Was madly in love,
Still am…. Realm is the limit.
…. With you, Beloved—
—————————————————————
Where is the end of love journey? Either hopelessness or time 💝
Alfatihah 💕
Madly In Love
Category: Poetic
Time Takes Side
Time flows, Beloved,
To an estuary of hope.
Time flows, Beloved,
To the eternity sea.
Won’t be long before we meet—
Time flows, Beloved
To you through me. White beacon
Blinks red at low tide.
Wind says the woodlands miss me.
Time flows, Beloved. Thank you.
—————————————————————
Don’t take too long a time to fix an issue. Time wisely travels with those willing to appreciate a journey through action taking along with wisdom harvesting. Otherwise, it will bulldoze what’s not solved.
Dear January. I know you’ll transform with me who doesn’t want remedial lessons next year.
Thank you, 2021. Welcome, 2022.
Bismillaahirrahmaanirrahiem….
💝
Storytelling
Once upon a time:
A phrase introduced early,
Permanently stayed—
—————————————————————-
When I was a child, adult people around me would tell kinds of stories especially under the full moon, and they always started the tales with once upon a time.
Although knowing that the tales were fictional, we children would still believe that those characters lived at the same time with us, it was just a distance apart, and that the lessons ought to be seriously taken by us— the naive little human beings. We have grown where making mistakes (formulated by moral values) is a shame, we were afraid of becoming those antagonist with unhappy endings in the stories told to us.
Storytelling is powerful indeed. How would I believe that behaving to parents without saying no is paramount in a human being’s life if it was not because of “Malinkundang” tale.
It took me years and years to understand that being well behave can be by saying no to anyone possible; and it was also because of listening to “Malinkundang” from different point of view.
It is at the end the sovereignty that frees human beings from their own toxicity. And it all starts with free questioning and responsible reasoning.
Wisdom isn’t about saying yes or no, it’s about saying yes or no in an appropriate way with respect to self and others.
Hey! I can’t say no to being vegetarian until I run errands and feed my fridge. 😁
Cane And Root
No cane, root can be.
Woods’re a case where food’s stored
Use your axe and fire.
—————————————————————
My fridge had not much for me to cook. There was only green here and there. Alamak! What to do?
Limitation is where creativity waits to be picked. Let’s do the experiment. Just don’t burn the kitchen.
Ahhhh! My roasted potato and pumpkin soup turned to be exactly the same as those served in 5-star restaurant. Really? Might not be but…. Sorry, my tongue comments what my tongue tastes. 😁
Alhamdulillah. May all beings be happy.
Complete Life
Swear me, Beloved,
Taste the life as a package.
Or else you don’t live.
———————————————————-
High blood pressure is my best friend who always visits me after lamb party. It knocks on the door and slips into the bedroom then dances, swirling like a dervish. 😵
Lamb is good and gives me a beautiful headache! A complete package to sleep soundly.
🐑
Alhamdulillah….
My Doors
A door, Beloved,
Reflects a host. Open, shut,
To which wind sources.
Or affects a host? Can be.
Decision and reflection—
————————————————————
Know your door, Beloved. Some winds are good and calming, some strong and disturbing. Not all winds should be welcomed. Close your door if you’re not ready with cleaning and tidying in your home.
😎
These five senses are doors, too.
Welcome, Tuesday! I’m welcoming you with warm heart because you’re a nice wind to this home.
🍃
Dream Team
Dream team is unique—
Bright, with little craziness
To keep all intact.
——————————————————-
This dream team isn’t ideally perfect. The members argue and debate. We confuse and get confused at some turning points before clarity. We can be tired.
It is a perfect fit though for me. We fight for what we believe is right. We silently inspire each other. We don’t fit in others’ squares, are strongly reasonable and on point though. We don’t easily give up. We can accept wide spectrum of ideas and behaviours.
When everyone sings and the composition is clear in hand, no one can deny the unison in a choir. Ya, there is always one Snoopy-ing with its unknown tunes that (believe it or not) always makes other singers happier, more energised and the whole team glued and valued. That is how a dream is shared without discrimination. Snoopy being Snoopy is always needed for laughter and contemplation! That’s my dream team!
I don’t need perfect team because a dream team is not about a group of perfect people with perfect behaviour. It is about a group of imperfect heads with open mind and progressive appreciation sitting together to perfect a common goal to the right direction.
Holiday is going to be over…. Ready to sing again. Let’s wait what is the song and who is willing to be Snoopy-ing next year — ya, take turn, take turn ya…. 😁
May all beings be happy.
Scented World
Flowers scent the air
With messages telling her
To follow North Star.
The path brings her to the gate
Where home is a state of mind.
————————————————————-
Home is where the heart belongs to. This wanderer finds it where she is. Now and here….
Red Leaves
Red leaves, Beloved,
Are red yet the eyes might catch
Different reds. Normal—
————————————————————-
My red is a red no matter how red is mine compared to others’ reds. I respect others’ reds by not questioning their ability to perceive a red. In fact I only care about the reds of those in my inner circle in order to live harmoniously; and, those working together in order to ensure that the red is articulated precisely with no misunderstanding by all work partners.
Alhamdulillah.
May all beings be happy in this Christmas Eve. 💝
MacRitchie National Park
Green, lush forest trail
Where fresh air infuses life
With hopes and good vibes.
————————————————————
Today’s 4-hour walk in MacRitchie National Park gave me full stock of tropical vibes that will last for a year ahead keeping me positively motivated.
Wish there are more and bigger places like this in more countries especially in South East Asia so that people can find sanctuaries to breathe in cleaner tropical air for a while after busily working in populated buildings where air is conditioned or in factories where excessive chemicals are used or made.
Thanks, Singapore for keeping some managed greeneries which keeps the oxygen happily circulated.
🌳
Merry Christmas, Long Weekend
Wish you, Beloved,
Sent with white heart through the air
And short holiday
——————————————————————
Christmas falls on Sunday so it’s replaced with a day off on the following Monday. I take 2 days of special shut-down on 23 and 24 so…. It is a long weekend for 2021’s Christmas. Whoohoo!
As much as missing my family, I don’t have enough gut to go back to Indonesia which still applies 10-day quarantine in Jakarta while I still have to fly to Surabaya before meeting my mother.
“It’s fine, you stay safe there. Take good care of yourself,” said they. That’s enough as blessings to me.
So? Where to go?
Pulau Ubin by bike!
Al Fatihah to all celebrating Christmas and those enjoying holiday! 💕
How To See The Self
Mirror on the wall,
I’m the prettiest of all?
It cracks up. Masks gone—
————————————————————-
Ah, weekends of mid December! Work is slowing down on several days. Weekends feel like starting on Friday morning. I have some longer time to talk to the mirror and find that I’m still there! A hidden innocent rascal nicely sitting behind layers of curtains
Masquerade on break!
🤡👻🤖👽😈👹👺🎭💩🎃👾🤠
🥰
May all beings be happy! 💝
The One
Unclear, Beloved?
You’re still the one. You don’t know?
I think you don’t care.
Such a funny thing. Apart
Yet close. Burst the bubble please.
—————————————————————-
Misunderstood language of life endangers the only link connecting the lover and the beloved: vibrating in silence.
It looks like an internet: the network is there, it simply needs to be connected. It might be hardware or software malfunction? Anyway it’s a matter of choice, fix it or ignore it.
🖖🏼
Matur Nuwun
The boughs touch the ground
Showing respect to nature,
Mother who loves all.
Fruits are ready to harvest
Everyday. Farmers’ blessings—
———————————————————-
One of those teaching me constant gratitude is my mother. When I share my problems, she will either tell me “We should be grateful that our problems are still solvable” or “We are still lucky that we are still given blessings when having problems” or “It is ok, someday they will understand”.
That lady is made of flexible rubber when hit by hard challenges. Nothing hurt her blessed heart. I’m lucky to be born by her. I guess God has sent her to teach me patience….
…. and at the same time to be patient. Hallow…. It takes patience to deal with patient people. I mean it!
Matur nuwun, Ibu. I love you. 💝
You, Air
Air— warm, hot or cold
Glides through all cavities
Of bodies for life.
—————————————————————
I want to forget you for the rest of my life and in the next life and the next next next ones but these senses are too intelligent, able to capture the most minuscule amount of signs and symbols that you’re around.
Let me celebrate your noise everyday. Thank you for knocking on all senses doors.
Salaam…. 💝
One by One
Colours will fade away
At the front gate of
A new season,
Leaving beautiful memories
To the garden.
No regret, Beloved
If all are infused with love.
No right,
No wrong.
Only lessons,
And wisdom
Imprinted—
Cycle is short;
Life is forever.
Each of the pearls in a strand is perfect when it’s loose. And so is a cycle in your life—
If I owe you one cycle,
Beloved,
I’ll come back
With a bunch of fruits
Ready to harvest.
Ready to taste
By your own senses—
See you again,
Beloved.
Choose what seed you want me to grow.
—————————————————————-
Flowers losing petals is a natural phase before plants are harvested for the fruits, the bulbs or other parts. Or, the flowers are the ones harvested to experience falling petals before they dry out naturally. It’s an end of one cycle at the same time a start of another.
May all beings be happy.
Thanksgiving
Thanks for everything
Not only abundance, but
Also scarcity.
—————————————————————
Online work mode has made people think creatively to minimize boredom including inserting some fun through dress code in online meetings. This time thanksgiving. Yay!
I’ve read some history and the development of that tradition, not a fans though because I am raised a Javanese who is supposed to thank every day —every moment if possible— with whatever reason. If you don’t have reasons to be grateful, find one.
For being a human being. For being a female. For being one rascal in the family. For being a persistent colleague. For the abundance. For the scarcity. For being me now.
If it is still hard to thank for who you are, Beloved, just be you with the layers of fear, hope and awe.
Thank you! For everything 🐣
You
Secretly
You,
Obviously
You,
You here,
You there.
Damn!
You are everywhere.
I’m awake, remembering
You.
Asleep, dreaming of
You,
I’m alone, imagining about
You.
Among the crowd, getting attacked by
You.
These five senses recognise the very
You.
Why
You?
No reason why, it is just
You.
But where are
You?
So distant
Yet
So much close.
Oh
You….
————————————————————
🎼
Which Is To Display
David, Beloved,
Was Carrara’s waste without
Il Divino’s hands
Writing, panting— Comissioned
By those governing the time.
—————————————————————————————————-
14 Peaks: Nothing Is Impossible has given me good lessons and at the same time pleasing encouragement to continue being me this way.
The biggest lesson comes to me is a reminder: When the applause goes to a record breaker, who is supporting whom?
Samwise Gamgee has helped Frodo Baggins complete the quest to destroy The Ring in Tolkiens’ Middle Earth. Ron and Hermione is a core team behind Harry Potter. Huckleberry Finn might have been the greatest support to Tom Sawyer. Tonto to Lone Ranger…. It is Tenzing Norgay in Hillary Edmund’s phenomenal climbing, and he is a real not a fictional character.
This movie shows me more and more clearly that sherpas have honourably let the payers step on the mountain peaks when it comes the time for standing ovation to the project leaders who will be recorded as record breakers; while sherpas were actually leading at the front during climbing, the real first steppers of most if not all tracks before others.
The guides have managed what is even not yet seen by the guided— both risk and challenge, yet the guides never act Mr/Ms Know All because guides’ job is to guide not to show off. The guides bring the guided to victory.
🏔
Only real winners appreciate their supporters. Otherwise, they are only recorded false achievers in the other layers of reality.
Life is but pastime and game for those being sherpas. Which to display is about facets of the same polished rock.
May all beings be happy.
Old Rabbits Eat Wisely
Green leaves and grasses
Blanket black soil with freshness.
Good food for rabbits—
————————————————————
Greenery is enjoyed through many ways. Today’s best is chewing the texture and tasting the fragrant freshness.
Year of Tiger is coming soon. Old rabbit should eat more wisely.
May all beings be happy. 💝
Slow Down
Crickets’ night singing,
Fireflies’ lighting will be back
When brain work slows down.
————————————————————-
Night is here, time to rest the grey matter.
Picture borrowed from https://www.nytimes.com
Generous Nature
Lily bulbs come back
Among red leaves in autumn.
Second chance from Her—
—————————————————————-
What is second chance? Once again? Or again and again like lily bulbs that come back every autumn and bloom beautifully until forever ends?
Mother Nature has taught me that mistake doesn’t come with punishment; it comes with lesson to be a better human being, someone who has purer intention and clearer attention. She consistently brings messages about acceptance that no one will be perfect as imperfection is an included package to realise and/or materialise perfection. That welcoming the next good day is doing the best today. That if the next now called tomorrow is here, the second chance has welcome me to be a better me. A me that’s more me than before—
I remember my Kyoto trip in 2014, my first encounter with spider lily. Fascinated, I sat down on the grass for quite long time in front of a temple with my camera until a beautiful Japanese (old) lady stopped by me.
“Hana! Hana! Hana!” She said smiling, with her thumbs pointed to the lily then to my camera.
“Ya! Ya! Ya! Thank you! Beautiful flowers!”
It was a surprise for me. A moment with no preparation. A short act with no anticipation. She just went away with her wise old smile.
That lady was probably sent to me as a second chance to re-define what possibly a Japanese truly looks like as the previous week I didn’t have a good experience with another one in Nagano.
I won’t probably meet with her again, yet enough for me to know that when I’m that age, I’d like to be as friendly and warm as her. 💝
Thank you for everything that comes with second chance, even second chance after my second chance so that in the second second chance I realise that it is my second chance not to be missed.
Al-Fatihah for all those who miss the second chance and those who are waiting for a second chance.
Salaam….
Both pictures are borrowed from https://www.japanvisitor.com/japanese-culture/seasons/higanbana
What Kind of Neighbour Am I?
Dear mango flowers,
Bloom when I’m home, have some fruits.
Let’s visit neighbours.
—————————————————————-
If you do good, your neighbours will be good, too. Really?
Not always. Sometimes however good you are, your neighbours will be not so good. Yet still do good, just give fewer mangoes to them.
Good discount should be given in some special occasions, right?
Hey, Neighbours! 🍀
Younger and Braver
Dry leaves fall or fly
Away from a tree, decay.
Absorbed by the tree—
———————————————————-
What will I tell the younger me if I meet her?
Be you, bravely.
Dream even bigger. No one can stop you without your permission.
One more thing…. You know more than you’ve ever thought, you just don’t see it clearly; adjust the view finder and open your very eyes!
So much love,
The older you 🐣
Masa-Masa (A Song That Believes in Time)
Time’s a messenger
Telling her what is waiting
In every milestone—
Her comrades, trees and water
Read the signs to reach the home.
—————————————————————————————
Some peoples are born laid-back with all the gifts from Mother Nature. Life make them realise nature is as tough as it is rich and so those peoples shape their bodies as hard as rock, their muscle wire, their bones iron, their mind clear water, their intention straight arrow. Time is the witness. Time is Messenger. Time will not betray human beings who work hard and pray.
I’m thankful to be born in a rich archipelago and re-born repeatedly among hardworking peoples.
Weekend, Weekend…. Washing, ironing, cooking— repeated milestones, be patient.
🦸🏻♀️
Self Worth
That you feel
Better,
Smarter,
Luckier,
Richer,
Prettier
Than others
Might
Not
Be
Self worth,
Beloved.
—————————————————————
Today’s discussion with some friends was about self worth. One head, one point of view—
My own understanding about self worth has evolved. Its turning point was in 2009 after a broken heart. World was ruined. Hope was (almost) zero. The worst was the way I was cut from the relationship; it made me feel of having no self worth. It was a time of emotionally shutting down like an un-charged computer; functional intellectually and physically but not emotionally— zombie in the making.
Dumbest young me!
I thought self worth was when I was do things better than others. Or, knowing more than others. Or, given a lot of things out of the blue as if winning lucky draws again and again. Gaining financial freedom and material things. Or feeling prettier than others (this one very seldom) at least prettier than Bob, my cat.
What is self worth in my system?
— self worth is about utilitarianism. Miriam Webster dictionary says utilitarianism is a doctrine that the useful is the good and that the determining consideration of right conductshould be the usefulness of its consequences; specifically a theory that the aim of action should be the largest possible balance of pleasure over pain or the greatest happiness of the greatest number.
If I’m good. So what? What have I done for my own self at the same time for others by being good, smart, lucky, financially independent?
If being good, smart, lucky, financially independent doesn’t bring benefits to others; where’s my worth? Is worth to self not enough, said someone. Not wrong; if the perspective of ‘self’ is about taking. In fact, life is always about giving and taking, or taking and giving.
“The best of people are those that bring most benefit to the rest of mankind,” said Islamic wisdom. It is equivalent with “urip iku urup” in Javanese wisdom.
Lo! No matter what people perceive about me as long as I do good to my own self and surrounding with good will, so be it.
May all beings be happy. 🪶
What Line of Life Am I?
If your life is a line, Beloved,
What line would you draw?
Straight?
Curve?
Curly?
Zig-zag?
Dotted?
Whatever it is,
Know
It has
A start
And
An end.
!
Well, I prefer making
A
Close-
Looped
Line.
♾
Love Lives Life
This breeze blows gently
Sending a dowry of Life
From Love, sincerely.
—————————————————-
Breathe…. It’s what Life has shown that Love still wants to live.
Salaam. 🙏🏼
Aromatic Evening
Coffee and cacao
Who won’t love their aroma?
Combined, it’s greater!
————————————————————-
After a full day, I decided to try a recipe that has invited me since forever. Steamed cake – coffee, cacao with a bit of cheese!
I’m not a fans of cheese and coffee but chocolate has been the love of my life since I didn’t even know chocolate was concocted from cacao seeds whose trees were grown in the front yard of Bu Har, the Art teacher in junior high school.
It’s always exciting to find sweet memories in bits of your work.
Tada!
Forever
A strand of white pearls
Harvested in the deep sea
Bedazzles her neck.
————————————————————
There is time when I regret of what’s done and nervous about what will happen. Why did I do that? I should have done this. What if I fail again? I am not good enough.
I used to think money was everything with happiness but I prove that money is the biggest illusion in life that I misunderstood. Now I consider money should be merely a tool, never a purpose. Yet I still think of what if my company stock price decreases? 😁
I used to look for happiness and protection in a relationship. With experiences I become strongly convinced that only a healthy relationship with the self can help me cope with problems; moreover, without healthy relation with my self any relationship with others won’t work well. Yet I still don’t heal from broken heart easily and still think whether or not I will meet someone I can share some simple happiness and shelter with.
I was between life and death situations more than once for some illness before, and so helpless about future. And gradually I realise that death can come anytime even when people are healthy. Yet I still hope I die when I let go of any confusion and live in clarity.
However, there is time when I know that only in the now I can accept everything. In the now I can shed tears with mixture of gratefulness for what’s breaking my heart and blessings of what’s boosting the quality of life. In the now I can smile just by seeing piling laundry waiting for ironing. In the now I can see the canvas is the door of self healing. In the now I can imagine sending a cake full of love for my loved ones who live in many different places, whom I cannot visit with many reasons. In the now I can see shades of real and true happiness in each and every experience from wake up to sleep.
Thank you for the now and now and now that form a strand of pearls called forever.
I live forever until the last now meets with the first now.
Al Fatihah to all of my loved ones across the oceans. I bless you happiness.
Salaam….
rike jokanan 
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