Wasted, Beloved,
None. In life allโs by design
With scales and measures.
โ
Good morning, Saturday. Thanks for opening the weekend gate. Iโm flying back home soon; canโt wait for the sweet surprises!
Salaam. ๐๐ผ
Wasted
Tag: haiku
Feel Good
Feel good, Beloved,
No matter what. Stars still shine.
Moon and earth still spin.
—
Why are you nervous, my dear? Romance is within reach, just between breathing in and breathing out. Stars, moon and earth give you so much attention while you are ignoring them. They have done their jobs; you should do yours if you think it feels good.
May all beings be happy.
Salaam. ๐
Playful Not Player
Playful is the sun,
Gazing, not a player though.
The earth is smiling.
โ
This worldly life is no more than play and amusement, no doubt; yet some situations are seriously needing โhandle with careโ. And so I believe feeling good no matter what is the best way to respond to whatโs given. It is time to be playful.
This worldly life will not make this physical body live forever; yet there is part of me living forever and ever dwelling broader higher deeper dimensions. I wish to meet loved ones in a more meaningful and joyful state. It is not time to play around.
May all beings be happy. ๐
White Hair
White hair, Beloved,
Waves through the wind of white sword
Waved by white wizard.
โ
In white hair, will I be as strong as Gandalf?
A Guest
A guest, Beloved,
Makes host happy yet confused.
Smile sweet and thank, too.
โ
Iโve met hosts with different types of personality or characteristics. When the host is a person, itโs just about that particular person. When the host is a company, it shows me the company culture or local culture.
Iโve got a few โcuteโ treatment from some hosts.
One company in Koka was informed that Iโm a Muslim. My colleague told them โRike eats halal, please find the food source from now.โ They didnโt clarify to me and just followed that pranking colleague blindly. And in my 3-day visit they fed me halal food they ordered online and had to be delivered long trip to that remote area.
โIs it good, Rike-san?โ The host asked me on the last day.
โDo you expect honest or polite answer?โ said I laughing.
โBe honest please ha haโฆโ
โI tried NN-sanโs food from your canteen. I love your food much much better. This online food tasted good but didnโt taste fresh.โ It was impolite like hell for most Japanese host I guess. ๐
โOur canteen food is not halal. Iโm sorry about the online food.โ He must have wanted to commit suicide after that. ๐
Then I started preaching what halal meant to me. And they said they would not order the halal food for me anymore and give me their canteen food the following years. ๐
โ
The second was one company knowing Iโm a Muslim as informed by the branch in Malaysia. So they knew I pray although they never knew I only pray when wanting to.
So they brought me to a small room to do afternoon prayer. I asked if they have Muslim employees so they had the room, they said it was prepared for me. They moved out table, chairs and other cultural ornaments. ๐๐ปโโ๏ธ
The first day I prayed, the other days they asked if I would pray. I said no. Then again I preached what type of Muslim I was and they nodded heads looking confusedโ they might think how would a human being can be this obedient yet disobedient to her God.
โ
The third is also about being a Muslim. I came with 6 other people for 2 days and the company gave me fruit salad while giving nice beef/chicken/pork, egg, vegetable, rice lunch to others. They said they only had salad as halal food and no restaurant near the industrial area cooks halal and non halal food separately.
My colleagues explained that I could eat this and that but โnot pork onlyโ. So the next day they provided my favourite Vietnam spring roll with โvegetable and porkโ not โpork onlyโ. I left the lunch box untouched and went back to the yummy salad. Iโll come back next year, please give me pho. ๐
โ
Some people are so naive not knowing what to do and deciding to do their bestest best to respect the guests. God bless them.
I enjoy being a (not so good) Muslim. Misunderstood but still well treated by those willing to respect others. God bless you! ๐
Salaamโฆ.
Sweet Surprise
Unforeseen, unplannedโ
Lifeโs rich: men, events, chances
Bring moments of truth.
โ
This evening I met up with two Saigonese friendsโ not planned, not predicted. We sent each other messages and found that we three were in Hanoi and decided to have dinner together.
His message to me: โIโll pick you up once youโre preparedโ. Her message to me: โLet me know when you arrive at hotel, Iโll kidnap youโ. And they both came in the same taxi with different intension. ๐
For years we have always wanted to meet in Ho Chi Minh City to eat south pho bo and life preferred pulling us together in Hanoi for north pho bo.
A happy rendezvous! All was good. The only minus was that I had much noodle as part of dinner. ๐ See you in HCMC!
I hope to get other sweet surprises. Or at least I commit to feel good no matter what so any surprises will be sweet.
Salaam.
Romance
Romance, Beloved,
Turns her into a dreamer
Of a slow dinner.
โ
Todayโs dinner is the longest ever I have alone: sitting in the restaurant for almost one hour not only to eat but also to enjoy a sight of two old-aged lovers enjoying dinner at a table across mine. There was no obsession of showy loving, no romantically staring each other, no hand holding, only picking food from the shared menu on a plate and a bowl s-l-o-w-l-y almost meditatively โ Hmmm I mean I still dream of doing the young romance but at their age all lovers will have become โprivate life historiansโ wanting to recount memories alone in the crowd. ๐
They spoke Vietnamese so I (almost) whispered to a waitress serving both of our tables to translate a chunk of the chat we both eavesdropped. A couple of hackers of very ordinary topics! ๐
When I left the table (they were having a shared plate of dessert s-l-o-w-l-y), I smiled and waved my hand to the lady. She smiled and waved to me, too. Silently I sent my prayer gift for their health and happiness.
I think my dinner was more romantic than theirs. What a beautiful evening!
Wakey, wakey!
Time to prepare tomorrowโs work! โบ๏ธ
Salaam.
Sweet
Sweet heart, Beloved,
Welcomes each day with sweetness
Flavouring whatโs not.
โ
Sweet heart can belong to a sweetheart or to anyone whose heart contains sweet things. Sugar daddy and sugar mommy not includedโ โบ๏ธ
Breathing
Breathing, Beloved,
Dive with it slowly, knowing
It can blaze and burn.
โ
So much swarmed in mind today. This brain was so busy processing unclear things that it could not process what truly happened within. All dots of thoughts felt like molecules bumping with and crashing each other in Brownian motion. The internal Brownian motion expanded externally and bad mood caused physical discomfort.
For around 12 hours the bad mood and physical discomfort was densely lingering. Reading, cooking, eating, drawing, writing, washing, watching YouTube, listening music, checking suitcase for next trip, taking shower, even sleeping didnโt help stabilise the emotion. Alamak I didnโt understand what was going on.
At dusk time I took a seat in one bedroom corner, closed eyes and paid attention to breathing. Very fastโ it was not my normal breathing speed. Then trapped emotions were found: unexplainable insecurity and anger. After around 30 minutes normalising my breathing speed, the bad mood was totally gone.
Iโm sorry for ignoring you, breathing. It canโt be denied that my physical has given me signs of what happened inside. This physical has always reminded me about what emotions are dominating. The dominating emotion indicates what energy is attracted โ positive or negative. Donโt ignore signs given by body; not even once!
Lesson learnt: Some dominating stuffs donโt deserve priority. Severe weather, bitter messages, false news โeven if affecting meโ deserve to be smacked down! Donโt try me, bitch(es)! ๐
New week is gonna be nice! ๐ค
Alfatihah.
Mood
Bad mood is hunger
Draining mind and tainting heart.
Can food heal the pain?
โ
Certain type of bad mood doesnโt go away easily. It can sit silently consuming emotion for almost 12 hours. Some can be cured with food, some canโt. We still need food anyway.
Unfortunately no one is responsible as the cause, it popped out just like that with the falling rain; yet the self is responsible to get through it patiently.
๐
both birds and humans love it
Gifts to You
These gifts, Beloved,
Peace and love hummed to loved ones
Living here and thereโ
โ
One of the Javanese and Islamic teachings that I will never leave for the rest of my life is sending gift of prayer containing peace and love to my loved ones wherever they are, whether they are physically wandering on earth or spiritually gathering around life.
I believe that my passing-away ancestors are living in different levels of consciousness (call it hell, heaven or somewhere in between up to your liking) and they are watching their offsprings without being able to directly communicating with us. They deserve my gift as they have been my line to get the chance to be here now. They deserve peace and love as they have done the best they could to draw a meaningful family tree. Yes, some might have made silly mistakes but hey thatโs what Buddhism calls โkarmaโ. Yes, some might have caused shameful stains on the family picture but hey thatโs what Islam calls โalam syahadahโ. Whoever and whatever they were, all of my ancestors deserve good wishes sung to them.
I also wish peace and love to those I love still breathing the air. Wishing all of them health and happiness. ๐
We Javanese Muslim will send gift by reciting some Javanese prayer closed with Alfatihah, a short chapter in the Quran containing peace, love, praise, forgiving, protection and guidance. A basket of beautiful wishesโ
How light this heart is to be sure that all whom I love are well.
Alfatihah to all whom I love. Youโre loved. Youโre blessed. Donโt shop too much. ๐
Happy weekend!
Pleasure
Pleasure, Beloved,
Sweet moment under the rainโ
Sunshine is peeping.
โ
Todayโs biking started at 6:30am and ended at 7:15am as the rain began earlier – weather forecast reported rain would fall at around 8am. We decided to fold the bikes in my home then drive to โKueh & Meeโ for breakfast.
Conversation is never boring with this good friend. Any topics about her children are my favourite as those children give me inspiration to be always young in heart how old ever I am and optimistic about life how much low my mental is. Topic about her wanting to go back to work is never nice because thatโs when she questions if she is capable of doing this or that; while she is one of intelligent friends I have โ- she is an excellent chemist who lets her expertise hibernate and allows her husband to lead a brilliant professional success.
After todayโs chatty laughing breakfast, she went home then picked up her husband in Changi Airport, arriving from a biz trip. A long list of tasks were still waiting for her, making me lose reasons to complain about life.
She is one of my favourite people inspiring me with their being ordinary the way they are.
Thank you, Mbak Eva! God bless you. ๐ฅฐ
Heart
Warm heart, Beloved,
Where flowers bloom in hot day,
Roots enjoy divingโ
โ
I cooked cow heart for lunch. The taste of the heart was more special than before. Perhaps it was because I hadnโt eaten cow heart for more than 2 years. Or the heart was owned by a kind cow. ๐
The dish reminded me of a joke among my circle.
A: Why donโt you eat beef?
B: How would you eat that whose eyes are so beautiful. They must have good heart!
A: But why do you pork?
B: &@$@?! Why donโt you eat pork?
A: How would you eat that whose look is so cute like Ms Piggy. Their heart must be romantic!
Weekend is almost here! Letโs enjoy it with warm heart!
๐
Guessing
Guessing, Beloved,
The least inaccurate points
Of mangosteen seedsโ
โ
Thatโs what we call โtebak buah manggisโ, guessing game to decide whether the number of sections at the bottom of the fruit accurately matches the number of seeds inside. Mostly matching, yet this time it is not! ๐ Life is sometimes unpredictable even with good database; anomaly is a rule whose patterns are not yet formulatable oops formulated by human beings โ please excuse my English, Iโm not a native. ๐
Like someone we love. We thought they are 6, in fact they are 5.
Fair enough to say: seldom expect accuracy in estimation; better be sufficiently into the least inaccuracy so it wonโt drop one down to abyss when finding inaccurate things. Iโm trying to be wise as myself for myself about myself. ๐ฅฐ
Oh dear, mangosteens!
Thank You
Thank you, Beloved.
Clouds and rains carry the signs.
Earth decipher them.
โ
Not About Others
It is about me
Myself, not about others.
Jump. Spread these wings. Fly.
โ
Moses and The Shepherd
In you, Beloved,
Thereโs Moses and The Shepherd.
Transfigurationโ
โ
Like it or not, both are within.
Salaam.
๐ค
๐คฉ
๐
Payday
Payday, Beloved,
Crossroads to 4 directionsโ
6 oโclock, good bye!
โ
Ah yes! Iโve been paid with how a group of people feel proud of achieving what they thought would never happen for my persistence and never-ending-annoying questions and reminders. Iโve been paid with sweet smiles for greeting the cleaning ladies and security guards and colleagues and neighbours. Iโve been paid with my family and friendsโ laughter for the jokes that were not even funny. Iโve been paid with my colleaguesโ flooding emoji for my โdrunkenโ fingers sending auto-correct silliness. Iโve been paid by many many of those Iโve never thought of making me so light hearted more than dollars and cents.
Hey! Donโt get me wrong! Iโve also been paid with bitter rejections and secret smirks for what I did wrongLY and/or I did inappropriateLY.
And hey! Iโve also been actually paid with wages and benefits for working in a company.
Everything is worth paying and everyday is a payday.
Never look back to what was wrongly spent, thatโs my payday commitment!
Ah how I love my payday!
Of course! Whoโs not?
May all beings be happy.
Good Words
Good words, Beloved,
Postcard sent in holiday
Showing what oneโs seen.
—
My motherโs question after saying hello at lunch time is always โWhat did you cook today?โ And sheโll say โDelicious!โ when I send the food picture although she might say differently when tasting it. Both are happy, and thatโs the most important thing.
May all beings be happy.
Weekend
Weekend? Relaxing, cooking, laundry, house-cleaning. Rain makes it cool! Sweet!
โ
Lazed Days
Lazed two, Beloved,
Wrapping up five passing by;
Seven in a packโ
โ
Always ready to work, always ready to rest ๐
๏ฟผ
Idyll
Idyll, Beloved,
Found in rural area;
Hidden heritageโ
โ
Saw a package in front of my door today. It had been there for several days as instructed to the courier while I was away for a biz trip. Three pieces of jarik batik (long fabric with traditional batik patterns) from Yogyakarta were delivered safe and sound.
Idyllic gift for myself for the hard work in the past one year. Thank you, dear self! ๐
Truntum (depiction of thousands of jasmine flowers) symbolises life under divine guidance and peaceful life fragrant like jasmine. Sido asih symbolises living in love and compassion.
While sido asih pattern bears common symbols everywhere in Java island, the color and the strokes show its place of origin. Black and thin lining is originated from Solo, white and bold lining is originated from Yogyakarta.
Nitik (literally means making dots/points) is an original batik pattern in Bantul district, Yogyakarta. Nitik โcakar ayamโ (literally means chicken claw) symbolises someone who is good at providing good life for his/her family (hard working, prosper and wise).
Two-sided batik is such a luxury to have in modern day. It doesnโt always show the price; but it is more about the maker has to block both sides of the fabric and it doubles the time of craftsmanship. Most batik is one-sided nowadays.
Canโt wait to directly thank the batik makers for their love to Javanese culture.
Matur sembah nuwun, Mbah. Mugi penjenengan dipunbarokahi dyaning Gusti Allah Kang Maha Agung. ๐๐ผ๐
Alfatihah
A Bridge
A bridge, Beloved,
Transitioning melody
Between two islandsโ
โ
It takes logical thinking to bridge the gaps โ where she is, where she wants to be. And, honesty is the right logic to know how to get from one state to another.
?
Can anyone be dishonest to oneโs self? Yes? How long? Long enough to sink before reaching the destination.
May all beings be happy.
Playground
Playground, Beloved,
Where crickets find the shelters,
Light heart run aroundโ
โ
Back to my playground โ am I the crickets hiding from the stomping feet of the children playing? Or the the light-hearted children stomping their feet around?
Comfort comes in different ways to different people.
May all beings be happy.
Rampant
Rampant, Beloved,
Sambac grows after the rain.
Sweet fragrance breezes.
โ
Feeling
Feeling, Beloved,
Sparks from a crater deep down
Show that itโs alive-
โ
Listen
It rings, Beloved,
Sweeping doubts, blooming glory.
The white loud whisperโ
โ
Prime Time
Prime time, Beloved,
The best time to bloom or dry.
Not her decisionโ
โ
David and Goliath were enough lesson to learn that prime time isnโt always at oneโs physical prime.
May all beings be happy
๐
Falling Stars
Middle sphere burns up
Rocks and debris falling fast.
Beautiful hazardsโ
โ
Wisdom seeds start as humanโs observation evaluated then get compiled as natural science then grow as knowledge then ripen as insight before finally be harvested as fruit called wisdom.
If she misses the points of natural phenomenon, she misses the point about her own self. And thatโs almost everyday, missing many many points.
Read! Wisdom is scripted everywhere. Laugh! Her reading though is not always right. ๐
May all beings be happy.
Prime Crime
Partners in crime, Love
Sail from torii to torii.
A ship of good friendsโ
โ
rike jokanan 
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