humming a tune that some day heaven knows which day
Only love does matter.

About Books

What are you reading today?
Said I to myself.

I did read pages of books
Seen in my favourite bookstore,
Met in MRT, the mall, the restaurant and on my way.
They all were read by me that life is either difficult or light, easy or heavy,
Yet none wanted to leave among the disarray.

Do they love their life?
Maybe yes, maybe no
But they were willing to stay,
Living in their own way
To finish writing their stories
With a
Happy ending.

How should I write my book?
I plan a 
Happy ending
When only love matters.
In the writing
I use my own letters.

the 3 on top must be completed by end of Oct then i will read other thinner books; otherwise i can’t achieve 2024’s reading target — i am competing with myself to achieve better than myself last year

this year 4 of the books i read are based on recommendation; thanks for recommending the good books — i skip some recommended though with some reason

among all books i’ve read some have changed the way i perceive life: Ernest Hemingway’s The Old Man and The Sea, Jack London’s The Call of The Wild, Quraish Shihab’s Jilbab, Paulo Coelho’s The Alchemist, Bhagavad Gita, and several others — all those writers are collaborating to teach me how i should dismantle my rigid thought about life and so i’ve been gradually set free as a human being

when i like a book, i will read it again and again; fyi, i seldom scribble on my books, so i put post-it or book-markers or just a piece of paper between interesting pages — many of my books are dog-eared but mostly clean

every reader has one’s own habit to love one’s points of reading

😊

Be You

Learning, life, love, Poetic, This Person

Be playful, dear self
At the same time
Be kind.
Be free
To be who
You truly are
Although to do it
You've got to sneak out
For a while.

I won't lose you,
Hey little sweet girl in me.

1,000’s

Learning, love, Poetic, This Person

I'm a soul of thousands of years,
Traveling through space and time
To introduce a flow of notes
Performing a play
Full of poems.

Someday the story will be
Composed in prose.

Do you care to read,
Beloved?

Vulnerable

Learning

How can I be loved? Asked I.

She said:
There's no way out
But in;
To bravely expose
The beauty within
To the beast without,
To sincerely open
The beast within
To the beauty without.

Getting yourself observed,
Criticised,
Appreciated,
Evaluated,
Complimented,
Gossiped,
Praised,
Judged through
Word and look
As sharp as
Guillotine.

Being vulnerable
Is amazingly
Magical--
It gives victory
To an exhausted troop
Right before
They fall into an abyss
Of despair.

Be
Vulnerable,
That's the way to be
Loved.

whatever they say, i prance lightheartedly — my dreams are beyond what they think 💕

A Path to Destination

Learning

Beloved,
It is about whether or not
The path is walked.
Not about prediction,
Not about opinion,
Not about hurting or getting hurt,
Not about giving up,
Not about result.

This journey is
Mine.
The destination is
You.
The end is
Heaven knows.

Today’s dinner

please don’t judge hungry stomach — today was another reading, cooking and eating plus a bit of napping, laundry was missed and will be done tomorrow night after office 😎

this plate is a work of 3-hour labor of an amateur: potato perkedel (potato hash mixed with minced beef), fried rice with corn in Balinese sambal matah & teri kacang (my 1st attempt soooo challenging, too sweet, almost giving up, next time better with different recipe) – yay❣️

i made chicken soup for my own soul and my friend sent me sourdough from her bakery — alhamdulillah….

RAMBUTAN!!! 😍 exotic tropical fruit

My Life Is Poetry

My life is poetry
I recite in solitude.
As short as Basho's haiku,
As long as Bhagavad Gita--

No ears are to hear,
No critic is to review,
As private as a fetus in the womb, dearly loved--
As hidden as an unexplored cave, well protected--

There will be time when it travels out
To a place called a meadow of flowers
Where words become meaningless,
Senses truthfully shout.

That day I'll recite my life
To that whom I truly endear.
That day I'll sing my song
About the love I truly adhere.

a humble life is a tiny drop of water pushing out ripples on a placid pond– hidden and loved

Dear Sky

Learning, love, Poetic, This Person

Looking for one face behind the cloud,
I meet a smiling sky whispering
"Land and meet one while your feet are on the ground."

Dear sky,
How paradoxical this dream is!
I've dreamt of a perfect angel
Only to find that the perfect is a real sample of imperfection.
How paradoxical this fear is!
I've been afraid of imperfect ghost
Only to see that the imperfect is a real specimen of perfection.
How paradoxical that both perfection and imperfection reside in the same home!

Step by step
I crawl down from the bed
And go to the garden
Where I guess singing birds are hopping from one swaying twig to another,
Butterflies are flying around bright coloured flowers.
What I find is silent dews gliding on sleepy leaves,
Dragonflies perching on tips of coarse leaves.
They're though real and I befriend with a verse of beauty.

Dear sky,
Always bring me naked truth with which I can be real.

Thank you.

it’s not where i want to find you; if you’re there, i will immediately leave you because it mustn’t be the real you

💕

Dear Time

Do you walk or do you fly?
You're gone with memories,
Forgotten through yourself.

Do you melt or do you evaporate?
You disappear from busy days,
Buried by yourself.

Do you love or do you mock?
You hide behind the light,
Escaped into yourself.

Do you know or do you not?
You become yesterday, today then tomorrow,
Celebrated as yourself,

Dear time.

picture from Pinterest

Lotus You Are

Silently I pass by,
You gracefully nod to me
Like my mom waving hand at me.

Lotus,
You're there observing me
And others living so busy.
You're mute witnessing
How hectic human's life can be,
No second can be wasted
To earn
Yet every breath is missed
To learn.

lotus in the hotel court yard

in silence witnessing life

Roses You Are

Roses,
You are bright
As bright as her eyes
When finding the way
And she's relieved.

Roses,
You are shiny
As shiny as her hair
When reflecting the sunray
And she's radiant.

Roses,
You are prickly
As prickly as her mood
When getting hurt
And she's fiery.

Roses,
You are wild
As wild as her rage
When becoming uncontroled
And she's sorry.

Roses,
You are quiet
As quiet as her composure
When realising the truth
And she's calm.

Roses,
You are muted
As muted as her body
When taking a rest
And she's refreshed.

Roses,
You can be everything
As complete as her existence
When getting enlightened
And she's humbled.

everytime in-room dining is served, a stem of rose in a vase will accompany the food

once done, the tray will be taken back and i ask for permission to put the rose in the vase in the room

and at the end of my stay there will be roses as many as how many times i choose to dine in the room than to go out (recently being evening lazed mode on)

You

I wish I know
You better
So there won't be useless tears falling to long for
You.

I wish to meet
You now
So there won't be useless words
Uttered in secret for
You.

I wish to be with
You, too
So there won't be useless thought dancing restlessly for
You.

But I won't force to be with
You soon
As the timing is predestined by and arranged for 
You.

counting my falling hair before finally meeting you

💕

Kitchen Love

Dear kitchen,
I promise you
To love you
As long as
You let me sing
While cooking.

grilled saba from my kitchen and friends from outside (i ate 1.5 saba….)

i’m crazy about deep fried & carrot – all from my kitchen

the chicken in the heart shaped bowl is garang asem, favourite! my kitchen loves me!

If I Were A Scent

Musée du Parfum Fragonard

If I were a scent,
I would be herbal.

If I were a scent,
I would be flowers.

If I were a scent,
I would be sandalwood.

If I were a scent,
I would be musk.

If I were a scent,
I would be sea breeze.

If I were a scent,
I would be mountain dew.

What other scents could
I become?
Floral?
Oriental?
Woody?
Fresh?

If I were a scent,
I would be anything that's
Loved to breath in by
You.

Goes Down On Her Knees, Prays

Her heart aches,
She needs some medicine
And so she goes down on her knees and prays
For clarity.

She hopes soon her tips of fingers can touch clearly
Whether it is pulsating
Of better future
Or potentially repeated puncture.

Show me his way.

fastbreaking today — bismillah

i booked a table in my favourite Japanese resto as i wanted to enjoy their crab but no table was available at my preferred time

so i bought kanikama as the frozen crab was not available either in dondondonki

….randomly mixed it with whatever i had

i needed rice but not much time to cook it

…. ok

not bad at all to start this evening

japanese restaurant, see you on sunday

Whatever You Say, It’s My Day

Learning, life

Whatever you say, Beloved,
It's my day.
I've built it through seconds, minutes, hours.
Just because others use extended brain,
Doesn't mean I will.
I live my true life
Even without a perfect "1100100" score given.
Whatever you say, Beloved,
It's my day.

no artificial intelligence is involved in my writing process except if my brain is considered one

using AI in my thinking and writing process is haram 🤓

haram is not related to any religion standpoint, it simply means i will never use it until professionally mandated in my work which i believe will not happen — will never use it for my poem and ranting of mine

😺

Falling In Love

I asked myself about
Falling in love.

My brain said
Falling in love is scary.
I could not concentrate,
I dropped what I carried,
These tears came down miserably,
Dizzy, oh dizzy!

My heart said
Falling in love is beautiful.
I could imagine what was best,
I shared what I carried,
These tears came down happily,
Pretty, oh pretty!

My soul said
Falling in love is magical.
I could think beyond what was,
I multiplied what I carried to share,
These tears came down with no reason,
Willingly, oh willingly!

Someone said
Falling in love is inevitable.
It filled me when I was hungry,
It emptied me when I was full,
Do, just do
However dizzy or pretty, do it only willingly!

I checked who was the last speaker:
Damn! My stomach was smiling in glee.

scary, beautiful, magical and inevitable

Dear Life

Do you know that the road I've taken is not what I wanted?
And do you know that this is the best I've experienced?

Yes, you know.

Thank you.

Yours truly,

One humble traveler breathing your blessings

Overflown

I'm a room
Overflown with blessings.
Some visible,
Some unseen,
All undeniable--

this is where water, soil, air and fire show their potential in harmony, no collision

I Can’t Yet I Can

I can't talk about
You all the time,
People will think I am crazy
Or crazy about
You.

But how can I
Stop thinking about
You, while obviously
You are everywhere
I am?

blaming why a plate seems empty but actually full of unseen material

aka

what is wanted is obvious, but there is no way — don’t blame the guest standing in front of the door, blame the host not responding to the greeting

Without Teacher

Learning, life, love, Poetic, This Person, Those People

What am I
Without teacher?
A lost wanderer
Losing destination.

What am I
Without teacher?
A confused traveler
Losing guidance

What am I
Without teacher?
A dreamer
Losing inspiration.

What am I
Without teacher?
A human
Losing meaning.

What am I
Without teacher?
A Soul
Repeating the same mistakes.

Dear
Teacher,
You are born
For me
To be reborn
As me.

I'm grateful to
You.

Today’s lunch break was about a phenomenal chat with some teachers of life.

Thousands if not millions of teachers have taught me in life. There are some that I cherish the most today, those that have triggered me to make biggest decisions in life.

Thank you, dear teachers❣️

Bapak Merta Ada, he was the one teaching me to go within without doubt, without limit – “spread love and compassion”, his advice 🥹

Sister Zak, my Arabic teacher — she emphasised that what we read needs to be well understood first then pondered then can be interpreted (differently) — “be a responsible interpreter of the Quran for yourself, no one to blame when you make wrong interpretation or decision“, her advice

Aaron Cass, my mentor in Beshara School who helped me open most doors of freedom of responsibly being human through his amazing knowledge and wisdom about sufism and esp about Ibn Arabi & Rumi — “from now on whatever you do differently, never make it a new religion”, his advice

Ina, a best friend from high school whose action moved my soul: she left her brilliant career (at the same time I started mine in Singapore) without new career to take care of her parents for her sense of responsibility; she took care of her mother until she passed away, now she is taking care of her father; Ina, you are beautifully blessed — “let’s exchange stupid memes and videos”, her message

dear Ibu, i won’t let anyone hurt you — “work responsibly and take care”, her every morning’s advice

Vito, my dear nephew, “i will always love you and protect you forever”, his last message before he passed

the fire warden in the mirror, “have you smiled today?” my greeting to myself

Dear Master

Learning

Dear Master,
Fill this lake
With wisdom
To keep on
Flowing through rivers,
Permeating through earth veins
Towards
You

RC Gorman’s work of art

Water War

Learning, Poetic, Those People

Today
The war was cool
Under the water
With some kids
Who know
Only fun!

look at those 3 teenagers — they shot me with a water gun under the water while i was swimming; they thought i would be annoyed, i said to them “hello” when i breathed in above the water then we became friends, they moved aside when i was passing by — thank you, sweet rascals 😀😘

i saw they did the same to other swimmers 😂👍🏽

i think i have fewer and fewer reasons to ignore blessings in this life

Our Math

Math of Life, Beloved
Shows beautiful spectrum.

Your equation is 
Complex and with confound.
Mesmerizing.
Mine is
Basic and blunt.
Energizing.
The only same factor is
X and Y that sit at the front.

Math of Life though is fun,
Solved with nothing to be done--

RC Gorman’s work of art

Dipped