Restart

A background
Is redone.
A painting
Is restarted
Again
And again
And again.
Maybe one morning
She will restart
One more
And finally get it done.
There is peeping light
Highlighting the canvas
Naturally
Glowing with a new story
Sweeter to tell.

—-

i don’t know when this work is going to complete – it is constantly a new start because of the artist’s unprofessional insecurity

the recipient is impatiently waiting, a deadline must be set — ok, ok 🙏🏼

Essential

Essentially pure?
None. No distiller’s perfect
But time. Refining—

—

Smell might be my strongest sense. It gives me both pleasant and not so pleasant experiences in life. To share the experiences is of course an ultimate goal, yet it takes time to materialise it.

To start

Have you smelled the earth wetted by rain water?

Have you smelled the grass cut in the morning, noon and afternoon?

Have you smelled your parents’ clean clothes?

Try those and you’ll be amazed with the sensation brought to you.

Salaam.

goal: to distill essential oils for myself and those around me — this is gonna be a read-it-when-i-want-it book ✨

May I?

May I
Sing a sweet song
With
You
Under glowing stars shooting
To leave their age?

May I
Sit silently
With
You
Under a quiet dusk rolling
To welcome dawn?

May I
Count the sheep
With
You
Under a dreamy night shining
To light a hope?

May I?

—-

may I eat gyoza? left over from last batch — so pleasing to eat my own food, almost like heaven 😁

Woodpecker’s Messages

She has heard bird news,
Sending messages
Through Morse Code.
Dots, dashes, spaces—

She has heard numbers, words, punctuations,
Telling stories
About no hope.
Acceptance, letting go, moving on—

She has heard songs, poems, winds,
Springing in heart
Warmly and gently.
Future is brighter only with clarity.

She has heard a woodpecker
Reminding her of signals and signs
In every dance of nature
To be enjoyed and understood.

She has heard of you
Giving blocks and traps
To redirect her to her own path
To happiness.

She has heard of heaven
Approving whatever she’d do
As long as she’s happy and safe
Without disturbing life.

She has heard
Dews imbuing morning to refresh,
Twilight whispering night to rest.
Life is truly a woodpecker’s Morse Code.

She has heard
And she closes her eyes,
But not ears
As long as she’s happy and safe.

Thank you, Michael Lai for again allowing me to use your poetic pictures to illustrate a poem of mine that has been poking me since forever. 🙏🏼

Bay Woodpecker Pecking a Hole in the Tree (4 Photos)

Stars

There are billions of stars
Swimming in the dark.
They are born and will die
After completing their spark.

With centers the stars travel
Flying as strong as sky larks.
They reach some terminal
Even without visible landmarks.

There’s a captain in the cockpit,
Pulled by a federation out there.
Stars won’t easily quit
Unless there’s a common end to share.

Journey of a star

—-

Captain Picard — favourite capt 👍🏽

Mr. Spock 👍🏽 — favourite crew

✨

As Long As You Are Happy

Life is light
When she dances
And sings.
As long as you are happy,
She says.

—

smile, dance and sing! 😀 unbeatable when she takes good care of the child within 💝

Love & Work

I’ll love
No matter what
I’ll be over anyways.
I’ll work
No matter what
I’ll be over anyways.
There is me
Or not,
It might be the same.
Yet as long as there is me,
I’ll do what I can
To add more
Meanings
And
Utility
To my life.
I’ll love
No matter what
In life.
Life is good,
I won’t skip
A thank
And
Or
Cheers.

—

listen to love; it is everywhere 💕

Smile!

Smiling at a weekend
Makes air fresher and lighter.
A place that’s choking—

—

My best friend in Ubud is an active committee member of Bali Spirit Festival; she invites me to enjoy one day free pass after my Tapa Brata for today.

She knows very well I don’t enjoy crowd well yet she insisted that I try to experience an ambiance that might enrich my life. Thank you, I am now in.

I collected my wristband at the entrance, met my friend at the media center she managed then browsed around. A lot I didn’t imagine before. Not only the offered activities and products but also the visitors and participants.

While the activities and products are still easy for me to digest, the way the visitors dress is more shocking to me; half-naked might not be for myself but I can still understand that many bule (the white people in Indonesian language) are half-dressed due to hotter temperature in South East Asia, but almost naked…

Anyway my best friend has changed my curiosity into smiles— very wide smile….

I am enjoying my weekend!

the pink wristband for one day pass – got it free; thank you, De Nov!

the inner entrance inside Puri Padi Hotel where the festival is taking place

map

loving it!

another one

art is dominating the venue — loving it!

hungry? never worried 💝 — more choices other than this one

my favourite!

still heliconia 💝

one of those blinding me (the mildest for my eyes, that almost naked lady with backpack) — this is not a beach please…. 😎 i don’t have the heart to take more pictures 😏 i know what my friend will say to me “that’s why you can’t live in Bali, stay in Singapore, safer for your brain and mind”

stage for the (spiritual) music performance later afternoon — not being arrogant but after so much to learn and unlearn and relearn, to me all is spiritual without label so let me skip this spiritually-labeled music

this is the safest place for me to just drink tea and browse around aromatherapy oil in the market — will spend my time here until I meet my friend again ❣️

on a beanie bag under a young durian tree 💝

will i be back next time? 😁 Yoda said “your path you must decide, Jedi” 😂

Knowing Who

Knowing who’s within
Behind an unlocked door. Who?
Look at the mirror

—

Loving kindness doesn’t belong to one particular religion. It is not a domain, it is universal. Thanks for the consistent reminder about it.

May all beings be happy.

Salaam.

Pak Merta Ada with 7 of 32 students in his 881st Tapa Brata — thank you, Bapak 🙏🏼

Back Online

Life is just like this:
A line with two ends. Circle—
Choose the best angle.

—-

They released us from the silence on May 5 at 11am before lunch time and gave us our gadgets back at 4pm. We were so excited to talk than to play the gadgets; we gathered in the dining hall and shared what we experienced during the noble silence.

We didn’t die without gadgets, no we didn’t. Yet we don’t die because of gadgets, either. Gadgets are just a tool to use wisely.

Each of us couldn’t thank more for everything.

May all beings be happy.

Salaam.

Pak Merta, our meditation teacher

Pak Kourma — our daily instructor

Pak Souca — our daily caretaker 🙏🏼

our last session of meditation was loving kindness meditation for daily life; the video camera was prepared for sharing session at the end

Happy Birthday, U2!

May 5 is today.

This is my second Tapa Brata and both of them are special. My first in 2018 was special because Pak Merta Ada’s teacher (Merta Ada is my health meditation teacher) a Buddhist high priest visited his retreat center and gave us blessings. This second one is because we found that May 5 is his birthday! He was born on May 5, 1957 — a long journey of a meditation teacher and healer.

Someone is also celebrating his birthday across the ocean. May 5 becomes more special today this time. A journey of a silent traveler.

Happy birthday Pak Merta and dear KU. Both of you have a special place in my heart.

For Pak Merta, we immediately prepared a green sarung rangrang. For KU I thoughtfully prepared a poem.

—-

Alone the bird flies
From a nest on a tall tree
It knows where home is.

🙏🏼

May 5 2023 is when the biggest moon rises this year; Waisak (Vesak) is already celebrated in some countries (on May 6 in other countries) — my meditation teacher is celebrating his birthday, another life teacher of mine is celebrating his

an “emergency” birthday present for Pak Merta Ada from our class, wrapped in a beautiful fancy paper from the nearest small shop nearby to wrap a sarung rangrang I originally bought for my additional spread and table cloth — what a beautiful togetherness in this meditation class 💝

May 6 (scheduled post)

Alone the bird flies
To a nest on a tall tree.
She knows where home is.

—-

there is love in wing — trust the wind and the direction 💝

Good Morning from Ubud

It is a good morning
Maybe afternoon for you.
This morning I still breathe blessings
Wrapped by songs from the bird,
Back home by hum of machines.
Both are good
In a blessed morning.
Know, beloved
That I remember you
Who might enjoy the day
And ready to welcome a weekend.
Everything is good when in Ubud,
I know everything is good
Everywhere
If we let blessings contaminate the air.

—-

when i breath fresh air, i feel more me

good morning from Puri Saraswati

not a water person but love seeing water, quiet morning in front of the pool with birds singing and voice of sweep stick raking the ground

good morning to a lazy snail

another one

good morning to the unknown neighbour that might be still sleeping

Saturday Night in Central Ubud

Sky invites me
To swarm around a show
That is glistened with colours
In a Saturday night.

Rain almost falls
But is held until the show ends
Simply to tell me
You are welcome.

These steps walk me
To where blessings are.
These breaths inhale me
To where peace is.

Among the crowd I find a calmness
With my own self I find merriness
All is well
All is good

I enjoy Saturday night in Central Ubud.

i normally stay rather far from city center of Ubud but this one night i wanted to stay in the city where dance performances are located in many different spots — this is the side gate of Puri Saraswati Dijiwa Ubud opening to the lotus garden

tonight’s performance in lotus garden was Tari Janger (janger dance), maybe next time 🙏🏼

i wanted to watch Legong Dance performance so i walked to Pura Saren Ubud which was 200 meters away from where i stayed

was the first to enter to get a seat in the 1st row and later found it was not at all the 1st row 😂

seeing the preps is already exciting!

musicians were getting ready

Tari Pendet (welcoming dance) — i learnt this dance as a child, felt like wanted to laugh remembering how funny i was dancing with my sister 😂

Tari Topeng #1 — sorry i don’t know the name; watching with many types of spectators whose joy might be over the limit and blocks others’ view 😂

Tari Legong – the primary show 👏🏼

Tari Legong — i wanted to watch this simply because i have a sleeping gown with legong dancer on it 😀

Tari Oleg Tamulilingan

Tari Kupu-Kupu (butterfly dance) inserted as part of Oleg Tamulilingan

Tari Oleg Tamulilingan (dancing bees)

Tari Oleg Tamulilingan (dancing bee)

Tari Topeng #2 — sorry i don’t know the name

we didn’t know who was behind the mask but he did perform so well and we enjoyed it 💝

thanks for the show! 🙏🏼 happiness is an ambiance shareable with those we don’t know and we probably don’t care to know — God bless all 💝

Sanctuary

In sanctuary,
Where birds from paradise sing,
Clear mirror reflects—

—

Out of office is set meaning that work is safe-kept for a while. Only silence remains. Even my boss and my mother— two whose calls I’ll never reject in normal situation can’t contact me. They know where I am so they won’t contact me. 😎

All my postings will be automatically scheduled starting May 1.

I pray that you all be blessed with good life.

Salaam.

💝

my goddess, Saraswati 💝

just wanna be offline for a while 🌸

i love to be with those knowing how to reflect me and themselves clearly ♥️

it is safe 💝

accompanied by two paradise birds in Ubud before starting my sacred silence tomorrow in Baturiti

Almost Birthday

It almost arrives.
A blessed day,
The one when
A generation is born
To share what may
And
To bear what shall.

Happy birthday!

—-

a prayer is recited — health and happiness with the loved ones 💝

Best Not, Better Be

What’s best is not best.
Better is, leaving a space
For the next better.

—-

I am never craving for best for me. Only doing my best to be better and to deserve whatever makes me better and/or see opportunity to do better.

Yet best seller book is the best for today. And one previously best seller for my best friend—-

Salaam.

💝

bestseller shelf — not my normal shelf but it was today

old book i did read at uni and want to check some details and so re-read 😎

curious what’s inside 😍

seems promising for a discussion in a reading club

for my best friend who watched the movie but not read the novel yet

Cuts and Bruises

All cuts and bruises
Paint a life of a blossom
Before it decays.

—

i was so young and innocent, a loved friend of many, a hated enemy of some — i was so much blessed 💝

life has brought me travel through labyrinth of life with traps and turns that cut and torture yet i am still a loved friend of many, a hated enemy of some — i am still so much blessed with cuts and bruises 💝 i’ve lost much but i find myself

no one shall erase this happy girl within — a blessed soul that travels through space and time 🙏🏼 thank you

Wildly Grows

That flower is born
By wind and gardener’s love.
Celebrating life—

—-

the pretty zinnia in my sister’s garden are all wild, she never intentionally grows them, they just popped out of the soil, she believes they were spread from the neighboirs’ as some of our neighbours have them in their garden — we don’t know if our neighbours also unintentionally grow them with the same reason as ours 😁

The Best Sushi

I said
I want to eat sushi.

Let’s go
She said.

We lend each other’s ears.
I like listening,
She likes to be listened.
What a perfect scene.

I’ll take the mushroom, you take the eggplant
She said.

I said
I prefer eggplants, that is nice.

Haaaah!

Hahaha wasabi!
She laughed.

Anything to share?
She asked.

No
Said I.

She drove me home and hugged me good bye.
Her son said “See ya again!”

Then I walked the path home
To write stories of my own.
I regretted to share bad stories with anyone,
It made good food taste stale.

I won’t,
Until there’s the best sushi to offer.

—-

iftar with a best friend yesterday — one of the best sushi in Singapore 😘

Time Flies

Time flies on a plane, 
Moves backwards leaving a home
To meet whom are missed.

—-

Time to visit mother. Although I visit her every three months, a visit on Eid Mubarak is always the most special. It is when my brothers and sisters meet me and most of extended family members gather in our annual reunion.

It is exciting to have a full day chatting, laughing, remembering good memories, eating specialties cooked by the host, joking around and of course praying for our happiness and joy so we all can meet again the following year.

Thank you for another year.

💝

pink orchid in Changi Airport before my flight

pink orchid left home — not merrier but fresher than the Changi’s 🥰

yellowish white orchid left at home

it is gonna be broken white with purple — they are always happy although left home 😁

i guess it is gonna be yellow — they are always happy although left home 😁

Maleman

Breathing the same air
Under the same sun and moon,
All pray for good days.

—

Sharing is not only about self satisfaction and social support, it is also about gauging how much I dare to let go of what heavy and significant. Trust me giving will not make you poor.

This monthly food sharing is about Ramadhan odd night and night of revelation (lailatul qadar).

Salaam.

💝

package for some elderly people and tricycle drivers who deserve food sharing back in my mother’s town 💝
what’s inside
while the monthly food sharing is without kue apem, this maleman food sharing is with kue apem 💝
5 big monthly package for nuclear family 💝
what’s in the big package 💝

Resting My Case

When a lady goes,
Two dogs race with her, saying
See you again, friend!

—-

Completing the mosque night in Jakarta, I hopped to the next island. I have a holiday in lieu as I was working outside Singapore in its public holiday so why not meeting my friend in Bali to spend my Monday?

This good friend is a Buddhist, a devoted pupil of Dalai Lama. She has met him four times in person in Dharamshala. So it is a good thing to discuss about the news circulated about him; the sooner, the better for me to clear my hazy mind.

I explained to her my understanding about sexual harassment and abuse and the video that has made what might be called framing or true case depending on what brings to whom. She listened to me patiently. Then she explained to me quite long and clear about the Tibetan culture of “tongue eating” not “tongue sucking” and mostly about what kind of person Dalai Lama whom she has met and shaken hand with. She also asked me to watch the complete video, not only some part of it so I can build clearer context.

We had a long talk. Based on the chat l decided to delete my posting about Dalai Lama, not because I totally agree with my friend but simply because I don’t want to make things more unclear. Resting my case—

Waiting doe my flight with a light heart—

Salaam.

Pablo Picasso and Salvador Dali, my friend’s dogs

Fragrance

Who are friends, my dear?
The perfumers? The blacksmiths?
Whoever, they smell.

—-

Disclaimer: I am not spreading Islamic teaching. I am just telling how fragrance and good friends have manifested in my life.

—-

The most frequent gift I give to my closest female circle is fragrance, either perfume or soap. Yesterday morning before meeting my best friends, I decided to browse some fragrance. As normal there is never preferred brand about perfume. It is always about a click in the heart.

Indeed happiness can cost some $/c although it might be too small and can be an insult if given as currency; yet it must cost attention and/or time to appreciate the same. So perfume is a best option — no one has complained so far.

What about soap? Only to those preferring soap to perfume

I am happy to make myself happy by making my circle happy because they have been making me happy. Imagine your friends feel good and be scented at the same time.

This I do because I follow literally beautiful hadith by the Prophet as below.

Abu Musa reported: The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Verily, the parable of good and bad company is that of a seller of musk and a blacksmith. The seller of musk will give you perfume, you will buy some, or you will notice a pleasant smell. As for the blacksmith, he will burn your clothes, or you will notice a bad smell.”

Source: Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 5534, Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2628

Authenticity grade of hadith: Muttafaqun Alayhi (authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim

couldn’t help smelling all