graphs of my Universe
Tears are footsteps
To friendship
Or
Away from it.
Tears of joy,
Tears of sadness,
Tears of letting go
Repeatedly
Until letting go
Becomes breathing.
female, young, kind, intelligent, high integrity, humorous , pretty! A loving wife, mother, friend 💕
Rest in peace, dear Laksmi 🌸
#utangrasa
Is there anyone
Before
&
After
Me
Leaving
Without permission?
None--
It is a consent that forms
Life,
A period where
You
&
I
Meet at a dot on a ring.
salam, dear shrine where heart and soul escort body to whisper all secrets
Kameyama Shrine
before cleaning – looked like birds loved to bathe and leave some feathers as token of gratitude
after cleaning – no one asked me to clean this, i just felt that i needed to give Japan a small token of gratitude and Kameyama Shrine be the one to receive it
always praying someday I can come back to that shrine. I will tell her that she did give me amazing vibe in my whole visit in Kameyama. Shrines, mosques, temples, churches and other places where human beings whisper their heart and soul out have always been a charm to me.
enso – there’s a dot where two extremes meet and form balance to ensure life flows
And at the vast water
Full of memories
I ask
What life does mean.
what life is without water?
what life is without stories?
I won't miss the train.
The last. A home is waiting
With a cup of tea.
i saw this scene very often from my room; last midnight was the most impressive when i felt so much love living as me with no one but me ❣️
Nature is a bunch of
Things brought in,
Or tons of things born with.
Know it within,
Acknowledge it without,
Life wouldn't be truer.
people bring in leaves and flowers to feel nature in the home, or simply because they acknowledge the similarity between the nature within and without
I wish you a fresh air
That brings coolness in a hot day,
And lullabies me in a cold night.
I wish you a unique vibe
That loves me romantically,
And beautifies yourself naively.
—
banana flower salad — fresh and beautiful
young rice ice cream only in autumn ☺️ — unique and cool
Cảm ơn, Hanoi 🙏🏼
This fool
Is learning
Through
Humming and
Walking with a friend and
Greeting fun adventures and
Kissing the flowers and the air.
Hello,
Fool.
Be sweet life!
—
one of my best friends is a prominent tarot master in Ubud, whose reading always reminds me that I am The Fool — thank you, De Nov ❣️
Losing is a sign,
A sign to either find,
Or let it go off the mind.
All is fine.
—
i lost my Airpod case with one earset in it; not panicky as losing or forgetting small things is my middle name — not in the bag, sure not at taxi as bag was never unzipped in the ride — i sent email to the hotel saying that my Airpod with one earset left was in the room — yes! it was found and safe kept — see you next month! 😂
Some people choose flowers,
Some ice cream,
Some either as the chair is the glazed pleasure,
Not what's before.
—
there is a chair behind flowers, there is a chair behind ice cream — which chair do you want to sit on?
In Javanese culture chair symbolizes status, authority, power.
The chair can also be compared with someone who gives one’s lap for sitting that symbolizes comfort, indulgence.
Seems like those two are different but both can give the same quality of life either positively or negatively.
When someone gives you comfort as if you are everything, yes you might be everything but that person at the same time is controling your status, your authority, control your power — making you a puppet graciously. Graciously at least, you said.
There is a Javanese adage “wong yen wis dipangku mesthi mati” that can mean “put someone on your lap and s/he will die”.
Pangku or pangkon is one device in Javanese script to “close”, to “kill” a “root consonant” at the end of a word. When an alphabet is followed by a pangkon device, it will turn to a closed consonant, a “dead” end.
pangkon: the Javanese alphabet that provides lap to a root consonant and closes or kills it 😍
e.g.: how “harusa”, “makana”, “minuma”, “bapaka”, “rudala” and “kusuta” are turned to “harus”, “makan”, “minum”, “bapak”, “rudal” and “kusut” by a indulging pangkon
Congratulations. You’ve got a chair. You’ve sat on a comfortable lap. You are the master of a universe. Yet remember, the chair can topple down, the lap is just a part of an individual who has mind– the master mind that governs you. You lose without truthfully winning. 💕
I see just a chair. With flowers. Or with ice cream. Or with both. Or without any. Both sweet through different senses, enticing for comfort. For just a glance. For just a sniff. For just a lick. For just a second. And then blended with a familiar taste name “just now”, a dead end before now.
A chair is a past tense adorned by a hope.
Dear, Life. Thanks much for the endless love. I need no chair except the mountain under the white cloud. I need no lap but breathing this fresh air. And how much ever I want someone or something, I will never take them from their chairs or their laps. Let them be empowered or expelled there — it is their best place. Be peaceful❣️
Let me be with those sitting on no chair but the lap of a naked soul. ❣️
Thank you, dear mother tongue. Even your Phonetics and Phonology bear insight and wisdom.
Thank you, my twisted-cum-twisting mind.
Coincidently waking up
With light breath
And open eyes
In a good morning
That calls for
Another day.
Some don't know the feel
And it's just a coincidence
For me?
How fair life is!
How unfair life is!
Be blessed, dear.
Be blessed everyday
With the blessings
That come from
Every other way.
—
That coincidence often comes as blessings might have been ingrained in me, even more.
One Coldplay-big-fan friend said to me some time ago “If you have spare ticket for Coldplay in Singapore, please sell it to me.” He really wanted to watch Coldplay in many different places. Seems to him Coldplay has brought in a lot of good meanings into his life. Not denying this possibility, I have to admit the lyrics are powerful for those wanting to look deep in to their own selves.
I said “I will but it is a very thin chance knowing this band has tremendously massive lovers.”
Sorry, friend….
Yet one fine day in January one good friend from Jakarta texted me asking if he can let me buy two Jan 30’s Coldplay show tickets as he was “suddenly” assigned for a biz trip and would not make it to be in Singapore for the show. What a blow! This friend and his wife would have met me before or after the show so I was kind of upset to hear the news. Yet at the same time I remembered that one friend would be super excited to buy the tickets.
What a coincidence!
Long story short the Coldplay-big-fan friend agreed to buy two. He wanted to watch with his friend this time.
Some time after he agreed, he texted me again saying that his friend could not fly in for the show. Honestly I felt it was another coincidence as I was also thinking of going again – I found listening to “Biutyful” live was addictive to me. So, I asked if it was ok for me to buy the other ticket: Coincidently he agreed; he must have really wanted to watch with his special friend yet he welcomed me nicely.
excited in my 3rd watch! more? no, no, it was the last for the “Music of The Spheres World Tour”, now time to enjoy them back in Apple Music 😃
So, this time we watched from above. A very stunning view with all the well-arranged illumination and performance.
Another coincidence. My friend and I didn’t say anything about which tee to wear yet both of us happened to wear the same one: Coldplay 2023 Tokyo special edition design. Wow!
We both went crazy blended with others who were as crazy as us. I don’t know when I will meet him again after the show but I truly thank him for giving me a lesson that someone can love something (in his case a band) that he is capable of explaining almost all fun facts about the band that I didn’t even think exist. Memorizing all songs’ lyrics, knowing albums and EP contents, and so on and so forth! Thank you, KM-san! God bless you. 🙏🏼
I asked him how he could memorise all lyrics. His answer was annoyingly true “If you love something, you will remember.” Damn! I just realized forgetful is my middle name especially when dealing with passwords and where I put small stuff. 😂
Jan 31 was another merry day. My niece watched with her best friend and they stayed overnight in my home after that. Her friend is a journalist who knows how to access “Kampung Badui Kanekes” that I have dreamed of visiting. To my excitement he agreed to escort me to visit the unique ethnic group in Banten anytime I want to go. ♥️
Should I underestimate a coincidence? Or, actually there is no that that we call coincidence. It is just a lesson that we never clearly see and (hopefully) later will be well learnt.
Thank You!!!!
among all this is my favourite photo – Angel Moon❣️ BIUTYFUL!!!
favourite of mine ♥️
To look you up
Like my breakfast's
Sunny side up.
—
did my best although my sunny side up is not round — i folded it 💕
Now here, Beloved
Is the best nowhere to go.
Breathing, close your eyes.
—
gethuk sukun with grated palm sugar 💕 for today’s breakfast! long weekend will be full of home cooking and some fun now and here
happy long weekend fully home…. no no fully home, maybe biking or walking too
waking up hungry, i went to kitchen this morning; re-steam the sukun then put one big slice in the mortar
yesterday aunty cleaning service knocked my door and showed me a big sukun (breasfruit) saying “Ma’am, would you mind cutting this into 2, one for me and and for you” — she promised me to give some sukun harvested from a tree at the green swimming pool; of course i did it happily! thank you very much, Aunty! 💕
i loved to eat it steamed or fried back home — can i grow it in my backyard? 😍
About sukun
A guest, Beloved:
Someone enjoying your home
Then a warm farewell
—
it’ was either me or my friend the guest here; yet we both enjoyed today’s dinner so much
How do you look, Love?
Are you as fierce as tigers?
Or as cute as cats?
—-
picture from Pinterest
selfie is a modern version of self portrait — we can be the best artist we’ve ever wanted and shown the world the best version of our interpretation of our appearance
I love selfie — it is a freedom to see myself, not always good yet that’s me 💕
i tried to paint a self portrait yet the result is sooo artistic that I can’t recognise my own self 😃 i have a friend who is painting not really nicely but able to capture the character of the subjects — i should practice more ♥️
I think one year is good enough to at least knowing how to capture the character, painting nicely is never my goal
goal: capture the tigerness in my catness and the vice versa ❣️😊
I'm a river
Forgotten when reaching the sea.
Nothing I can brag about this name.
I'm almost reaching estuary,
A transit for this memory.
I won't stop,
Home is soon to see.
—-
how great, how clear, how far the rivers can be; they will be forgotten once reaching the sea — union after separation
Picture borrowed from https://www.neefusa.org/story/water/what-estuary
Can you feel the excitement,
Dearest
Of a mochi maker
Imagining you chew what
He makes?
Mochi is
His masterpiece
Presented to life
Everyday
Through the excitement of
Your teeth!
Praise
Him.
The mochi maker
——
a ball of mochi that I skipped as I was too full after gobbling all other dishes — yet I didn’t forget to bless it and the maker
I don’t know who made the mochi yet they truly a group of human beings that amazed me with the softness and roundness of this mochi
see you again! 💕
The tree sows thousands of seeds
That fly to all directions
And never return
Until the wind stands up
And calls.
Which seeds come back?
Any
That hear a mother
Beautifully sings with love
Humbly whispers with peace
About home
Full of
Love.
——
this is how much beautifully humble my mother is — with that she has been highly respected by those surrounding her; I won’t be as respected as she is yet I want to at least preserve some part of her humbleness 💚
Everything is centred.
My mother.
Everything is meaningful.
My mother.
Everything is wisdom.
My mother.
——
she was meeting her doctor for medical review on her birthday today — she said her health and children are the best gift forever 💕
Ibu and me in Jabal Rahmah (Mount of Love), 2016 — wishing our love spread to everyone around us
a tumpeng by me for my mother, sent via WhatsApp 🙂
Time is
Paradoxical.
Luxury for those knowing how short it is,
Ordinary as everyone is given.
Time is
Relative.
Those transacting in life say
Time is money.
Those knowing its sharpness say
Time is like sword.
Those valuing milestones say
Let’s race with time.
Those mismanaging things say
I have no time.
Those loving you say
I have all time.
Those knowing your struggle say
Please take your time.
Those having super speed say
Don’t waste your time.
How do you say about
Your time?
You decide.
One to remember
There is no referee in life
To whom you can shout
“Timeout!”
Time flows.
Time flies.
Time walks.
Time runs.
Time swims.
Time dives.
You may want to stop it,
Yes you can
Only if you stop everything
At the same time for
Every body
Everywhere.
Can you?
——-
time is short when you smile and forever when you pout
Useful link about Time
Luxury, my love
What makes one feel fortunate,
Feel responsible.
Luxury, my love
Not brand, not price tag. It’s mind
Bursting new spirits.
Luxury, my love
You can bluff but you can’t trade
With a true spirit.
Luxury, my love
What you’ve failed, what you’ve too learnt
About the deep wounds.
——
not the Aman Jiwo Hotel making it luxurious, it is Borobudur temple, Menoreh Hill and all the Javanese villages and tradition conserved as surrounding is the real luxury
The bow that launches
Is the arrow that is shot:
An exhibit by the
One
That honour is inevitably
Gorgeous
For that
Respecting
From that
Witnessing.
Salute to the bowstring.
——
I have learnt how to genuinely respect my teachers and other human beings even more after learning meditation in Bali Usada — I humbly thank you, Pak Merta Ada. I bow to the divine in you and all my fellow Tapa Brata participants 🙏🏼
it was a sunny day so Pak Merta Ada invited us all to end the Tapa Brata with 1-hour meditation under the blessed bodhi tree — hope health and calmness be granted to all of us ♥️
Pak Ishak giving his testimony about the noble silence, Ibu Lady his wife video shooting him — the oldest participants in this Tapa Brata 2 we all cordially respect
canang under a tree as a daily respect to it for being part of the environment protection
torch ginger is the most grown herb in Bali Usada meditation center — yummy and fragrant when cooked
💚
Three of us stayed in bungalow #4 for 12 days of which in 1st-11th we didn’t talk to each other. We just took turn of using bathroom, switching on/off light at 3:30am and 10:00pm, making sure towel racks were sunbathed, replenishing toilet tissue, cleaning bathroom. All were done in silence in between meditation sessions, physical exercises, meals and lectures. Only at the last night after Tapa Brata was officially summed up, we could not stop sharing about our life journey until 2:00am.
Tami is 32, Fitri is 33 and I am 48: I am the oldest but I am the baby in meditation — they meditated 1.5 hours without changing position, I did but could not stop “ngereog” in the last 5 to 10 minutes.
My age doesn’t mean anything with these 2 ladies of harmonious mind.
See you again, my little sisters! Anicca! 💕
ngereog literally means performing reog dance; Tami used the word to describe someone’s intense movement during meditation due to muscle stress 😂
Ibu Lady, Srimurni and I showered by the morning light right after morning meditation and no shower (yet) — Srimurni was one of those could not stop talking to me after the Tapa Brata 😄
pure friendship is such a magical bond 💕
Once again
Is a bonus
Becoming allowance
As it is
Again and again.
I wish another
After another
Again
And again
Until it is
Time to end.
——
‘M 48th tomorrow. ‘Ve never thought I would reach this age.
When I was 9, I almost died. When I was 24, I almost died. I thought I would die at 44. It’s been huge blessings to be given another year.
another door before another door, 48 means a door to victory
My wish is simpler this year. After all failures and broken hearts, I wish for a warm home and a good job. Those two mean happiness to me. With a warm home, I can host my family and good friends. With a good job, I can leverage my role to help others around me improve their well being.
Amen.
Thank you!
There are steps prancing
On a line between two worlds
Within and without.
Lotus shows celebration,
Mud purification.
——
Twitter is getting louder and louder before election in Indonesia. Instagram is getting more and more showy with the holidays and parties coming.
I am happier not too much engaged with those two; Twitter is for me to keep abreast with political issues that help me make decision whom to vote in 2024 (I quit abstention this time after for the rest of my life) and Instagram is to tag and be tagged by family and friends. I am now even happier to have stopped stalking unnecessary accounts that made me scrolling and searching to gain nothing but sighs and shivers.
Only WordPress can hug me consistently warmly. Only WordPress can make me realise I have words to travel light, imagination to travel far, values and wisdom to travel with caution and good will to keep moving.
I am safe here.
💕
how warm and jazzy that place was; see you again, Jazz Gunung Bromo next year! I am happy to be part of your warmth and jazz! 🙏🏼
Only by being true,
I find heaven.
They said it is after life,
Yet it is here now
Every time I see
Those who are true to me.
Good morning,
Real Heaven.
——
good bye, dunia tipu-tipu forever 💕
The water
Flowing
With singing ripples
The air
Flowing
With whistling whispers
The wrong
Flowing
With whirling apologies
The right
Flowing
With blessing forgiveness
The heart
Flowing
With reciting verses
The soul
Flowing
With chanting gratitudes
The music
Flowing
With dancing life
——
they bought it from amazon for me and keep it for my next visit— my prayer is flowing with never-ending ありがとう！
A home is a breath
Haled in and out, slow and deep
Kindling sparks within.
——
Home is a house that I build very slowly with deep thought. The amount of energy put there is a number one priority about my future — I even pause almost all my personal travel plans this year in order to totally focus on this project full completion.
Bless me, dear Life.
Thank you!
💕
This is magnificent! So much money and thought must have been put to finally materialise this home. Very unique and serene! The “99 doors” must be symbolising the 99 attributes of God in Islam, the 99 names reflecting feminine and masculine qualities of God in the teaching. 🙏🏼
Do i wish to have this type of home? Javanese modern, yes but my home would be much smaller and humbler. 🙏🏼
The only resemblance of this one to my mini Javanese home is the wood that were bought from antique collectors, the greenery and the homey atmosphere. The rest is just two poles apart.
I am thankful to have a second home that shows the me in its character (my tiny home in Greater Jakarta is an industrial mass production that is definitely not me)
And I am charmed by the Javanese home belonging to Ms Farah.
Sunset,
When you greet,
You greet with messages
To see an end
As a start,
To see brightness
Wrapped in some dark,
To feel some doubt
As a protection.
Sunset,
Not long after you
I will sleep
To dream what I can’t achieve,
To release what I can’t detach,
To kiss my beloved,
To travel to where your sister
Sunrise gives back
All what rest.
——
today’s beautiful sunset 💕
pretty wind chime from Bogyoke Market, Myanmar that has been light and sound reflector since 2018 — thank you for today!
I first saw his works in Amsterdam and Paris in 2017 — stunning and extraordinary! So when “Van Gogh: The Immersive Experience” came to Singapore, I didn’t think twice to go.
While there was so much to enjoy, the huge room where people can just relax within the expo before continuing their look-around or after doing it was my favourite.
This video was of my first entry to the room. After enjoying the Van Gogh VR experience, I went back there to enjoy the time before finally left the expo: children playing, adults chatting, some sleeping, even a lady dancing. There was serenity in this dark room full of Van Gogh’s colours virtually projected to the walls by technology.
I am blessed to be there.
Thank you!
Salam.
🐣
Dress up,
Beloved
Even when you work remotely.
Dress up,
Beloved
Even when you’re alone in the cubicle.
Dress up,
Beloved
Even among the crowd; wave your hands with genuine smiles.
Dress up,
Beloved
Even if your style’s outlandish; be busy with how your story can go.
There’s sun spotting your colours.
There’s wind kissing your scent.
There’s moon drawing your silhouette.
There’re stars showering you with breathing confetti.
——
all my path is catwalk on which i walk presenting a designer’s masterpiece — no excuse of low performance, any chance to walk is to display the best of my designer’s pride
my style is work of art that might be differently interpreted and appreciated — it doesn’t matter, people see what they want to see and hear what they want to hear although they can’t lie to themselves
i love my style more and more everyday
♥️
With no white towel
I surrender
To the realm that hugs this heart.
I am water flowing
With no effort
To the ocean that waits for this mind.
How would this name
Say no to a call that sings love songs?
I submit everything
With a smile
And grace.
Body, mind, spirit and soul—
-
Jun 10, 2023
when the air taps my whole reality
with everything subtle and overwhelming
——
please excuse my strong arms 😀
after the Tapa Brata my classmates and I are still escorted to meditate everyday of 60 minutes for 90 days
it should be 36th day today but i only have 33 days in which i am able to do full meditation — in fact my doctor was quite surprised that unbelievable progress is indicated in better numbers from the laboratory test result after i meditate regularly — happy tears 🥹
my health is much better with calmness that is on track and harmonious thought that builds gradually
i’ve registered to next level Tapa Brata next Sep so i can get more benefits to help certain issues in this beloved aging body and to strengthen my mind
can’t wait to meet with the wise teachers who guide us and humble caretakers who help us with daily needs in Forest Island 🥰
i don’t know for sure what i can share from my achievement through meditation yet maybe someday i can help others reduce health complaints at low cost — i’ve always wanted to cure diseases with fragrance and herbs; my high intelligent friends said “pseudoscience, a crap wrapped in fancy paper”, i said “it doesn’t matter at least i can help them feel calmer and think positive”
all what happen in my life are like magic both the unexpected and expected — i hope my meditation brings more good magical celebrations to me and my beloved family and friends
and all…
May All Beings Be Happy
💕
rike jokanan 
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