graphs of my Universe
Flowers scent the air
With messages telling her
To follow North Star.
The path brings her to the gate
Where home is a state of mind.
————————————————————-
Home is where the heart belongs to. This wanderer finds it where she is. Now and here….
Red leaves, Beloved,
Are red yet the eyes might catch
Different reds. Normal—
————————————————————-
My red is a red no matter how red is mine compared to others’ reds. I respect others’ reds by not questioning their ability to perceive a red. In fact I only care about the reds of those in my inner circle in order to live harmoniously; and, those working together in order to ensure that the red is articulated precisely with no misunderstanding by all work partners.
Alhamdulillah.
May all beings be happy in this Christmas Eve. 💝
Green, lush forest trail
Where fresh air infuses life
With hopes and good vibes.
————————————————————
Today’s 4-hour walk in MacRitchie National Park gave me full stock of tropical vibes that will last for a year ahead keeping me positively motivated.
Wish there are more and bigger places like this in more countries especially in South East Asia so that people can find sanctuaries to breathe in cleaner tropical air for a while after busily working in populated buildings where air is conditioned or in factories where excessive chemicals are used or made.
Thanks, Singapore for keeping some managed greeneries which keeps the oxygen happily circulated.
🌳
Sail by a bumboat
To linger where nature’s mixed
With preserved good life.
——————————————————-
Finally I visited Pulau Ubin, the only place in Singapore where there are no apartment buildings, malls or highways. It just a kampung (village in Malay language). Cool and green!
Wikipedia: On 3 June 2005, the Singapore Government ordered that all the farmers rearing poultry on the island were to ship them to mainland Singapore and rear them in government-approved farms by 17 June 2005, in the wake of the avian influenza. In exchange, the local inhabitants were offered HDB government housing packages, although they could choose to live on the island. As of 2012, there are only 38 people living on the island.[8]
Wikipedia: Pulau Ubin’s wooden house villages and wooden jetties, relaxed inhabitants, rich and preserved wildlife, abandoned quarries and plantations, and untouched nature make it the last witness of the old kampung Singapore that existed before modern industrial times and large-scale urban development.
Thanks, Singapore for teaching me a lot of paradoxical loads of experiences.
Holiday is real! 🤩
Wish you, Beloved,
Sent with white heart through the air
And short holiday
——————————————————————
Christmas falls on Sunday so it’s replaced with a day off on the following Monday. I take 2 days of special shut-down on 23 and 24 so…. It is a long weekend for 2021’s Christmas. Whoohoo!
As much as missing my family, I don’t have enough gut to go back to Indonesia which still applies 10-day quarantine in Jakarta while I still have to fly to Surabaya before meeting my mother.
“It’s fine, you stay safe there. Take good care of yourself,” said they. That’s enough as blessings to me.
So? Where to go?
Pulau Ubin by bike!
Al Fatihah to all celebrating Christmas and those enjoying holiday! 💕
Nature, Beloved,
Speaks to you about a path
Where wings be North Star
Which gives signs and directions
Only when you walk.
—————————————————————
Only when you know your destination, Beloved, and are willing to take the walk, all signs, symbols and directions become relevant.
Salaam…. 💝
Mirror on the wall,
I’m the prettiest of all?
It cracks up. Masks gone—
————————————————————-
Ah, weekends of mid December! Work is slowing down on several days. Weekends feel like starting on Friday morning. I have some longer time to talk to the mirror and find that I’m still there! A hidden innocent rascal nicely sitting behind layers of curtains
Masquerade on break!
🤡👻🤖👽😈👹👺🎭💩🎃👾🤠
🥰
May all beings be happy! 💝
The boughs touch the ground
Showing respect to nature,
Mother who loves all.
Fruits are ready to harvest
Everyday. Farmers’ blessings—
———————————————————-
One of those teaching me constant gratitude is my mother. When I share my problems, she will either tell me “We should be grateful that our problems are still solvable” or “We are still lucky that we are still given blessings when having problems” or “It is ok, someday they will understand”.
That lady is made of flexible rubber when hit by hard challenges. Nothing hurt her blessed heart. I’m lucky to be born by her. I guess God has sent her to teach me patience….
…. and at the same time to be patient. Hallow…. It takes patience to deal with patient people. I mean it!
Matur nuwun, Ibu. I love you. 💝
Air— warm, hot or cold
Glides through all cavities
Of bodies for life.
—————————————————————
I want to forget you for the rest of my life and in the next life and the next next next ones but these senses are too intelligent, able to capture the most minuscule amount of signs and symbols that you’re around.
Let me celebrate your noise everyday. Thank you for knocking on all senses doors.
Salaam…. 💝
Colours will fade away
At the front gate of
A new season,
Leaving beautiful memories
To the garden.
No regret, Beloved
If all are infused with love.
No right,
No wrong.
Only lessons,
And wisdom
Imprinted—
Cycle is short;
Life is forever.
Each of the pearls in a strand is perfect when it’s loose. And so is a cycle in your life—
If I owe you one cycle,
Beloved,
I’ll come back
With a bunch of fruits
Ready to harvest.
Ready to taste
By your own senses—
See you again,
Beloved.
Choose what seed you want me to grow.
—————————————————————-
Flowers losing petals is a natural phase before plants are harvested for the fruits, the bulbs or other parts. Or, the flowers are the ones harvested to experience falling petals before they dry out naturally. It’s an end of one cycle at the same time a start of another.
May all beings be happy.
Thanks for everything
Not only abundance, but
Also scarcity.
—————————————————————
Online work mode has made people think creatively to minimize boredom including inserting some fun through dress code in online meetings. This time thanksgiving. Yay!
I’ve read some history and the development of that tradition, not a fans though because I am raised a Javanese who is supposed to thank every day —every moment if possible— with whatever reason. If you don’t have reasons to be grateful, find one.
For being a human being. For being a female. For being one rascal in the family. For being a persistent colleague. For the abundance. For the scarcity. For being me now.
If it is still hard to thank for who you are, Beloved, just be you with the layers of fear, hope and awe.
Thank you! For everything 🐣
Secretly
You,
Obviously
You,
You here,
You there.
Damn!
You are everywhere.
I’m awake, remembering
You.
Asleep, dreaming of
You,
I’m alone, imagining about
You.
Among the crowd, getting attacked by
You.
These five senses recognise the very
You.
Why
You?
No reason why, it is just
You.
But where are
You?
So distant
Yet
So much close.
Oh
You….
————————————————————
🎼
David, Beloved,
Was Carrara’s waste without
Il Divino’s hands
Writing, panting— Comissioned
By those governing the time.
—————————————————————————————————-
14 Peaks: Nothing Is Impossible has given me good lessons and at the same time pleasing encouragement to continue being me this way.
The biggest lesson comes to me is a reminder: When the applause goes to a record breaker, who is supporting whom?
Samwise Gamgee has helped Frodo Baggins complete the quest to destroy The Ring in Tolkiens’ Middle Earth. Ron and Hermione is a core team behind Harry Potter. Huckleberry Finn might have been the greatest support to Tom Sawyer. Tonto to Lone Ranger…. It is Tenzing Norgay in Hillary Edmund’s phenomenal climbing, and he is a real not a fictional character.
This movie shows me more and more clearly that sherpas have honourably let the payers step on the mountain peaks when it comes the time for standing ovation to the project leaders who will be recorded as record breakers; while sherpas were actually leading at the front during climbing, the real first steppers of most if not all tracks before others.
The guides have managed what is even not yet seen by the guided— both risk and challenge, yet the guides never act Mr/Ms Know All because guides’ job is to guide not to show off. The guides bring the guided to victory.
🏔
Only real winners appreciate their supporters. Otherwise, they are only recorded false achievers in the other layers of reality.
Life is but pastime and game for those being sherpas. Which to display is about facets of the same polished rock.
May all beings be happy.
Green leaves and grasses
Blanket black soil with freshness.
Good food for rabbits—
————————————————————
Greenery is enjoyed through many ways. Today’s best is chewing the texture and tasting the fragrant freshness.
Year of Tiger is coming soon. Old rabbit should eat more wisely.
May all beings be happy. 💝
Lily bulbs come back
Among red leaves in autumn.
Second chance from Her—
—————————————————————-
What is second chance? Once again? Or again and again like lily bulbs that come back every autumn and bloom beautifully until forever ends?
Mother Nature has taught me that mistake doesn’t come with punishment; it comes with lesson to be a better human being, someone who has purer intention and clearer attention. She consistently brings messages about acceptance that no one will be perfect as imperfection is an included package to realise and/or materialise perfection. That welcoming the next good day is doing the best today. That if the next now called tomorrow is here, the second chance has welcome me to be a better me. A me that’s more me than before—
I remember my Kyoto trip in 2014, my first encounter with spider lily. Fascinated, I sat down on the grass for quite long time in front of a temple with my camera until a beautiful Japanese (old) lady stopped by me.
“Hana! Hana! Hana!” She said smiling, with her thumbs pointed to the lily then to my camera.
“Ya! Ya! Ya! Thank you! Beautiful flowers!”
It was a surprise for me. A moment with no preparation. A short act with no anticipation. She just went away with her wise old smile.
That lady was probably sent to me as a second chance to re-define what possibly a Japanese truly looks like as the previous week I didn’t have a good experience with another one in Nagano.
I won’t probably meet with her again, yet enough for me to know that when I’m that age, I’d like to be as friendly and warm as her. 💝
Thank you for everything that comes with second chance, even second chance after my second chance so that in the second second chance I realise that it is my second chance not to be missed.
Al-Fatihah for all those who miss the second chance and those who are waiting for a second chance.
Salaam….
Both pictures are borrowed from https://www.japanvisitor.com/japanese-culture/seasons/higanbana
Dear mango flowers,
Bloom when I’m home, have some fruits.
Let’s visit neighbours.
—————————————————————-
If you do good, your neighbours will be good, too. Really?
Not always. Sometimes however good you are, your neighbours will be not so good. Yet still do good, just give fewer mangoes to them.
Good discount should be given in some special occasions, right?
Hey, Neighbours! 🍀
Dry leaves fall or fly
Away from a tree, decay.
Absorbed by the tree—
———————————————————-
What will I tell the younger me if I meet her?
Be you, bravely.
Dream even bigger. No one can stop you without your permission.
One more thing…. You know more than you’ve ever thought, you just don’t see it clearly; adjust the view finder and open your very eyes!
So much love,
The older you 🐣
Time’s a messenger
Telling her what is waiting
In every milestone—
Her comrades, trees and water
Read the signs to reach the home.
—————————————————————————————
Some peoples are born laid-back with all the gifts from Mother Nature. Life make them realise nature is as tough as it is rich and so those peoples shape their bodies as hard as rock, their muscle wire, their bones iron, their mind clear water, their intention straight arrow. Time is the witness. Time is Messenger. Time will not betray human beings who work hard and pray.
I’m thankful to be born in a rich archipelago and re-born repeatedly among hardworking peoples.
Weekend, Weekend…. Washing, ironing, cooking— repeated milestones, be patient.
🦸🏻♀️
That you feel
Better,
Smarter,
Luckier,
Richer,
Prettier
Than others
Might
Not
Be
Self worth,
Beloved.
—————————————————————
Today’s discussion with some friends was about self worth. One head, one point of view—
My own understanding about self worth has evolved. Its turning point was in 2009 after a broken heart. World was ruined. Hope was (almost) zero. The worst was the way I was cut from the relationship; it made me feel of having no self worth. It was a time of emotionally shutting down like an un-charged computer; functional intellectually and physically but not emotionally— zombie in the making.
Dumbest young me!
I thought self worth was when I was do things better than others. Or, knowing more than others. Or, given a lot of things out of the blue as if winning lucky draws again and again. Gaining financial freedom and material things. Or feeling prettier than others (this one very seldom) at least prettier than Bob, my cat.
What is self worth in my system?
— self worth is about utilitarianism. Miriam Webster dictionary says utilitarianism is a doctrine that the useful is the good and that the determining consideration of right conductshould be the usefulness of its consequences; specifically a theory that the aim of action should be the largest possible balance of pleasure over pain or the greatest happiness of the greatest number.
If I’m good. So what? What have I done for my own self at the same time for others by being good, smart, lucky, financially independent?
If being good, smart, lucky, financially independent doesn’t bring benefits to others; where’s my worth? Is worth to self not enough, said someone. Not wrong; if the perspective of ‘self’ is about taking. In fact, life is always about giving and taking, or taking and giving.
“The best of people are those that bring most benefit to the rest of mankind,” said Islamic wisdom. It is equivalent with “urip iku urup” in Javanese wisdom.
Lo! No matter what people perceive about me as long as I do good to my own self and surrounding with good will, so be it.
May all beings be happy. 🪶
Not a chamomile.
A coatbuttons swaying wild,
Through seasons and winds—
Thousands of its seeds travel
To spread wisdom of the grass.
—————————————————————
Is there anything called limit in earning wisdom? No. Even to realise that a coatbuttons grass is a bearer of wisdom.
That good life doesn’t have to always look great and glamorous. It’s about realising that a tiny dust makes a universe a whole.
That beautiful life isn’t without challenges. Through the patience of accepting what’s now and consistently inspiring through little humble thing I know what’s being human.
That being strong isn’t about beating others in competitions. The real competition is about becoming a better version of myself every day in where I’m sitting.
That inspiration isn’t always when people call me successful. Being a success is making small decisions for myself that helps others grow at the same time leaves good vibes to myself for more little steps to a place called homely future.
Chamomile tea sipped by aristocrats in afternoon tea tastes elegant and upper class. Yet coatbuttons dancing in a disturbed lawn bear thousands of wisdom to ponder. It’s about choice of journey though, not right or wrong.
May all beings be happy.
Al Fatihah to celebrating souls on earth. 🙏🏼
This breeze blows gently
Sending a dowry of Life
From Love, sincerely.
—————————————————-
Breathe…. It’s what Life has shown that Love still wants to live.
Salaam. 🙏🏼
Coffee and cacao
Who won’t love their aroma?
Combined, it’s greater!
————————————————————-
After a full day, I decided to try a recipe that has invited me since forever. Steamed cake – coffee, cacao with a bit of cheese!
I’m not a fans of cheese and coffee but chocolate has been the love of my life since I didn’t even know chocolate was concocted from cacao seeds whose trees were grown in the front yard of Bu Har, the Art teacher in junior high school.
It’s always exciting to find sweet memories in bits of your work.
Tada!
A strand of white pearls
Harvested in the deep sea
Bedazzles her neck.
————————————————————
There is time when I regret of what’s done and nervous about what will happen. Why did I do that? I should have done this. What if I fail again? I am not good enough.
I used to think money was everything with happiness but I prove that money is the biggest illusion in life that I misunderstood. Now I consider money should be merely a tool, never a purpose. Yet I still think of what if my company stock price decreases? 😁
I used to look for happiness and protection in a relationship. With experiences I become strongly convinced that only a healthy relationship with the self can help me cope with problems; moreover, without healthy relation with my self any relationship with others won’t work well. Yet I still don’t heal from broken heart easily and still think whether or not I will meet someone I can share some simple happiness and shelter with.
I was between life and death situations more than once for some illness before, and so helpless about future. And gradually I realise that death can come anytime even when people are healthy. Yet I still hope I die when I let go of any confusion and live in clarity.
However, there is time when I know that only in the now I can accept everything. In the now I can shed tears with mixture of gratefulness for what’s breaking my heart and blessings of what’s boosting the quality of life. In the now I can smile just by seeing piling laundry waiting for ironing. In the now I can see the canvas is the door of self healing. In the now I can imagine sending a cake full of love for my loved ones who live in many different places, whom I cannot visit with many reasons. In the now I can see shades of real and true happiness in each and every experience from wake up to sleep.
Thank you for the now and now and now that form a strand of pearls called forever.
I live forever until the last now meets with the first now.
Al Fatihah to all of my loved ones across the oceans. I bless you happiness.
Salaam….
Jasmine is jasmine,
White, fragrant, tiny flower.
It sits in silence
Never bothered by roses
That stun eyes with the redness.
————————————————————
Trace back history
Deeply buried in the dark.
Strong trees start from roots.
————————————————————-
History of life. History of family. History of country. History of a nation. History of a continent. History of the world. History of human beings. History of the universe.
Whose stories?
History is written by the victors, said Winston Churchill. Is that right? It might be, politically.
She’d love to understand histories from those who have experienced life journey with heart and soul.
No right or wrong
May all beings be happy.
Lunar and field lights.
One beams, the other ones glare.
Runners run in peace.
—————————————————————
Harvest is to reap
What’s nurtured from the nature.
Good plans might not work.
————————————————————-
Last weekend was one of the merrier offs. Meet up with friends in different places + online conversation with best friends did draw interesting facts about how they apply parenting.
I’m against those who consider children as investment. This mindset is broadly believed where I was raised. This old concept has poorly discouraged many of us to grow as we are.
Many children from my time feel that their success should be to fulfil what their parents want as the investors who often time consider financial support is paramount, not to actually use their own ideal dreams to contribute to society as an individual with their unique ID and personality.
No, I don’t deny how important formal education is for modern human beings. And so financial support -normally from parents in my society- should be highly appreciated by those who enjoy the privilege. Yet the financial support should not make children become economically vulnerable against their parents.
In the other hand children must know parents -assumed as the major or primary support before living independently- get old and need support in their retirement and so those elderly should be well taken care of. This should be a form of respect and responsibility, not an abusively forced task.
Good parents should know it is a responsibility to prepare children to be responsible human beings; good children should know it is a responsibility to support parents in retirement time. 💝
It is not easy to deal with parents who don’t give room or give very thin chance to bridge gaps of many topics. One of the significant result is these children fail managing their own future plans: losing the chance to work in a dreamed place, missing the chance to live abroad, getting married with someone they don’t love or being single for not getting approval to get married with the loved ones, and so on and so forth. I’m one of those 😝
When one best friend said she wanted her son to be so and so but the son shown his rebel, I couldn’t resist myself to not say “Do you remember why you are now still there?”
She laughed and said,”Ok, ok thanks for reminding me. But you are not married. haven’t been a parent, haven’t had children that’s why you can say that easily…..! You would be disappointed if your children grow not up to your expectation. You would never want them to live below your standards. They should be the one materialising parents’ dreams that are missed. What would you say, my dear?”
Damn! She might be right!
However, how would parents expect children to be what the parents failed to be? Don’t they think children will fail to do so as well with the same style of parenting parents copy from grandparents (who failed in the first hand)? 😫
Please forgive me, best friend. Can’t always agree with but respect your stance. If I have children, I won’t lazily apply the dictatorship or transactional relationship. 👍🏽😘
I thank God to be single in this situation although I have smaller hope to “harvest my own next generation”. I’m quite happy that my brothers (and some crazy good friends) allow me to love their children as an open-minded aunt cum good friend when they need to have fun smart discussions. 🥰
May all beings be happy.
Covered with white sand,
A beach lies behind mountains.
The breeze that is missed—
—————————————————————
Unfolding map of South East Asia, getting travel gears with excitement
South East Asia, a truly loved place of mine where human beings are created humble and friendly in nature. Nature, please always make us that way. 💝
Salaam….
Rivers change their flows,
Meet salt, join tides, become sea
In an estuary.
—————————————————————
Eyes are a lagoon where tears are gliding through to the ocean of realities before evaporating then giving up what’s not serving anymore and turning grief into spirit to achieve the next milestones.
Soul is what’s peeping out through two windows, zooming in and out of what life presents to the self, finding the best view with accuracy and precision to gain clarity.
There won’t be anything wasted. All is flowing, without stopping. Like rivers that keep moving from soft to fast flows before finally joining a vast ever-moving force named the sea.
May all beings be happy. 💝
She’s dancing freely
Between needles of the rain.
Wounds in a bright soul—
—————————————————————
She loves rain as much as she adores rainy days. It reminds her of millions of water needles sharply in high speed falling on earth, different parts of earth.
Heart rain washing a rainforest is a blessing, flood in Jakarta tortures many stray animals and the underprivileged.
It’s not the pain, Beloved. It’s what’s left after suffering.
Are you still beautiful?
May all beings be happy.
Picture is borrowed from https://wallpaperaccess.com
rike jokanan 
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