When the dream has fallen down
Let it go.
Move on.
Though not wither, hope can dry out and burn itself down like forest in heat fire….
May all beings be happy.
graphs of my Universe
When the dream has fallen down
Let it go.
Move on.
Though not wither, hope can dry out and burn itself down like forest in heat fire….
May all beings be happy.
My dear Self,
You are not what you have.
You are what you do.
Oh dear Love,
Why do you keep reminding me to be one that is difficult to materialise?
Do I have another option?
My dear Self,
You have all possible options.
Be what you wanna be
But what you have should not define you.
Bloody hell, you Love….
But ok…. I will do.
May all beings be happy.

Ode To Beautiful Weekend
I can feel weekend
The thrill slithers on my back.
I can smell the weekend
The fragrance stabs my nostrils.
I can hear the weekend
The euphoria of wind whistling through the sliding door opening a jar.
I can touch the weekend
Its textures give me goosebumps of excitement.
And I can see the weekend
A fluffy nest on my bed with pillows under my feet and the greenery across my windows.
Weekend, you beautiful period
All senses are hugging you
With love and hope.
Weekend, I know you don’t last forever
You are just one seventh of the cycle,
Only a dwarf that ends the line,
Only one color in the bowing rainbow,
Only an end that starts another project.
Weekend, you are the true refresher though
That stops the billowing smoke from the top of my head,
That interrupts the intensity of hostile stalking of some friends,
That gives me space to shift my focus.
Dear Weekend,
Bring me Love in your next visit.
Pack your luggage and safe travel.
Me to Weekend – Aug. 2, 2020 / 08:57

September is the most romantic month. The feeling maybe comes because I was born in September. Or, there may be other reasons that haven’t emerged yet through my mind. The taste granted now is that September is romantic for me.
Anyway, why isn’t a question I want to deal with about this. Just can’t wait to meet September again. Although I cancelled the 2020 annual major holiday (I claim it every September), I still think it is gonna be a great time!
September, be my sweet anchor forever.
May all beings be happy
Singapore – Aug. 1, 2020 / 21:59
Not so much differs
Too much work or too much time.
Busy or lazy?
Singapore – July 31, 2020 / 08:45
—-
A pile of work can show whether you have a lot of work waiting or you have wasted time that so much work is left not done.
May all beings be happy.

To myself: I love you forever….
.
.
Sometimes it is more convincing to speak without showing who you really are.
Yet hiding self is suffocating,
And at the end
You might forget who you really are.
Look at the mirror then slowly unmask.
May all beings be happy.

I prefer bokeh.
My eyes stare, brain relaxes.
Focused on nothing.
—
I just wanna sleep, blurring my memories in the slumberland and dream sweet about you…. Have a good vibe, Universe!
May all beings be happy.
Beauty is Nature
Married to Culture. Others?
All failed engagement—
Yet you’ll find culture too shy
And wrapped in modernity.
Singapore – Jul. 3, 2020 / 0:48
—
I miss going someplace, any place where land is covered with nature mixed with friendly people….
May all beings be happy.

Slowing down footsteps
Pace along an ancient route.
Trace back your soul path.
Now here
—
Thought sometimes gets puzzled why thing happens to the Self, while logically she has made best possible efforts to control it not to emerge into events. At times emotions pour like heavy rain or they numb all nerves.
Then the Self realises that all is about tracing back the soul path: paying one’s karma, optimising one’s dharma.
Dear, Self.
You’d better pass major lessons in the current life. You shouldn’t want to fail the same lessons: acting lame or repeatedly meeting lame spirits wrapped in different physical planes, or both at the same time.
Dear, Beloved.
If it is not done,
Don’t let me slip from Your hands.
May all beings be happy….

Some dream grow so fast,
Move on a lane full of pain–
Like a lil bamboo?
Singapore – Jun. 6, 2020 / 11:19
What is one of the most delicious food in the world?
Rendang!
People think it is of Malaysia original. NO, it is not. It is originally an Indonesian food, more exactly from Padang, a place situated in Sumatera. Is it that important to debate where food is coming from? Not at all…. Yet I think I would be gracefully proud to tell people that I’m successful to cook one of the most delicious food from my own country rather than that from neighbouring country.
I present this rendang to all Muslim wherever you are…. Eid Mubarak!
All my cooking is always started with “Browse the Net, dear Self!”

Let me boast my knowledge about spices and the rest of the “squad”: nutmeg (powder), turmeric leaf, cumin seed, coriander seed, cloves, lemongrass (I love this piece), tamarind, ginger, galangal, kefir lime leaves, red chilli (small and big ones), shallot, garlic, coconut milk (instant though).


I normally use traditional stone pestle and mortar but this high quantity of herbs will hurt my hands so allow me to use the food processor. Such a sin haha






My rendang is accompanying me in this Eid — no home country visiting this year, no gathering in the Embassy, no friends will be visiting due to the Gov policy of social distancing. It is fine. Hope this pandemic is over immediately and leaving good memory for the rest of my life….
May all beings be happy….
Singapore – May 23, 2020 / 12:08am
Celebrate your day!
Every day! For all blessings
Poured down to your life.
Singapore – May 5, 2020 / 00:52
—-
Dear Self,
Every day is counted blessing, none of which is unworthy even if you experience unworthiness.
Never underestimate small detail. A piece of missing puzzle will break a big picture.
Thanks for all the blessed days, dear Life!
May all beings be happy. 🥰
What is new normal?
A set of taboos maybe
Or ancient practice—
Singapore – May 1, 2020 / 20:00
—
I feel an acceptable level of my new normals after two months of flexible work arrangement and no business trip. I wake up almost at the same time everyday – in my old normal I woke up in different time almost everyday because either of my flight, the pick up time or time zones.
I did my groceries very rarely; now regularly and enjoyably! Oh my god, I feel like going picnic in fact just going to either wet market or to Cold Storage 😁
I used to cook only at the weekend or holiday – sometimes not even because I would prefer going to my home country for short trips to meet my family and friends; now I cook literally every single day and I love it!
I did my laundry sometimes if it wasn’t done at the hotel; but now I handwash my clothes twice a week – big fabric like towels and bedsheet will still be thrown to washing machine.
I used to wear casual or sometimes dress for work; now I wear pyjamas, rompers or even just underwear when working as long as there is no conference call for the day!
And my plants have become happier – blooming orchids and growing rhizomes. 🥰
If these are new normals, would it be my normal even after the outbreak is cured? Might not all be….
I wish I have a better life after this circuit breaker and can keep some of the good and enjoyable things as my forever normal.
May all beings be happy.
Staying home longer
Is such a bless. She’s happy.
Thanks, trip postponement.
Singapore – March 11, 2020 / 7:50am
—
My March will be with less packing and unpacking. Two trips to Japan have been postponed until situation is well settled. It means a lot to me: walking more, cooking more, going to gym more, meet-up more, sketching more, reading more, all is more except eating – no eating more!
Sometimes others’ hell can be someone else’s heaven. I’m not happy with the COVID-19 but honestly it has blessed me with awareness of self health and more time to stay home. 🥰
I pray that the situation will be well settled soon.
May all beings be happy….
Wet arrows pour down
To earth, sow blessings and love.
Green and gold grows up.
Ipoh – April 23, 2018 – 22:55

I’m a frequent flyer, constantly the whole year. I’ve got good frequent flyer points of course but that’s not what I want to share about my flight.
It is how I deal with it is more interesting…. Or annoying?
I used to be an early riser, now I wake up just on time without having spare time to step my feet on the floor gracefully. I just jump up from the bed and rush to the restroom then prepare my next schedule.
With such a hurry, I forget something sometimes. Sometimes is not a good expression — so, let’s say seldom. No, just take sometimes ‘coz seldom means slightly better quality — it’s not though.
Ok, I forget what?
I have some experience when I forget to wear shoes to fly out of Singapore. For vacation, no shoes is ok except for the cold weather but for business trip…. You don’t have a choice but wearing shoes and if you forget your shoes, you’ve gotta buy them or borrow them from heaven knows who and heaven knows it is shoe shop.
Once I forgot bringing shoes and I decided to buy a pair of sneakers that I now have to wear. It was a good chance for me to know that pig skin can be made for shoes. Pigskin is much softer for suede shoes. With the various colours offered, I had no doubt to buy one pair until the shopkeeper said to me “Ma’am, they are made of pig skin. I suggest you not buy them, just to be safe ‘coz we are Muslim”. What?! Then I bought a pair of polyester-base sneakers. Now I think I should have bought the pigskin thing!
Then another time I forgot to bring shoes again. No choice (again), I had to buy a new pair. This time I went to a shoe shop where many leather base shoes are displayed. No pigskin, no sneakers, only boots and nicely-cut female shoes and sandals. I decided to buy loafers that look very elegant.
I wore them for a two-day meeting and an occasion. I was so happy…. Until I realised that I traveled for a business over the weekend with two different agenda: one for in-house meeting and the other one after the weekend for a field tour. A field tour! Then I couldn’t wear my new shoes. Should I buy another pair again?
Lesson learned: never forget. Never forget your shoes. Never forget your trip purpose. One important thing: never forget that you are forgetful now.
Thanks, God for my being forgetful. I’m happy that I’m forgetful so I can just say “I’m sorry I forgot.” Gosh! Now I know why people forgetting is given allowance to skip some duties.
Whoa! I left my toiletries in the hotel room. I forgot again!
Thanks again, God!
Jakarta – April 22, 2018 – 07:00

Picture borrowed from https://m.ebay.com/itm/Mens-Florsheim-Black-Leather-Tassel-Slip-on-Loafer-Shoes-Sz-7-1-2-D-fw226-/152823959836?_mwBanner=1
How do you thank Life–
For what you are? Find a way.
And stick to its plan.
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Temasek – October 27, 2017 – 00:40 (sakdurunge adus)
Kutabur debu cahaya
Bersama salam dan langkahku
Demi jejak kemanusiaan
Bagi seluruh isi alam.
Berurai air-mata….
Sungai-sungai sebagai urat-urat darah
Yang mulai tersumbat,
Menyempit,
Buntu…. Samudera pun kehilangan tuah dan birunya.
Tersedak Ibu Gaia terbatuk-batuk, bersedih melihat anak-anaknya tiada berhati.
Duh Gusti,
Ampunilah aku
Yang tak mampu membantu titik-titik mungil bercahaya terkungkung rantai dan kerangkeng.
Letih dan terluka
Batin dan badannya.
Duh Gusti,
Merdekakan kami.
Aku dan titik-titik mungil bercahaya itu.
Merdekakan inti hidup kami.
Sehingga bahagia walau kami dihela hingga pertolonganMu tiba.
Sehingga ikhlash walau kami dipaksa hingga kehendakMu tiba.
Wahai, titik-titik mungil bercahaya….
Kuseru doa dan belai mesra.
Salamku salam ruhani yang akan membungkusmu dengan kekebalan
Dari segala derita.
Kuatkan. Murnikan. Tataplah langit seperti kutatap ia.
Kudekap Ibu Gaia,
Kuhembuskan debu cahaya
Dan titik-titik cahaya itu berpendar, melebar dan merayakan kebahagiaan.
Salamku salam ruhani
Wahai titik-titik mungil dalam dekapan.
Puisi ini kupersembahkan bagi para satwa yang didera kekejaman atas nama kesejahteraan manusia. Terkirim bagimu kekuatan dan kemuliaan selamanya. Sayangku….
Ibu Gaia, teriring doa untukmu jua….
Salaamun qaulammirrabbirrahiem….

Temasek – August 12, 2017 – 02:59
I travel to live
To revive the life and place
With my soul greeting.
Roots, trunks, leaves, flowers tell me:
“Your footsteps leave light and scent”.

Temasek – August 10, 2017 – 22:44
Picture borrowed from: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/525373112761812546/
In a rough dark sea
She is diving all alone.
Tridacnas await.
Are you ready? At the end of an abyss you’ll see a beauty beyond description.
Picture borrowed from this link, you can also learn what is Tridacna in it. Thank you! http://www.advancedaquarist.com/2016/1/aafeature
Or, watch below video
Temasek – April 1, 2017 – 22:35
When I was 12 years old (I hope I remember that age correctly), I imagined of having a small cabin to live with my four best friends: Rosi, Ana, Nana, Nanik.
Then at the age of 22 I want to have a big two-storey house with luxurious furniture where I can welcome friends to chat things.
Getting older, around 35 I just wanted to have a house. Just a house, any kind of house as I was so tired of renting rooms. And, thanks God I bought a tiny home near river bank. A small house with two bedroom, enough for me an my cat to live in. It has a small garden to the right side of it – small, really small full with sand for neighborhood cats to poo and play. It has free walls inside for my orchids to hang…. And the front wall for my wijayakusuma to bloom happily. And, it has comfortable space for friends and family to stay overnight or just pay a short visit.
I am so thankful for what I am given in my life. I hope I still have a chance to share more with all my frineds and family and all animals around me.
Light is coiling around me, praying for the best.
My house is there to pray for me…. I’m here somewhere praying for my house.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you….

Erawan, Bangkok – March 16, 2017 – 22:16
Her head cracked of sun.
Water boiled, blown by cool breeze —
Golden Triangle
Temasek – September 19, 2016 – 11:30pm

Picture borrowed from http://www.fnetravel.com/english/chiangraihotels/anantara-resort-and-spa-golden-triangle.html
40 days ago our dear cat lady, Greek went across the bridge and today we are remembering her being part of us.
She was such a beauty, dignity yet rebel and free soul. Oh yeah, free soul she was! She would hunt anytime she wanted and brought the hunted to us as gifts: grasshopper, flies, dragonflies, lizard, birds name it she would be proud of her hunting skill.
Once we had a guest with one teenager who was trying to protect the hunted bird – the bird was still alive, very weak and desperate – our guest freed the bird and Greek was in rage! She didn’t attack but she wouldn’t stop wandering around the house shouting until my Mother took the tiny cat to her hugs. She was calming in my mother’s hands.
Greek was such a love to all of us. Everybody poured her with abundant love and care. My Brother would always ask “Where is Greek?” everytime he visited my mom. My nephews and nieces would have the same question.
But Greek wouldn’t love children. She was scared of those rascals’ shouting and cheering and jumping and being too excited. Then she would stay away the whole day giving up the food. She would be back when all those kids were gone. My mom would be worried….
Greek was an alarm clock for my Mother. She would wake her up especially for night prayer. She would kiss my Mother to wake her up. Failed with kisses, she would scratch my mother’s body. Failed with the scratches, she would step on my mother’s head with her soft meows. My mother would prepare food and pray accompanied by the tiny alarm clock.
Greek was also great sleeper. She would sleep when the rest of us worked!
And a great eater…. Pick great eater! She didn’t take not fresh food. All of her food must be fresh from the storage. She would not eat her own leftover. All must be new! And new it was for our beloved princess Greek.
Greek, too many things we save in our memory about her.
You are loved. You are remembered.
We know you leave us as you wished. You made the decision and we just felt the broken heart to say goodbye.
Greek, your graveyard is just some steps from our backdoor. We can visit you whenever we want. We first got so sad but you always came once in while making sure that we are ok and we now realize that you were leaving clean and happy.
Please send our loving regards to Bob, Grace, Greece, Greg, and all other beloved animals you meet and greet there across the rainbow bridge.
Please cut your worry. We are praying for your good. Please pray for us, too.
Now your friends are sitting in our porch Everyday but they don’t want to stay home like you. They come to have meal and sleep somewhere we don’t know. Please make sure they are fine, our angel…..
Greek, this is your 40th days leaving us. You will be our guiding light, won’t you?
Till we meet again, my dear. Love you soooooooo much!!! Warm regards from me, Ibu, Mbak Andri, Mbak Yuda, Mas Yogi and all…. The rainbow slides are ready….! Woohooo!












Yogyakarta – June 19, 2016 -10:30am
Sometimes love is just a weird feeling that bobs up and down in the consciousness…. Above the surface of emotion, I’ve missed a dog that is lying down under a wooden sofa spending his happy days, thanking Universe for the second chance….
Moppy, do you know that deep down in my heart your name is echoing against any possible walls, unlimited….
You are blessed….

How are you boy? I hope you are in good shape, though I know you are not perfectly shaped.
Do you know I miss you? Yes, I know you know I do….
Please be happy, count your days in joy before you decide to go across the bridge.
When you are ready to go, please whisper to me. Don’t say good bye, just say good start. Touch my heart with your warm love.
Moppy, you’ve been a good dog. Not that good but you don’t make a lot of complaints and you’ve strongly survived. A tough, stubborn dog you are. A real buddy in a low tide. You make us keep going.
Moppy, if we don’t have time to meet before you go — or before I go — please always remember I love you. I know you love me, too….
Moppy, you still refuse to be bathed? Gosh! Such a selfish dog 🙂
But that’s ok as long as you are clean…. You are wiped, right? Don’t say no! 🙂
Moppy, you’ve taught me a lot of things.
To be strong
To forgive
To accept the worst
To let go………………………………………………………………………………………..
To love
Thank you, Moppy….
I can’t stop loving you. Let’s exchange blessings through the wind….
Salaam….
Temasek – December 14, 2015 – 10:16pm
Silent moment,
Embracing you in a the dark of Light.
The bliss of knowing you
Has made this life perfectly joyous.
Hold on….
There is a rendezvous
Before you sail
Across the river of blessings
To the wholeness….
Love you as always….
TERHUBUNG
Seekor bulldog diberangus moncongnya, dituntun oleh seorang petugas keamanan bandara internasional Pudong, China. Dua orang petugas lainnya berjalan bersama mereka, pelan waspada….
Kenapa tiba-tiba hatiku trenyuh? Apakah sudah garis hidupku untuk mengalami perasaan sakit bilamana ada hewan yang dijadikan alat oleh manusia namun tidak diperlakukan secara alami? Anjing, kucing, ha master, marmut, sapi, kambing, ayam, burung, dll semua pernah menjadikanku sakit hingga air mata tak mudah dibendung. Sayatan jeritan hatiku melihat mereka dipulasara karena tak ada pilihan lain.
Dulu… Aku pernah berbahagia menginginkan menjadi murid Sulaiman sang raja dan nabi yang ahli bicara pada binatang namun kini yang bisa kulakukan adalah tersenyum kecut karena kenyataan sang nabi bahagia menjadi ahli bahasa binatang tidak selalu menjadikannya tenang, justru sebaliknya.
Aku jadi ingat kata-kata teman “A gift sometimes becomes a curse.” yang seakan terbukti.
Untuk menjadi ahli bahasa fauna kurasa belum tapi aku melihat tandanya yang sangat jelas. Bob Kucing, kucingku yang sekarang ku titipkan pada ibuku, telah menjadi bagian dari pembuktian itu. Aku berkomunikasi dengannya dengan baik walau kadang menyisakan kegilaan yang menggelikan. Namanya kucing kok diajak bicara ya meang-meong doang…. Tapi aku ngerti…
Ah namanya kegilaan biarlah dia berkelana di dalam relung jiwa dan deretan kalimatku saja, tak perlu pembuktian pada audiens…. Cukup kupelihara saja kepiluan ketika mengindera berita tentang makhluk bernama binatang yang disiksa dan tersiksa. Maafkan aku, aku hanya bisa memberikan berkat pada kalian.
Cinta kasihku memancar pada kalian…. Berbahagialah….
Bandara internasional Pudong
15 Juni 2013 – 10:00 pagi
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