graphs of my Universe
Flow, Beloved. Flow. Be a river whose stream knows Its gravity. Yours Is me? Making it flow back To where a home is. Within—
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A river is a river only when the stream is moving to a point of a pulling force. Don’t get stuck or blocked because that is when you lose your being as a river.
Find the tiniest gap and flow….
Urip iku sawang-sinawang is another Javanese wisdom that I’ve learnt. It simply means life is looking at each other, looking at something.
When feeling unfortunate, many will see others as luckier than them. Comparison is an immediate expression to show their frustration. Why are those people getting that but I’m not? Why does life give the blessings to them but not to me? Why are they married but I’m not? Why do they have good jobs but I don’t? Blahblahblah!
Let’s call them “these angry children”. When these angry children happen to consult to Javanese elderly, they will softly say “Ngger, urip kuwi mung sawang-sinawang….”
“Ngger” is equivalent with “My child”.
Many can only see what they are exposed to. Others have better job while these angry children don’t; and that makes these children angrier. They think that having particular jobs will make those people happier.
People are married and being married is considered happier and that makes these angry children sad or even angrier.
People travel to many places and these angry children think they are luckier; and that makes these children envy.
Some colleagues are able to deliver the speech better than these angry children and they think the colleagues perform better; and that makes these angry children feel as worst employees.
Are all those truly as these angry children think? No. Or at least not always. Or let’s say not exactly like what you expect. Or maybe not at all!
They have good jobs but they might have a lot of pressure or feel less appreciated. Whereas having (what you consider) less fortunate jobs is blessings for becoming less risky against integrity issues and less pressure.
They are married and these angry children never know what kind of spouse those people have. These children should be thankful for not being in a marriage this time and see that those married people are struggling financially or romantically or sexually or spiritually or socially or all…. Whereas the unmarried are free to be their own selves and getting more training from Life to be better and readier human beings.
People travel to many different countries while these angry children can only jump out to other districts in their province. These angry children think that makes those people better human beings. Yes, they have more photo albums and memories of what they have seen and more information; but they don’t automatically become wiser than whoever mostly stay home but are able to process the life experiences into true wisdom to address this humble life.
And colleagues speaking more sophisticatedly? Bloody hell! Those who talk talk, but not always walk the talk. What’s more important is how what aren’t even spoken or talked have helped people around them.
So, life is only how we are looking at each other, looking at something. We can look at them and get offended. We can look at them and digest what we see into a wisdom to be better living being without judging ourselves of being bad or unlucky.
That’s a simple Javanese philosophy that might be also taught in other cultures.
Accept who we are and process our own facts to mould the shape of love in us. Others are not always our mirror, they might be magnifying glass.
In fact, all of us deserve to be these angry children while growing to be the wise.
Thanks for the simple chats with some good friends and my own self.
Flower is blooming In a dry valley. No grudge— Just beauty and life
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Flower is everywhere as beauty is. Find it in you.
Beyond layered skies Is beauty unknown, my Love I’ll never give up.
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This I wishes happiness to that you across the ocean although the you never knows….
These two sisters are best friends. True friendship is precious and beautiful: relaxing, joking and teasing around, no prejudice, no pretension, agreement, disagreement, entertaining, no gaslighting, at the same time enlightening.
They talked about regret to let go, connection among all things, the death, relationship with parents and siblings, misunderstood religiosity, God’s love, being stupid, making mistakes and so on and so forth.
God bless these two sisters and true friendship on earth.
Is it love or pride To push through? Fortunately Engineerable—
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Some choose love over pride, some pride over love. No one can truly win over either because love and pride can be carved on to two faces of a coin. Ones need to toss the coin and get any appearance of one face not by luck. It is well designed, constructed and furnished.
How?
Culturally obviously….
True, Love. As long as you are being human, you can never absolutely win over one over another (the other?). It’s about how you grow through all dimensions in which you are: physically, mentally, spiritually, socially, economically, politically.
Accept it.
May all beings be happy.
Mount Bromo, where sun cheerfully rises
This silence is so eloquent, But still needs clarification. What did you just say? That love is blind? That love is dumb? That love is numb? What did you just say, Beloved? Silence weeps bitterly. Love is candid. Love is painful. Love is funny. Love is simple As simple as none.... Love is— Hush! Don’t trick me with words Or numbers. The beauty of silence shouts more loudly than what you’ve uttered. Bluff with verbs, not adjectives. Walking hand in hand is more beautiful than telling me beautiful. Not to be a grammarian, Beloved. Use the grammar well. Someday you’ll receive an unwritten book of love with which thousands of poems are softly breathed to survive this pain. Do you mind whispering an address, Beloved? This silence is dramatically eloquent but indeed much better than Korean drama.
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An old man’s waiting For the sun to rise. He moans At the moon. “Dark night, Pull away. You block me from Beauty.” — Life’s a mentalist.
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Who is the true beauty? The moon or the sun? Debatable! It’s a matter of played tricks of layered lights— light upon light with darkness in between. How would it be not cozy hiding under a cool calm night while patiently welcoming morning? How would it be not fun playing in a warm radiant day while cheerfully welcoming dusk?
Ah…. Why should one be getting old while constantly denying what is….
Salaam….
This love’s, Love never Dubious. It’s the window Clouded with questions.
Had a weekend call with one of my best friends and always ended up with haha hihi and hehe…. Joyful and fun! Yet love is always a-must topic. And today’s love’s topic was that it is never wrong —both the feeling and whom we love. It is questionable when we expect the same from those that we love.
Painful! Indeed. Like getting beaten by snow flakes in the coldest winter on the way to the warm summer. Whether you survive through the journey or you return to the previous path.
Let’s walk on!
May all beings be happy.
If eyes tell secrets, Yours? Fortress protecting town Full of histories—
Show me your naked eyes, Beloved where I can see the true you. Those sunglasses hide your most beautiful secrets.
May all beings be happy….
Name is a short spell. Not yours, Beloved. It’s mine Hanging in Heaven, Echoing after yours called. You can have it all.
How many names have you spelled in prayers? Are they the bold or the beautiful ones?
I call your name, Beloved ‘coz I know it infuses power into prayers like smoke of burnt incense billowing into the sky escorting dreams to meet the doors….
May all beings be happy….
Lammie, Khanyisa, It is the least I can do. Friends are forever When no discrimination. Can I do? Need a try, sure!
Animals have taught me a lot about many things. One of those is unconditional friendship. Lammie and Khanyisa are a sheep and an albino elephant calf who have been friends without asking why their tails are differently shaped and attached, why their hairs are of different colours, why their teeth are of different length…. Language, religion, nationalities, and so on are never problems. They just grass, rest, play together. What a beautiful world!
If you wanna support Lammie and Khanyisa’s unconditional friendship, you can buy a mug with picture of them printed on it. Mine arrived today through DHL, welcoming me at the front door. Happy yay!
Thanks, Lammie and Khanyisa and HERD! You’ve been much smarter than many of my human kind. I’m sending love to you and your family….. 😘😘😘
A brand new day’s come With the breeze through the windows; With the morning sun; With your shadow, Beloved Who dances through my heart beats.
To those who have lost the trust of love…. There is always a brand new day, a brand new way.
May all beings be happy….
Tuas, the end point Where the wheels will start gliding On the road to home....
I’ll start traveling again! I will go by taxi to the visited site and go home by bike! It is about 34 kilometers! Can’t wait for tomorrow!
I’m speaking with all exclamation marks! 😁 So excited!
None is forever. Hold the air. Thank the water. Greet the soil. Love’s now. Singapore - Feb. 1, 2021 / 00:23
Time flies in jet plane! Thought it would be forever to miss you but forever is so fast that suddenly February is here.
No Valentine’s Day this February as it means nothing. Valentine’s happens every second, forever….
May all beings be happy.
Showers of colours Splash cheery hello to time. I wish you warm heart.
Colours can bring certain vibes to a home. And so different colours of flowers create different atmosphere. Although not taking all for granted, I mostly check the meaning of flowers and wish that the supportive qualities symbolised by the flowers will be the energy filling the air.
May all beings be happy.
Seeing morning’s sun, Warmed by noon’s, serene through moon. Only where I am.
Ever thought that where you are is not the best place on earth? Change your mind soon!
I’ve always loved Asia especially South East Asia. People might think it’s because I’m now living in that place and never go anywhere else. Yes, that’s a primary reason but there are other reasons.
Long story short, I tried short stays in different places with different climates and culture and I conclude that where I am now is the best place: enough sun everyday, relatively same length between night and day the whole year. What’s more we can find friendly neighbours —in big cities people are less warm but relatively quite friendly, access to more vegetables and fruit, food is tastier with touch of herbs, more affordable living cost, and so on and so forth.
Last but not least in where I live spirituality is a daily life blended with nature— no I’m not talking about religion, institutional religion isn’t an interest of mine anymore. People don’t have to wait until certain days to pray, God or god is just a daily reality, sacred in the heart normal topic in public. People don’t have to organise registered charities to help others; not all people are trustworthy but I love in a circle where integrity is topmost criteria to survive. People don’t have to be certified to teach spirituality class; when I was young I simply knocked on neighbours’ doors and asked them about cultural and spiritual wisdom and we didn’t have to pay a cent.
Not ideal to all, but that’s a perfect life to this person
I’ve always dreamed to have a home base in culturally-integrated-not-so-crowded city like Bali, Yogyakarta or Ayutthaya when not traveling. It’s gonna be a sweet, warm landed property that once in a while welcomes family and friends to share ideas about this fun life and their great mind. Oh, don’t forget with lots of plants and at least two cats around! Dog? Maybe, the lazy one so that we don’t have to walk it everyday 😘
Dream on, dear Self. Hug the imagination while weekend is around. 😁
Don’t forget to wakey, wakey on weekdays! 😁
May all beings be happy.
Beloved is chased By many; loved secretly By the lonely. You?
Enjoy the weekend! 🤩
Hidden trough of Soul, A home where letter and voice Are silent. Where’s that? Walk your orbit, Beloved. They know the way to that realm.
You are not lost, Self. You are tracing back a journey home of trillions years of light and so you might have forgotten what, who and when but you won’t forget how to walk on it. What you need to do is just don’t quit. Don’t ask why, the answer is too clear. How ugly it is now, know that wings are grown.
Singapore – Jan. 13, 2021 / 19:00
Four-letter word, Love. I take love to deal with you. With full risk I know.
God talks about love. Religion talks about love. Many people refer to divinity and humanity.
Rumi talked about love. Ibn Arabi talked about love. People interpret their topic of love in wide spectrum: lustily physical, romantic, humanity, divinity — from the simple to the absurd. And it is always beautiful whatever the perspective is, as long as love becomes the foundation.
You can approach love from your own experience, the message is simply between Lover and Beloved. People may judge your message of love, but you are the truest judge to yourself….
From a seed of awe Grew secret admiration. Joy in painful hide Summed up by a flash farewell— I love you from where I am.
Love is actually personal experience that internally grows or flickers out based on the quality and responses. I find in my experience loving someone for many years without him knowing it until we took a farewell—he might only know he is special to me and not more; love grows but wisely stops expecting anything. Why expecting if you don’t even get the expected responses from the person and there is no entrance to learn more about the one that you love? Poor me? No, I’m lucky that love has tested me and I pass.
Yes, the most important thing is to test love, how true it is. What if your love isn’t intense anymore? How if the one you love doesn’t love you? How if you find your love evolves? All those rubbish absolutely happen. 😂
It is always good to talk about love. Love deserves a talk, in either low or high pitch, anger or soberness, silence or crowd, far or near, laze or excitement….
A bunch of roses Present flowers, leaves, stems, thorns— Where is the root, Love? It’s left in the heart, where growth Is truer and forever.
Yet for those who never contemplate or who don’t care, love is difficult to embrace and feel. The vibe can be so fake or vague without physical presence. They need definition of love, which can only degrade the quality of it. Just do….
What have I ranted about?
Too much for the last day of new year’s holiday but too good to be unsaid to start very good years ahead!
I send my best regards to you across the ocean. Happy and Healthy New Year! I love you from where I am.
May all beings be happy.
Singapore – January 4, 2021 – last day of holiday / 14:10
Rains talk about it: What is and is not; unique, Comprehensive Self. Woven with thousands of threads, Dyed in thousands of colours—
It’s about you, Beloved…. You that is understood and at the same time misunderstood….
May all beings be happy.
Language is alive Even in silence. I guess It’s ears who discount. I don’t escape, Beloved. Just my confidence collapsed.... Space is not distance, It’s a knot between two hearts. Imagine two words Without space: cramped and crowded. Just never disconnect, Love. Year end is ready To summarise lessons learnt To hand happiness Over to new one. Welcome, Self, to realm of connection....
Singapore – Dec. 30, 2020 / 00:10
Sometimes it’s the place,
Always the people. Stay put.
None beats inner peace.
…. and the eternal flame of Soul once again ignites the understanding that gratitude on what’s given is much bigger than what’s promised.
…. and you can never get rid of me
Forever….
God is love?
Dog is love!
May all beings be happy.
Don’t you see the leaping alphabets in every keyboard that you touch? That’s how many times I whisper your name, Love.
Don’t you hear the click of the second at the clock that you check now and then? That’s how often your name pops up in this mind, Love.
Don’t you smell the fragrance in every bite of apple you enjoy? That’s how intense the pain of remembering you, Love.
Don’t you taste the slight sour in every cup of coffee that you brew? That’s how I put a bit of you in all my prayer, Love.
Don’t you gently rub your temples of getting tired of thinking of routine puzzles? That’s how hard I think of you with thousands of failure, Love.
I doubt that you care the senses about me….
And you choose to travel afar, leaving traces of ignorance and mockery on me….
Go ahead, Love if that makes you find victory and create a crowd in your mind like a herd of elephants meet and greet happily….
Free verse from a singing heart of a Lover to the Beloved
You define sugar, I won’t. I prefer tasting All, and tell myself.
May all beings be happy.
Enjoy your weekend…. 💐
A bunch of roses, Send this prayer as a gift To those remembered Through air, land, water, fire in Dark, fragrant beauty. Amen.
I pray with flowers in a glass vase every week: reciting beautiful verses to those I’ve loved and remembered especially the ancestors, whispering unsaid love to those faraway, wishing they be happy everyday. Some people consider it ancient practice and not applicable or acceptable as modern but I feel more connected to my own self by doing it. So making it a habit
I love the dark mood of today’s flowers combined with my “sogan handmade batik”. It painted a shade of dark beauty with special fragrance and colour.
May all beings be happy.
You’re in the dark. Who? What? Matter? Not! It’s still you. Just some shade and light.
I’m never perfect, will never be as long as I live with and in this matter. There won’t be any absence of uncertainty. There is always a gap to bridge, a space in between, an emptiness after fulfilment…. Always between 0 and 1 – a binary system of wholeness I call it. Swinging like a pendulum from one point to another up to one extreme point before at the end of momentum thrown back to the next direction…..
Why would you stay in the day for 24 hours if you can stay cool in the dark for 12 hours after a long working day? Or the other way around with some reason?
Why would you mind missing someone for at least an hour a day if it can make this life more vibrant? Just don’t hate….
Why would you regret your broken heart as long as you don’t hurt anyone’s pride? Just don’t forget to love yourself….
No matter what and who you are some time of and in your life, you’re still you. Be you! Be more whole you every time…. A true you
May all beings be happy.
Mr Squyrrell came, Winked then said “Loved by nature”. She asked “yours or mine?”
Up to us to think of “loved by Nature” or “loved by nature”; maybe it’s everybody’s
May all beings be happy.
Lil knoz ‘bout a gal Bikin’ crashin’ co’nut tree Laughed and helped at once
Remembering what you did in childhood is like watching cartoon movies, entertaining and energizing. How painfully the bad time was brought to you, when recalled, it brings a good smile back to your face.
When I was a girl, I loved riding bike. Often time racing with no one just with my beloved red one, enjoying the wind as if I was the queen of the road. Old people knew I was one of the careless.
One day I took off hands from the handlebars to clap hands singing along. Stupidly… No… Excitedly! Thought I was good enough as a bike rider. So, the wind took control of the bike in high speed as we were sliding from a sloping edge. We crashed into a coconut tree in front of neighbour’s house. It was my first bloody accident in life and not the last for sure 😊 I was lucky to live in a community who believed that children of the neighbourhood were the responsibility of all…
By then bike and I always met our rescuers. Now I won’t, so I ride bike wisely…. 😁 So far only one mudguard wheel was gone because of one silly accident —an irresponsible electric scooter didn’t want to slow down and forced me to get stuck to the side of the bike way pushed us to a tree. Hope no accident anymore 👍🏽
Nothing happens for no reason. Always be happy how much ever life sprinkles bitter to your plate. Hope all become good memories when we see it from later time.
May all beings be happy.
What about flowers? Colours, fragrance, shapes, and mood Wrapped in a prayer.
Singapore – November 20, 2020 / 00:10
rike jokanan 
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