Perfect Imperfection

Is life abundant?
She asked.
They said,
When you have everything.
She walked away,
There was never everything
In imperfection.

She says.
Life is generous.
They say,
Because you have everything.
She walks away,
There is never perfection
In everything.

Life is abundant,
She agrees.
They ask,
Do you have everything? You are not perfect.
She walks away,
There is always perfection
In anything imperfect.

—-

anger has long gone but sadness is still lingering like a hungry fox hunting a chicken 🙃 yet life is so generous to me offering sweet imperfection and simplest perfection that might be just a dream for those perfect perfection — so thank you as always! 💝

giving myself time and space to live again 💝

Interaction

Where is sun when sets?
Where is moon in the day light?
They share love through time.

Interaction is about reciprocity; even when we are alone, we are interacting with some tool of life or with the deep self within.

When it is not reciprocated, interaction is not genuinely true.

Salaam.

a grandma with her grandson

a mother with her son

family gathering

feeding two grandsons

let’s climb!

hi, dove! said the little boy

what’s in the water? said he

bubbles!!!

what is that over there? ahh hope! ☺️

am i your headache? no, you are my universe 😂

don’t move, just smile! someone is taking our picture ☺️

she is asking her cam to see what she sees 🙏🏼

our daughter is playing, i am sitting near her

hey! clear up! i am gonna land!

electrocution my a**! 😁

Choice

Choice’s falling star
Brightened in a quiet dark night,
Orbited to earth.

respecting this family for their choice of happiness, knowing that i will never be able to do so

inspiring me to at least enjoy simpler life and to accept all blessings more happily

Shadow

Is it the shadow
Or the real you show to me?
Distinguished beauty—

—-

i can’t remember which one is the shadow and which one is the real — i don’t want to observe further to find which is which

what i know the castle is beautiful day and night 💝

Bubble

A bubble’s bursting,
United with the free air.
Would you please join me?

Although Kyoto has a lot of impressive shrines, my favourite is not there. Mine is Izumo Taisha in Shimane prefecture about 343 km from Kyoto.

When visiting other shrines in Japan, I was so aware of being in Japan. In Izumo Taisha I got home: sunny, green, serene and unexplainably blissful. There were many visitors but my senses didn’t absorb their presence as if the hot air and bright light muffled their noise and wrapped me in a safe bubble bursting when my last step left the shrine front gate.

Romantic!

a long walk from the gate to the shrine — i remember it was a scorching hot day in August 2018 and i was humming while walking 😇

ablution, my daily ritual that i find also so soothing in Japan shrine especially in Izumo Taisha

torii 💝 a gate to the shrine yard

this is Izumo Taisha! 💝

shimenawa (sacred straw rope)

i only go to this coffee shop with my colleagues, but i wholeheartedly believed drinking Starbucks coffee was a nice thing; only in Izumo! right outside the shrine complex

Izumo Taisha, Shimane

Castle

Castles small or big
Stand on a hill among trees
Wave to the white clouds.

Matsue Castle, from afar (2018)

Matsue Castle, closer view (2018)

there is no reason to not thank life for making me me; with all the ups and downs, zig-zagging, winding roads, flood and quake, fake and genuine people around; i survive and become more and more relaxed — like Matsue Castle, my life is small, humble but strong enough and sweetly suitable for me 💝

Matsue Castle, Shimane

Castle

She builds a castle
Protecting and comforting.
Illuminated—

—-

Nagoya Castle under the moonlight (2014)

Nagoya Castle under the sunlight (2014)

wishing to explore another castle soon 💝

Nagoya Castle

White Is Enough

Last night
I dreamt
All white.
Today the dreams
Come true.

White is paper
On which I write,
With which I hope,
Through which I walk,
By which I am guided.

White is that
I trust,
Love,
Respect,
Witness.

I will be white
Even if it is broken.
Broken white—
That is more
Than just enough.

—-

Wear white and you’ll feel good!

💝

in outer from Hanoi; white is good even in the dark

in a white short-sleeve kebaya from Uluwatu Handmade Balinese Lace

parang in white from Batik Baronggung, Tulungagung, my mother’s town 💝

white linen is a simple comfort

white apparel makes me feel good 🥰 the white hair does too 🤩

feel good as good as white dreams flying to find their home 💝

Sun, Day

Hello, Sun
Today is your day.
Be bright.
Be warm.
Be nice to whomever is home.
Taste delicious.
Taste good.
Taste homy to whomever is lost.

—-

weekend is about waking up late with selfie 🥱

cooking whatever i want 😍

(re)watching movies while cooking — iPad is forced to perch on the plate rack 😁

Being Human

I thought I am kind
But no,
Dogs are kinder.
I thought I am strong
But no,
Dogs rock my heart.
I thought I am me
But not
Yet.
Dogs know who they are,
They live as dogs
As they are.
I live as what I want to be,
Even
When being inhumane human
Is what gives me benefits.

—-

watched this movie in today’s flight and cried — how dogs’ life is more genuine than mine🙏🏼

Haw! 💝

Butterfly

They’re flying
Around colours and shapes
In a garden
Where the gliding fragrance
And dripping nectars
Invite them
To celebrate
One phase
Before the next.

in Subak, Ubud wearing new clothes from Sukawati market (only for SGD30) and butterflies in my tummy 😁

Be Alive!

There are two children
Living in one life, playing,
Generating joy.

—-

never want to lose the child within — they’re the source of joy! 💝

Stationary

There’s a place in heart
Where things won’t be moved— stay still.
Hidden eyes know where.

a borrowed workstation today — oh, sambal super pedas! 🤩

a (rather) messy work station tonight before slumberland— oh! cable everywhere! 😇

Deeper and Deeper

I thought
I saw you
At the gate
But not.

I walked,
Am still walking
Deeper in
To a forest.

I thought
I would meet you
Somewhere
But not.

I saw you
Waving hand
To me
But not.

I run
To you,
You vanish
With a shadow.

I saw
Numbers around,
The shadow owns you
And brings you away.

I want to go back
To where I started;
But I am deeply lost
In a forest of you.

I stopped and saw a light.
I don’t chase anymore.
Too much hide and seek.
Too many games.

I look up,
I look in,
I look forward
To a love within.

i just want to sit down through this Ramadhan and find a string to tidy up all these scattered beads

About Time

Time is
Lightning striking
And that’s it.
A patch
Of burnt earth is
A trace
Of surprise.

When we meet
Someday,
Ignore the time.
Let’s count it
With heart beats
And senses
That touch.

Let me fall
In love with
You
Over and over again
As long as
Time
Can be defined.

is one chasing the other or the kite? it is love that makes both run and laugh, a kite that keeps the child within alive

picture from Pinterest

Blue

Blue is
Sky.
Blue is
Sea.
Blue is
You,
When smiling at me.

Blue is
Peaceful.
Blue is
Deep.
Blue is
Bruised by
You ignoring me.

Blue is
Seen.
Blue is
Felt.
Blue is
Angel you sent to me.

peaceful sky that lullabies — i slept almost the whole flight

i thought of changing to 44A but decided to keep 47A

…. only to find that my seat number is the number of gate we disembarked 🪶

i am superstitious 😂

Angel Number

Angel talks through signals
Differently read through places.
Some codes break others.

in Chinese number 4 sounds like death; but in another numerology version it is a symbol of solidity, stability and confidence

across the aisle is a marching 3 which is a powerful number, it symbolises communication, optimism and quest 😎

angel numbers are constantly around me so i never deny when they say to me “you’re always lucky!”

Bali, A Space In A Place

I don’t need a place.
They can build a palace
To place me.
I’m not a queen,
Please gift it to someone more beautiful and loving luxury.

I deserve just a space.
It can be a table for two
To chat with me.
I’m a traveler,
Please go on a quest with me through joy and challenges to be.

Let me clean my place
For a little space.
Now and here
With or without
You—

—-

i went melukat with one of my best friends in Pura Pacampuhan Sala on Saturday to welcome Seclusion Day and Ramadhan month — it was such a blessing for both of us

About MELUKAT

Linguistically melukat is derived from the old Javanese word “lukat” which means to “cleanse” or “purify”.

Melukat itself is understood as bathing or cleansing with water that aims to cleanse both body and mind, to refresh the spirit and dissolve away any negative influences. It is also believed to cure non medical diseases and sickness of the spirit and whether it does or not, a session bathing in holy waters will certainly make you feel good.

It is a symbol of letting go or releasing something burdening within us. It is a ritual that can be performed many times, in fact the more, the merrier as it can only lead to good things. It is also a kind of self purification that is very common by Indonesians of Hindu and Javanese Muslim in different ways as ritual.

Hindu in Bali will do it as frequent ritual, even for tourist attraction in some way.

Muslim have daily ablution (washing face/nostrils/earlobes/hands/feet) and mandatory bathing for women after menses or married couples after sexual intercourse. They also have another self purification affected by original Javanese tradition called “Adus Suran” or “taking a bath in Assyura/Suro month” in which they will do bathing in Javanese New Year’s Eve called “1st night of Suro”. Muslims are also suggested to do cleansing ritual (normal bathing with strong intension) before Ramadhan.

While in Bali why not I committed myself to self-purify? My best friend did it for Seclusion Day. I did for Ramadhan. Both of us did it for health, happiness and joy. 💝

Salaam.

walking along Sok Wayah’s rice field the whole morning on Sunday
after a long walk, Pukako’s drink and sweet potato is the best choice 😎

Dream Catchers

Catch my dreams, my love
The ones I could not.
Share the joy, my love
The one I would enjoy.
Let’s smile together
At the road we’ve taken.

You might have missed some dreams
Caught by your beloved around.
We’re dream catchers
Catching the ones
Delivered by the brightest fireflies.

Happy for good
Joyful forever.

i’d always wanted to be a journalist, i can’t for some reason — but she’s the one reaching my dream even much better 💝 god bless you, Dan! 😘

Describing You

You’re a fact
Just untouchable.

You exist
Just indescribable.

You’re not illusion
Just intangible.

You’re one
Just distracting.

You’re near
Just invisible.

You’re far
Just haunting.

You’re minute
Just blocking.

You seem nothing
Just enshrouding.

You’re everything
Just spacing.

You’re not a puzzle
Just enigmatic.

You make me think about you
Just to fail right through.

You’re clear
Just misunderstood.

You
Just
You.

you’re my needle in a haystack

Choice of Face

An artist opens her closet.
There are masks piling,
Waiting for the tasks.
One mask, one face
To make a day.

She stares and thinks
One face today
A genuine
A bright
A true
A nice—

A good day.

my watch face is Minnie Mouse almost everyday because she makes me a sweet cheerful cartoon! 💝

Numbers

I said to angels
Near me,”Tell my love there’s love
In your flapping wings”.

I was about to send some pictures containing angel numbers (twin/repeated numbers) to a friend who has been in love with especially 333, 3333, 33333 and all the repeated angel number 3 when realising that that friend was not in the list. Where was she? Maybe she unfollowed me? But why?

When checking in other friends’ lists this person was not there either, both in follower and following ones. Ahhh! Maybe she was deactivating herself?

As I don’t have her mobile number, I checked it with her best friend and he said “Yes, she has done it now and then. You don’t realise sometimes your list shortens? It might be her.”

Ahhh! Ok, ok…. 😊

She’s not lucky. The photos with her angel number are now for you all. 🙏🏼

Salaam.

33333
222

Lessons Learnt (sharing)

Lessons? Things unknown,
Still unknown, maybe won’t be,
Solved with acceptance—

Oftentimes people make the biggest mistake because they are young, because they are stupid or because they are not clear of what they aim at in life. At least that is what my core circle has agreed.

Many people reject to go for health check earlier only to find that they have really bad health problems too late to manage through life style change— too old or too weak and can only be managed through surgery and/or medication. This happens a lot around me. They would say “I am ok. I am healthy. No symptoms. It is just light headache. It is just small numb. It is just light coughing. It will get better soon. Blahblahblah.” And boom! Big troubles come (almost) late!

Do health check without waiting for intense symptoms. Don’t underestimate a pinch as it can be a punch.

Many people think buying property can be done at later age. They prefer buying cars, branded stuff, etc for the sake of high prestige. They would say “I want to enjoy my single life. I still can live with my parents. Why so hurry? My spouse will buy it for me later. Blahblablah.” And boom! Property price soars high in just some years and those branded stuff investment can’t cover the desired property.

Prioritise property (although at the same time some fancy stuff can’t wait). Of course this is not applicable to the haves who can buy whatever they want.

Certain people overshare for the sake of feeling guilty and trying to explain excessively. I am one of them— once tried to explain why and why just because I was afraid of being judged. And so I shared something that I promised to myself would keep it for VVIP circle of mine. And boom! The humiliation and disrespect that came back to me has made me feel like a biggest moron and worthless in the universe. It is taking time to accept the total stupidity about (blind) love.

Don’t overthink. Don’t overshare even with someone that you love the most if there is no clear foundation.

Aaaahhh!

Life is a school whose next classes can only be entered through a bunch of lessons learnt because of failures and wrong doings which look unforgivable but actually truly forgivable. 😘

There is no right or wrong. What is there is only acceptance and lessons learnt.

Salaam.

—-

make a beautiful string of beads from the lessons learnt; then life is counting wisdom 💝

Music

Close your eyes tight
If you hate to see me.
You will fall asleep
Peacefully.

Unlucky you,
Beloved.

You cannot block your ears
If you hate my music.
Your earbuds will amplify it
Loudly.

You will get used to it
And die while joyfully humming it.

My music,
My breathing
Will become your music,
Your breathing.

A
Heart
Beats—

inspired by QS 15:29

not everyone though

No Regret

One by one they fall,
Petals decompose to soil,
Fertilising life—

when i see more fine lines under my eyes, i feel blessed that i am alive up to this age; i wish to live longer with the same amount of love or even more 💝 there is no regret for all are signs and turns to the home 💝

The Mist That Is Erased

The green of beauty was there 
Until the mist slithers around
And hides what was seen.

Nature is a mystery
Unrolls its scroll slowly
As if not wanting to hurt
The hands with which it is held.

The mist though will be beautiful
Before it is kissed by warm air
That whispers a song singing
“Melt away. Morning thanks you. Day, noon, after and night truly love you.
If space unvoiced between trees scripting can’t connect the dots, only light can do.”

In no time the sun is rising,
Then the mist is missed.

That is how the story begins.

—-

Thanks, Michael for allowing me to repost this picture to illustrate my verses. God bless you.

A Journey into Mist 4

Emergency

Fly, leaf with the wind
Pushing you to where you go
For joy and safety.

near the wing, near the emergency exit — both safe area yet the most critical for action, while extremely sleepy; it doesn’t matter, the passenger (in mask) sitting next to me said “let me open it in case of emergency, you may sleep” — what a nice flight: sleeping in a calm flight, guarded by an unknown angel 🙏🏼

Time Is A Fortress

Time is a fortress
Protecting from memories
Of love that once bloomed.

i bought a rose to tell myself that some emotions will soon fade away like flowers that wither through time 🥀 especially with very slim memories in store 💝