graphs of my Universe
Celebrate your day!
Every day! For all blessings
Poured down to your life.
Singapore – May 5, 2020 / 00:52
—-
Dear Self,
Every day is counted blessing, none of which is unworthy even if you experience unworthiness.
Never underestimate small detail. A piece of missing puzzle will break a big picture.
Thanks for all the blessed days, dear Life!
May all beings be happy. 🥰
What is new normal?
A set of taboos maybe
Or ancient practice—
Singapore – May 1, 2020 / 20:00
—
I feel an acceptable level of my new normals after two months of flexible work arrangement and no business trip. I wake up almost at the same time everyday – in my old normal I woke up in different time almost everyday because either of my flight, the pick up time or time zones.
I did my groceries very rarely; now regularly and enjoyably! Oh my god, I feel like going picnic in fact just going to either wet market or to Cold Storage 😁
I used to cook only at the weekend or holiday – sometimes not even because I would prefer going to my home country for short trips to meet my family and friends; now I cook literally every single day and I love it!
I did my laundry sometimes if it wasn’t done at the hotel; but now I handwash my clothes twice a week – big fabric like towels and bedsheet will still be thrown to washing machine.
I used to wear casual or sometimes dress for work; now I wear pyjamas, rompers or even just underwear when working as long as there is no conference call for the day!
And my plants have become happier – blooming orchids and growing rhizomes. 🥰
If these are new normals, would it be my normal even after the outbreak is cured? Might not all be….
I wish I have a better life after this circuit breaker and can keep some of the good and enjoyable things as my forever normal.
May all beings be happy.
None is left behind.
Humans, animals are saved—
Humanity served.
Here now, in my silent heart
—
Flood is everywhere in my beloved country (Indonesia) and rescuers are the physically busiest of all. The good things are getting better, not only humans but also animals are rescued. There shan’t be any to be left behind even those they call non human. Those that you love in your good time shall receive the same care in your bad time no matter who or what they are….
God bless all rescue units who have worked hard soaked in the flood to carry babies, children, women, old people and others underprivileged including animals pet or cattle. God bless them.
Anyone is functioned differently. Some are active on the field, some financing, some fixing the root causes, some whispering to the Universe to save all of us.
Sending love, prayer and whatever aid I can…. 💝
Incineration
Is open, ready to burn
Rubbish. All is well.
Singapore – December 31, 2019 / 20:40
—
New year again? 😼
Although a year is just an agreed cycle, it has always directed a human being (me) to (nervously) plan things – end of year feels like a Management System practice for me: reviewing all the goal, action, gap, errors, plan adjustment, take away and self-scolding of why-this-why-not-that. Of course I’ve failed in many corners and turns every single year. Umm…. It doesn’t matter, lovely Self. 😘
And taps on my shoulders are enough to celebrate some success. 😘
Learning from my stupidity, I decided to make 2020 an incineration. A central waste plant to destroy each and every memory and/or situation that doesn’t serve my journey anymore. Decluttering!
I have a long virtual list of those needing to be burnt! One of them could be YOU! 😁
Thank you, 2019 for the ride and lessons. You are loved, you are remembered. Rest In Peace.
Happy New Year 2020! Welcome, this new Self!
Health, Love, Stock Price!
I wish you are all blessed through your own blessings.
….. One more: God bless all animal rescuers on earth! 💝
A bowl of corn soup
Served for lunch without pepper—
Can’t be any better.
Singapore – December 27, 2019 / 21:00
—-
Mbak Sari cooks for me everyday during her stay and it makes my tummy full and happy. Today she made corn soup and I love it.
I remember years ago when I was a Uni student. My friend and I were “assigned” to take care of another friend who was hospitalised for long time while her parents lived in faraway island. Of course we didn’t have to cook for her as the hospital did but I can remember how difficult it was to convince her that all food was good and had to be finished so that she could get stronger and recuperated. Sometimes my friend would just tell us to eat the food that we refused.
Mbak Sari’s cooking is far from the taste of my friend’s hospital food. Mbak Sari’s is made perfectly with friendship love and care for me to recuperate soon.
Just 3 more days for her to stay…. Hope all her cookings do me good for those 3 days and I can get back to work completely up and around.
May all beings be happy.
💝
Before I know You,
My Dear. Before I know you,
I’ve loved the haiku.
Singapore – December 23, 2019 / 10:45am
—
Feeling painful and bored….
Hope days go by quickly
So that I can do things normally like doing household chores, writing haiku, drawing with pencils and working with MacBook or just speeding around on Brommie…..
I still Tell myself to be grateful for and love the boring days.
💝
Holiday season:
A knot in a rope acting
As connecting stop.
Shanghai – December 14, 2019 / 00:40
—-
There is always a space to halt before proceeding.
In a world of men
She mostly forgets to thank
For being woman.
Shanghai – December 12, 2019
—-
Why should we struggle to compete in a male dominated world? Why bother? Even when their logic doesn’t show they are logical, the men will always think they are more logical than women. So be it….
I want to be more relaxed, enjoying my privilege of being a woman. I realise I’ve given up many many things and I want to take them back!
It is time.
🎬
You are not alone.
Millions cry at the same time.
On different cause though—
Singapore – December 6, 2019 / 20:36
—
Dearest Nephews,
If you feel your problem is the most unbearable, it is hardly wrong. Yet yours won’t probably represent the most difficult ones.
Can you count how many people live on earth? All of them have issues – even worse, they have issues while they have no choice but living with those because of absence of resources and no help whatsoever.
And how many abused animals are there? Be thankful that you are not a karmic animal this time around. Or, maybe in next life if you are abusive to animals in present life. 😈
And how much abused the natural resources are? If you think they are not alive, you’d better think twice.
So don’t feel like you are the poorest human beings in the universe just because you can’t afford the latest version of PlayStation.
🥰
Ode to my Beloved
Please hear me saying
The words that sweep your sorrow.
I’m in love with you.
Please kiss the rosebuds
That will bloom at the next dawn,
Opening new day.
Please touch the dewdrops
For me. Can you feel the love
When the water bursts?
Please close your eyes now.
Look at the Sun in my heart.
Do you see a You?
Please taste through my Soul.
What color do you find there?
It does remain true.
Somewhere on Nov. 7 / 12:00 (a throwback to embrace a frozen heart)
Love is that bringing us to the now either with the five senses or the sixth.
Love is that neutralising past & future into lessons & hopes.
What can be better than to be you, my Beloved?
If being you feels annoying or painful, do remember that you were born to the world welcome by a mother’s love, a father’s pride, a family’s cheer and unlimited future.
So, love yourself.
Only by loving yourself you can clear the blocked path.
Namaste
When mind is set free,
I want to live forever
As long as with you.
Singapore – long weekend of Deepavali Day 2019
—
King of Swords and Queen of Swords turned to King of Wands and Queen of Wands after stumbled by The Tower. From icy cold to passionately loving characters
Amazing! Ramblin Mike’s cards were open so “coincidently” magical. But I believe nothing is coincident.
End of this long weekend has got a nice closure of a bitter wound that gradually turns into a sweet journey, even if having to wait for an unknown shadow of a you. Just with a zodiac reading — that I used to underestimate :-p
Lesson learnt: Don’t underestimate a small talk, it can change a cold heart and angry mind of Maleficent into a warm heart and liberating mind of Nala of The Lion King.
Useful links: My Lion King and Maleficent
Wanna see Ramblin Mike’s zodiac reading? Enjoy.
Shopping list failure’s
None of the items are shopped.
Impulsive buyer—
—
Have you ever listed all that you need to buy; but ended up buying things not even in the list. The wallet is thinner but the list is not shorter. Not again….
Blame the bookstore! Aio…
I’d like to thank to this link The Six Signs of Impulsive Buying for the picture 🙂
No need to tell them
That your heart bleeds dry of Love.
Theirs might have bled, too.
Here now with myself
Sometimes we cry in the dark alone because of repeated broken heart. Sometimes you just wanna leave, run somewhere where no hurt can be felt. Don’t! Just stay!
And don’t blame on others that you think have broken your heart. No. The heart is yours to embrace, to love, to fix, to regrow…. You can do it. Don’t tell them how suffering you are because they might suffer at the same level, or even worse.
Just pray…
That we all will value the Love better and never break any heart anymore,
Especially our own heart.
Salaam for all of you who love your heart. Take care.
The link below is where I borrow the picture from, it is a very beautiful writing about heart. The Most Beautiful Heart
https://madamsabi.wordpress.com/2014/08/24/the-most-beautiful-heart/
A cute conversation in a weekend happened when two besties missed each other. The convo went well until a topic came up.
Friend 1: What is worse than being rejected?
Friend 2: What is worse than being rejected?
Friend 1: Being ignored.
Friend 2: Are you teasing me? I’ve known it from the beginning.
Friend 1: Why did you let yourself be ignored then? You’re doomed. What a stupid move.
Friend 2: I didn’t prepare ignorance, I prepared rejection. But I learnt my lesson.
Friend 1: Lesson? What subject? (might be saying while smirking)
Friend 2: Distance-speed-time formula (whatever one wanted to say)
Friend 1: Hmm…. Seems that you already master it now.
Friend 2: Pretty much.
Friend 1: So?
Friend 2: So what?!
Friend 1: Oops. Sorry. You learnt your lesson, I know. Don’t trust that type of subject. Don’t be naive ever again !@#$%^&*()_+!
Friend 2: !@#$%^&*()_+!
Then both laughed together. That’s what friends are for – tasting each other’s bitterness, ridiculing each other’s foolishness and throwing worst wisdom to each other’s nose.
Through the FaceTime audio
Thank you for the picture to: https://www.macworld.co.uk/how-to/iphone/how-facetime-iphone-3583186/
Cornucopia,
The abundance prepares for
The masked-off: new self.
Singapore – October 16, 2019 / 21:39
2019 has opened an extraordinary road of becoming the whole me. Many major lessons are learnt here.
Previous me always thought that things were between good and bad, right and wrong, happy and sad, strong and weak, one extreme and the other extreme, BLACK & WHITE. It was too much and I hold it no more.
What’s coming is lots of love in myself to myself and the abundance to share — not solely about gold and coins.
Abundance is about colors that make life vibrant howsoever my potential has been tampered.
Abundance is about clarity that creates enough space for myself (and so others) to contemplate whether the situation is uplifting or not– the keyword is uplifting, not favorable or superior. If not uplifting, either has the right to walk away from the situation with respect. Without respect, the situation has failed to be a station to heal, to nurture, to expand and to liberate each other.
Abundance means enjoying life while sharing it with others. Sense of abundance can only be manifested with sharing. You share what you spare.
Abundance means living the life to the fullest. Only with the awareness of abundance human being can grab the reality of abundance. If you feel empty, you won’t care to share.
Cornucopia
A hollow horn of lots of everything that will rot if the holder keeps it with herself.
So dear, Self. Don’t let anything get rotten through this journey. Love yourself and share the good things wholeheartedly.
My Beloved, I’m grateful for the abundance and the least my feeling of abundance.
I can’t be more grateful to You for sparing me this 2019.
I am feeling loved.
Useful link 1: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cornucopia
Useful link 2 & source pictures: https://www.psychics.com/blog/words-mythology-pt-v-cornucopia/
The foggy windows
Frame my morning’s first view.
It’s amazing day.
Temasek – October 3, 2019 / 21:07
—
My windows facing the reservoir have been glorious frames of all my morning views when I’m not away from home. No matter what mood fills my emotion, the windows welcome me with the same stillness. They are good friends with haze, rain, sun, wind while standing before me nicely with protection. Whether it is a bright day or a gloomy one, they are always successful to drag me to look out to and beyond them and say “Thanks, Life for the amazing day.”
A day without gratitude is like heart without its beat
May all beings be happy….
When I was 12 years old (I hope I remember that age correctly), I imagined of having a small cabin to live with my four best friends: Rosi, Ana, Nana, Nanik.
Then at the age of 22 I want to have a big two-storey house with luxurious furniture where I can welcome friends to chat things.
Getting older, around 35 I just wanted to have a house. Just a house, any kind of house as I was so tired of renting rooms. And, thanks God I bought a tiny home near river bank. A small house with two bedroom, enough for me an my cat to live in. It has a small garden to the right side of it – small, really small full with sand for neighborhood cats to poo and play. It has free walls inside for my orchids to hang…. And the front wall for my wijayakusuma to bloom happily. And, it has comfortable space for friends and family to stay overnight or just pay a short visit.
I am so thankful for what I am given in my life. I hope I still have a chance to share more with all my frineds and family and all animals around me.
Light is coiling around me, praying for the best.
My house is there to pray for me…. I’m here somewhere praying for my house.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you….
Erawan, Bangkok – March 16, 2017 – 22:16
I support animal lovers and rescuers by praying for them or when I’m able I’d like to donate or accompany them to take care of those animals. But honestly I mostly support them from a distance…. The lowest level of caring but the best I can.
About two weeks ago a friend of mine texted me to pray for Blacky, a little cutie pie that was suffering from vomitting after every meal of his. Blacky, a black-with-white-spots kitten was waiting for exchanging blessings with me.
This is Blacky, when he was up and around.
Blacky was transported by his mommy named Amie by bus for about 3 hours. What a lovely journey for Blacky and Amie the mommy….! To get him cured. Vet said that Blacky suffered from kidney disfunction. Or, at least that was the result after some examination by the vet plus X-Ray.
Blacky and mommy Amie
Mommy had to go home to Tangerang, Banten because she had to work. But Blacky ought to stay — he was exhausted and needed some rest because of Tangerang – Jakarta trip and his sickness. Then it was decided to put Blacky in an animal clinic in Kemang.
Blacky with siblings — all those sweet creatures
Blacky was not getting better. He kept vomitting and decided to leave, he was departing to the land across beautiful ocean. On his last day he ate a little and got positive energy support from another friend of mine. But Blacky really wanted to leave. He was happy and still is now.
Blacky felt the love of mommy Amie and thanked the Universe for sending her to take care of him in his very short life span. He was serving himself as a cat and it was his best serviceat that time. He would love to serve a better role in his next span of life and the Universe already grants his wish.
He will be borne as a boy or a girl who gets so much love…. Namaste….
He will be borne as a boy or a girl who is raised by loving and caring parents…. Namaste.
He is blessed and giving blessings.
Breastfed together to mommy cat
Thank you Blacky for being present in my life although we never met face to face…. I feel the love of yours and mommy Amie’s love.
Please be safe in your trip to your better future. Til we meet again….
Jalan Putri Hijau, Medan – October 2, 2015 – 12:23am
Morning wind’s
Breezing through open window
Opened by mom.
Thanks to all of mothers in the world for being valuable for their children….
Temasek – March 9, 2015 – 6:25am
There are a lot of things left behind the schedule if I talk about my life plan.
http://www.globaldms.com/blog/bid/149727/Dodd-Frank-Act-Finds-Itself-Behind-Schedule
I plan to get married at 25 years old but happen to be single until 39. Plan to have a house by 30 but got it by 35. To have iPod, iPhone, iPad, MacBook as soon as they were launched but I could just got them all as one package two years ago — just right after I reached Singapore for a new job. To enjoy meditation years ago but being able to do it just three years ago. To do this and that, all with delay….
http://www.visionsforhr.com/2012/01/how-apple-changed-my-life/
But that’s life, to wait for things happen with real patience. When the time is just right, all will come. Needless to say, but like working on repeated actions requiring ergonomics, it takes good stance and poise to get all life plans done. Stance is focusing on priority, poise is doing the best.
http://www.boattest.com/Resources/view_news.aspx?NewsID=2997
To be just right is a main goal of mine now. To be at the point of understanding that I can only plan and work on my plans without extremely targeting when and how I should reach the dream. Dreams will come true, we should believe — as part of flame to keep up good things. But when and how…. That is just right at the end of the tunnel, we can only see the light without seeing the details of it.
Ahhh…. I’ve been so much treating my life seriously. Time to enjoy every tap of my steps and every tick of my second…. All is well and it can never be enough to say “thanks”. Anyway…
…. Thanks for everything, my Universe….
Muar, Malaysia – September 21, 2014 – 7:36pm
When I get sick, I sometimes get confused if I have to visit doctor…. Too much medication will make me suffer: allergy, smelly urine, dizziness, etc.
Being a moron, oftentimes I forgot that I have my own way of healing myself. Meditation, sleeping (perfect meditation), drinking more water, working out, listening to music, drawing, etc.
I got constipation. Severe constipation I almost got poisoned because this body was overloaded with waste. I took medication and didn’t get better, I even could not sleep and my stomach and almost all part of my trunk got ached. So much burdened with unpredicted pain.
Then I remember something: draw something. I took my Faber-Castell watercolor pencils. Yellow, dark green and blue…. Lines, waves, curves, shapes of circles, a lot of color blocking and some words of positive affirmation. I imagined all those pictures are the representatives of my sickness as well as the curing & opening solution….
Amazing!
I got better… Really better, not 100% though. At least I know I am getting well.
Drawing is a therapy, yes it is.
Tips:
1. Focus on where the pain is coming from,
2. Take any color by reflect, don’t change color you like – let hand move to its slated pencil,
3. Keep focusing on the pain and follow the hand movement
4. Affirm that you are opening the door of relief to the sickness,
5. Change pencil as the hand wants to change the colors,
6. Affirm that the drawing is taking all the pain from the parts of body,
7. Calm down as the hand movement is feeling sufficient,
8. Thank to Universe for everything.
Thank you……
YCK Rd. – Sunday, July 6, 2014 – 4:19pm
Finally I got the visa for Taiwan just one half day before I flew to the country. It was a business trip and at the same time to meet the warm people in which I am working.
Taiwan in my first visit last year has given me a very good impression. I was invited to a dinner with a friend. They welcomed me so nicely, respected me like an long lost friend. In the small restaurant almost all guests were looking at me because of my different apparel (I’m a muslim woman and wear headdress.) and they smiled at me after my friend explained “muslim, muslim…”.
And, since then Taiwan has been one of my favorite countries among them visited.
In my recent visit my friend invited all of me and other colleagues to a local restaurant to enjoy Taiwan local cuisine. A lot of food, big smiles, sincerity gliding in the air…. Thank you, Joanne….
Let’s note that when we come to a place, it is not the luxury that impresses you first. It is always how the human beings are treating us. Let’s be warm heart and welcome fellow creatures on earth. Once we share a good space for others, they would love to take us to their heart….
If I have time, I’d like to visit this country not for work, to take my dear family here to enjoy the warmth of the people’s heart in the small country.
YCK Road – June 16, 2014 – 12:06am
Picture borrowed from http://elderbrucewhite.blogspot.sg/2011_05_01_archive.html
opening the door,
will I see you?
or, is it only your shadow? pretending to be you….
did I live with you? or with your shadow?
is it now that you are real or shadow?
tears flow, flowing along the path pushing through the door at the end.
what end? is there an end?
or a start? what should be started?
are you there?
welcoming me or welcoming my shadow?
am I real me or just my shadow?
just the two of us….
staring at each other – shadow to shadow?
I just hope you are the one behind the door….
Hilton KL – April 30, 2014 – 12:49am
My body is lighter, when I sleep…. I can fly to all places I want to go and meet with anybody I want to encounter with. As long as I sleep well, I would dream and only then I will remember what I dream when I wake up later. 
I should let myself be light, even lighter so that I can gain whatever I want to. I travel in my good sleep. I greet my beloved ones in my good sleep. I just need to sleep well to dream and at the same time to realise my dream. 
I believe my dream is as real as the reality when I am awake. My reality in awake state is when the body experiences all things in life. But in dream is when my soul lets my body take a rest and it goes by itself experiencing etheric reality…. So, no matter what I dream I would thank that in the name of God I get what my body has dreamt of in the day. Oh…. how light I am now, sleepy…. Need some good sleep and sweet dream. Let me meet my Bob, my late father and any other beloved ones living in the world, in this matrix…. I am sorry I am actually chattering….. Sorry but I feel so light and want to sleep to realise my dream….
YCK Rd – March 3, 2014 – 11:18pm
He used to be the biggest enemy of Bob in Bob’s earlier stay in my mom’s house. He was very skinny then, always trying to peep what Bob was having for meal. Bob would stay inside, not wanting to go out welcome by his evil stare.
Mr. Gray is a tomcat which is now occupying my mom’s terrace – one corner where a curling water hose is put.
I am Mr. Gray….
He is there every single day, sleeping and curling, yawning and waiting for meal after Bob has finished the food on the plate. He is not so much evil to Bob anymore because he knows he will never replace Bob’s position in our heart. But he is trying to behave nicer by staying away from Bob – except at night when Bob is outside we sometimes hear they still quarrel over female cats…. Let it be, they are real cats.
Mr. Gray has become new member in our family. We won’t let him in though. We just spare a corner outside that we think still comfortable for him to nap. We give him meal every time Bob finishes with the breakfast, brunch, lunch, dinner or supper.
Mr. Gray would shout at us if we forget to feed him…. So sweet….
We know it is additional energy needed to share but it is good to share, even only with a cat.
Seeing that Mr. Gray behaves less evil to Bob, we are relieved. That Mr. Gray is fatter, we are thankful. That Mr. Gray lives a bit happily, we are also happy.
Thanks, Mr. Gray…. For being a good fellow creature enjoying the blessing under the sky…. We know you always pray for our good so that you can get good things from us.
We love you, Mr. Gray…. Go ahead napping….
Yio Chu Kang Rd, February 15, 2014 – 6:16pm
Mr. Gray is meowing: “Food, food…. I am hungry…”
KEKASIH SEJATI
Dimana kusimpan dustaku jika Kau mengawalku dengan kamera yang terpasang di tiap partikel udara?
Dimana kuselipkan kedukaan jika Kau jejali pori-poriku dengan asa?
Dimana kucipta amarah jika Kau taburi tarikan nafasku dengan wangi surga?
Dimana kulari dariMu jika Kau kendarai aras jiwaku?
Yang Terkasih, hadapku selalu padaMu.
kalau bisa
kalau bisa
kalau tidak bisa?
Hidup ini memang antara bisa dan tak bisa:
Yang ditentukan oleh Pemilik bahasa.
Nov 25, 2007 – 08:37pm
Allah pemilik bahasa. Maka belajarlah bahasa kepadaNya supaya engkau dapat menentukan bisa dalam setiap langkah tujuanmu. Subhanallah.
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