Ocean Welcomes

Ocean welcomes all,
River flown and rain fallen.
Friends in a friendship—

A meet up with my first mentor training me in my current profession almost 20 years ago. He and his wife are in Singapore to celebrate their 10th wedding anniversary and spend this whole day to meet up with me: shopping in Orchard Road Apple Store, browsing around looking for my favourite Japanese restaurant that was found closed down since 2021, having lunch (Indonesian food in Singapore….? Oh my) walking around Orchard Road, taking MRT for fun, enjoying evening coffee in Starbucks Bugis Junction before our farewell.

This wise couple gave me a bunch of advices to be this and to be that…. How lovely this life is to have friends who are willing to share their (personal) experiences for precious lesson learning.

Thank you, Pak Donny and Mbak Maya. See you in Jakarta! 💗🙏🏽

Alfatihah to my dear friends.

three mugs, different content, enjoyed from the same table

Walk Back Not

There’s only one way to leave a forest: its edge. Throw away the doubt.

life is too precious to play complicated games; take away unknown factors from the equation and find a home 🥰
Yogyakarta, a place I dream of being a home when all these muscles give up the hardship – maybe yes maybe no, my bothers said; I said again “at least I know it is now my home”

Cold Breeze

Cold breeze blows softly
On weekends, and on the leaves
Rustling about me.

welcome another weekend 💝

A Home before A Home

Wondered about home.
Has wandered finding a home.
She’s learnt she’s a home.

Feel good is feel home wherever she is.

not bored (yet) with this place, d’Omah is my omah before my omah is fully ready for weekend getaway
messing around before unpacking
Mbah Petruk, you’re not supposed to be in my bathroom – ladies only 😆

Clean Up

Cleaning up the yard
From dry leaves and broken twigs.
Summer is coming.

when you want to eat healthy but your friends think it dirty – a bit of excessively-fermented tempe, chicken feet and soup from any vegetable left in the fridge 😝

Speed

Deaccelerate,
Accelerate on the road.
Life is not a race.

Fasting is a very familiar way of life to Javanese. Called pasa or poso, fasting in Javanese culture is always related to the effort to self align. Many Javanese like doing fasting with or without meditation (tapa brata or topo broto) depending on their commitment.

While Javanese Muslim do at least one month of fasting per year in Ramadhan, fasting in Javanese culture itself came even much earlier before Islam was introduced. While in Islam fasting is between dawn to dusk and the same restriction is commonly applied to all kinds of fasting, Javanese fasting is more varied both in term of period and restriction.

Fasting helps Javanese slow down the pace in their mind, regulate the speed of their ambitious behaviour upon life goals, train themselves to be patient.

There are several kinds of fasting in Javanese culture that are still practiced by relatively many nowadays.

1. Regular fasting
This fasting is done only from dawn to dusk like the Islamic fasting. This is a common practice, many Javanese parents use this kind of fasting to train their children about how to manage their immediate excessive desires and concentration in under pressure situation. I remember when we were elementary and high schoolers, we were instructed by parents to do fasting on Monday and Thursday during yearly school testing weeks. Yes, I felt more focused on my study as I had to prioritise tasks to save energy. Brilliant!

2. Mutih
Mutih is derived from the word putih (white in Javanese, Indonesian, Malay). During this fasting, a person is restricted to eat other than white rice and fresh water for 24 hours started either at dawn or dusk. Ordinary Javanese can do it for one day, three or seven. Yet more advanced (usually senior) Javanese would extend the period as per commitment.

3. Ngasrep or nganyep
Ngasrep is derived from the word asrep that means cool or cold; while nganyep from the word anyep means tasteless. In this kind of fasting the food and drink should be all cool and tasteless. The person is suggested to eat only boiled vegetable without adding taste (salt, sugar, oil, sauces, etc) and drink fresh water. It is mostly done in three days.

3. Ngrowot
Ngrowot is a word derived from the word krowot that means Javanese common carbo source except rice. The person who does this fasting will only eat carbo non rice like sweet potato, suwek (konjac), gembili, gembolo (English please….), taro, cassava and other tubers.

4. Ngebleng
Ngebleng means staying in; so doing this, a person will do regular fasting but very limited food intake allowed without leaving room or house, not meeting anyone, just doing meditation or doing household chores without distraction from anyone. Someone can do it three and seven days and forty days. Not many are doing this as this is a challenging one: not easy to find a place. This fasting is quite heavy because it does not allow sufficient food intake for a long time.

5. Pati geni (pati: turned off, geni: fire)
It literally means “fire turned off”. This is the highest level of Javanese fasting as the restriction applied really tests the person’s very high commitment: s/he is not allowed to eat, drink, sleep including fall asleep and see any light both artificial and natural. How long? The shortest is 24 hours, maximum unlimited. Note: if s/he sleeps or falls asleep, s/he has to restart the fasting.

There are other kinds of fasting in Javanese culture which were done by very limited people and have been left by many due to the impracticality such as pasa ngidang (from the word kidang or deer) in which a person is only allowed to eat raw foliage like a deer, pasa ngalong (from the word kalong or bat) only eating ripe fruit from the tree, pasa kungkum (bathing up to chin level either in the pool, river or shallow sea) without eating or drinking, etc. There are probably other kinds of fasting as Javanese used to be very creative in “fasting engineering” hahaha….

Javanese believe that with fasting they will connect better to themselves and inevitably with the ultimate power of the universe. They will usually become confident people without showing off. Those fasting committed people —if doing it right and without evil intension— will be a highly spiritual people and voluntarily dedicated to environment and people.

Javanese believe that this type of people bring blessings to the surroundings although blessings are not always tangibly seen. The blessings can be as simple as peaceful daily life with little conflict,

Do we still have many of them? In very silent villages around Java island we might still find a few. They are traditional farmers who feel the need to connect with the ultimate power as only that can help them manage their humble farming that is now severely industrialised and exploited.

Hope we still have them in silence. Amen.

Alfatihah.

“too much” in all kinds: portion, protein, sugar, carb – never mind, it’s good! 🥰 my yesterday’s break fasting

Music

Is the one flowing
River? Can be flow of notes
Infusing good air—

Never forget that music is an inseparable part of life. Put some in every part of the day. If all those in the playlist become boring, drop a pencil on to the floor and that’s music. 😊Or, drop a pan on to the floor… No no no, that is music (and louder) but too extreme to listen to. 😁

Salaam.

this album of unique compositions make this Sunday feels like a flowing river 🤗

Small Joy

Blooming orchids show
Vibrant hues waited a while
Without counting time.

I think so much surprise comes to us because we just do without craving for the expected result. Not 100% correct, but that is most what has happened to me. ☺️

Welcome, blooming flowers. You have been as stubborn as the gardener. God bless you! 😍

Sunday is full of cleaning, laundry and sweet surprises!

Salaam.

joyful day celebrating 4 stems of orchid buds from one pot 🤩

A Path

A path to a place
Is walked through trees and uphills.
A meadow is waiting
Opening another path
To a warm home filled with love.

My friend sent me three photos of our beloved “simbah” (those senior people who are considered wise or those who have grandchildren) – Javanese). Most people call these simbah “batik maker” because they make batik to earn a living. We both call them “batik artist”. More than that through what we’ve seen and heard about them, we’ve considered they are artists of their life. How they embrace their humble life gracefully and consciously has always amazed both of us. They live like calm river flowing to the sea. They don’t struggle against what others think about or do to them. They live as if there is no hindrance and disturbance in life.

When my friend told me some things about those three honourable ladies, I secretly harvested some lessons. It is very critical reminder for me who is still very much attached to a feeling of (accidentally) underestimated and (slightly) humiliated because of one petty case. These three artists of life have silently told me to let go.

What a loud shot in a quiet weekend!

No apology is needed. All is gradually let go through my own wish and willingness. This is my life and I only want to be the artist of my own life. 💝

Thank you, artists of life. You’re blessed. 💝

Salaam.

Mbah Suhir, 93 years old 💝 matur sembah nuwun
Mbah Erah, 87 years old 💝 matur sembah nuwun
Mbah Isah, 82 years old 💝 matur sembah nuwun

Colours

The biggest secrets
Are sitting on the eyelids
Without disguising.

there’s a rainbow that beautifully hides in front of white cloud, subtly showing that life is alive as it is – good morning!
clearer before fading away

Good Food

River flows. Wind blows.
Birds perch on a twig and chirp,
Enjoying good food.

Life is not really WYSIWYG, there are layers that can be peeled off like peeling off onions layered skins.

What is seen in a river? Its flow. What’s behind the flow?

What is felt in a wind? Its blow. What’s behind the flow?

What’s behind the singing birds? What’s behind good food?

Something looking like nothing yet there are powerful layers of realities that wrap another deeper level of reality. At the end of the peeled-off onion, what is it? The eyes see “none” that can be immediately ignored, the self sees “the essence” that can only be understood through accepting in silence.

What an experience as a human being! Maybe this is a euphoria of being alive, or being aware? This is a good time and I will always feel good no matter what. 💝

Thank you for everything. 💝

good breakfast for a tempe(h) lover 🥰
good snack for a pumpkin lover – run out of honey this time

It’s You

It’s you, Beloved
That shines and sets in my heart
Bringing in blessings.

sun is shining like the smile of the playful kids 💝
sun is setting like the smile of the wise elders 💝

Weekend Starts Again

Jazzy weekend starts
With a smile under the rain.
I’ve been missing you.

how beautiful the world is and all that has been here

(Im)Perfection

Imperfection, Love:
Perfection on the way. Back
To imperfection.

Perfection, Beloved,
Imperfection on the way.
Back to perfection.

No one is perfect as everyone is imperfection in perfect cycles.

How perfect you are, don’t boast. You are simply “rotten body in progress”. How imperfect you are, wise up. You are the soul “shining in progress”. Your body is deteriorating, your soul is rising.

….

Only if you are willing to slow down.

Enjoy the rest of this weekend!

💝

Rawon set is Eastern Java’s specialty, perfect for weekend before all the home cleaning and ironing and this and that blahblahblah 🥰
the salted egg makes it perfect for those liking extra condiment 👍🏽 oh my it was a torture to this tongue 😌
mix all! lime was needed, a missing condiment this time 🙃
should be a bit longer, tonight is the perfect time
spring onion is the last to plunge in 🥰
beef in
keluwak (black nut), kefir lime leaves, Javanese bay leaves, garlic, shallots, coriander, pepper, galangal, lemongrass

True Message

Thunders, Beloved,
Not sign of rain, but lightning—
Know their true message.

Some messages are exactly like how people play “karambol” (carrom board in English), the player may strike one disk to target another disk. The message is as if for A but actually for B. Or the message is like this but actually that.

Don’t get fooled, dear self.

Welcome, new week full of true messages. 😘

May all beings be happy.

believe true message, only when it’s voiced 🙏🏼

Sweet Welcome

Welcome, Beloved.
Home is where gifts are opened,
Flowers are blooming.

Welcome home! said they. 💝

3 waiting for 1 week and still in tact like what the couriers’ pictures sent 🥰
new bud in the bathroom 🥰
1 more tiny in the bathroom gang
3 new stems of buds from balcony gang 🥰

Wasted

Wasted, Beloved,
None. In life all’s by design
With scales and measures.

Good morning, Saturday. Thanks for opening the weekend gate. I’m flying back home soon; can’t wait for the sweet surprises!

Salaam. 🙏🏼

not wasted, just not wanted – didn’t eat the yolk not because of health reason but because it was runny, I should have asked if it was hard boiled – in life consciously decide what’s wanted as the Designer is kindly and intelligently making wishes come true in precision and details 🙏🏼

Mood

Bad mood is hunger
Draining mind and tainting heart.
Can food heal the pain?

Certain type of bad mood doesn’t go away easily. It can sit silently consuming emotion for almost 12 hours. Some can be cured with food, some can’t. We still need food anyway.

Unfortunately no one is responsible as the cause, it popped out just like that with the falling rain; yet the self is responsible to get through it patiently.

😌

from this – kepok banana –
both birds and humans love it
to this for late lunch – failed to quiet the mind
from this – Ipoh pomelo, the best one on earth
to this for early dinner – at least cooling the heat in heart gradually

Blessed Day Reclaimed

Cold morning switched off the air conditioner.
Whistling wind wildly knocked on the glass door.
Windy rain greeted Sunday morning.
What dry hanging got re-soaked — a basket of potentially re-wash.

May kindness be absent for a while?
May a pinch of disappointment be sprinkled?
May a drop of despair be shared today?

A promise was wished
To smile,
To laugh,
Or to just close eyes in unbearable
And sleep away,
Or to make noise among fire, water and oil,
Or simply splash some ink on paper or wall—

Claimed—
That this noisy weather
Is less noisy than the kitchen.
And it turns back to a blessed day.

Sometimes it only takes some kitchen noise to save a Sunday.

when you feel bad, boil vegetables and other stuff 🥺
and make them the best gado-gado on earth for this morning’s breakfast! Ok, Sunday, I will stay home the whole day while you get soaked by rain 🙃

Gifts to You

These gifts, Beloved,
Peace and love hummed to loved ones
Living here and there

One of the Javanese and Islamic teachings that I will never leave for the rest of my life is sending gift of prayer containing peace and love to my loved ones wherever they are, whether they are physically wandering on earth or spiritually gathering around life.

I believe that my passing-away ancestors are living in different levels of consciousness (call it hell, heaven or somewhere in between up to your liking) and they are watching their offsprings without being able to directly communicating with us. They deserve my gift as they have been my line to get the chance to be here now. They deserve peace and love as they have done the best they could to draw a meaningful family tree. Yes, some might have made silly mistakes but hey that’s what Buddhism calls “karma”. Yes, some might have caused shameful stains on the family picture but hey that’s what Islam calls “alam syahadah”. Whoever and whatever they were, all of my ancestors deserve good wishes sung to them.

I also wish peace and love to those I love still breathing the air. Wishing all of them health and happiness. 💝

We Javanese Muslim will send gift by reciting some Javanese prayer closed with Alfatihah, a short chapter in the Quran containing peace, love, praise, forgiving, protection and guidance. A basket of beautiful wishes—

How light this heart is to be sure that all whom I love are well.

Alfatihah to all whom I love. You’re loved. You’re blessed. Don’t shop too much. 😁

Happy weekend!

born as part of a nation doesn’t make someone higher or lower – being born a Javanese, Aborigine, African, Arab, Chinese, English, Indian, Japanese, Korean, Sundanese, Vietnamese or whatever is a gifted tool to contribute the best quality of culture in sustaining and respecting humanity – respect yourself, respect other human beings 💕
if not respected (by you), your origin will be a boomerang (spun around hitting you) – be grateful for being born as you are, never wasted, fully loved, surrounded by beloved only if you accept who you are 💕

Pleasure

Pleasure, Beloved,
Sweet moment under the rain—
Sunshine is peeping.

Today’s biking started at 6:30am and ended at 7:15am as the rain began earlier – weather forecast reported rain would fall at around 8am. We decided to fold the bikes in my home then drive to “Kueh & Mee” for breakfast.

Conversation is never boring with this good friend. Any topics about her children are my favourite as those children give me inspiration to be always young in heart how old ever I am and optimistic about life how much low my mental is. Topic about her wanting to go back to work is never nice because that’s when she questions if she is capable of doing this or that; while she is one of intelligent friends I have —- she is an excellent chemist who lets her expertise hibernate and allows her husband to lead a brilliant professional success.

After today’s chatty laughing breakfast, she went home then picked up her husband in Changi Airport, arriving from a biz trip. A long list of tasks were still waiting for her, making me lose reasons to complain about life.

She is one of my favourite people inspiring me with their being ordinary the way they are.

Thank you, Mbak Eva! God bless you. 🥰

one of Indonesian guilty pleasure, lupis 🤓
kopi tarik kosong (Indonesian/Malay pulled coffee with no sugar) + an empty paper cup of (eaten) hard boiled eggs

Good Words

Good words, Beloved,
Postcard sent in holiday
Showing what one’s seen.

My mother’s question after saying hello at lunch time is always “What did you cook today?” And she’ll say “Delicious!” when I send the food picture although she might say differently when tasting it. Both are happy, and that’s the most important thing.

May all beings be happy.

today’s work in rainy day

What Are You

Behind what’s seen,
What are you, Beloved?

Root of a tree
Who grows in in the dark,
Breathes with the creepy crawly,
Sleeps in none of seasons.
Silently grateful for
What’s not understood.

Cartilage of a human body
Who is not hard enough to be bone,
Not soft enough to be muscle,
Comfortably sits in between,
Catches messages delivered
By whisper, breeze and wind.

Jasmine sambac of the garden
Who is humbly tiny, clustering;
Blooms the whole year,
Leaves much fragrance to the day,
Deep meaning to celebration
Before she dries brown.

Helium of the sun
Light, low, odourless, tasteless, insipid—
It’s peaceful to be low profile,
It’s more joyful and freer,
It’s easier to be me,
Closer to Gaia.

Yet no secret bandit among
The rascals in the block!

What?!

What what?!
Don’t ask. I can be anything
But
You.

Rainy weekend is good especially when just have to shortly reply “Ok!” to a message saying “Heavy rain. Impossible to bike. Rain check ya.”

💝

🥰 can watch this forever! lovable rascals!

Weekend

Weekend? Relaxing, cooking, laundry, house-cleaning. Rain makes it cool! Sweet!

buy the Nutella, grill the banana
buy the bread, cook the chicken
drizzle some honey to the sour mango
ready to iron
surviving aglaonema 🥰 the leaves are getting smaller, needs more soil
some just love to leaf – patiently waiting for her flowering
surviving kencur! 😘
surviving Javanese coriander 😘
dollar leaves (zamia) 😁

Lazed Days

Lazed two, Beloved,
Wrapping up five passing by;
Seven in a pack—

Always ready to work, always ready to rest 💝

hello, my babies…. 😘

these duo are in slow mode for almost 3 years, yet they give me the extraordinary rooting! 🥰

third flower after the second departed early – thanks for welcoming me 😘

Bright Day

Bright day, Beloved,
Earth opens all passages,
Men and nature blend.

Pump the tyres and enjoy this bright day!

waking up rather late, saw a line of bikers hustling on the street chasing another group leaving them – traffic light is a huge factor to win 😎

With Love

With love, Beloved,
All is done and completed.
How would she not thank?

one of the doors of my humble abode should be adorned with climbing rose like this 💝
and one of the windows, so when the window is opened I breathe love from the pink roses 💗

Clay But Not A Kendi

Clay art, Beloved,
Hugged by earth, hardened by sun
Livened by heaven—

In Java island clay was commonly used not only to make art work but also as material to make kitchenware, eating utensils, plant pots, etc. Kasongan, Yogyakarta is one of famous villages of clay work industry in which different types of clay art and utensils are mass produced or customised as per buyers’ request.

One clay utensil that I often used in my childhood was kendi, a clay jug used to contain drinking water – it makes drinking water smell subtly earthy and feels cooly fresh. Children would dispense water from the jug to glass to drink; adult would usually just lift the kendi slightly above mouth level and dispense the water directly to their open mouth without touching the tip of the kendi mouth to their mouth — whoa so difficult to explain!

Kendi is not however commonly used as the function is now replaced by plastic containers and refrigerator. It is now mostly used in Javanese traditional ceremony or in some households that still want to keep some traditional way of life. I prepare 5 kendi to compliment the fridge in my Javanese home — 5 kendi are ready before the dining table is ready 😁

kendi – used to contain drinking water at home, outside the gate of Javanese houses (for passers by to drink when thirsty), in the field, almost everywhere

Kendi is actually an acronym (kerata basa in Javanese grammar) of “kendalining diri” (kendalining: control, diri: self) or self control. In Javanese culture kerata basa is used to tie a good teaching to what people is doing. So, practically kendi is not a personal utensil like spoon and fork, anyone can share it. Through the name Javanese know that using kendi, there shall be some self control applied. When someone drinks directly from the clay jug, one should do it carefully to minimise the risk of dropping the kendi and break it; and not greedily gulp all water as other family members or friends also need fresh water in that hot day.

Culturally (at least according to Greek mythology and Quran) human being’s physical is created from clay —like kendi— that is given soul by the Source and so we are breathing. So it is natural that human beings are fundamentally attached to earth. Yet how much ever human beings want to stay as firm, strong, young, beautiful like the clay coming from earth, it is not possible. There is breathing that fans the “fire of life” in the clay body and when it stops “fanning”, the clay body stops functioning.

Can’t live forever, some like to play “forever pretending”. Pretending to be young or beautiful or firm with plastic surgery. Pretending to be happy with some drugs. Pretending to be more precious than others with fake luxury and conspiracy. Pretending this and that.

Ah! That game! That’s fun indeed! Yet it is not doable for me. Being human is not an easy job, pretending makes it even difficult and complicated and unnecessary. So please count me out. 💃🏽

Hey! If some people want to live forever or stay young, firm, strong, beautiful and fully functional; they’d better be a kendi. 😂

Salaam….

we are too clay art work who will someday be bodily back to earth, while some part will “evanesced”, be absorbed back to the source – before the time, I’ll keep this self enhanced to being human in joy and glee humbly and originally 💝