Tag: blessings

I Miss Office

Poetic
Do you miss office
Where sadness is forgotten
And turned to life goal?

I was granted a 1-day access to my dear office and the feel was so great, almost like first day joining the company. The excitement was so real. I scanned the badge for the first time again since March when the circuit breaker was applied due to the pandemic. Thanks to a special task that I was allowed to work in office from 8am to 5:30pm.

Covid-19 counter measure is everywhere: notices, labels, stickers of social distancing, number of meeting participant in a room, no eating and meeting only, don’t use this seat, stand here around elevator doors and other doors where people possibly queue, temperature checking, barcode scanning, etc. It is so different as if entering a new place esp with some renovation going on and new products photos on the walls. Indeed refreshing and mood boosting after some months of distance from it.

Although I didn’t work at my work station this time, I didn’t miss the chance to visit the desk at a corner. A small desk with some small stuff, vase for flowers or plants, hello kitty to hug when it is too cold, a plaque from the leader, and a cape to wrap the body (also when it is cold).

I wish to be back to office. Early next year? Not sure but staying one day there has been a good time that gives me reasons to stay excited about humble life.

May all beings be happy.

Remember Her

Learning, This Person, Those People

Relationship pattern changes over time and so does the way children relate with their parents. Although we are far away from each other, always remember the precious role of our parents especially mother. Oh anyway, I was closer to father. As he passed away, I become close to mother.

Dear Self, at least say hi through online chat or video call. Sending her the picture of our lunch would be a good sign that we are ok. Never let her worry about us, no matter what.

Self Love Or Selfish?

Poetic
Self love or selfish?
A striking question to me
From me about me.
The answer hangs up the call
Coming from behind my head.


—


Singapore, October 26, 2020 - 9:45pm

Arid Land, His Heart

Learning, Poetic
I never want to hurt myself, I just didn’t know who you are.
I got hurt by a cactus in a desert
Who pricks little fingers,
Who just want to touch this life softly,
Not hurting, not taking anything away.


Wounded, I decided to blame stupidity:
Why did I have to have to have to have to have to just touch cacti? I should have left that arid land long before I touched a prickly spirit.


A delayed regret is less important than a lesson learned but it always gives a story the most significant pivot.


Now
I’ll just admire from here
From where I stand
With millions of prayers
For a secret journey.
Yet I know you are a ghost days and nights.


Someday when I pour down the rain,
You’ll know.
Love is as sweet as water in drought—
Maybe—
If it is not late....

May all beings be happy.

Stiff Neck No More?

Poetic
Buckwheat hull pillow
Reduces stiff neck. If not,
A true marketer!

I couldn’t stand stiff neck anymore and decided to change my pillow into buckwheat hull. Once I tried one prominent brand but it felt too high (don’t like thick pillow) and it ended up stored on the rack.

Sobakawa pillow seems to be a very promising cure. Let’s wait if it really works, or the marketing just works.

May all beings be happy.

Who Is Your Best Friend?

Poetic

Who is your best friend?
MacBook, iPad or iPhone?
Internet it is!

I can’t deny my % of interaction with outside of my body recently is through machines activated by Internet. Hope 2021 will bring the “real life” back to normal: when I do the job normally meeting people kindly at the same time evaluating honestly, when I can travel to home country to meet good friends and to favourite countries to absorb good energy, when I can smile to others without waving hand because of wearing face mask, when eating out is not limited except by the operation hours not by physical distancing, when things are natural.

‘m still happy though as Life has given so big a gift every now and then. I have family who love me and friends who accompany me in high and low. I work in a company that takes care of me very very well. All with the Beloved’s bless and love

So, I am still ok to be MacBooks, iPad and iPhone’s best friend for the next some months.

May all beings be happy.

May All Beings Be Happy

Learning

People who treat other people improperly will do it to animals. It’s in the blood. And so I never trust those who are not nice either to their own kind and/or to animals.

I have met people —they look like nice and respectable ones— who abuse others physically, verbally and/or emotionally from torturing to humiliating, underestimating up to ignoring. I’m sure those will do what they do to animals, too.

May all beings be happy.

Looking In To Self – haiku

Learning

Your self perception
Doesn’t represent true you.
So is self portrait.

10% of self portrait hasn’t even captured the spirit of the person being painted. It is either a failure of technique or absence of realism talent. Or both?

May all beings be happy.

Take A Break – haiku

Learning
What does Friday bring?
Laundry, canvas, wok and pan
Wrapped in a good mood.

My stubborn headache and stiff neck suddenly vanished this evening….


I naturally love my job and love it even more every day with the space between two weeks!

May all beings be happy.

The Entertaining Uncle Roger

Learning

I felt a bit sick today and kind of needed a big refresher before sleeping. I decided to revisit a YouTube video to just get some laughter or at least generous grinning.

Enjoy!

Slowing Down – haiku

Poetic

The steps have slowed down,
Taking a deep breath, exhaled.
She's feeling the now.

Is 24 hours enough? Everybody has the same length of time everyday but not everyone is able to appreciate how short it passes without being enjoyed and experienced….

Forgive me, dear Self for making you so dragged with all the fast-paced seconds unaware of what you are really doing. Now take a deep breath and feel the now…. There will be a day, a very long day of 24 hours but feel like it is a forever joy!

I think I am mad…. Talking to myself as if I am two or three or many…. Like Trahald in The Lord of The Rings. No worry, everybody has Trahald, Bilbo Baggin, Frodo, Samwise, Legolas, Gandalf, Arwen, Elrond, Eowyn, Gimli, urukhai, …. Take time to feel each of their presence, but don’t be one of them all the time. Just be yourself with some dose of all of them at the right time by slowing down….

May all beings be happy.

Gandalf

Hungry Caterpillar

Learning, Poetic

Caterpillar feet
March on a twig. Oops! They flip.
Scary acrobat!
It looks up to the blue skies,
Prepares to cocoon itself.

—

Butterfly is never really born. It is a natural breakthrough after the hungry caterpillar is willing to go fasting and liquidize itself in seclusion. When it is time, a butterfly comes into being.

You might be not a colourful pretty butterfly but cocooning should have taught you that your present being is the output of a long resting period after such a long euphoric period of being a hungry caterpillar. The euphoric being is gone, replaced by a winged soft being flying and dancing celebrating the moving air around its body.

Your wings might be just pitch black but they are the result of how sincere you are in a transformative sleep hanging in a weak twig, without knowing if you’ll be slapped down when the twig is broken, without knowing that you’ll be aborted because of the wet, without knowing that the end is the end or a transition point. You just don’t know but you accept your not knowing.

You might not be as pretty as the most beautiful butterfly out there but…. You’ve gone through the same quality of cycle – not less not more. Thanks to fair Mother Nature.

To be “born” winged, fly, help the flowers pollinate before fruition and magically create graceful move with super powerful effect….

Don’t be upset for being a flipping hungry caterpillar’ coz when you’re transformed, your flapping wings can blow a typhoon!

May all caterpillars be happy…..

Rike Jo

Signs – ranting

Learning, Poetic

When sign means nothing,

She’s maybe illiterate

Or dead desperate.


—


I had a conversation with a good friend, the topic was “sign”. This particular friend cannot read most of non verbal signs and hints from her spouse clearly. What her spouse shows non verbally won’t trigger any curiosity from her; except when he expresses it verbally then she will understand. Facial gestures, body language, more seriously mental vibration won’t do her any ring anymore.


I thought it was strange as a couple should be able “to read” each other’s feeling or idea with a blink of an eye! At least that’s my ideal couple goal.


Then after a while I can relate to what has happened to me.


I’ve been living away from family for more than 25 years; the 7 of which I’ve lived totally home alone (cats and other pets not counted). And that 7-year period is when I think I’ve lost the ability to read what my family is trying to communicate to me. We either don’t understand “the language” or we just can’t accept “the reasoning”. When it comes to language, I feel that our ability to read kinds of personal or cultural gestures have diminished either with my ignorance to their loving and caring behaviour or with their insensitivity to my practicality and logical thinking. We just don’t know how to match things in many occasions and usually we’ll just tolerate each other by saying “no worry, as long as you are happy and healthy”.


When I asked what happened to my friend and her spouse, she said “I just don’t know what language I should use to communicate with him”. Hmm exactly what I experience with my mother and siblings.


“Why don’t you try guessing whatever you see from him? Just to show that you care?”


“I’ve tried but it looks unnatural. He asked me why I did weird questioning and guessing.”


“It is ok, unnatural at the beginning but will be natural when you find the click”.


“We won’t find a click anymore. We are not happy and not meant to be.”


Eh?


At that point I couldn’t say anything. I think she is not illiterate, she’s seriously desperate.


Gosh! Life is a mystery! We, her close circle have always thought they’re the happiest and I’m the lonely. Now I think it is time to be thankful just for a minute to be happier even than the happiest.


May all beings be happy…..

Complete or Complex? – ranting

Learning

Life is a complete journey. You’re the driver, passenger, the road, the vehicle, the destination and the source!

That’s not complete, that’s complicated or even complex.

Dear Self, it doesn’t matter though that the understanding of the complexity isn’t coming yet.

You may think you’re just a driver, dear Self. But why thinking you’re a driver if you don’t even think of direction?

You may think you’re merely a passenger. Why thinking you’re that if you are so busy directing your life to certain direction. Only driver minds about direction.

You’re the road ‘coz you’re always saying you’re tracing back your DNA. You claim that you try to understand yourself, to follow your line…. You’re the road and route itself.

The vehicle?
Without your body, you won’t be able to move around! You. Are. Your. Own. Vehicle.
Note that!

The direction?
You always say everything is for your own good, for your own benefit…
You’re your own purpose. Direction.
Re-orient yourself!

The source?
Don’t worry, dear Self there is blown spirit given to you, from the Source.
So if you don’t think you’re the source, you at least contain some particle sparked or blown or splashed or however the way from the Source.

Hmm…. Love
So easy to fool around this humble Self to believe that life is a complete oops complex journey….

Take it easy….. Time to enjoy your corn with cheese, dear Self.

May all beings be happy

E8DA96CF-8A5F-41AE-AE86-E07CED086F94

Sunset – haiku

Learning, Poetic

She loves each sunset.
It throws her things to ponder,
About life knots.

Temasek – Aug. 30, 2020 / 23:54

—

Many people choose to live in houses facing the east where the Sun greets them in their mornings. The iconic sunrise is not only the representation of natural beauty but also the indication of value in dollars of the residence.

All my windows face west though, with no special consideration except that I pay cheaper rent for this small apartment. My friends said I should have chosen the other one with some dollars more to see the sunrise. I thought I made wrong choice but soon found that sunset isn’t less beautiful than the sunrise.

Sunset gives me warmth of the day. It waves me a hope to see the next day. It’s red, orange, yellow behind the spectrum of light to dark blue and oftentimes grey to pitch black has become my dear friend when I’m home.

I’ve been not only living but also working from home since March and seeing many sunsets with different combinations of colours and weathers.

In fine days sky gives me clearer definition of what sunset is like. Round burning circle slowly and quietly drowns into darkness, leaving the land a peaceful place and letting electricity take the turn.

In cloudy days I’ll ask the sky where he hides the giant fire ball. He says the ball is still burning behind him, moving to the same direction in the same orbit with relatively the same speed, just that it is knowing that certain days don’t need its presence for some reasons. Sun still sets but my eyes don’t witness it.

Sunset has taught me that life goes on whether we see it or not, hear it or not, discuss it or not, taste it or not, smell it or not: sense it or not. Sunset has taught me that the attention is human beings’ button of “what exists”. With or without that button, everything exists yet human beings think some don’t exists just because their button is off.

Sunset is truly a gift for me from the Universe. It is a present when I miss my beloved people, a lesson when I’m aware of who I am or I am not, a teaching when I’m enlightened, a button when I’m observant or ignorant and many other subjects depending on what state of emotions I’m in.

Sunset is a call to realise that nothing lasts forever and at the same time thing can be an eternal memory of yours as long as you wish it is.

Alamak…. I become so sentimental because of sunset….

Thanks much, Sunset for accompanying me for some minutes in my long-hour day. I know you travel to the west, please carry my hope to my love and send it back to me the next day through the sunrise in front of my east front door.

May all beings be happy….

86EC14AD-76EF-446B-9367-BF122ABD1EF9

See You Next Year – hungry mood

Learning

I would have been to Japan at least 5 times up to this month this year if Mr and Mrs Corona hadn’t come.

Upset? Slightly. Why? Coz I planned to go eating in some restaurants whose food has been shown by one of my YouTube subscribes, and all the plans have to be postponed.

Hey! It doesn’t matter, there is still next year. And in my life the next year is always better than previous  year.

See you, Japanese food! Serve me your best! Our rendezvous is gonna be amazing!

Been drooling watching the Deli Bali’s videos 🥰

Milk and Honey – smiling

Learning, Poetic

Ants under a book
Crawl about into a nook,
Escape from a look.

—

I’d been struggling with happy ants on my desk. A group of ants were nesting under a book and even after some effort they were stubbornly staying under that particular book.

I didn’t get it but now I do.

I lifted the book and moved it to another place and magically no ants came back. I put another book to where the “problematic spot” is in. No ant came back! Until now….

When I checked the book that attracted the happy ants, I found the title is “Milk and Honey”.

May all beings be happy 😜

F07009EA-88E6-42A9-8C98-EA0B48D9B351

Empty Talk of Friendship between Self & Love – ranting

Learning

There are times when you feel people pass by you igniting some fire inside of you. Oops! Not you, it is me. There are times when I feel people pass by me igniting some fire inside of me. And that day is ruined, work isn’t fun, chores aren’t fun, good movies become boring, good books become rubbish, many things become lousy.

This evening I looked at the face in the mirror, scrutinised the body line, touched the thinning hair and felt the throbbing core in the chest. Closing my eyes, those faces of people igniting my fire jumped and jolted out of my head…. And some inner songs are sung to the Self.

Dear Self,
All coming to you as Teachers with different what and how.
Some people come teaching with words.
Some others come teaching with actions.
Some others come teaching with emotions.
The others come teaching you with the combination of those.
You’ve gotta accept those people lightly ‘coz they are just Teachers.

Oh, Love
I don’t feel like having Teachers anymore.

Dear Self,
Then take them as Messengers.
All the words, actions and emotions are lines of messages, prophecies, justification, validation, rectification…. Or even judgement for you, on you, to you.
Just take them as Messengers and let them go freely and lightly. Don’t hold on to who they are. The messages and the way the messages are brought to you is more meaningful than the Messengers.
Let the Messengers go. They need to send messages to other human beings.

Oh, Love.
I know now.
My hair becomes grey and thinning because of the ugly voices.
My skin and flesh becomes flabby because of the cruel hands and feet.
My eyes and smiles become dull and gloomy because of the laughter and anger.
Those are all the reflections of my own deficiencies, not those Messengers’.
I care too much on who and whom and that has made me so tired like Heaven.

Dear Self.
Now that you know….

Oh, Love.
I don’t know

Dear Self.
But you said you know….

Oh, Love.
Let me revise. Now I know that I just need to see thing as it is, not adding assumption, perception and loading emotions….
That way I liberate myself.
That way I unlearn what have blinded me from the reality.
That way I accept things as they are.
That way I judge things neutral.
And that way I can live lightly.

Dear Self
Good!

Oh, Love.
Nothing is good or bad.

Dear Self.
You start to talk wise like me.

Oh, Love.
Aren’t I you?

Dear Self,
Stop.
Time to eat your fried tofu then sleep….

Oh, Love.
You are wise and know what I need….

—-

Note to Self: sometimes you don’t have to take life so heavily; otherwise, your head will explode before its due date. Eat then sleep! 😁

5783CADE-99E2-4DB7-83AD-94FB765815D9

Wither – music and lyric

Learning

When the dream has fallen down
Let it go.
Move on.

Though not wither, hope can dry out and burn itself down like forest in heat fire….

May all beings be happy.

Who Are You? – ranting

Learning, This Person

My dear Self,
You are not what you have.
You are what you do.

Oh dear Love,
Why do you keep reminding me to be one that is difficult to materialise?
Do I have another option?

My dear Self,
You have all possible options.
Be what you wanna be
But what you have should not define you.

Bloody hell, you Love….
But ok…. I will do.

May all beings be happy.

04BE0FBB-9A2E-48AD-B62E-B45563A92867

Ode To Beautiful Weekend

Learning, Poetic

Ode To Beautiful Weekend

I can feel weekend
The thrill slithers on my back.

I can smell the weekend
The fragrance stabs my nostrils.

I can hear the weekend
The euphoria of wind whistling through the sliding door opening a jar.

I can touch the weekend
Its textures give me goosebumps of excitement.

And I can see the weekend
A fluffy nest on my bed with pillows under my feet and the greenery across my windows.

Weekend, you beautiful period
All senses are hugging you
With love and hope.

Weekend, I know you don’t last forever
You are just one seventh of the cycle,
Only a dwarf that ends the line,
Only one color in the bowing rainbow,
Only an end that starts another project.

Weekend, you are the true refresher though
That stops the billowing smoke from the top of my head,
That interrupts the intensity of hostile stalking of some friends,
That gives me space to shift my focus.

Dear Weekend,
Bring me Love in your next visit.
Pack your luggage and safe travel.

Me to Weekend – Aug. 2, 2020 / 08:57

AD44BDBD-7FC2-4452-9E6F-77CE2BBC765F

September – ranting

Learning, Poetic

September is the most romantic month. The feeling maybe comes because I was born in September. Or, there may be other reasons that haven’t emerged yet through my mind. The taste granted now is that September is romantic for me.

Anyway, why isn’t a question I want to deal with about this. Just can’t wait to meet September again. Although I cancelled the 2020 annual major holiday (I claim it every September), I still think it is gonna be a great time!

September, be my sweet anchor forever.

May all beings be happy

Singapore – Aug. 1, 2020 / 21:59

Busy vs Lazy – haiku

Learning, Poetic

Not so much differs
Too much work or too much time.
Busy or lazy?

Singapore – July 31, 2020 / 08:45

—-

A pile of work can show whether you have a lot of work waiting or you have wasted time that so much work is left not done.

May all beings be happy.

 

A7E7BA96-6CD8-4566-82D2-5B3ACE16D2A5

Unmask

Learning, This Person

Sometimes it is more convincing to speak without showing who you really are.

Yet hiding self is suffocating,
And at the end
You might forget who you really are.

Look at the mirror then slowly unmask.

May all beings be happy.

 

0405F4CD-255D-423D-8429-CB912D42852A

I Prefer Bokeh – haiku

Learning, Poetic

I prefer bokeh.
My eyes stare, brain relaxes.
Focused on nothing.

—

I just wanna sleep, blurring my memories in the slumberland and dream sweet about you…. Have a good vibe, Universe!

May all beings be happy.

Beauty Is Nature – tanka

Learning, Map It!, Poetic

Beauty is Nature
Married to Culture. Others?
All failed engagement—
Yet you’ll find culture too shy
And wrapped in modernity.

Singapore – Jul. 3, 2020 / 0:48

—

I miss going someplace, any place where land is covered with nature mixed with friendly people….

May all beings be happy.

5E488EAC-40A5-4E66-AF8D-253D66C94468