graphs of my Universe
The tree sows thousands of seeds
That fly to all directions
And never return
Until the wind stands up
And calls.
Which seeds come back?
Any
That hear a mother
Beautifully sings with love
Humbly whispers with peace
About home
Full of
Love.
——
this is how much beautifully humble my mother is — with that she has been highly respected by those surrounding her; I won’t be as respected as she is yet I want to at least preserve some part of her humbleness 💚
Everything is centred.
My mother.
Everything is meaningful.
My mother.
Everything is wisdom.
My mother.
——
she was meeting her doctor for medical review on her birthday today — she said her health and children are the best gift forever 💕
Ibu and me in Jabal Rahmah (Mount of Love), 2016 — wishing our love spread to everyone around us
a tumpeng by me for my mother, sent via WhatsApp 🙂
There’s a seed
Called self
Needing love
And care
And consistency
To grow,
To glow,
To everlastingly flow.
——
started fermented rice water to treat my long hair — this one is black rice + rose tea + lime
shampoo bar and conditioner bar made of longsheng rice that is used by the Red Yao women for their beautiful long hair — after using these bought bars, I plan to make my own shampoo bar from Indonesia rice and conditioner liquid from boiled flaxseed water
💕
all in the name of self care because no one cares about myself but me
💚
Mirror,
Mirror
On the wall!
Show me clearly
Afterall
What’s been
Lingering
In this fall.
Whether massive darkness
Or just shadow
That crawls.
——
only selfie when feeling good and truly willing to see what’s reflected by the mirror
Fragrance of sambac
Ferries the wish to the love
Reborn with new scents.
——
The death of my beloved nephew at young age (22 yo) is one extreme turning point in how I see life and what is in it.
I am not sad anymore and not considering it a loss anymore. Just drying tears and grateful smiles so — remembering how good his life was. How someone with so big mental wound could survive life by serving others in such a fun witty ways. 🥰 We now know how much we loved him and how tremendously he loved us.
Yet….
reborn
not interested in talking in group except for work;
prefer seeing life more lightly yet deeply at the same time;
choose to seclude myself by doing what I can do genuinely; if not, I will stay away;
respond to human interaction differently and it might have hurt people in outer rings; it doesn’t matter
still the same human being yet not the same anymore;
so amazed how losing loved ones can change someone so significantly. And the reality shows me whom are real and unreal, true and untrue…. 💚
Life is mysteriously beautiful.
Thank You so very much!
Alfatihah.
my younger brother’s 1st son was a newborn death; my older brother’s sons: one died at 10, the other at 22 — wishing them to be reborn with love, prosperity and luck 💕😊 you’re (always) in my heart and (sometimes) at my left wrist, boys! 💕💕😊
Journey becomes light
When promise is fully paid.
The breeze flows sweetly.
——
beautifully ready for melukat this morning to clean and clarify my life intension and for my dearest nephew ♥️ now his wish for melukat is fully paid — live happily in the other side, my dear 💕 and I have a good feeling that my life is on the right path with my heart losing no love
melukat in Tirtha Empul when it was still quiet this morning — no, I don’t like crowd 🙏🏼 don’t bring me to noisy parties!
This life’s pilgrimage
Spiralling in to the core
Of old house within.
——
a mosque in Tokyo — Tokyo Jamii (Camii)
entrance — assalamualaikum, Tokyo Camii
mosque area – 2nd floor
i still know how to do sholat tahiyatul masjid (praying to respect mosque), recite QS Arrahman that is full of gratitudes and praises so i did it
the feel was exactly like when i pray in the temples and shrines
a feeling of home 💕
then a beautiful sister helped me with photo taking — she made me much taller, slimmer yet less me 😁 thank you 💕
time to fly home — thank you, Tokyo 💕
you make me love myself more and more, with all the wounds and scars
They have said
I am lost.
What I see…
I am in a forest away
From comfort of thought.
I am not in a castle
In which mind is blunted.
My heart finds home
In which 25 prophets
And 1000 saints
Have found the paths.
It is a way
That all Prophets and Saints bless.
I am home
With the flow
That brings petals
To where fragrance blends
With clarity of fluids,
Various fluids
Gliding to a vast ocean
Of love.
——
i don’t care anymore what i am called by them — Muslim? Alhamdulillah, Sufi? Subhanallah, Buddhist? Masya Allah
what i am sure of is that my sutra is sutra of love with which all prophets and saints have travelled, whatever religions they have been associated with
thank you
💕
There are two gateways
To enter one gallery
Full of works of art.
——
my left side of face is sadder, bitter and negative with which i’ve been made more and more accepting to unwelcoming sides of life 💕
my right is happier, sweeter and optimistic that has persuaded me to be more and more letting go of what is not working after some good deed 💕
whatever unpleasant and pleasant things others say about me, i feel complete with some gap that might not need to be bridged simply to show that imperfection is a perfect gift in life 💕
Note: the picture at the bottom is batik scarf designed by Dudung Aliesyahbana, a batik maestro from Pekalongan, Central Java
💕
work from remote in people’s thought
it is more than enough to have this in my work from remote to accompany my mother and….
…. to take off celebrating what good about life – one of them is he whose love to life is like cool water 😁 💕
This heart blooms and blooms
Leaving quiet budding season,
Emerging from mud.
——
One of my friends complained why all my poems are about love, like I am either falling in love or broken hearted day by day.
After some time of chat and juice against wine glasses that friend answered one’s own question.
“Ya! Life is about loving: smoothly or broken-heartedly. Now I know what you mean. I thought all were about romance! Ahhh!”
I tried a sip of wine from that friend’s glass.
“You’ll get drunk more at home and write more love poems!” Said that friend laughing.
“Yes, I won’t give up this love whatever interpretation is thrown about me to me. I am thankful enough to have very few true friends who understand.”
Salaam.
true love is too tasteless for those weighing it with money; yet too complex for those weighing it with faith — for those not knowing the true secrets behind words, love is just a marriage between distrust and fear hidden in sparkling plastic 🙃 i know love is still beautiful whether it is well understood or misunderstood 💕
Love is not leaving.
Kernel then seedling then tree;
Stays yet multiplies—
——
After some journey and some work finally dinner was here now and it was an unforgettable one.
This long dragged day is nothing compared to today’s dinner. A dinner accompanied by a poem.
Yes my life is full of flower.
Thanks for the blessings!
Salaam.
♥️
sure it is about flowers — thanks much! i feel a tiny love bouncing and getting bigger and bigger in my heart when eating
they put it under my green tea; what a sweet creativity this restaurant demonstrates — will never forget this!
This love is a math
With numbers operated
For an x to solve
——
The x is always the most stubborn to solve. Or, just not even wanting to solve 😊
Walking the aisle
Two smiling earthlings can’t stop waving hands
To us
Who wonder
“They were toddlers we hugged,
Now they read solemn vow?”
It is a happy day
When we pray, laugh and eat together
Witnessing happiness that proceeds.
——
Matt, my best friend’s youngest son is getting married today! Matt and Cheer, Tante Rike happy for you 😘😘😘 send me all our pictures ♥️
cheering with groom’s mama after eating 😂 day is good with those looking forward to bright days ♥️
There’s a crook
I can’t understand.
It is when I saw
You in silence
And said in heart
“I find no reason in
You for me to love but
What is this emotion?”
There’s another
I can understand.
It is when I felt
A warm summer
And said in heart
“There’s enough reason to love
You in silence
That forever blooms.”
No reason is needed to love
For love is blind.
Yet there’s reason to keep the love
For love is the only kind.
It’s time
When it’s time.
——
my orchids after one week left home alone
welcome! my orchids have taught me that flowers bloom when it’s time; not to be seen, not to be picked, not to be admired; they’re blooming simply to bloom — there’s only one reason to understand: it’s time
what is her ID? unknown and still beautifully blooming
with a line of my white shirts hanging as the background, this oncidium is gonna be yellow
another stem of oncidium waiting for its timing to greet me with yellow
dendrobium peeps again — thank you
dendrobium from the same cluster in the same pot that keeps greeting me with health and happiness
You’re my best omiyage
From wherever Nihon
I visit.
You’re my desperate love songs
I sing
From wherever corner of the world
I sit.
You’re my sweet mystery
That I can never solve.
Why
Oh why,
Dear
Omiyage?
I present
You to only
Those that I love.
Wrapped in white
Ribboned in red
Wished in indigo
Dear
Omiyage
——
Japanese omiyage is the same tradition of Javanese oleh-oleh in which local souvenirs are brought for others after traveling to a specific place or simply when visiting. So it is not just random souvenirs, omiyage or oleh-oleh is a token of experience sharing and caring friendship from someone to someone else.
A sweet gesture that will be perfect when done with sincerity and mindfulness—
Salaam.
Niigata rice, the best omiyage for good friends this time — humble ladies, see you tomorrow 🙏🏼
About omiyage
With no white towel
I surrender
To the realm that hugs this heart.
I am water flowing
With no effort
To the ocean that waits for this mind.
How would this name
Say no to a call that sings love songs?
I submit everything
With a smile
And grace.
Body, mind, spirit and soul—
-
Jun 10, 2023
when the air taps my whole reality
with everything subtle and overwhelming
——
please excuse my strong arms 😀
after the Tapa Brata my classmates and I are still escorted to meditate everyday of 60 minutes for 90 days
it should be 36th day today but i only have 33 days in which i am able to do full meditation — in fact my doctor was quite surprised that unbelievable progress is indicated in better numbers from the laboratory test result after i meditate regularly — happy tears 🥹
my health is much better with calmness that is on track and harmonious thought that builds gradually
i’ve registered to next level Tapa Brata next Sep so i can get more benefits to help certain issues in this beloved aging body and to strengthen my mind
can’t wait to meet with the wise teachers who guide us and humble caretakers who help us with daily needs in Forest Island 🥰
i don’t know for sure what i can share from my achievement through meditation yet maybe someday i can help others reduce health complaints at low cost — i’ve always wanted to cure diseases with fragrance and herbs; my high intelligent friends said “pseudoscience, a crap wrapped in fancy paper”, i said “it doesn’t matter at least i can help them feel calmer and think positive”
all what happen in my life are like magic both the unexpected and expected — i hope my meditation brings more good magical celebrations to me and my beloved family and friends
and all…
May All Beings Be Happy
💕
What’s romance, my love?
Is roses stay in the branch
With no disturbance.
They’re unpicked until falling
Gracefully kissing the earth.
——
Yogyakarta is one of the most romantic cities on earth, where life is automatically slowing down and love can be felt sweeter, simpler and longer; my friends said “the most romantic or the cheapest?” i said cheerfully “i love cheap things that make me happy including cheap friends, people with high maintenance cost please go away” 😄
one serene night in Stasiun Tugu
How’s life, dear pearls of friendship?
Your shadow flashed in the tips of these eyes
All of a sudden.
I wish you all good heart
That shines
Through the orbits
Of all friendly comets
That travel the universe
Bringing verses
About love and friendship
That last forever
With the expanding universe.
You are truly loved
And missed….
——
Brisbane 2017 with Mbak Wien, my friend back in uni the only person able to make me sit in a club for almost 5 hours in a riverbank of a Brisbane river (not sure what river it was though), yet she was not successful to make me drink but jugs of orange juice
a loving daughter and sister, a wife of a kind man, a mother of 2 brilliant boys, a rather crazy friend
when will i see you again? maybe some day when i’m back to down under
God bless you 💝 and all my dear friends 💝
I started teaching this morning. Overall I’ll be teaching English, soft skills, art and hopefully someday Japanese. I partner with my best friend to establish a free weekend class for the kids and youth in her small library in south area of Yogyakarta. It is a community support that we humbly provide for a better leadership and communication skills of our young generation.
We have very very very limited budget but we commit to help the community not only to welcome but also to design bright future.
Pray for us.
May all beings be happy.
children class this morning — very very basic communication skills of reading, writing, listening, speaking — what a sweet fun session! 💝
these two girls were the youngest students today 💝
…
Passed the crossroad;
Grasses are greener,
Flowers are prettier,
Breeze is thinner,
Morning is fresher,
Day is busier,
Night is calmer,
Birds are happier,
Cicadas are louder,
Fireflies are brighter,
No snake, no crocodile, no tiger.
Passers-by smile at each other
With neither pride nor prejudice.
End is farther,
It doesn’t matter.
It’s a low key path
After a detour from a glowing avenue.
She is humming the softest beauty with light breathing while celebrating the richness of abundant blessings.
No other ways are nicer.
——
Campuhan Ridge Walk 🥰
Dear, oh
Dear….
You came from
Nowhere
Destroying my scores!
No wonder the soundtrack of my stories
Became messy.
Go eat fish,
My sheets won’t suffice your belly.
Cat has no logic,
Only fun.
——
i used to live with a rescue cat, i named him Bob; he was more interested in tearing my paper apart or sitting on my laptop to playing with his toy or sleeping on my bed 💝
Bob in his dream of being my boss 😁 back in 2010
may all beings be happy 🙏🏼
Today I saw magic
Warmly greeted my throbbing head.
“How deep is your love?” Said she.
“To whom?” Asked I.
“Does it matter?” Said she.
And so I was magically charmed
By these heart beats
Chanting a repeated naive rhyme
About how nice I’ve been breathing.
——
only those who know the death is just an inch away can do this wholeheartedly 💝
Without him I die
and with him’s no better
With or without him
longing’s the same
I found him, finding
what I hadn’t foreseen,
the cure and disease
as equal fevers
His silhouette flares
as we draw near
each other and
burns more proud
The deeper the harmony
the sharper the pain
Measure for measure
as decreed
——
The above is poem excerpted from below book — one that well explains how love consumes good soul. By simply loving life has shown what joy and pain can be perceived as either happiness or unhappiness depending on how deep or how true love is given meaning or taken for granted.
It has taken me quite long journey to finally connect the dots among the manifestation of love, pain, joy, harmony. It takes whole life to refine love and it takes big love to refine life — a vicious circle that keeps the fire burns, light flares and smoke billows bringing hope up to the sky.
“Life is light. Life is true.”
May all beings be happy.
♥️
Tarjuman Al-ashwaq (The Translator of Desires)
Buried memories
Sow the seed of forgiveness.
Time bends a straight branch.
——
I’ll love
No matter what
I’ll be over anyways.
I’ll work
No matter what
I’ll be over anyways.
There is me
Or not,
It might be the same.
Yet as long as there is me,
I’ll do what I can
To add more
Meanings
And
Utility
To my life.
I’ll love
No matter what
In life.
Life is good,
I won’t skip
A thank
And
Or
Cheers.
—
listen to love; it is everywhere 💕
All cuts and bruises
Paint a life of a blossom
Before it decays.
—
i was so young and innocent, a loved friend of many, a hated enemy of some — i was so much blessed 💝
life has brought me travel through labyrinth of life with traps and turns that cut and torture yet i am still a loved friend of many, a hated enemy of some — i am still so much blessed with cuts and bruises 💝 i’ve lost much but i find myself
no one shall erase this happy girl within — a blessed soul that travels through space and time 🙏🏼 thank you
Standing in front of you,
I see love.
It is clearly reflected—
A face of mine smiling at itself.
When you look at this mirror,
What do you see?
I wish you know
You are love reflected by a clear mirror.
I wish you see
This water clearly reflects you,
A love that exudes fragrance.
—-
a pond behind Himeji Castle 🏯 i could breathe drizzles and pine freshness while seeing a school of fish swimming in clear water reflecting acceptance
The longing has gone
Too far left by trueness.
No plate is prepared,
No wish is grown,
No intelligence is to decipher message
As heart is numb by laughter
And ridicule.
No number symbolises,
No alphabet pronounces,
All are faded away.
There’s only mine on its way.
Dandelion,
Bring it fly
To where it roots beauty,
Peace and eternity.
Only love remains
For the journey
That appreciates
Not a point
That fades away.
—-
i’ve met dandelions in many different spots; all of them are blooming new dreams, totally new, leaving the blur ones — prayer heard and soon coming true 💝
Every weekend
This heart multiplies.
They wander
Everywhere
Through music, pictures, poems and prayers
Sending peace
And love
That might not be
Returned.
What a sweet weekend!
—-
although you’ve targeted me with uncertainty, (pic: Banksy’s)
although you prefer war (pic: Banksy’s)
although you ignorantly hijack the love, (pic: Banksy’s)
sweet heart is still what you deserve,
no missile but beautiful heart should be sent to you (pic: Banksy’s)
freshened and showered with warm heart is your right
at the end a bunch of flowers will be thrown to you (pic: Banksy’s)
hahahaha…. i am always laughed by my best friends for constantly being “love sick” (pic: Banksy’s)
rike jokanan 
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