Tag: hidup

Arid Land, His Heart

Learning, Poetic
I never want to hurt myself, I just didn’t know who you are.
I got hurt by a cactus in a desert
Who pricks little fingers,
Who just want to touch this life softly,
Not hurting, not taking anything away.


Wounded, I decided to blame stupidity:
Why did I have to have to have to have to have to just touch cacti? I should have left that arid land long before I touched a prickly spirit.


A delayed regret is less important than a lesson learned but it always gives a story the most significant pivot.


Now
I’ll just admire from here
From where I stand
With millions of prayers
For a secret journey.
Yet I know you are a ghost days and nights.


Someday when I pour down the rain,
You’ll know.
Love is as sweet as water in drought—
Maybe—
If it is not late....

May all beings be happy.

Blacky and Amie

Bob, Learning, love, Those People

I support animal lovers and rescuers by praying for them or when I’m able I’d like to donate or accompany them to take care of those animals. But honestly I mostly support them from a distance…. The lowest level of caring but the best I can.

About two weeks ago a friend of mine texted me to pray for Blacky, a little cutie pie that was suffering from vomitting after every meal of his. Blacky, a black-with-white-spots kitten was waiting for exchanging blessings with me.

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This is Blacky, when he was up and around.

Blacky was transported by his mommy named Amie by bus for about 3 hours. What a lovely journey for Blacky and Amie the mommy….! To get him cured. Vet said that Blacky suffered from kidney disfunction. Or, at least that was the result after some examination by the vet plus X-Ray.

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Blacky and mommy Amie

Mommy had to go home to Tangerang, Banten because she had to work. But Blacky ought to stay — he was exhausted and needed some rest because of Tangerang – Jakarta trip and his sickness. Then it was decided to put Blacky in an animal clinic in Kemang.

IMG_2884IMG_2888IMG_2887 Blacky with siblings — all those sweet creatures

Blacky was not getting better. He kept vomitting and decided to leave, he was departing to the land across beautiful ocean. On his last day he ate a little and got positive energy support from another friend of mine. But Blacky really wanted to leave. He was happy and still is now.

Blacky felt the love of mommy Amie and thanked the Universe for sending her to take care of him in his very short life span. He was serving himself as a cat and it was his best serviceat that time. He would love to serve a better role in his next span of life and the Universe already grants his wish.

He will be borne as a boy or a girl who gets so much love…. Namaste….
He will be borne as a boy or a girl who is raised by loving and caring parents…. Namaste.
He is blessed and giving blessings.

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Breastfed together to mommy cat

Thank you Blacky for being present in my life although we never met face to face…. I feel the love of yours and mommy Amie’s love.

Please be safe in your trip to your better future. Til we meet again….

Jalan Putri Hijau, Medan – October 2, 2015 – 12:23am

Frog – A Transformation

Bob, Learning

So many years that butterfly is a symbol of transformation has been ingrained in my blood. From egg to caterpillar to cocoon then beautiful winged soft insect has been a cycle from a tiny little nothing to flying colors.

What about a frog?

Egg (Amplexus) then tadpole to froglet then frog
Isn’t that a cycle of transformation, too?

Yes, it indeed is.

But… What beauty can we extract from being a frog? Wait! It’s way too early to say no quality in a frog.

Frog is a sign of Spring — when life begins. Frog sings very loudly, invigorating the air of night, welcoming Summer.

A frog is a froglet losing its tail. What is tail for a frog, he doesn’t need (to) tail anymore. A frog is mature enough to take its way without tail(gating). So, are you a frog or a froglet?

And, a frog is one independent evolved egg that is able in detaching itself from the cluster wrapping thousands of eggs and escaping from the fish and other water predators. Ohlala…. You are a successful individual when reaching frog phase.

A frog is a froglet transforming from a water body to live in both water and land and ready to breed. It represents someone able to find the core of reality — being a physical cum spiritual being. Both needs to be developed and maintained; they weave and knit together to generate “haute couture” in a life time of a developed spirit. Balaced Yin and Yang: This happens as part of a frog’s being, our being.

yin_yang_cats_by_solreina-d6kgspx

So, human being transforms not only like a butterfly but possibly also like a frog….

Which do you choose as your picturesque analogy? You choose.

It’s just a thought pouring down in the middle of the night before a short sleep welcoming a new day.

Screen Shot 2015-05-19 at 1.06.36 am

Singapura – May 19, 2015 – 1:07am

Rasa (versi Bahasa Indonesia)

Learning, love

Boleh saja merasa benar,
Karena perlu pijakan beryakin-diri menjalani hidupmu.
Tapi tak baik merasa benar sendiri
Karena Semesta saja berkembang kemana-mana….
Masak kebenaran mandheg membusuk?

Yah, namanya juga rasa….
Selama jadi manusia,
Tanggunglah siksanya.
Sementara napas sambung-menyambung,
Buatlah keputusan: mau mokhsa? Atau balik ke dunia?

heart-01

Gambar dipinjam dari http://globe-views.com/dreams/heart.html

Singapura – 10 April 2015 – 11:07 malam

Borrowed ID? (with a haiku)

Learning, love, Poetic, This Person

A sheet of paper:
Name, sex, birthdate, religion is —
Borrowed ID.

Above haiku is a reminder for this self.

Have you ever thought of why you are called with your name? That nhe name was given by parents. Ok, borrowed name from parents? Or, the nickname that your friends & you agreed to use….

Have you ever thought of why you become a female rather than male? From the Creator, you could not even choose – or you bargained before your birth to be one? How…ever, yours is a borrowed sex.

Birthdate wasn’t chosen by you. You might have negotiated – but not 100% your take. It is lent by this life to you. Birthdate is the opening of current life; there should be the closing, fellas….

Religion? Attached since your family want you to be? Or, your spouse wants you to be? Or, the society want you to be? Or, any other external party wants you to be? Another borrowed…..

Borrowed…. You’ll have to return them someday. Please take good care of them before the D-day.

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Temasek – March 1, 2015 – 11:15pm

To Be Just Right

Learning

There are a lot of things left behind the schedule if I talk about my life plan.

iStock_000016351137XSmall

http://www.globaldms.com/blog/bid/149727/Dodd-Frank-Act-Finds-Itself-Behind-Schedule

I plan to get married at 25 years old but happen to be single until 39. Plan to have a house by 30 but got it by 35. To have iPod, iPhone, iPad, MacBook as soon as they were launched but I could just got them all as one package two years ago — just right after I reached Singapore for a new job. To enjoy meditation years ago but being able to do it just three years ago. To do this and that, all with delay….

Apple-products

http://www.visionsforhr.com/2012/01/how-apple-changed-my-life/

But that’s life, to wait for things happen with real patience. When the time is just right, all will come. Needless to say, but like working on repeated actions requiring ergonomics, it takes good stance and poise to get all life plans done. Stance is focusing on priority, poise is doing the best.

Ergonomics

http://www.boattest.com/Resources/view_news.aspx?NewsID=2997

To be just right is a main goal of mine now. To be at the point of understanding that I can only plan and work on my plans without extremely targeting when and how I should reach the dream. Dreams will come true, we should believe — as part of flame to keep up good things. But when and how…. That is just right at the end of the tunnel, we can only see the light without seeing the details of it.

Ahhh…. I’ve been so much treating my life seriously. Time to enjoy every tap of my steps and every tick of my second…. All is well and it can never be enough to say “thanks”. Anyway…

…. Thanks for everything, my Universe….

Muar, Malaysia – September 21, 2014 – 7:36pm

Forgiveness

Bob, Learning, love

Everybody makes mistakes…..

Can I deny that I do? The only thing I can do is to be able to forgive myself for all mistakes I have done in my life so far.

This is not easy to forgive others and even much more difficult to forgive my own self who have committed mistakes – many – of which part are planned. I don’t want to talk about the planned mistakes. Let’s just talk about mistake that is just mistake…..

My father passed away just one day before I got home. I planned to see him after so long I left my house for work in Jakarta. I was in a hard time adapting the cruel capital city that was blessing me with my first job after graduating from university. I was a secretary in a small company by then. My boss was a very pious person that treated all employees very well but then his company was not big enough to make me enough-paid to buy ticket to pay homage to my parents. So…. I had to save money for almost one year and of course to take a “decent” leave. I call it “decent” because I was needed badly to support other departments so that I did not dare to file for a leave at any chosen time.

That is my biggest mistake, it was almost unforgivable. I cease blaming on my self after so many years….. I cried when I remembered how painful it was to be poor and not able to pay a visit to beloved father who was sick and dying….. And, probably he was missing me so much. Please forgive me, oh my own self….

Then it happened again just this year.

Bob, my cat son was sick. I should have been able to pay him a visit. The ticket was affordable for me. It was just because the time did not allow. It took a long hour from Singapore to my mom’s house. From Changi airport I have to fly to Surabaya which is no problem at all, but from Surabaya to my mom’s house it would take 5 hours and so I have to spare at least 24 hours for the travel. I did not have that much time at that time…..

So, I let him die without me around…. This is almost unforgivable, too. I was sinking below all roots, could not see the beautiful flowers of my life in which those beloved ones nurtured before…..

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Then….

I reconcile with my self.

What should I do? All is over.

My beloved father and son passed away when I was away. That might be what they wanted. They did not want me to see them die. They wanted me to just see how happy their life was when I was around.

They have always wanted me to commemorate their good days. They have always wanted me to celebrate our togetherness in a positive way. Like they have been saying to me “Be happy, Rike. We are always happy with you…. Celebrate our life with your good memories. Don’t cry for us. Smile for us. We will meet again in the next life.”

So then I tell myself softly that I should forgive my own self because my father and my son have forgiven me. They will never hate me just because I never touched their bodies before they were buried. Their souls have been surrounding me from then on, so they are never away because of being separated by the container called physical body.

Oye, Self….. Please cherish the love. Never forget that the soul can be communicated with even when the bodies are cremated or buried or decayed in unknown places….. Ask the souls to talk to you, listen to your explanation and apology, sincere apology.

It is never too late to realise.

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Soul is always here. In the same matrix and ready to mediate.

So, please use the time while you are awake. Tell them how much you love them, how strong we are all connected and how big the sorrow will be if the forgiveness is not shared…..

Quezon City – March 4, 2014 – 9:37pm

Light

life, love

My body is lighter, when I sleep…. I can fly to all places I want to go and meet with anybody I want to encounter with. As long as I sleep well, I would dream and only then I will remember what I dream when I wake up later. Image

I should let myself be light, even lighter so that I can gain whatever I want to. I travel in my good sleep. I greet my beloved ones in my good sleep. I just need to sleep well to dream and at the same time to realise my dream. Image

I believe my dream is as real as the reality when I am awake. My reality in awake state is when the body experiences all things in life. But in dream is when my soul lets my body take a rest and it goes by itself experiencing etheric reality…. So, no matter what I dream I would thank that in the name of God I get what my body has dreamt of in the day. Oh…. how light I am  now, sleepy…. Need some good sleep and sweet dream. Let me meet my Bob, my late father and any other beloved ones living in the world, in this matrix…. I am sorry I am actually chattering….. Sorry but I feel so light and want to sleep to realise my dream….

Image

YCK Rd – March 3, 2014 – 11:18pm

SUMPAH PEMUDA ???

Learning, love, Those People

Aku tak merasakan semangat Sumpah Pemuda tahun ini.

Seperti kehilangan api yang seharusnya meretih abadi. Bahkan bunyinya pun seperti tinggal tulisan kabur di tembok penuh coretan graffiti.

Kutilik lagi hatiku. Layu. Tak ada warna merah di sana. Putih pun tak kutemukan. Yang ada kelabu, pembusukan sistematis. aku tak sudi begini. Harus kuperangi kelabu hatiku. Harus kugubah lagu menjadikannya tumbuh kembali: merah, putih dan segala warna yang hidup.

Harus kuraih lagi
Harus kucipta jalan perjalananku
Bukan kau atau kau
Akulah pencipta hidupku!

Teks berikut diunduh dari wikipedia
Sumpah Pemuda versi orisinal

Pertama
Kami poetera dan poeteri Indonesia, mengakoe bertoempah darah jang satoe, tanah Indonesia.

Kedoewa
Kami poetera dan poeteri Indonesia, mengakoe berbangsa jang satoe, bangsa Indonesia.

Ketiga
Kami poetera dan poeteri Indonesia, mendjoendjoeng bahasa persatoean, bahasa Indonesia.

Sumpah Pemuda versi Ejaan Yang Disempurnakan

Pertama
Kami putra dan putri Indonesia, mengaku bertumpah darah yang satu, tanah air Indonesia.

Kedua
Kami putra dan putri Indonesia, mengaku berbangsa yang satu, bangsa Indonesia.

Ketiga
Kami putra dan putri Indonesia, menjunjung bahasa persatuan, bahasa Indonesia.

Sumpah Pemuda di rumah kecilku di bantaran Kali Cisadane

28 Oktober 2012 – 4:03 sore

YANG BERPASANGAN DALAM HIDUP

Learning

YANG BERPASANGAN DALAM HIDUPKU

Jika hidup ini penuh keajaiban maka

Semuanya ajaib

Tak ada satupun yang biasa saja

Dari hembusan nafas pertama hingga tarikan yang terakhir

Mana yang kau hargai lebih tinggi?

Seharusnya tak ada

Karena yang pertama setara dengan cinta ayah bunda

Yang terahir setara dengan cinta seluruh jiwa semesta

Mana yang lebih kau cari?

Keajaiban kelahiran?

Atau

Keajaiban kematian?

Atau

Keajaiban diantaranya?

Atau

Inginkah engkau mengganti keajaiban dengan kewajaran?

Maka

Mana yang kau cari?

Kewajaran kelahiran?

Atau

Kewajaran kematian?

Atau

Kewajaran diantaranya?

Hanya sepasang dalam kehidupanmu

Keajaiban yang wajar

Dan

Kewajaran yang ajaib

Hanya cukup bersiap untuk menyambutnya.

December 13, 2008 – 11:59pm