Yellow lucky leaves Pop up unexpectedly. Answers to wishes.
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Dream come true is not always with work only. It might be with some enchanted wishes, self encouragement, ranting when upset, sleeping when tired and beloved onesβ prayer β all acting as the x factor. In a package those can be summed up as human being determination.
Ignore those demotivating and/or disrespecting. They try to distract, but let them be out of the equation for a while. Just blow them a kiss. π
Weekend is a bridge between two islands. Walk on it slowly with a smile. Donβt forget to hum love songs. π
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never found in my attempt to get a clover pendant to bring my birthday annual staycation wish come true; a pair of clover studs greeted me in Bangkok yesterday – wonβt let a chance be a waste π i feel lucky most of the time – thank you!
The room becomes bright With two smiles under dim light. Feel good with good sight.
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I met a good friend and he could not stop talking about how hard it has been for him to feel good behind his (nice) smile. He said that he is constantly in stress of silent competition at work or in loneliness far away from family. He said that people around him seem unhappy to see others happy.
Me: Normal! It happened to me when I was young. Getting older, it is easier to accept what is.
GF: You did compete? Unbelievable! You seem to have neither ambition to excel nor spirit to live. Low profile, high product yuck! Your motto sucks!
Me: I did lightly. Youβre still young so just enjoy your competitiveness and being away from family. Make more friends and only one girlfriend. Some day you will be where I am now when nothing is worth chasing except cockroach to kill.
GF: So you feel good all the time?
Me: Most of the time only, not all the time lah⦠I am not a Barbie doll.
GF: Meaning you never have problem?
Me: Do I look like not having problem?
GF: I know you have problems and are sometimes upset about people.
Me: Ya, I do have problems. People confront me. I confront people. But I minimise blaming others. Most thing if not everything is about me making incorrect decisions. I am sometimes very very unhappy about others, too. I act boldly occasionally to show boundary.
GF: And you still can feel good when you are not happy?
feel good is contagious
Me: Yes, I have a lot of distractions ready: work, books, orchids, painting, people although mostly not them, biking, cooking. End the unhappy time fast.
GF: How?
Me: Distract yourself. Flip the coin to the other side. And remember feel good is contagious. At least you donβt look gloomy when you feel good.
GF: So how do you think I should feel good when my colleague stabs me in the back?
Me: Feel good that it is not you stabbing people in their back. Thank God for showing the real friends to you.
GF: Argh! I want to punch his face!
Me: Ouch! Will it make you feel good?
GF: Maybe, but makes me look not good, then makes me feel not good.
Me: Wow! You master it already!
GF: But donβt you realise some people will get offended even when we feel good and do things as we are? They think we are insensitive. They think we are ridiculing them.
Me: Why care? You only need your approval to do something that makes you feel good, with one condition: that you do it without intension of offending or hurting others.
GF: Agree. So is it because you are not able to appreciate the food? And how do you minimise blaming others in this case?
Me: Of course I blame the chef! You think I am his mother? Letβs not be back to this restaurant again.
GF: πππ
Lessons learnt: stay away from chatty friends when hungry, be relaxed when talking to young men as they explode easily, find a good restaurant or cook your own tom yum, get older without grudge, avoid those disrespecting you, laugh joyfully
Floods come with big rain, Worsened by the blocked drainage. Leaving mud story
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A big flood happened in Jakarta in Feb 2007. It trapped many people in the buildings for almost the whole day (even longer in some area) or inside cars for at least 6 hours (even more in some location). Those in the office just stayed in the office. We on the road moved inch by inch as only narrow part of the road was βsafeβ from water β no, no, not dry at all; it was standing water almost like ripply shallow ocean.
The cause of flood in Jakarta is the extremely heavy rain plus bad drainage system in Greater Jakarta.
I was on the road back in 2007 flood day for 8 hours feeling stuck: no food or drink, no toilet (the worst of all the experiences), with random collection of songs played in a music player low bat before even I reached half of a normal journey home.
It was only one day or two of misery; the next year we all laughed at each otherβs story. A friend who peed in to a bottle in the car. A friend who decided to leave his car on the road and went home on foot finding the car moving far away from where it was left the next day. Some friends who cried afraid of losing chance to meet the family but the family especially children thought that flood was fun time. Many friends whose floors and walls were messily coated with mud mixed with rubbish and creepy crawly after the flood and they found stuff that were lost for years through cleaning the mud.
Weβve learnt the lessons yet it takes time to fix such a systemic issue. Jakarta, you can!
Iβve learnt my lesson too that tragedy + time = comedy. A simple equation without unknown factor except how much time is stretched. God speed!
Salaam.
from this
to this
also this and moreβ¦.
simple equation, just 9 no complicated combination
Midnight is calling With blaring sound in the aisle. Desperate loversβ
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Suddenly very loud voice of (maybe) two lovers walking down the aisle outside the hotel room laughing interrupted my sleep, and so interrupted my nightmare. Thank you and at the same time damn you!
Beloved, please send me back to slumberland again. π
people say love is the answer but to me it is of too many unknown factors and elevations; too many assumptions and prejudices; why donβt people just say NO much earlier instead of vaguely communicating through codes and misleading messages – be free, desperate lovers, I am irrelevant to you
I just need a simple equation where only one unknown factor needs solution; this is my compatibility definition: simplicity, sincerity and trust; you are too good to be true; if you agree, set me free
Blessing is a swan Walking, swimming and flying Around garden lake.
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when I was a girl, I wanted to be a flight attendant traveling around; thanks God I donβt deserve to be so I can be a passenger traveling to accompany them π₯°
A line of this heart remembers Whatβs not even in memories. Flowing clean river hidden in the skyβ The other line of this heart remembers Only whatβs imprinted through relations. Murky pool standing around the earthβ
Donβt have the right to be missed With these limited memories. This sky is hidden by the cloudβ Donβt have the right to be remembered With absence of relations. This earth is full of locked doors.
Can only miss whatβs not imprinted. Can only remember whatβs hidden. Still beautiful Still amazing Yet hidden Yet secretive Circled around between hearts That read whatβs not inky written.
Thereβs an end To a dream. Itβs when coming true Or coming dead. And thatβs the light at the end of a tunnel Of light Of wide spectrum In which weβre prancing.
Choose your colour.
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you donβt remember me, I do; you donβt see me, I do; you donβt hear me, I do; you donβt smell me, I do; you donβt taste me, I do; you donβt touch me, I do β when you close the door, I stay yet Iβm blocked from you π
Ocean welcomes all, River flown and rain fallen. Friends in a friendshipβ
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A meet up with my first mentor training me in my current profession almost 20 years ago. He and his wife are in Singapore to celebrate their 10th wedding anniversary and spend this whole day to meet up with me: shopping in Orchard Road Apple Store, browsing around looking for my favourite Japanese restaurant that was found closed down since 2021, having lunch (Indonesian food in Singaporeβ¦.? Oh my) walking around Orchard Road, taking MRT for fun, enjoying evening coffee in Starbucks Bugis Junction before our farewell.
This wise couple gave me a bunch of advices to be this and to be thatβ¦. How lovely this life is to have friends who are willing to share their (personal) experiences for precious lesson learning.
Thank you, Pak Donny and Mbak Maya. See you in Jakarta! πππ½
Alfatihah to my dear friends.
three mugs, different content, enjoyed from the same table
Thereβs only one way to leave a forest: its edge. Throw away the doubt.
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life is too precious to play complicated games; take away unknown factors from the equation and find a home π₯°
Yogyakarta, a place I dream of being a home when all these muscles give up the hardship – maybe yes maybe no, my bothers said; I said again βat least I know it is now my homeβ
Not answered questions: Those to be pinned with meanings By them questioningβ
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Surabaya did sum up my medium-length end-of-year holiday of mine. Hosted by one best friend, this 32-hour visit meant much to me: a lot of chat and enough food.
With this best friend open discussion is a routine. Last nightβs discussion while driving around the city was everything about money. We both treat money differently. She is a better financial planner, I am a learner.
We used to be curious about what money truly was. Money discussion had always been a hot topic before and last night we both finally agreed that money can be defined as anything according to the one managing it.
We know different types of friends and their behaviour towards money. There are friends who meticulously count money (stingy), friends who think money is a symbol of welfare (social status), friends who consider money is everything (arrogant), friends who consider money is treasure (stupid), friends who consider money is nothing (careless), friends who donβt believe that money is a thing (maybe almost dead), friends who have little money (poor), friends who constantly borrow money (lazy). Complete experience. π
What is money to us? We both donβt have special place for money at the same time we have special space for money. It is a tool. It is the replaceable at times, the irreplaceable at others. It is what it is with given context. We both agree that a question of βwhat is moneyβ doesnβt need an accurate answer; it just needs honest response. Answer is too rigid and feels like a reaction; response is more flexible and almost a wisdom. Example? If having money makes us think we are more respectable than others, that is an accurate answer. If having no money makes us think we are less than others, that is an accurate answer. If having money makes us more functional as human beings in some situation, that is an honest response. If having no money makes us less complaining and harder working, that is an honest response.
We both donβt expect to be in forever comfort by having so much money yet donβt want to live uncomfortably because of having not enough money. We simply want to have sufficient amount as what is needed in life.
This visit puts me back on track that βlife is just like thatβ at the same time βlife is worth fighting for and beautifully livingβ with good will and a small touch of power from money.
Before driving me to the airport, she commented on my eyes.
BF: Have you put eyeliner?
Me: No
BF: Told you to always put eyeliner. You have one?
Me: Ya
BF: What colour?
Me: Brown
BF: No, no. Try blue.
Me: (frown on my forehead). I donβt have blue one.
BF: Try this. (handing a blue eyeliner to me)
Me: (reluctantly putting blue eyeliner on both eyes)
BF: Look at that! Brighter eyes! Ok, take it. Wear blue eyeliner more.
Me: Ok, as long as not green that turns me to a green-eyed. How much is it?
BF: I am not selling it to you. A tiny token of friendship. Not everything should be paid with money. Thanks for the birthday gift, too.
Manusia mengembarai langit Manusia menyusuri cakrawala Tidak untuk menguasainya Melainkan untuk menguji dirinya Apakah dia bertahan menjadi manusia, Tidak untuk hebat kuasa atau perkasa Melainkan untuk setia sebagai manusia.
(Emha Ainun Nadjib)
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Good morning, Surabaya. You did a lot of moulding to this human being. Thank you!!! π
thank you π for making me a human being; I wonβt give up moulding this self to be loyal to being humane
Off days on the move Between cities, finding me Missing one cityβ
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This evening we sat down in a cafe which is never my favourite to do. A new friend said βSingapore is the least favourite city of mine.β and I didnβt mind. Yet suddenly something knocked on my heart; it triggered me to miss a home.
The orchids that greet me with no complaint. The books that wait for me patiently. The laundry that stand by until I let them sit nicely in the cupboard. The floor that shines after some mopping. The air that hugs me through rain and shine. The warm feeling of safety and security.
How I miss myself in a home which I officially call a home. A weird feeling about Singapore that is truly now to me a home.
See you soon, my humble abode. π
Salaam.
missing a pink lily, Iβll get one when Iβm home π
Garden of the death Where pray and wish are whispered To eternityβ
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plaque of cemetery of kings of Mataramgate to the bathing pool for women; women should at least take ablution before entering the graveyard complexgate to the graveyard complex of kings of Mataram; visitor can only enter this enclosure by wearing Javanese apparel: kemben for female and surjan for maleas I didnβt want to wear kemben, I preferred not entering the graveyard complex and decided to take some pics (with my bag) under a tropical fruit tree called kepel aka Stelechocarpus burahol
Hello, dear friendship. This ship is sailing smoothly, Storms donβt ruin our cruise.
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Four are (fake) backpackers. One is (true) camper. We all sail together in a ship called friendship.
Alfatihah.
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a visit to a best friendβs youth center, this woman dedicates her life to accompany those needing support; the main house is for the classes, sitting room and kitchen; the front is a pendhopo for bigger discussion group plus tiny senthong for librarya visit to a best friend, a Javanese dancer cum lecturer, the wife of a late most well-known puppeteer in the country and the mother of a most sought-after teenage puppeteer in the island π god bless her and family π dear photographer, why do you always block me in group selfie? πYuki after playing with my dress π hey, youβll meet a vet , youβd better watch out π
Donβt let anything and anyone be a happiness snatcher even if they hurt you unintentionally or intentionally.
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Feel good is successfully deciphering the codes in my life.
final hunt of interior doors and window done!4 windows, 3 doors – not easy to find lovable ones in tact in high quality; thanks to an antique collector who is willing to let go off his collection to me ππΌ
The green yard behind Is where greets and smiles soft-land On the plate and glass.
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Jiwa Jawiβs my backyard – found that the owner is a good friend of my best friendβs. she briefed me about the environment and seems that i can only raise cats, not dogs πtorch ginger aka kecombrang one of the major herbs grown within Jiwa Jawi, the more than 15,000sqm-garden-homeiga sapi bumbu rujak, lunch today πwith neighbours to be after 6-hour chat filled with warmth laughter and experience sharing π I humbly thank you!
Wondered about home. Has wandered finding a home. Sheβs learnt sheβs a home.
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Feel good is feel home wherever she is.
not bored (yet) with this place, dβOmah is my omah before my omah is fully ready for weekend getawaymessing around before unpackingMbah Petruk, youβre not supposed to be in my bathroom – ladies only π
Red rose on white tomb: Greeting to another world That sees but says notβ
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Nyekar is one tradition that many Javanese still keep until today. Nyekarcomes from the word sekar that means flower. Nyekar is sprinkling flowers on to someoneβs tomb as part of a prayer to the loved ones lying under the tomb.
Javanese pin a meaning to the word and activity of nyekar by relating it with the flowersβ fragrance, colours and shapes. The fragrance and beauty of the flowers sprinkled on to the tomb are sent as supplementary to the prayer whispered by those βvisiting the deadβ. At the same time it is to remind the living that it should be the good deed and memories of the dead to be cherished; bad memories and bad deed should be neutralised through forgiveness β not easy but doable.
Aside from flowers Javanese add boreh as part of the flowers sprinkled. Boreh literally means to spread or to smear cream or paste on to skin. Borehis mixture of ground dlingo (Acorus calamus L) and bengkle or bengle or bangle (Zingiber cassumunar). Dlingo has a keratabasa (acronym) of elingothat means to remember. Bengkle has a keratabasa of becikkelakuane that means good deed. In short, boreh is added to the flowers to emphasize the importance of remembering the good deed of the dead they visit.
What a beautiful visit is made to the dead by those Javanese who understand what they sprinkle on to the tomb of their loved ones.
So, no it is not just beautiful flowers or flowers arrangement; more than that, it is the beautiful meaning that Javanese pinned to the flowers.
Salaam.
the best remembrance is remembrance to the death β I picked one rose from my sisterβs garden and put it on my fatherβs tomb; we donβt miss him as his good deed is always with us
Tragic is comic After fermentation time. Dark jokes bring bright joy.
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We always remember how our father loved our mother. He liked giving gifts to her and doing household chores like cleaning the floor and doing heavy laundry. Yet he also enjoyed teasing my mother around; his goal was to make her angry just to show that he was good at calming her down. π Yet his strong affection to our mother did one extreme discomfort to her and some of us.
This morning my older siblings asked mother to re-tell a story that we the younger donβt record well as we were too young to save the moment. While they laughed before she started telling the story, we three waited curiously.
Mother: Once I went with my friend to a beauty parlour. She wanted to have her hair cut.
Younger children: With whom?
Mother: (mentioning a name that we are familiar with)
All children: (commenting about motherβs friend who happened to be a very fashionable woman at that time)
Mother: She said that I should have my hair made curly or at least wavy so I could look different. I said no because I should get permission from your father. But you know her, she was able to convince me to do it.
All children: (laughing and commenting about the lady who spent money like she would die today. Mother said that woman got much money from ex husbands so she deserved to do it.) So, curled or waved?
Mother: Medium curled
Older children: (laughing and commenting how she looked fresh but weird as we had never had anyone with curly hair in the family before)
Mother: When I reached home, your father seeing me with curly hair looked surprised. I thought it would be a terrific moment but then it changed to one terrible day. He was so angry, never before he became that angry.
Older children: Ya, I was shocked. Never saw him like that beforeβ
Mother: I was not shocked with his reaction but the next action of his was a biggest discomfort in my life. He said he wanted to make the hair look better which I thought minor trimming and he took a pair of scissors.
Older children: I didnβt expect that to happen. He cut most of the curly hair and only left the one with very vague curls near the headskin. You were almost bald! (laughing) You became so not you.
Me: (upset) Why didβt you run to hide and protect your hair?
Older children: Hey! Donβt be too serious. He didnβt hurt her.
Me: But he hurt her pride! I wonβt let my hair be screwed up by anyone.
Older children: I remember mother sobbed and I screamed to father to stop. He didnβt do it harshly, but I felt worried about her sobbing.
Me: Damn wrong thing! I never knew he would have this in the checklist.
Mother: No worry. He regretted and apologized on the same day. And trust me it was the only one bad thing he did to me. He said he didnβt want me to draw attention of other men.
Older children: Jeeeaaaalousy! We know some other things about his jealousy! You should tell more stories.
Mother: I think it was the best lesson for him about how he should not be too possessive.
All children: Yaaa!!! Agree!
Older children: Do you remember that you turned to be a better fashionista than her. I remember you wore turban and sometimes wigs.
Mother: Yes. And I guess he regretted it even more as I asked for different wigs and turbans until my hair was good enough to show.
What a comedy! Oops! What a tragedy turning to comedy after some time!
Lesson learnt: choose the best expression of love to avoid bad impression, donβt have your hair curled π, find a husband who doesnβt hate curly hair π, forgive your husbandβs wrong expression while educating him, and see a comedy in a tragedy
Good chirp of two birds Fill the air with random songs Above golden trees.
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Time flies when we spend it with those we love. How would I not thank this life for giving me abundance of them? Good to have a holiday at home before spending more holidays outdoor faraway from them after this. π
I am blessed. π
installation art of two golden birds – good time is a chat of two sisters remembering the sweet and the shit π
About a nation Thatβs almost collapsed and dead. Life has a cycle.
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Holiday is always a time to have a small discussion about trivial facts that grows to a more serious discussion about bigger things like a damaged bridge topic growing to a discussion about a nation that starts to collapse slowly and surely.
Nothing is forever. Even if you think you are better, smarter, swifter and richer; it will end either with your fall or your death whichever comes first. How cruel! No, thatβs just a cycle.
a damaged bridge (a hot yet stupid discussion on the train from Jakarta to Yogyakarta) – I love stupidity π
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